Don't Mess with Sealing, You Idiot
by V.I. Winthrop
Summary: What happens when mix a fireball with fuinjutsu? Your twin brother sends you and your sisters to a dimension where Mom's a guy, Dad's married to the big fan lady, and Mom's kids have whiskers! Taka, you are dead meat! Join Mira and her siblings as they discover a different Konoha! AU with Ocs, with FemNaru, better summary in first chapter.
1. We are so grounded

**Author's Note- Well, hey guys! (Dodges another freaking chair, seriously, where do they keep coming from?) Ok, so if you guys are reading this because of my other story, I'll explain about that at the end of the chapter. However, this isn't Harry Potter, no this is Naruto and man, I'm actually really excited! First off though, obviously, this is complete AU, while crossover from my made up AU to Canon Naruto/Boruto. Long story short, I read a bunch of Naruto fics that ask the question, what would happen if Naruto was actually a girl? Well, I'm taking a slightly different root and diving head first into what happens if Boruto generation meets their counterparts from a different universe. And surprise, that universe has Fem Naruto! So, if you don't like it, don't read it. You've been warned. Anyway, I should also note that I'm not the biggest fan of Boruto and if I get some plot points wrong, Oops. So this take places after the Chunin exams and I'm making it so that Boruto and crew are genin because it makes no sense to me why Boruto is a genin in the movie but still an academy brat in the anime so you know what, instant promotion! (You're welcome, Boruto, you little shit) And lastly, I blame the amazing fics,** ** _All Started with a Smell and Deja Vu no Jutsu_** **for giving me the inspiration for this fic! Alright, that should be everything! On to the story!**

Chapter 1: We are so grounded…

 _Shikadai_

If there was one thing Shikadai hated, it was how loud the friends could be. Don't get him wrong, he liked his friends. But there was a reason that on the only day off he's gotten in two weeks that he decided to not go outside. He wanted to nap, he really wanted to nap. Unfortunately, Chocho and Boruto wouldn't hear it.

"Come on, dude! We got five more months before we can take the Chunin exams again, we need to train!" Boruto had stated as Chocho used her ridiculously stupid strength to sling him over her shoulder when he tried to ignore his friends and fall back asleep.

Shikadai wanted to be sassy, saying something like, ' _It's a miracle that you're even allowed to participate in the next exam, asshole._ ' But, he had already forgiven Boruto and decided that opening that bag of worms again would more troublesome than it was worth. The two teams, plus Metal Lee, had just stepped into Shikadai's backyard when the ground started to shake violently.

"Ow!" Shikadai yelped when Chocho dropped him as she stumbled bring their teammate down with her. Boruto, Mitsuki and Lee ended up on their asses too, though Mitsuki looked more curious than scared. Sarada's eyes flashed red as she pointed shakily in front of her.

"Over here!" He could feel his eyes widening in disbelief. There was a gigantic, white energy lined hole in the middle of his mother's flower garden. An overwhelming sense of dread filled him at the idea of explain to his mother why she lost her petunias. Then, the hole spat out, kids?!

No, really, it was like they were shot out of a canon. Shikadai couldn't help the wince that escaped him as the boy took the brunt of the landing. The group collapsed into a pile next to one another. Yep, those were definitely kids that were collapsed out in the backyard. Three girls and one boy.

There was an awkward staring contest that commenced, his friends just as god smacked as he was. His brain refused to connect the dots and Shikadai resisted the urge to yell out "Kai!" The two eldest seemed to react quicker than everyone else. Before Shikadai could blink, the eldest girl with brown hair snatched up what looked like her mini-me before darting into the Nara forest, the blond boy already in the lead with the red-head in his arms.

"Hey wait!" And they gave chase.

 _Boruto_

"Huh? Why did we stop? We could have got them!" Boruto was sure that they could have caught up to those strange portal kids. Then they would have beaten them up (not the non-shinobis, of course) and brought them before his dad. And once his good for nothing Dad saw how awesome he was, he would have to recognize him (and his friends.)

"This is as far into the forest that I'm allowed in." Shikadai stated. You could see in his eyes that his mind was going a mile a minute. "The fact that the deer haven't done anything though, it's weird."

"Weird or not, did anyone get a good look at them?" Sarada asked, pushing her red glasses up the bridge of her nose, the light reflecting off it.

"No, my most youthful companions! They ran off at such a youthful speed at I was too distracted to notice them!" Great, the run had clearly put Lee into one of his youthful moods again… at least there was no rainbow genjustu this time.

"The boy that carried the red head looked a little like you, Boruto." Mitsuki commented cheerfully.

"Eh? Really?" Boruto hadn't really noticed because that guy had ran away fast with the other girl right on his heels.

"Maybe we should head back," Sarada suggested. "the ANBU will get them."

"Yeah guys, its getting close to lunch time and I'm starving." Chocho complained and her stomach grumbled in agreement. Inojin, looking entirely too much like Uncle Sai, commented,

"That's possible?" The punch that followed was totally expected.

What wasn't expected was the arrival of Kakashi when they enter Shikadai's backyard again, twenty minutes later. The sixth Hokage looked annoyed and the moment his eyes landed on Boruto, the older man asked,

"What did you do?"

"Me!?" This was total unfair, he hadn't done anything today!

"Yes, you. Right now, your father has two genin, a seven and a four-year-old in his office saying that they've come from a different Konoha. So, what did you do?" Kakashi pressed again. For some reason, Kakashi and Boruto had never really got along. Sarada had always been his favorite out the Team 7 offspring and he made that really clear.

"For once, he didn't do anything," Sarada explained. "They-"

"They came out of a hole from my mom's petunias." Shikadai drawled out bluntly, pointing to the large burnt mark in the flowers. Boruto could picture Shikadai's mom face the moment she saw it. Note to self, stay away from the Nara compound for two days.

"This is such a drag." Everyone snapped up to look at Hokage's advisor, his hands stuff in his pockets and his shoulders hunched. Uncle Shikamaru had the same look on his face as Kakashi. He stalked towards the group of genin before clapping his hands down on the heads of his son and godson. Boruto glanced at Shikadai, who looked just as confused as he felt.

"Come on, you two, we're going to the tower." Uncle Shikamaru explained. He dropped his hands before he started walking towards the tower.

"Boys."

"Coming."

Boruto hated his dad's office. It was busy, always full of paperwork and a constant reminder about why he was always late for dinner and never home. So yeah, he hated the place. Who would ever want to be Hokage anyway?

His dad sat at his desk, his cape on his chair and his bandaged hand rubbing his temples. On the other side of the desk were the kids from earlier. Boruto looked at them. The most noticeable one was the guy, being that he was the one guy of the bunch. He was a little taller than Shikadai and himself but he looked about the same age as them. He had dirty blond hair that was tied back in a low ponytail at the back of his neck. However, some of his hair fell into his tan face and forehead protector, kinda reminding Boruto of Aunt Ino. He wore a skin-tight navy shirt with the standard shinobi pants and sandals. Lastly, he had his tools strapped to his leg and bandages wrapped over his knuckles to his elbows. Huh, he didn't look that tough.

The eldest girl turned to face him and Boruto couldn't help it. The girl was pretty, like really pretty. Not in the artificial way like, ugh fangirls, but in an understated, kick ass kunoichi way. Boruto puffed his chest out slightly only to shrink back slightly when the guy's blue eyes narrow dangerously. Anyway, the girl was dressed in a black, sleeveless shirt, black skin-tight leggings, and black shinobi sandals. To add some color, she had a darker red, almost purple, kimono like top over it. Her forehead protector was wrapped around her arm like Shikadai's. Besides the standard shinobi tools, her high bun looked riddle with senbon, framing it like a crown. Her dark brown, almost black bangs shaped her pale face and covered her forehead. Lastly, her sapphire blue eyes seemed to be lined with kohl, making them stand out even more.

The eldest two each had a munchkin with them. The guy was piggyback the redhead girl with golden brown eyes. The girl was cradling her mini clone in her arms as the little one slept peacefully on her shoulder. In all, the pair didn't look that specially or intimidating. It would only be later that he would regret those words.

"Would you two like to introduce yourself?" Dad's question snapped Boruto back into attention as the guy stepped forward. He was moving almost lazily, but his eyes were attentive and his muscles were tense. He quickly bowed towards his dad before straightening, the girl still clinging to him.

"I'm Takashi Uzumaki-"

"What?!"

 _Mira_

Mira was going to kill her brother. There was no doubt in her mind that the moment they got back home, her beloved twin brother would be strangled so badly by her shadows that he would be blue in the face for a month. Because this was all his fault! Completely his stupid, genius fault!

Now, the twins had done some amazingly troublesome stuff before. All in the name of pranks, of course. Like the time they made the Academy invisible for a week. Or the time they replaced all of the water in the ANBU headquarters with sake, _without getting caught_. Or the time they let the deer stampede into the Hyuga compound. But this time, the blame lied solely on Takashi and his stupid fuinjutsu!

Ok, so maybe she had egged him on a little… ok, a lot. But still, Mira really couldn't be blamed for this… Actually, knowing her parents, the twins were both going to be grounded until they were jonins. Ugh, having to do D-ranks again with that stupid cat _that wouldn't die_ made her flinch. _What a drag…_ And the day had started off so well for her.

It was the first time in two weeks that her team and Taka's had the same day off. Naturally, Team 7 and Team 10 found themselves in the Nara compound, using the gigantic field Dad had built under the house for Mom when they got married. Anyway, the two teams decided to do a sparing tag team match against each other. After drawing names, the teams were the twins v. Sarada and Chocho v. Inojin and Kenji. It was an easy win for the twins, given their innate teamwork and as Inojin puts it, _really creepy twin telepathy_.

"Taka, are you still working on that thing?" Mira asked her twin, Takashi, as they sat on the sidelines. The rest of their teams were having a rematch because Inojin had said something insensitive again. Taka lifted his sky-blue eyes up lazily at her, his scroll and ink laying in front of him.

"Don't ask troublesome questions that you already know the answer to, sis." He answered back, his eyes drifting back to the seal. She rolled her own blue eyes before stating,

"You know, Mom's going to kill you if she finds out that your messing with that thing without her supervision."

"What Mom doesn't know won't kill her. Besides, you're the one who said I couldn't figure it out. I'll just blame you for giving me the idea." He smirked at her. She was about to snap back a sassy reply when their little sisters slipped through the door. Naturally, the twins' over productive instincts shot up in attention.

"Beni, Motoko, get over here." Mira ordered as Taka shifted over to give the younger girls space. The last thing the twins need was for their sisters to get hit by a fireball or an inked lion under their watch again. Benihime raced over, her long red hair making her look like a firecracker while Motoko tried to keep up. Unfortunately for the poor four-year-old, Beni's seven-year-old legs were faster.

"Taka, Mira! Shino-Sensei let us out early today and I ran into Granny and I …" Benihime's mouth started running a mile a minute as she recounted her afternoon. Taka tuned her out, nodding along sluggishly as Beni decided her big brother's shoulder were an appropriate seat for her to continue her story.

That was Beni for you. Young, energetic, with a big heart and an even bigger mouth. It was no wonder Dad jokes that if she didn't have his eyes, he would have been worried. Clearly, Beni wasn't your stereotypical Nara.

Motoko, on the other hand, was definitely the most like Dad. Even though she was young, little Motoko didn't do much. She slept, she watched Dad play shogi, she watched Mom train, she slept some more. Which explains why the littlest Nara decided to use her eldest sister's lap as a pillow.

So, how did a such a normal day such as this turn into a day of hell? Well, apparently you can bat a fireball into a different direction with the Hyuga's Revolving Heaven.

"Look out!" Too bad it was headed for the siblings. _Shit!_

Now, it should be noted that Mira has a photographic memory. Taka may be more creative and can figure out patterns better but Mira remembers everything, down to the smallest detail. So the very fact that she can't, for the life of her, figure out how Taka's seal activated bugged the living crap out of her.

But the seal did activate, which was why Mira and her siblings were currently falling through a portal/tunnel/whatever the fuck it was. There was a light at the end of it and they were rapidly approaching it.

"What the Hell?!" Taka cursed as before the younger girls screamed, reminding their shinobi siblings that, yes, they were falling to their deaths too. _How kind of them._

"The girls!" Mira reached out and tucked her sisters into her. And Taka, being the chivalrous brother that he was, wrapped his arms around her waist, the girls sandwiched between them. Then they hit the light at the end of the tunnel.

The sight of the kids scared the living shit out of her and filled her mind with unanswered questions. Questions like, what happen to the porch Dad had put in? Why was Mom's vegetable garden full of petunias? And why the flying fuck did Sarada have glasses on and what did she do to her hair? (The last question was the most important, obviously.) This place was different. Mira's eyes took in her surroundings as the group of kids sprawled out before them tried to make head and tails of what just happened. The moment Taka started running, Mira did to, Motoko clutched so tight to her chest it was almost suffocating. As the twins leaped into the forest, she caught sight out the craved mountain and everything clicked.

 _Taka_

"This can't be happening, Taka, you sent us into a different, fucking dimension!"

"You said a bad word, Bid Sister."

"So not the time, Motoko." Taka snarked before turning to glare at the sister speeding next to him. Beni had a death grip on his neck and was abnormally silent.

"What do you mean different dimension?" He asked as they maneuvered through the forest that they grow up in. Or at least, it looked like the forest they grew up. Taka was zooming through the forest and Mira was keeping pace. But he knew she couldn't keep this up forever and that they would have to stop for her to rest.

"Check out the Hokage Heads, smartass."

"…Ah, shit." Ah, shit was right. Even in the trees, Taka could see the heads of their leaders carved into the mountain cliff. Oh, the first six heads were fine, in fact, if Uncle Kakashi was there, he would joke that he never looked better. But it was the seventh face that made him pale.

Takashi was a mama's boy. His mother was absolutely the best human being in the world and no matter how troublesome or silly she could get, he would always love her. Dad had made a point to drill in the twins' heads that their Mom had done too much and suffer too much to have to deal with bratty, disrespectful children. The patriarch went into detail about her life before them and constantly remind them that they were to respect and honor her, not just because she was their Kage but because she was their mother.

Naruto Uzumaki was the world's greatest kunoichi, one of its few fuinjutsu mistresses and the best damn Hokage Konoha has had in a really long time. She was beautiful, powerful, and loving. So instead of seeing his mother's face carved into stone, her long braid elegantly designed into stone with it (because that was her signature look), a man's face replaced.

A man that looked eerily similar to the 4th Hokage. A man who, like his mother, wore his forehead protector proudly on his forehead. A man, like his mother, with 3 whisker marks on each cheek. Fucking A.

"Alright, girls, we're going to be seeing this world's Hokage really soon. No matter what, let us do the talking. You know nothing, got it?" Mira's voice left no room for discussion. The little girls gave their confirmation, because they were shinobi children and they knew an order when they heard one. A thought crashed into Taka.

"Beni, I need you to tie my forehead protector to my forehead. Mira-"

"Yeah, I get it. Motoko, tie mine to my upper left arm."

"Where Daddy has his?"

"Yep, where Daddy has his." Mira whispered back softly, as the realization hit the twins hard. Unlike what Inojin believes, they did not have twin telepathy. They were just really entuned with each other, obviously. And there were times when they just need to look at each to form the exact same plan or know what the other is thinking. And Mira look terrified.

Hell, he felt terrified too. This wasn't their Konoha and those kids, dammit, he knew Inojin, Chocho, Lee, Sarada and Mitsuki anywhere. But they were all dressed differently, almost like they were wearing civilian clothing for some unholy reason. (Well, expect for Lee, he looked exactly the same, which was strangely comforting.)

What really scared Taka though, was the two other boys. The boy with the Nara hair and teal eyes and the boy with Mom's coloring and whisker marks. Taka had a hunch about who those boys were. For the first time in a long time, he was hoping that he was wrong. About he was the son of a genius and he was rarely wrong.

"We lost the kids." Mira spoke after minutes passed. "They're still going to keep looking for us and then ANBUs going to show up. We need to talk to the Hokage as soon as possible."

"And tell him what?" Taka mumbled sarcastic. "Oh, hello Lord Hokage, we're just your kids from a different dimension. Did I forget to mention that you're a woman and our mom?" He could feel the glare that Mira was sending him.

"No, smartass, we're going to say as much as possible without saying anything at all. See if these guys can look beneath the underneath." She was smirking, you could tell it in her voice. While a risky plan, honestly, it was the only thing that they got that would work.

"Shall we go through the window then?"

"Let's." But first, Taka needed to fix his hair. The last thing they needed was to be questioned on his hairstyle and why Taka's blond hair had brown roots.

 **Author's Note - So, what did you guys think? Do you like it? Should I continue? Why is my female oc name Mira? Did you figure out the siblings' parents yet? Review your feeling to me, I thrive on reviews... and favorites... and follows. Now, for my Harry Potter fans, will I finish Harriet Potter's story? The honest answer is maybe... I kinda wrote myself into a block. Remember my note about wanting to expanded the Wizarding World, yeah, I made it too big and couldn't fix it. Also, I kinda fell out of love Harry Potter in general so who knows if I'm going to finish it. We'll see. Anyway, until next time. I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V. I. Winthrop**


	2. Motoko v The Lady with the Big Fan

**Author's Note- My friends, the writing bug has bit me again. However, his bites rarely last so don't expect a fast update any time soon! Also, on the note of POVs, I'm going to try and keep it with only the kids. For now. Maybe. At least until the parents show up to kick some major ass. (Oh, foreshadowing, duh, duh, DUH!) What else should I say? Oh, that's right. Heads up, it'll seem like I'm bashing Temari and Hinata in this fic when honestly, I'm not. Mira, Taka, Beni, and Motoko are! And why, you may ask? If you've figured out who their parents are (and you really should know by now), then it should be blatantly obvious why their kids are so protective, even to these guys who are actual their parents but close enough. Lastly, if you guys are new to my fics, I've got a mild case of dyslexia that likes to screw with my writing. Even after rereading this chapter so many times, I'll probably find some grammatical error in here. Oh well, c'est la vie. Well, hope you guys like the chapter! On to the story!**

Chapter 2: Motoko v. The Lady with the Big Fan

 _Mira_

You know, Mira was really disappointed with this male version of Mom. To be frank, he looked too tired to be the kick ass Hokage that Mira could sense that he was. And it wasn't that the man wasn't handsome, he was, but he looked so un-shinobi. She didn't know what she was expecting but a man in civilian like clothes, no forehead protector and an office filled to the nine with paperwork was not it. The sheer amount of paperwork in the room was ghastly and she tried to remember a time if Mom's office was ever this discombobulated. Nope, she couldn't think off anything. Taka and her must have been in harmony because she could just tell that he was thinking the same things.

"So, let me get this straight. You come from a place where your Hokage is a woman," they nodded, "you were sparing in the Nara compound because Mira invited your teams over," another nod, "and you, Takashi, were messing with an unknown seal that somehow activated when a stray fireball came headed your way."

"Yep, sounds about right." Mira almost chirped, but stopped herself. She had to be more Nara like. More, well not lazy because that was really hard for her, but definitely more laid-back and uncaring. She could show emotions, because no, Naras aren't cold-hearted bastards, they just don't care about other people's bullshit. She just couldn't let her more bubbly side show in front of the man who really should have sent them to T&I the moment they showed up at his window.

The lack of security in this world was a little terrifying, in a weird way. If an unknown person had showed up at Mom's window like they had, you better believe that Dad would have definitely sent them straight to Aunt Ino. So what if he bloodied them a bit, as long as the person was breathing and the head still attached to the body, Aunt Ino could read their memories. Mira shouldn't be complaining though, the lack of ANBU and security made it easier for her family to talk with the Hokage.

"I don't get paid enough for this." The Lord Hokage grumbled. Mira and her family had agreed before meeting the man that calling him Lord Hokage to his face would make everyone's life much easier. The last thing they needed was to be called him Mom. Besides, in her thoughts, he was now dubbed Guy Mom.

"But…" Taka urged. Lord Hokage sighed before he gave them a small smile.

"But I believe you." Taka had raised his hand already so that her excited hi-five to him made it look like him started it, not her. Beside them, Beni relaxed, a grin spreading wide across her face. And Motoko, well, Motoko was in her lap doing the sleeping/resting/still hearing every word in the conversation thing that she could do.

"However, I am curious. You two are Uzumakis?" The man asked, the question pointed at Taka. Mira could almost sigh in relief at how easy their plan was working. The key to it was to break up her siblings. An almost herculean task in any normal situation, but this was far from normal.

Mira and Motoko have always looked the most Nara out of the four siblings. Taka and Beni, on the other hand, looked about as Uzumaki as you can get, especially with Beni's hair. It helped that when Mira and Taka became Chunin, they decided it would be easier if Mira was known as Chunin Nara and Taka was known as Chunin Uzumaki.

"Yes, sir. I'm Takashi Uzumaki and this my little sister, Benihime." Taka spoked with a slight grin. Besides, Taka wasn't lying to the kage, he just wasn't saying the whole truth.

"Ah, the crimson princess. Very fitting." The Hokage chuckled and Beni flashed him back a smile before he turned to face Mira.

"Mira Nara, sir, and my little sister, Motoko. Please excuse her, she likes to nap." Who ever told you that be polite got you no where was a loser and a liar. They had the Hokage right where they needed him. Then, the office door opened and Mira smelled tobacco.

She froze, as she watched the male kage's face lighten up as he greeted his advisor. So happy was the man that he missed how Beni and Motoko mouthed the word 'Daddy' while Taka pulled Beni closer to his side, his entire body tenser than a steel rod. But she could feel those calculating eyes bore into her back. And his chakra, sweet god, it felt the same. The cool, comforting and protective feeling she got whenever Dad was close by. But this wasn't her father, even if they had the same name.

"Shikamaru, you'll never believe what happened!"

"Four kids destroyed my wife's petunias." It would have been really amusing to see a grown man sweat-drop over his friend's sarcasm if she wasn't about to have an emotional break down. Because, really, the only reason they had been doing so well was because Lord Hokage was by himself when they explained their (mostly) accurate story to him. They were running on pure luck and it looked like it was about to run out. Because if this plan was going to fail, it was going to be because of this man.

"Are these them?" The familiar baritone voice asked lazily, but Mira could tell that his eyes were analyzing them. Ok, Mr. Not Dad, let's see how long it takes you to figure us out. She stood up lethargically, faking a yawn as she gently placed Motoko on the grounded in front of her, facing her father's doppelganger.

Mira kept her eyes from widening at the sight of him. In a way, it was probably a good thing he dressed differently from her Jonin Commander father. That and his muscles didn't look as toned as Dad's. Yet, he was still tall, he still smoked, and he still had that stupid goatee. Thankfully, Mom convinced Dad to make it into a full-on beard, which made him look ten times better with the stupid thing. Gently, she pushed the back of Motoko's neck, getting her into a full bow as she did the same.

"Troublesome," She actually didn't have fake that part of her speech. "Lord Nara, we would like to formally apologize for destroying the Lady Nara's petunias." _Even if they were ugly and unkept._ "And for entering your yard without your permission. Please, forgive us."

She expected him to pull an Uncle Kakashi, to say "don't say such formal things," or even to just say "what a drag." Yet, he nodded to them, allowing them to raise from their bow before he asked,

"Apology accepted. You know I'm the Lord Nara?"

"I know my history, sir." _Ah shit, good job with that one, Mira. You've screwed up already._

"History?" He questioned before his Kage started explaining enthusiastically about the siblings' (if only they knew) story. Motoko tugged on her leggings, demanding to be lifted again in the universal body movement of lifting her arms and giving her the puppy dog eyes. _Lazy little sister, I'm so proud!_

"You think this is time travel?" At Not Dad's (she needed a better name for him but her brain was a little uncreative) question, Mira had to force back her smirk. Yeah, they could fake that for a bit. Apparently, Mom's luck had rubbed off of them. Sweet!

"Think about it, Shika!" If it wasn't for their shinobi training, Mira and Taka would have flinched at how similar the situation looked and sounded to them. "These kids said their Hokage is a woman which means that it has to be time travel. Sarada must have become Hokage!"

So, the Sarada here also wanted to be hokage? Ok, so her best friend hadn't changed too much. But she still needed to interrogate her about those glasses.

"And since they time-traveled, they can't tell us that much about their future because it'll risk the space-time continuum!" Lord Hokage continued to babble. Taka sweat-dropped quietly behind her, little weirded out by Guy Mom's imagination. Eh, she didn't really care about it as long as they got back home soon. And honestly, his imagination reminded her of home.

"I mean, look at that hair," The Kage pointed to Beni's long red locks. "That's Uzumaki red if I've ever seen it." To help the situation, Beni leaped out from behind Taka's leg and did a twirl, her hair being the center of attention. Mira didn't even fight the smile that graced her face, because Beni had been so quiet and unlike herself that it was unnerving. Beni got Not Dad to crack a smile too before stating,

"Alright, so we've got four time-travelers, where are we going to do with them?"

"How about giving your brats babysitting duty?" A drawl voice spoke from the window. _Had they left it open?_ There crouched on the sill was Uncle Kakashi. She could have kissed him because finally, _finally_ , someone looked like a shinobi! Because, really, what is with this dimension and not looking like shinobis?

"Hello, Lord Sixth." Taka smirked out as Beni latched herself at him. Mira would have been worried that she was breaking the plan if it wasn't the fact that the mischievous look hadn't returned into her eyes. The masked Kage's eyes widen as he scrambled to catch the red-head child. She latched onto him, a big, Uzumaki, shit-eating grin on her face.

"Hi, I'm Benihime Uzumaki but you can call me Beni! What's your name? Are you actually Lord Sixth? Why are you wearing a mask? Can I see your face? How did you do that to your hair? Can you do that to mine?" And her mouth kept running, spewing out question after question that she already knew the answers to. Why was Beni doing this? Because this was her thing with Uncle Kakashi, to talk his ear off so that he would be distracted and flustered until he gave in to whatever her little heart desired. And she played him like a whistle.

"Beni, leave Lord Sixth alone." Taka ordered after a minute, because clearly the other authority figures were too dumfounded by Beni's Talk no Jutsu skills. _Taught to her by yours truly_. It was funny as hell to watch though.

"Kay!" She chirped back, before looking at Uncle Kakashi's flustered face. "You, me, ramen, tomorrow at lunch, don't be late or I will know." With that, she untangled her arms from his neck and skipped back to Taka. With a jump, she was on his back, demanding him for her customary piggyback ride.

"There's two of them?" Uncle Kakashi whimpered out rather pitifully. Oh, Uncle Kakashi, you've seen nothing yet.

"Anyway, maybe it would be a good idea to let the kids watch them?" Not Dad commented. He stroked his goatee, as continued to analyze the kids in front of him. "Kakashi, can you find them for me? I'll be right behind you."

Uncle Kakashi, still freaked out by earlier, didn't need to be asked twice. He was gone before she could blink.

"Ah…" Beni moaned. "He left before I could figure out the best place to get ramen. Lord Hokage, where's the best place to get ramen?" There was a reason Beni was allowed to ask her silly question. She had this strange talent for distracting authority figures from their tasks so that they (Mira and Taka) could finish whatever prank they were doing. Like the time she stalled Uncle Gaara so that they could finish making Kankaro's war paint permanent and turned his cat ears hat/thing into a tiara. _We trained her so well!_

As the Lord Hokage started to ramble on and on about the glories of Ichiraku Ramen, which they already knew about (that's where dinner was every Friday night), Not Dad had left the office. Guy Mom's rambles were illogical but so relaxing to hear that Mira didn't feel so homesick anymore. Sure, the man in the office wasn't Mom, but at the same time he was and just his smile alone brought them all peace.

The Kage tensed though, after a few minutes, pausing his speech before dropping his head into his bandaged hand. _Uh, maybe he hurt it in a spar? But Kurama should have healed it by now._

"I apologize in advance for anything my son does or say." Taka locked eyes with her, just as the office door opened again, behind them. Slowly, she turned to look at Not Dad, Teal-Eyes and Whiskers.

The boys looked like civilians who were playing Ninja. The Nara boy had his hair up in traditional fashion and his forehead protector was in the right place. But none of his clothes looked to be out of shinobi certified material. Nonetheless, Teal-Eyes looked so much like Taka that they should have been the twins. Their chin line was the same, their nose, their ears, the slouches, their posture. Another joke back at home was that Taka was Dad's clone that got the wrong coloring in the lab. Mom, without fail, would always comment 'That is your son, Shikamaru!' or 'You get that from your father!' or if he was acting even lazier and more like Dad than normal 'Takashi, I swear if you start smoking like your father, neither of you are going to see the light of day!'

Back to Teal-Eyes, yep, he looked so Nara, especially with the 'I'm so not wake enough for any of your bullshit' look in his eyes. Speaking of his eyes, they were teal, duh, and Mira knew who his mom was without even asking. _Great, just what we need._

Whiskers, on the other hand, was checking her out and being blatantly obvious about it, which was just, ew, no! For once, she was grateful for Taka's overprotectiveness. Though, she was 99.9997% certain that Taka and Dad had a master plan to ensure that the girls would never date until they were Jonin, the evil bastards. Either way, Whiskers looked a lot like Lord Hokage. Oddly enough, his forehead protector had a gigantic slash through the leaf, as if he was a missing-nin. And he wore pink, like hot, neon pink lined the details of his mostly black ensemble. And his hair was too, for a lack of a better word, designed, as if the guy spent hours in the morning to make it look this way. _Hours wasted if you ask me._

Mira was eternally grateful to whatever deity ensured that she and her siblings didn't have the whiskers. It was bad enough on missions when people recognized her eyes. The last thing she needed was for someone to take one look at her cheeks and shout, "It's the Hokage's daughter!"

"Would you two like to introduce yourself?" Guy Mom's question cause Taka to step forward. Beni was still clinging to him but she was happy and back to normal, which was good. He quickly bowed towards the Hokage, as he should, before straightening and meeting the eyes of the two boys. Taka opened his mouth. A smirk emerged on her lips. This was going to be fun.

"I'm Takashi Uzumaki-"

"What?!" Sheesh, did Whiskers have lungs of steel or what? But the absolutely wide eyed, completely baffled look on his face was total worth it. Teal-Eyes didn't look much better, his jaw nearly reaching the floor.

"Boruto, let him finish. Please continue." A screw? This version of Mom name her first born child screw? Ok then… Mira was now really curious to find out who the hell Boruto's mom was.

"And this my little sister, Benihime. Mira, you're up." Mira stepped forward, trying to make herself appear as laid-back as possible.

"Yo," She said lazily, giving a little wave with one hand, cradling Motoko in the other. "The name's Mira Nara. And this is Motoko." She placed her hand gently on the child's hair, massaging it slightly to get her to lift her head. Her amethyst, sleepy eyes looked at the boys, nodded to them, before returning her forehead to the crook of Mira's neck.

"What's your name?" Beni asked, pointing one hand at Teal-Eyes. The guy shook himself out of his stupor.

"I'm Shikadai Nara and this is Boruto Uzumaki." The now christened, Shikadai, explained as Boruto also accepted the reality that was occurring. _Welcome to the party, dude!_

"Well, this is all nice and stuff, but why are we here, Old Man?" The sneer in Boruto's voice from the question but Mira and Taka both tense. That vitriol added to the words 'Old Man' made Mira want to fry this guy like a lightning rod. How dare he speak to his Hokage, to his _own father_ , in such a way? If her and Taka tried to do that to Mom, Dad would beat the disrespect out of them sooner than you could say kunai! And Kage just took it and his Advisor said nothing, as if this was a common occurrence. Oh no, that wasn't going to fly, not by a long shot.

"You're here to escort Takashi and his sister to your mother, son." The upset Hokage stated, clearly disheartened by his own son. "And you, Shikadai, are going to escort Mira and her sister to your house. They're going to be staying with us. These four have stumbled into our time and they need to figure out a way to get back home. You two are going to watch over them while they're here. I need you guys to show them around and make sure nothing happens to them or the village. Understood?" While Shikadai nodded back to the Kage, Boruto huffed and threw his arms behind his head, scoffing.

"Whatever, Old Man. Come on, dude. Mom can make us lunch." Mira and Taka glared at the boy's back as he left the office before Taka turned to the Hokage, the question in his eyes.

"May Mira and I train while we're here, sir?" Taka's question caused the two men to lock eyes. The scene was painful to watch because all she could see was Mom and Dad, doing the exact same silent discussion with eye contact alone. Finally, the men broke away and the Hokage nodded.

"You better hurry, if you want to caught up with-" But Taka was already out the window, Beni laughing happily from his back as they leap out the window. They must have landed right in front of Boruto, if his scared yelp was anything to go by. Mira turned to face the Nara men, a smirk on her porcelain face and Motoko smirking into her shoulder.

"Shall we, boys?" Let the pranking begin.

 _Shikadai_

The walk back home was a little weird for Shikadai, especially since the girl, Mira, seemed right at home and really didn't need him as an escort. But an order was an order, and the girls didn't seem too troublesome. They looked and acted like Naras so they couldn't be that bad… right?

Dad had stayed back at the office, with a promise that he'll be home for dinner, on time for once, and don't worry about Mom, she never liked those flowers anyway. Which was a lie if Shikadai ever heard one. Mom, even though she couldn't garden to save her life, loved those god damn weeds because it proved to Grandma Yoshino that yes, she could be domestic if she wanted to be. Thus, Mom was going to be pissed when she found out. Then he was going to get in trouble for no reason. Again. How troublesome.

"So Shikadai, anything I should know about before we enter the Lion's Den?" For a time-traveler, Mira was strangely calm about her situation. Then again, the girl had an oddly intimidating feel about her, even if she didn't look like much. Like she could just look at you and that you would be under her spell within a second. Nah, he was overthinking again. This girl really didn't look that tough, just your standard kunoichi genin. He would regret those words soon.

"My mom's troublesome?" Shikadai stated slowly, not sure him this was the answer that she wanted.

"What else is new?" She snorted by asking, "No, I mean like, do you have a team? Are you the Nara heir? Why does Boruto disrespect the Hokage so much? Stuff like that."

"Um, yes, yes, and he's always done it so…" He probably shouldn't be telling this stuff but honestly, he was too tired to care. He really need to nap. _Like really need to_. He had practiced way too much with his yin release this week and it was coming back to bite him in the ass. Man, maybe if he just closed his eyes for a bit-

"Huh, ok then. Oh, we're here." Her nearly angelic voice brought him to reality. Looks like he was sleep walking again, great. He opened the front door to call out,

"Mom? I'm home?" But there was no reply.

"Mom must still be out with Aunt Karui. Guess I'll have to fix us some lunch. Man, this is such drag." Shikadai complained as he entered the kitchen, Mira and Mikoto following after they took of their shoes.

He wasn't trying to do anything crazy, just chop up some fruits and vegetables that Mom had laying around. The hand that wrapped itself around his wrist brought him out of his dreamlike state. Oh, would you look at that, he almost lost a finger.

"How about I finish the chopping and you go lie down for a bit?" Mira suggested and Shikadai was too tired to argue. He barely made it into the living room before he collapsed on the sofa and passed out, face first into the cushions.

"Shikamaru, you lazy-ass!" Of course, it would be Mom's naggy, almost harpylike voice that would wake him up from his oh so lovely nap. Thanks a lot, Mom, troublesome woman.

"You should have warned me that we were having guests! Just a simple message like I don't know, Oh Temari, the Hokage has order our son to house these girls for an unknown amount of time, just to give you the heads-up!" Yep, she was pissed. Shikadai sat up, to see his mom giving down a good-scolding to Dad in the kitchen while Mira and Motoko sat at the living room table, Mira playing with _his_ shogi board and Motoko watching.

"Oh, hey Dai, welcome back to the land of the living. Sorry I didn't ask you if I could use your shogi board but Lord Nara said it was cool." Mira stated with a smile before turning back to the board. It was weird to hear anyone call his dad Lord Nara, let alone this girl. And did she just give him a nickname? She was an odd one. How troublesome.

"I didn't even have time to clean this place! What'll our guests think if they'll saw our home as messy as it was?!" Come on, Mom. The only thing that looked dirty when he walked in were the dishes in the sink.

"That's we're busy people." That got Dad a smack on the head.

"Ugh, you are unbelievable. Girls, dinner's ready. Shikadai, you better not have drooled on that sofa, young man!" He flinched and sighed in relief that he didn't drool this time. Not that he ever drooled! Well, maybe a little?

"Shikadai!"

"Coming, Mom." Ugh, why couldn't he still be asleep? Now he had to do stuff. Mom had dinner set up in the formal dinning room so that they could fit the two guests. Dad was already there, nursing a cup of sake, trying to rub away the big bump on the make of his head. Mira sat Motoko down next to Dad, before frowning and walking over to the kitchen.

"Lady Nara, do you need help setting the table or getting the food?" The blue-eyed girl asked and it was only then that Shikadai noticed Mom had only brought out three plates of food with chopsticks. His stomach grumbled loudly as the realization hit him that him and Dad were in the doghouse again. Mom must have seen the flowers and Dad must have really pissed her off with his sarcasm. Whatever, he'll just have to sneak some food in later. Or he could just show up at Chocho's house with Dad and tell Uncle Chouji that he was hungry. That'll get him more food that he could ever eat.

"It's Temari, and no, I'm fine. Thank you though." Clearly, the girls had gotten on Mom's good side already. Mom entered the dining room and sat, Mira following suit with a frown. Mira and Mom started to eat. Little Motoko though, didn't.

Her face was adorable though, even if she was frowning up a storm. Her arms were crossed, her brows furrowed and her eyes dark. She glared at her plate, then Mom, then back down at the plate.

"Mira," Her soft voice made everyone stop whatever they were doing to look at the little girl. It was then at Shikadai realized that was the first time he ever heard her speak.

"Yes, Momo?" Her sister asked back with confusion. "Is something wrong? Lady Nara made you seaweed salad with salmon, your favorite." Shikadai felt a sense of dread fill him when the little girl turned her glare back onto his mom and it harden. Mom seemed to tense while Dad watched, now intrigued by this turn of events, his sake laying forgotten on the table.

"Not everyone has food. We shouldn't eat until everyone's got food. Mommy said so."

You could've cut the tension with a kunai; the air was so thick. No one had ever had the balls to question his mother when her mind was set. Not her brothers, not her son and certainly not her husband. But here was a little girl, so tiny that she barely came up to his waist, glaring down his Suna mother and saying that her decision was wrong. Mira, trying to ease the tension, patted her head before nodding in agreement.

"You're right, Motoko, we shouldn't eat until everyone's got food. How about you and I share with Lord Nara and Dai can share with his mom? Maybe later we can get Dai to show us the best place to get dango? How does that sound?" The little one nodded in agreement before giving her entire plate of food to Dad. It seemed that Motoko decided that she would be sharing Mira's plate so that Dad could have a full one instead. The four-year-old marched out of the dining room, found the chopsticks on her first try, and came back, handing one set to Dad and the other to him.

"Thank you, Motoko." Dad said quietly to little one, though you could clearly tell that he was pleased with the changing events. And the girl smiled as brightly as a star before lifting her arms to him. The command, 'pick me up' was loud and clear even though no words were said. He looked at Mira, who nodded with a pleased smirk/smile on her face, before lifting the child. Motoko seemed entirely at home as tucked herself into Dad's shoulder. They looked so much like the pictures that Mom used to take of him and Dad when Dad used to nap with Shikadai cradled on his chest. He should feel jealous, but oddly, he wasn't, because this turn of events was fitting. Motoko, looking more pleased and mischievous than any four-year-old he's ever seen, bore her eyes into Mom.

"No one should ever go to bed hungry." Mom didn't talk for the rest of the night and it was beautiful. _Forgot what I thought earlier, they were the worst kind of troublesome._

 **Author's Note- They're not even in Canon Konoha for a day and Mira and the gang have completely turned the place upside down! The Uzumakis would be so proud! Now do you guys get what I was hinting at in the first author's note? Mira and crew come from a world extremely similar to this one and instead of just going along and keeping their heads down, they say screw this, and cause as much mischief as possible! Which begs the question, have Mama and Papa Bear noticed that their babies are missing? You'll just have to wait and see! Love you guys and remember to review, favorite, and follow! See you guys next time!**

 **-V. I. Winthrop**


	3. Don't Waste Money, Boruto

**Author's Note - Man, I'm on a roll. The ideas just keep flowing out and I must type! It's actually kinda scary... Oh well! Anyway, want to see what happens when two Uzumaki, teenage boys have to be around each other for a long period of time? Hilarity and jealousy, that's what! Also, I think you guys are going to love the one-liners that Beni and Inojin spill out every time they show up! Also, I wrote in a little something, something in the middle of the chapter! Hope you guys like it! On to the story!**

Chapter 3: Don't Waste Money, Boruto

 _Takashi_

"So, are you and Mira like, dating or something?"

It was questions like that that made Takashi want to curse Mom for her great beauty. Then curse her again for blessing her daughters with it. Ever since Mira graduated the academy, every guy she met that didn't know that her mama was the Hokage or that her daddy was the Jonin Commander would ask these questions to _him!_ Oh no, not to her, because she was scary. But to him because these idiots couldn't put two and two together. They failed at figuring out that, shit, that's not her boyfriend. No, he was _her twin brother_. Normally, his deadpanned and sharp toned 'I'm her twin' sent whoever asked packing but since he couldn't actually say that…

"No." Yep, short, sweet and to the point.

"Taka and Mira? Together? Ew!" Leave it to Benihime to articulate a perfect response to that ludicrous question. Really, people only see the hair and think, oh those two can't possibly be twins. Idiots, he was surrounded by idiots. Except for Beni, of course.

"Ok, geeze, sorry I asked." Boruto said before inching away from the two other Uzumakis, Taka's frowning face making him appear stand-off ish. Yeah, he should probably be acting bubblier and smile and shit but he had Beni with him who was Uzumaki enough for the both of them. And judging by the place of the sun, yep, 3:30, time for his afternoon nap. He was still ticked off that he didn't get his 10:00 nap this morning when Grandma Yoshino busted into his room and dragged him outside to 'go help your sisters to feed the fawns, Takashi! Don't you dare say troublesome, young man! I swear, you are just as lazy as your father!' She really should know by now that call him lazy was actually a compliment.

Back to his 3:30 nap. He was going to have to miss it, again. Ugh, what a drag. What did he do in a past life to deserve this? Honestly, Taka doesn't ask for much. Just give him nap time and fuinjutsu and you got yourself one happy Chunin. Now he had neither, which sucked. _No wonder Dad used to envy clouds._

"-What, Ow! Get her off of me!" Boruto's screaming brought him out of his daydreaming to realize that Beni had left his back and jumped onto Boruto's. She was pulling his hair quite furiously for a seven-year-old and she looked pissed! Like her hair was forming nine hair tails pissed! Quickly, Taka snatched her up by the back of her collar. Boruto sighed in relief as he inched even further away from the mini she-fox.

"Let me go! Let me at'him!" She was still kicking and trying to grab the other boy. Taka leveled a glare at Boruto.

"What did you do?" He asked even though he really didn't want to know the answer.

"Nothing! Why does everyone keep blaming me for stuff? I was just talking and she attacked me, the little demon."

Oh, oh that was the wrong word to say in front of Takashi Nara Uzumaki. You see, unless you are scared from a nightmare and telling Mommy and Daddy that there are demons under your bed who want eat a baby Kurama and kidnap Mr. Fluffy the Deer ( _cough, Beni and Motoko, cough_ ), the word demon isn't utter in the Nara compound and certainly not in front of Lord Nara or any of his children.

Dad's genin team, Team 4, had once told Mira and Taka about their first C-Rank. Naturally, something went wrong and they were surrounded and everything looked bleak. Then the leader, who had been a civilian-born missing-nin from Konoha, figured out who Dad was and who he was married to. As the story goes, Dad single-handedly strangled 20 missing-nin with his shadow before spearing the rest for calling Mom, quote, 'Konoha's Demon Whore.' In a span of one minute. Retsu said that they've never seen Dad so angry and so terrifying in their entire lives. Kaien and Daisuke didn't act up for a straight three weeks because they didn't want to trigger 'The Shadow Man'. Duh, duh, DUH!

Since Taka couldn't show Boruto a reenactment of C-Rank Gone Wrong #342, he lifted Beni so that she was eye-level with him before saying as honestly as possible,

"You should have hit him below the belt."

…Aunt Hinata? Mom's male-self bagged Aunt Hinata to be his wife?! Dah Hell?! Thankfully, Taka kept his mouth from dropping because this was freaking him the fuck out. How in the- you know what, Taka didn't even want to know how this union occurred nor could he fathom why she was a housewife.

Aunt Hinata was awesome. She was an absolute cinnamon roll who need to be protected at all cost from those who wished to even dare harm such an angel on earth (these were Mom's words, not his but the statement still stands!) Not that Aunt Hinata needed protection, seeing as she was a kick-ass kunoichi, the Head of the Hyuga Clan and had the best bodyguards ever in the form of her husband and Akamaru.

But this Aunt Hinata, wore cargo shorts and a hoodie. The least Taka's ever seen her wear was a yukata and that was after she gave birth to Kenji's little sister, Hisana. Nope, this was wrong. This dimension was seriously fucked up if they had Hinata Hyuga, The Ender of the Bird Cage Seal and The Bridge of the Hyuga Clan, as the 7th Hokage's housewife. And no, Taka was by no means a feminist (he shuttered at the horror of the idea) but even he was angered that this inspirational woman had become this domesticated copycat.

"Oh, your hair is really pretty!" Thank the deities for Beni and all-powerful Talk no Jutsu. "Hi, I'm Benihime Uzumaki, but you can call me Beni! This is my big brother, Takashi! What's your name?"

"Oh, I'm Hinata Uzu- wait, did you just say Uzumaki?" Aunt Hinata asked, her white eyes even wider than usual as a whiskered mini-me with blue eyes popped out from behind her.

"Surprise, Mom." Boruto faked shock before reaching out and patting the blue-haired chipmunk. "Sup, Hima. Mom, what's for lunch? I'm starving." (Boruto must not have realized that it was way too late for lunch and far closer to dinner time.) He tried to circle past his mom when her hand caught the back of his collar. Taka and Beni tried to stifle their chuckles as the other blonde choked and spattered about. A red glow of evil thoughts surrounded Aunt Hinata's body, which was as comforting as it was scary.

"Everyone, living room, now! Boruto, what did you do?"

"Nothing! God! Why is everyone always blaming me for shit? Ow! Mom!"

"Boruto said a bad word! Boruto said a bad word!"

"Oh shut up, Hima!" _Man, these guys are troublesome. I wonder if Mom and Dad know that we're missing._

 **Meanwhile: In Konoha 2.0**

 _Sarada_

It was a peaceful day in Konoha 2.0 (which shall be known as 2.0 from now on.) The ninjas were training, the civilians were shopping, the genin were failing to catch Tora. All was right in the vill-

"What do you mean my children are missing?" Ok, so all was not right in the village as the remainder of the Konoha 12 plus their offspring and their senseis squeezed into the Lady Hokage's office. Aunt Naruto and Uncle Shikamaru were the furthest thing from happy that Sarada's ever seen and they were terrifying.

Aunt Naruto was naturally a loud woman. She talked a lot, was optimistic about everything, and had a mischievous side twice the size of Konoha. She was funny, sometimes slow to anger (depending on the situation) and a whole lot smarter than everyone gave her credit for. But when someone upsets her and her family, she didn't get upset, she gets even.

So, Aunt Naruto being this quiet was absolutely terrifying. Her question had been spoken softly, as if she didn't hear the statement properly. Her eyes were closed and her smile was frighteningly beautiful. But what was really making the four genin (and near everyone else in the office) quaking with fear, was the suffocating amount of killing intent that was leaking out her like a waterfall. No, Aunt Naruto wasn't pissed. She was beyond that a long time ago!

"We said Taka and the girls are gone." Mark Sarada's words, Inojin's lack of a filter was going to get him killed one day.

"Gone?" Aunt Naruto parroted softly. Uncle Shikamaru, who was as upset as his wife, stood behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders, wrinkling her Hokage cape. Her left hand shot up to lace her fingers with his. Her right hand was fisted tightly on the arm of her chair.

"Gone, as in vanished, missing, disappeared… I'm going to shut up now." Yeah, you do that, Inojin. Only Inojin could piss off the Hokage and her Commander in a time like this and still live to see another day.

"So, now what?" Kenji broke the tense silence, his dog, Hyorinmaru, barking in agreement from his spot on his master's head.

Tick, tock, tick.

Chaos ensued.

"Should I go sniff them out?"

"My beetles cannot sense them, why, I do not know."

"Inojin, link minds with me this instant!"

"Alright, let's just all calm-"

"OH, MY LOYAL AND DEPEDICATED STUDENTS HAVE GONE MISSING IN THE MOST UNYOUTHFUL WAY! METAL, IF WE CAN NOT FIND THEM, WE SHALL DO-"

The sound of metal shattering had sound off the walls as the room completely blacken, encased by pitch black shadows. As quickly as they came, the shadows receded back to Uncle Shikamaru. Distracted by the shouting match, Sarada failed to notice that the couple were standing. At their feet was Aunt Naruto's metal desk, made of the newest shinobi-proof technology so that it could with stand any beating. But Aunt Naruto wasn't your average shinobi and the desk shattered faster then Sarada could physically blink.

Uncle Shikamaru had put his back to the large group, shielding his wife from view as he whispered softly to her. What he was saying, Sarada couldn't tell. Aunt Naruto's hands, which had fisted tightly into the back of his vest to stop them from shaking, loosened their grip. Even with his back to her, Sarada could tell that Uncle Shikamaru that he had leaned down to kiss his wife. And if they embraced for a little longer than normal, no one commented. They needed a moment.

"We'll get them back. They're our kids. Most importantly, they're your babies. The twins are probably wreaking havoc as we speak with Benihime and Motoko spearheading the operation." That got a watery laugh out of Aunt Naruto. "They'll be fine." With that, he wiped the rest of her tears away and moved to his normal spot, right by her side. She sniffed once before straightening up. Their Hokage was back.

"Right, Team 10, report! What was the seal that Chunin Uzumaki was investigating?" The Lady Hokage ordered and everyone's back straightened. Inojin and Chocho stepped forward and bowed.

"Ma'am, we believe that it was a combination between an Uzumaki circle and the Flying Thunder God seal!" Chocho reported out quickly. _Please forgive me, Mira, but I've got to squeal on you._

"It was Chunin Nara's idea, Ma'am." The adults all turned to look at Sarada but she stood tall. Kenji and the others looked at her like she's lost her marbles, though.

"Genin Uchiha?" The Lady Seventh asked, urging her to continue.

"Ma'am, Chunin Nara had made a bet with Chunin Uzumaki to see who could create a signature move first. Chunin Nara wanted to create a new attack with her lightning and yin release while Chunin Uzumaki wanted to see if combination the Flying Thunder God seal with an Uzumaki circle could enhance its speed and teleportation capabilities." Silence. Aunt Naruto and Uncle Shikamaru locked eyes, the message 'They are in so much trouble!' rang as clear as day.

"Lazy Husband?"

"Yes, Troublesome Wife?"

"Remind me to have the twins on both deer patrol and gate patrol for the next, I don't know, six-months."

"Of course, might I suggest adding a few unsavory D-Ranks in as well?"

"Oh, great idea, I knew there was a reason I kept you around. Let's go find our kids." _Damn! Oops. Sorry guys._

"Oh, and Teams 7 and 10, thank you for volunteering yourselves in helping your squad leaders with their D-Ranks." _Ah, fuck._ _She knows!_ As the two teams left the office building, Sarada felt their stares.

"What?" She asked and turned to face their shocked expressions. Kenji stepped forward, with Chocho and Inojin looking on.

"You know, I think I speak for everyone when I say, I can't believe you, Sarada Uchiha, did something to get _Takashi_ in trouble!" She felt her cheeks redden as she glared at her annoying friends.

"For the last time, I don't have a crush on Takashi!"

 **To Konoha 1.0**

 _Boruto_

It should be illegal to be blamed for the amount of shit that people blame him for today. Like, seriously, you cheat one time in the final match of the Chunin Exams and everyone automatically thinks you're the bad guy. _Hello! Shinobi! Cheating is kinda in the name!_

Whatever. Back to the situation at hand. Mom was handling the new Uzumakis better than he thought. After seeing the 'Really Scary Glow of Doom!' (Duh, duh, DUH!), Boruto was sure that he wasn't going to live to see dinner. Luckily, the redette, Benihime, charmed Mom with her endless smiles and unstoppable talking. Man, does the kid even breathe between sentences?

"And that's why we're here! Thank you for having us!" Beni finished with a huge grin, the gold in her eyes shining. She sat on her brother's knees as he reclined back on the sofa, his arms crossed against his chest. Takashi was silent through most of the conversation, interrupting only when Beni got too of track. Himawari, who was between him and Mom on the other sofa, looked excited. Almost too excited, like so excited that Boruto should sleep with one eye open, excited.

"Wow! You know fuinjutsu?" Hima asked Taka, so nodded back stoically. "Can you teach me?!"

What?! What is this?! This guy isn't even here a day and _his little sister_ wants to taking sealing lessons from him?! Oh, that is so unfair!

"You should probably ask Lord Hokage first." Taka said back, actually cracking a smile. Ugh, Boruto hated it when other people reminded him that his dad was the Hokage. And seeing how formal this guy was, he was going to be hearing it a lot. Great…

"Well, now that that's all settled, how about I make us a snack before dinner? Any requests?" Mom asked politely, her soft smile back on her face.

"Ramen!" Yep, Beni was your stereotypical Uzumaki. But then her brother's hand covered her mouth gently and he scolded,

"It's not Friday and you've already convinced Lord Sixth to get you some tomorrow. What would Mom say if she found out you had more ramen then you should?"

"Good job?"

"…Ok, good point. What would Dad say?"

"Ok, never mind. Can I have miso instead?" Beni asked Mom again, who nodded back and headed back to the kitchen. After she left, Hima looked to Beni and asked,

"Do you want to play?"

"Yeah! Let's go!" Boruto blinked and the girls were already gone. For some reason, he felt that there was an unholy disturbance in the universe. That can't be good.

"Well," Taka yawned. "now that Beni's occupied, I can nap in peace."

"Nap? Dude, you sure you're an Uzumaki?"

"Yep."

"We don't nap."

"Says you. My mom naps every afternoon if she can. Now be quiet, you're loud." And with that, Taka fully reclined back on the couch, his head pillowed in his folded arms and was out like a light. Well that's just plain rude.

 _He should know better than to fall asleep on a Uzumaki_. A mischievous smile spread across Boruto's face. He inched closer, the black object firmly in his hand. He hovered over Taka's face, arm raised when-

"Permanent marker? Dude, you need to do better than that if you're going to ink someone's face." Taka commented with one eye open, his hand holding Boruto's wrist with the pen. He moved fast, Boruto realized. For a guy almost as lazy as Shikadai, this guy was quick.

"How did you-"

"You've met my sister. She's an evil genius when it comes to pranks. No one's safe. Except for Grandma and Granny but they're vicious." Taka's sarcastic words made Boruto pale drastically. Had he really just left Hima alone with a prank genius? Oh no...

"Do you need something or can I go back to sleep now?"

"I-"

"Boruto! Get out here now!" Oh, Sarada found him. Perfect timing!

"Come on, you can meet my teammate." Boruto tried to come off as 'I already knew she was there' but Taka's eyeroll showed how much he believed it. Tch, dick. Boruto opened the door to find Sarada waiting on the step, her foot tapping impatiently. She glared at him through her lenses. Great, what did he do now?

"You forgot this." Sarada said, chucking his Kote at him. There it was, the reason he lost the Chunin Exams. And it was empty. He must have left it at Shikadai's house.

"I shouldn't even be giving this back to you, but I'm…" Sarada started but trailed off. She was staring over his shoulder. Boruto turned to look and there was Taka. He was- holding the Kote! Yep, the guy had snatched the Kote out of his hand without him even noticing. Just how fast was this guy?

"Hey! Give that back!" Boruto yelled as he tried to jump the other blonde.

Ow! Boruto sat up, rubbing his sore chin and turned to glare at Taka. He stood in the front yard now with the Kote still in his grasp. Sarada was staring at Taka full on now, her jaw dropped.

Taka held the tool up with one hand, letting the light reflect it. He turned it and flipped it over. There was scowl on his face. Then, he broke it!

"Dude, you broke it!" Boruto yelled as he charged at him, eyes closed from fury. Something pressed against his head and it felt like he was running in place. And he was, because Taka had reached out with his left hand and was pushing Boruto back without breaking a sweat.

"Calm down, I didn't break it. I'm looking at the inner workings of this thing." And yeah, it's true, it wasn't broken. Taka had just taken of the huge screw like lens. He was like a watchmaker, the way he was examining the tool's machinery.

"It's like a cheap cope out of fuinjutsu!" Taka determined as he picked at it, having let go of Boruto. Sarada had walked over to get view as Taka sat and laid the tool in front of him.

"The chamber works as a chakra reactor. Once the scroll is in place, the user needs to focus his chakra into his forearm. That hits the reader in the armband, which triggers the chamber to activate the scroll, releasing whatever jutsu you had sorted in it." …Amazing, he only looked at it for what, a minute, and he already understood the tool as well as the manufacture.

"Tsk, what a waste of money." Taka exclaimed before tossing the repaired Kote over his shoulder. His aim was impressive, because it landed in the conveniently open trashcan.

"Ah!" And naturally, Boruto dove after it and found out that what three-day old eggs smelled and tasted like.

"Bah! Gross! What the hell, man? That's my Kote!" Boruto snarled. Normally, when he did that people flinched back. But this guy, he stared back at him with a 'Really, that all you got?' stare and rolled his eyes.

"You're an Uzumaki. You don't need that thing. Now, if you could repeatedly use the jutsu in the scroll over and over again, then knock yourself out. But that gadget is a one trick pony. It isn't something you should be wasting your money on. Use your fuinjutsu." Taka stated firmly as he stood up, brushing the dirt off his pants. He was about to turn back to the house, hands stuffed in his pockets when Boruto snapped back,

"Don't have any." Taka froze before turning back to face him. Boruto tightened his grip on the Kote but had to smirk. It was nice to get one over on the smartass.

"Really?" Taka questioned, his eyes narrow again. Sarada, man, she was still there? Sarada coughed dramatically, getting their attention.

"Boruto doesn't know fuinjutsu. He specializes firmly in ninjutsu." Sarada explained. Taka nodded before holding out his right hand to her.

"Takashi Uzumaki." She looked shocked, her eyes flickering between the two blondes, before finding her nerve. She shook his hand.

"Sarada Uchiha, please to meet you, Takashi." Was that? It was! She was blushing! No, Sarada! Not you too! Boruto was really starting to hate this guy.

"Call me Taka. You too, Boruto."

"Boruto, why is the door- Oh, hello, Sarada." Mom called from the open door.

"Hello, Auntie, how are you?"

"I'm good, thank you for asking. Sarada, would you like to join us? I just finished making miso."

"No, thank you, I got go home for dinner. I'll see you tomorrow, Boruto. Don't be late for practice this time." Hay! "Nice meeting you, Taka." And with that, she was off. Taka stared after her, watching as she disappeared down the street before he smirked.

Boruto narrowed his eyes as the guy walked into the house. There was something about this guy that just wasn't still right. But what?

 **Author's Note - So, what do you guys think? BoruSara or TakaSara? (And which version of Sarada? Decisions, decisions.) Or how about nothing but cheeky humor because, you know, they're twelve... I mean seriously, unless you have the patience of Sakura or are my version of Naruto and Shikamaru (aka, completely perfect for one another and it took them** ** _forever_** **to get together) crushes fade and die. Well, I guess I should let you guys comment on what you guys want! I may even write it! But you'll never know unless you review! So, review, favorite and follow! Thanks guys, love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V. I. Winthrop**


	4. The Not So Lazy Clan

**Author's Note- Hey Guys! It's almost Christmas! I'm so excited! But enough about that! I've got a new chapter for you guys! So, a few things before you start reading. First, I'm going to start exploring the mysteries of the Nara clan (or creating my own, however you like to interpret it). As a result, I kind of took an idea for** _ **Deja Vu no Jutsu**_ **to add some more background to the clan. Sorry if it seems like I'm stealing but I'm a little jealous that I didn't think of the idea first. Still, I'm going to give credit where credit is due. Now, my idea ties into my second thing. I'm adding an under-layering of tension between Canon Shikamaru and Temari to add drama. (Please note that ShikaTema was and still is one of my favorite ships especially in Canon but this my story so...yeah) Finally, for all of you that are think, man, Mira and Taka are doing just fine. Haha, no. Just read the chapter to see why. Right, that should be it. On to the story!**

Chapter 4: The Not So Lazy Clan

 _Mira_

The crack of dawn, hell, it was even earlier than that. That was the time that Mira and Motoko woke up in order to train. Yes, you heard correctly. Two Naras willingly lost sleep to train. The end of the world was occurring!

Ok, the end of the world was not occurring. There was a reason Naras were so lazy and always tired. They used yin chakra and lots of it. The entire clan lived and thrived in the shadows, surrounded in the comforting embraced of darkness. Naturally, that meant Naras had to practice when their shadows/darkness were their most potent. At 3:30 to 4:00 in the morning. Which freaking sucked. Now do you see why the clan liked to nap so much.

Mira wasn't like most Naras. She's known this since _forever_ , and quite frankly, the clan was cool with it so she's never really cared. But she couldn't nap. Ever.

She could sleep just fine. She was an extremely heavy sleeper at home too (something that Taka's used against her before, the bastard). Missions were different, but that's another story. Anyway, at a minimum, Mira needed a solid six hours of sleep before she could function properly. And if she didn't get it, it was ugly (something else that Taka can attest to).

Motoko was getting used to the new training/sleep schedule. But seeing as she was practically still a baby, Mira was going to let her stop and sleep once they went through the proper katas. So, there they were, two dimension-hopping sisters up before the crack of dawn, in a training field that's clearly seen better days. _No wonder Dad built Mom the underground one._

As she fixed Motoko's stance, Mira could feel the separation anxiety creeping into her exhausted body. After dinner, Dai had brought Mira to the guest room while Not Dad followed lazily, Motoko tucked carefully against him. A guest room that should have been Taka's bedroom. And no matter how familiar the compound, hell, even the room felt, Mira didn't sleep a wink.

Mira missed Mom and Dad. A lot. She missed seeing Mom smile as Beni rambled on and on about her day. She missed seeing Dad smirk with pride as Taka and Mira avoided an pranked his newbies, showing the jonins that their newbs needed to step up their game. She missed the many snippets of romantic moments that her parents did every night without fail, even if they didn't think she noticed. Like Mom always leaning close or touching Dad, just to assure herself that he was there and safe. Or when Dad got that look in his eyes, when he stared at Mom. They were warm, full of love, staring at Mom as if she was the most beautiful woman on earth and that she was his only reason for being the man that he was (which was all true).

She missed her twin. She really missed Taka and she needed to make sure that he and Beni were ok and fed because god knows that if she wasn't there, Taka would never eat and Beni needed to have her hair brushed and-

Stop, she had to stop that train of thoughts before she could convince herself that breaking into the Hokage's house was a good idea. It wasn't but that's never stop her before- No, bad idea. She'll find him after breakfast. Or he'll find her. Whichever came first.

"You two are up early." Mira felt herself jump as she turned to look at Not Dad. She may or may not have flung a kunai at him but he dodged it with easy. She blushed before bowing deeply.

"I'm sorry, sir." She apologized, her head still bowed. Mira only raised her head when she felt a hand ruffle her chocolate hair, ruining her already messy bun. She raised her eyes to meet Not Dad's smile.

"No harm done. And stop with the sir. It's Shikamaru. Ok?" He spoke softly. _Yeah, not happening._ She nodded, not trusting her words.

She wanted to scream at him, because no, it was not ok. And she didn't care how pathetic she sounded right now but she really wanted her Daddy. She wanted her Daddy, who played late night shogi with her when her nightmares wouldn't let her rest. She wanted her Daddy, who kissed her forehead before he woke her up for training every day. She wanted her Daddy, who glared at any boy who dared look at _his_ eldest baby girl in anything at wasn't platonic.

This world was mocking her. No, the gods were mocking her. Here was a man that was and wasn't her Daddy and it was awful. If Mira was having such a hard time with this, poor Motoko must be absolutely miserable. Motoko clung to Dad. He was her favorite person in the world. If she could, Motoko could spend the entire day with Dad.

One time, Motoko ate breakfast and asked Dad to carry her to Grandma Yoshino's. When they got there, she refused to let go and would cry and shriek when he put her down (which was _extremely_ unlike her). That day, Dad went through his meetings, his reports, and his supervising while carrying Little Momo in his arms. Uncle Kiba teased him for two weeks until Hisana did the same thing. For four days.

So, was Mira shocked when Motoko raised her arms up to Not Dad, a cute pout on her lips? No, she wasn't. Mira should've been concerned that Motoko would get attached, but Motoko explained herself last night as she cuddled into Mira. They were sharing a bed and Mira asked her sister why she had spoke up at dinner. Motoko had answered,

 _"_ _He's not Daddy. I know that. But he is Daddy too. And no one does that to my Daddy. I need to do something for this Daddy. Mommy wouldn't be happy if she found out that we didn't help. Right, Mira?" Mira remembers looking up at the ceiling that should have been sky blue instead of moss green. She remembers blinking away tears before she peppered kisses into Motoko's hair._

 _"_ _Right."_

"You sure like to be held." Not Dad commented with a slight smile as he lifted Motoko. She curled against him, a smile on her lips too. "Is she always like this?"

"Always." Mira smiled back before turning to the bench for some water. Not Dad sat next to her. They sat there, looking up at the stars. If this was her dad, her head would've already have been on his free shoulder. But he wasn't, so she did nothing.

"You're from the main family." He stated firmly.

"My father is." Again, not a lie but not the full truth. Only the main family got up this early. The rest got up at 4:30 at the earliest. Mira could tell what Not Dad was doing. He was trying to build a timeline, to figure out where in the (inexistent) future they were from. He'd figure out what she was doing eventually. Until then, her pieces were set.

"The Lady isn't joining us? Or Shikadai?" Mira had originally asked this question to change the subject but she was curious as to why Temari wasn't here too. The man yawned before answering,

"Shikadai will be here any minute now. Temari doesn't train with us." Even Motoko sat up to look at him in shock. That woman was the Lady Nara and she didn't do the traditional training?... Oh man, that can't be good for the Suna woman's standing with the clan. Not Dad just shrugged, but his eyes were hard. Obviously, he knew the image this wife was presenting before the clan.

Now, the Nara clan was laid-back and lost its most archaic rules a _long_ time ago because they were too troublesome. But the traditions that they did keep, the clan took seriously. And the early morning training could be argued as the most important. Hell, even if she couldn't use the shadows, she needed to know the Nara katas so that she could teach her future offspring.

"Does she-"

"No." Not Dad cut her off. "Not one kata. She's picked it up off handedly when she spars with Shikadai and I but…" He shrugged again. Motoko, sensing his stress, squeezed his neck before giving him a baby peck on the cheek. Not Dad looked down at the child in shock, before looking at Mira too.

Mira didn't care that the man appeared stressed or that his only child was Dai. He needed hers and Motoko's love too. So, she gave in and her head rested against the man's shoulder.

"I'm sorry. We won't cause you any extra trouble. We promise." His eyes softened before he quickly squeezed Mira's shoulder before standing carefully. He placed Motoko on the bench and gave her the blanket that was tucked under it. Motoko's eye lit up at the sight of the familiar blanket. Dad's baby blanket. The one that he used to snuggle with when he was her age. The one back at home went through all of the siblings and Dai must have used it too.

"Alright," Not Dad turned to Mira, a smirk on his face. "Let's see what you got." She didn't try to stop the large smile that lit up her face.

"Right!"

After an extremely tense and awkward breakfast, Temari really didn't like Motoko now, Dai led the girls out the compound to Training Field 7, where he and his friends trained. He looked much better today now that he got some sleep. However, he looked both confused and petrified as he carried Motoko. The lazy baby had turned to Dai the moment they were out of the compound, her arms raised.

"You aren't going to drop her, you know." Mira chuckled. "She's like a monkey. Momo the Monkey, right, Momo?" She laughed when Motoko gave her a baby glare before resuming her cuddling. Dai chuckled too. She could tell, Motoko had him and Not Dad wrapped around her pinky finger already.

"You guys are adjusting well." Dai commented. The comment made Mira pause before she shrugged.

"I guess." She replied. "It helps that your dad reminds us of our dad." Dai nodded in understanding before forging ahead.

"Besides, you're family." Mira continued before she could stop herself. But he was family and so was Not Dad and to Mira, family meant everything. Dai froze before turning back to look at her. She lowered her sapphire eyes to the ground before raising them to meet his teal ones. _Can't back down now._

"One day and you already think of us as family?" He questioned, his eyes narrowing. He looked so much like Taka right now, that it hurt. But she nodded, and Motoko did too. He looked between the sisters, his mind turning.

"You girls are troublesome, you know that?" Dai stated after a moment before he cracked a smile. "You sure you want to be family? My mom's a little troublesome."

"We can handle it. Right, Motoko?"

"Right!"

 _Taka_

"961, 962, 963…" Taka muttered under his breath as he did his push-ups, Beni mediating in the lotus position on his back. It was about 5:00 in the morning and they were in the Hokage's backyard. Even in a different dimension, the Nara traditions must be upheld. Mom would know if he didn't do it anyway. She always knew, which sucked because he could never sleep in. Oh well, it's not like he slept at all last night.

After a tense, Hokage-less dinner last night, Aunt Hinata had offered Taka a sperate guest room from Beni. Thankfully, he didn't have to reject the room when Beni used her Talk no Jutsu to explain that 'Taka needs to be with me because there are monsters under the bed and in the closet and its really dark and scary and Taka will keep me safe and I don't have Mr. Fluffy with me and…" And this continued for a solid two minutes. Thus, Taka got a kicking and life squeezing bedmate until they got home. Which was for the best because he would have snuck into Beni's guest room to keep watch if they weren't together.

And yes, he was feeling the separation anxiety from Mira. They were twins and it was hard to be away from someone who you've spent your entire life with. This always happened whenever they went on missions. Most days, it was easy to push back. Most days. On really bad days, it wasn't Mom that the twins searched for when they returned, it was each other. Their teams understood and it was a pure coincidence if one team decided to train next to the gate on the return dates of the other team. But he had faith in Mira and knew that her and Motoko would be just fine. He'll find them later anyway.

They had gone through their katas as quickly as possible. The last thing they need was to be questioned on why they know the Nara katas. Then, they briefly worked on their (super pathetic, in Taka's opinion) Shadow Possession Jutsu. Mira was definitely the best of the siblings when it came to using the shadows which was fine with Taka. She couldn't seal worth shit and her creativity was even more pathetic than his Shadow Possession Jutsu. But at least she knew the basics of sealing ( _cough Boruto cough)_.

"And I thought I got up early." A tenor voice spoke out. Taka nearly jumped out of his push-up but stopped himself. Beni would've killed him if he dropped her. Again.

Taka looked back towards the house. There was the Lord Hokage, wearing shinobi pants and an orange t-shirt. Looks like he was going to train now too. At least Mom's male-self still trained. Taka was a little worried when he saw all of the paperwork and when he returned late last night.

"Good morning, Lord Seventh. Beni!" Holding his body in place with one hand, Taka reached back to snap his fingers next to her. She woke from her mediation and look back at Taka. He tilted his head towards the man.

"Greet the Lord Hokage." His sister nodded before leaping off of his back. She faced the man, who was as curious as he was confused. Beni bowed, her red locks shielding her face from view for a moment before she stood up. Her shoulders were back and her eyes strong as she met the Kage's gaze. She smiled brightly before her rambling spilled out.

"Good morning, sir! Did you sleep well? When did you get back? Where's your fancy cape? Is Miss Hinata up too? She's a great cook! Can she teach me-"

"Woah!" Seventh said, holding his hand up to stop her. "One at a time, Benihime. Drop the formalities, both of you." Yeah, not happening, "And yes, I did sleep well last night, thank you for asking. Now, why are you two up so early?"

 _1,000!_ With that, Taka pushed himself into a handstand before he righted himself. As he faced the man, Taka could see the similarities between the male and his mother. He had his left hand clocked on his hip and was leaning out to his left side, just like Mom when she was interested. His eyes had the same happy but hidden glow of wisdom to them. And he had Mom's small smile, the one that she got when she was trying not to be amused about something. Yes, Taka was a little weirded out by the whole situation but its actually kinda cool that he knows what Mom would have been like if she was a guy.

"My sensei insists that early morning training helps balance the chakra and the body." Which was true, Lee-Sensei did preach that. Taka may have removed a bunch of 'youthful' from the speech though. Besides, it's not like Taka could say that the Naras actually got up to train. That would completely ruin their image in the village!

"I see. Well maybe you two can rub a little bit of your work habit into my kids." The man joked before he waved them off. "You two go back to what you were doing. I'm going for a run."

"Would you like company?" Taka blurted out before he could stop himself. Mom was always his running partner. It was one of the reasons he was so fast. You try out running the fastest kunoichi in the world and not get faster. Beni had just started joining them three months ago and for her age, she was about as fast as a mid-chunin. The man paused and blinked at them. It was then that Taka realized that this was probably the first time in a long time that the Hokage's had someone who would willing train with him.

That's sad, like really sad. For shame, Boruto. If you really want get to know your parent, you got to train with them. Nothing says I love you like training the shit out of each other on a daily basis.

"Are you sure?" The siblings nodded. "I won't go easy on you."

"I can't do too many laps." Beni confessed. "Mommy doesn't let me." The last time Beni did too many laps she crashed for a solid 10 hours, which scared the living shit out of Mom.

"For good reason. Ten laps, that's it. Got it, Beni?" Taka ordered. She gave him a two-finger salute before turning back to Lord Seventh. He nodded in understanding before looking back at Taka.

"You sure you're up for it, Takashi?" Taka let an Uzumaki grin out for the first time since he's been here.

"Bring it, Old Man."

They were going to need more clothes, Taka realized as Boruto lead him and Beni walked to Training Ground 7. Taka had a few emergence mission packs sealed away. Poor Beni though, had nothing. Himawari was nice enough to offer her some clothes but most of it was pink. Beni never wore pink because it clashed with her hair. Thus, she was wearing one of Boruto's black shirts and Hima's tan shorts. Mira was going to kill him when she saw how poorly dressed she was. At least Aunt Hinata brushed Beni's hair today.

Speaking of Mira, Shikadai had messaged Boruto earlier to let him know that he was bringing Mira and Motoko with him to training and that he should probably bring his guests with him too.

"So, what's your team like?" Taka asked, trying to kill the awkward silence. Boruto had been in a pissy mood since dinner and Taka wasn't used to silence. Normally, him and Dad relished in any type of quiet they could get. Living with four girls meant that a quiet house was hard to come by. But this tension, nope, not happening today.

"They're cool." Boruto asked, easing up a little. "You met Sarada yesterday. She's the Brainiac. Just don't get her angry."

"Talking from experience?"

"Shut up." But that got Boruto to smile. You know, once you got him away from his dad, Boruto wasn't that bad of a kid.

"You'll probably meet Mitsuki today. He comes off as a little creepy but he's a nice guy. Trust me." Taka nodded, before his eyes drifted to the clouds. _So, Sarada seems almost exactly the same and so does Mitsuki. Chocho and Inojin looked the same yesterday too. The major difference is the clothing. And Sarada's glasses… Why she wearing them anyway?_

"Boruto, you're late!" Taka snapped out of his thoughts as Boruto got punched two feet under. A ticked off Sarada stood over him, her lenses flashing dangerously. _Scratch that,_ Taka sweat dropped, _She's exactly the same. Troublesome…_

"Oh, hello Taka, I didn't know you would be joining us today." Sarada stated before looking to the girl on his left. "Who's this?"

"Sarada, meet my little sister, Benihime. Beni, this is Sarada Uchiha, Boruto's teammate." Three, two, one-

"Hi, it's nice to meet you. Wow, your eyes are pretty. Why are you wearing glasses? Are you a kunoichi? And you're an Uchiha? Can you teach me a fireball jutsu? Please?!" Beni begged. The Sarada back at home knew better than to give into Beni's questions. This one though…

"Um, yes?" She asked more than stated but that was enough for Beni.

"Woah!" Beni exclaimed before she spotted another target. Mitsuki. She marched up to him, gave him a brief once over before stating,

"I think you're cool. Welcome to the team, Snake-Eyes!" Mitsuki blinked, notching his head to the side before he smiled,

"Happy to be aboard, Red-Robin." Yep, Mitsuki was still the same. All of this occurred with this world's Chocho and Inojin watching. They looked so lost. Taka was about to introduce himself to them when he felt a weight landed itself on his back. If it was anyone else, he would have dodged it.

"Good morning, little fawn. Where's Mira?" Taka whispered softly as Motoko poked her head out from behind his shoulder. Thankfully, she was smiling and perfectly fine. The child pointed her thumb behind her. There was his twin with Shikadai. The relief the flowed through the twins was almost palpable. She looked fine in her spare clothes. Her eyes were even lined with kohl, speaking of which, where in the hell did she find that anyway? Only her hair was different. It was in a bun instead of her standard braid. But that hardly mattered because his sisters were together and safe. He'll get them home. This, he swore.

"Ok, timeout!" Chocho shouted out of nowhere. "Who are you people?" Inojin nodded along furiously in agreement.

An overwhelming sense of deja vu over came Taka, Mira, Boruto and Shikadai as they all glanced at each other. The eye conversation went as followed

 _You do it!_

 _No, you do it!_ That was Shikadai and Boruto. This was his and Mira's.

 _Taka…_

 _Ok, fine!_

Troublesome, the whole lot of them. Taka stepped forward as Motoko returned to Mira's arms and Beni stood behind his legs.

"I'm Takashi Uzumaki-"

"What?!" _It's going to be a long morning. What a drag…_

After explaining their (mostly true) story, Boruto and Shikadai's teams were called away to perform some D-ranks. Giving the siblings some time before lunch to buy themselves some more clothes. Luckily, their money was still useable. As they walked to a new story, Mira started talking, the younger girls skipping happily ahead of them.

"Motoko made a scene yesterday." Wait, what?!

"Motoko? As in Silent Momo, made a scene?" Taka questioned. Mira nodded.

"Yep, long story short, Temari was upset at Dai and Not Dad. She decided that they shouldn't have dinner. Motoko wasn't happy and she made that well known. No one dares be mean to Motoko's daddy and gets away with it." Mira smirked out. There were so many things in that statement that he wanted to ponder. But the most important question came out.

"Not Dad?"

"What?" He continued to stare at her, completely unimpressed. "Oh, come on, Taka. It works. I can't call him Dad now, can I?"

"Ok, point. But man, Motoko's got balls." He wiped away an imaginary tear. "We trained her so well. Not even in the academy and she's already pissing off adults." That got Mira to laugh and couldn't help joining in.

"But are you ok?" Taka asked, because he knew his twin and she was upset. Mira flickered her cobalt eyes away towards the Hokage's tower, a faraway look entering them.

"It hurts, being around Not Dad. They're so similar. I'm afraid that I'll call him Dad if I'm not careful. You've got it easy. At least Guy Mom is a different gender." She explained. An awkward silence covered them for a moment before Taka asked,

"Guy Mom?" This time, Mira actually punched him.

"Like you can think of anything better, Mr. Creativity?"

"…"

"That's what I thought. Anyway, who's Boruto's mom anyway?" She asked. He smirked.

"I'll give you three guesses."

"Well, it's not Aunt Ino. This Sarada has a slightly bigger forehead so it's not Sakura Haruno, so… No! Really?" Leave it to Mira to get it in one guess.

"Yep."

"But, Aunt Hinata, really? What kind of fucked up dimension is this?"

"That's what I said."

"It explains so much though…"

"Yeah…"

They fell silent as Beni led them towards Ichiraku's for her lunch-date with Uncle Kakashi. Motoko had fallen back a bit, which made sense since her 3rd schedule nap was only ten minutes away. As he was scooping up a sleepy baby sister, he heard Mira grunt furiously.

"I can't remember…" Uh?

"What do you mean?"

"Your seal. I can't remember the reason for why the seal activated and its bugging the living shit out of me." Huh, well that's weird.

"Taka, Mira said a bad word again."

"Again, Motoko, not the time. Well, don't worry about it too much. I'm going to start doing some test runs this afternoon. And if all else fails, Mom will come up with some hairbrained idea that some how works." It was weird that he was being the optimistic one. This place must have been messing with them. Luckily, Mira wasn't too down to tease him.

"Maybe Mom finally found your seals diary in your underwear drawer."

"For the last time, it's not a diary!"

 **Author's Note - Well guys, what do you think? I think this is a good filler chapter before we get into the gritty bits. And yes, we are going to have action, an epic twins v. Boruto and Shikadai battle, and the Ino-Shika-Cho trio from Boruto will actually get some lines (Sorry guys, I tried but it didn't work well in this chapter, next one though)! But first, Beni has a lunch-date! I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible, but no promise. Review, favorite and follow. Love you guys! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	5. Beni's First Date

**Author's Note- Hey guys! So, we've got Beni lunch with Kakashi today so that'll be fun. But I'm going to explain some things to you guys. First, I'm sorry if the chapter seem a little repetitive. I'm trying really hard to keep my changing of POVs as natural and creative as possible but sometimes, things need to be repeated. Hopefully, next chapter we'll get some action but who knows. Second, I'm giving you guys two adult POVs which should be awesome. Third, if any of you guys think that Beni is a lot like Yachiru from Bleach, you would be correct because that's where I based her character from. Fourth... you know what, just read and find out. This note is getting way too long. On to the story!**

Chapter 5: Beni's First Date

 _Kakashi_

There was something about those kids that Kakashi couldn't put his finger on. Granted, they claimed that they were from the future so that was probably it. They were intriguing. When Kakashi was first alerted to their presence, he had been roof hopping to the tower. Naruto, while a good successor, still needed his help in juggling all of that accursed paperwork. Ugh, he shuttered at the horror of just thinking about. If only there was a way to make it manageable…

Anyway, he had arrived at the open window and listened in. The tale was fascinating and a little farfetched. Then again, given everything that's happened, Kakashi believed that anything was fucking possible… Still, it was the kids' reaction to Shikamaru that was really interesting. Naruto hadn't noticed (he was still a bit of an idiot, bless his heart), but Kakashi had.

The two little girls had mouthed something that began with a 'D'. With their faces tucked against their siblings, Kakashi could barely read their lips. The boy had tensed drastically while the eldest girl paled even more. However, the eldest children's eyes told a different story. They were laced with respect, love, loyalty, and- fear? Yes, there was definitely fear in their eyes.

All of this lasted for a second. Then Mira Nara and Takashi Uzumaki revealed just how good they really were. They removed those raw emotions and had the Hokage and his Advisor's trust quicker than you could say kunai. These kids were good. So good in fact, Kakashi wanted to pay whoever taught them to fix the past few graduating classes, especially Boruto's.

Now don't get Kakashi wrong, Boruto was Naruto's family so of course, that made Boruto his family too. But the kid had serious daddy issues that needed to be address yesterday. And the last few graduating classes were pathetic pussies who would never survive an actual war. Kakashi wasn't Danzo (May he burn in hell for the rest of eternity), but this isn't what Kakashi meant when he said 'Let's have peace through strength.' What would these kids do if an Akatsuki like group invaded the village?

... Yeah, it's not a pretty thought. Above all, Kakashi didn't want these kids to die because they were underprepared for the real world.

Back to the Time-Traveling Quartet. They seemed familiar, those kids. Like Kakashi's seen them before and that he should know them. God, this is going to bug the living shit out of him. Either way, Takashi had surprised him by addressing him correctly. Then, he was attacked by a mini tomato.

"Hi, I'm Benihime Uzumaki but you can call me Beni! What's your name? Are you actually Lord Sixth? Why are you wearing a mask? Can I see your face? How did you do that to your hair? Can you do that to mine?"

As the girl continued to ramble, Kakashi could only see Kushina. The woman who practically raised him with his sensei after Obito's (supposed) death and in his arms, was her reincarnation. Only her eyes were different. He tried to squash down the guilt that was building up in him but that failed miserably.

He had already apologized profusely to Naruto about it, but Kakashi would always feel guilty about not taking him in when he had turned 20, since single shinobis couldn't adopt until they were 20. After Sensei's death, Kakashi's ANBU life was his pathetic escape from the pain of losing everyone he had ever loved.

In the end, Kakashi was a coward and even worse than scum because he had abandon his little brother to hell. Sure, he had been apart of Naruto's ANBU but that's hardly enough to make up for the years of loneness and abuse that Naruto suffered.

So, Kakashi's whimper of 'There's two of them?' wasn't referring to the brother and sister but to Kushina and Beni. She was here to mock him, to make his guilt consume him. And when Beni demanded that they get ramen, he knew that he was going to give in even before she spoke. No one said no to Kushina and clearly, her mini-me was the same, even if her method had a hell of a lot less bodily harm.

But first, Naruto had called the Konoha Twelve together and the senseis for an early ass meeting. If Kakashi hadn't have known it was about the kids, he _so_ would've been at least 3-hours late. As irony would have it, he was the first to arrive. This had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Guy wanted to be there early and had him asked for some company, of course.

"Time-traveling children? How positively youthful!" Guy chirped from his wheelchair as Kakashi pushed him to his favorite window, Asuma's daughter following. It was out of respect of his old friend that he actually let Mirai do her job as his bodyguard. It's not like she was good company or anything.

"And two of them are Uzumakis?" Mirai asked. He nodded as the others slowly entered in. Kurenai, upon spotting her daughter with the other former senseis, moved to sit with them. Kakashi scanned the room. Choji sat next to Ino and Sai, eating a bag of chips while Ino chatted on about the lastly gossip. (Wait, Kotestu and Izumo were finally dating! Fuck, he owned Genma 100,000 ryos now.) Sai sketched Ten-Ten's kunai balancing act while Lee did handstand push-ups to pass the time. (It took the combined efforts of him, Mirai and Kurenai to get Guy to stay in his chair.) Sakura and Sasuke entered quietly with Hinata. All the while, Naruto sat at the desk, doing his never-ending paperwork. Then the office door slammed open, making everyone look towards it. An upset Shikamaru stalked in, a frown gracing his features. The Nara looked stressed and itching to fight as he maneuvered to himself to stand next to his old team. Ino and Choji shared a worried look.

"What's with Shika?" Mirai whispered to him. He shrugged as she continued, "I haven't seen him this upset set since Temari got into it with his mom." _Fuck, was that an awful day. Who knew two women who were so similar could hate each other so much._

"Alright!" Sakura shouted out, getting everyone's attention. "What's this about time-travelers?" Everyone turned to Naruto, even Hinata, who knew what was going on. Naruto sighed before starting,

"Yesterday, three girls and one boy showed up at my window. And they claimed that they are from the future." And the story telling commenced.

"Oh, the poor dears…" Kurenai whispered out when the room fell silent when the story ended.

"Takashi and Benihime are very sweet. Himawari hasn't stopped talking about Beni since they met." Hinata added helpfully.

"Ok, I get that they're kids but why the hell didn't you send them to me?" Ino asked, the hard look of the Head of T&I entering her eyes. "Two of them are genin but even genin can cause damage, Naruto." And if anyone was proof of that statement, it was Naruto himself.

"Maybe we should send the eldest to Ino…" Sasuke grunted in agreement as the muttering commenced.

"That's not happening." Everyone turned to look at Shikamaru. He wasn't looking at the group though. His eyes were locked with his teammates. His fists were clutched into tight fists and he met Ino's surprised but firm glare with an icy anger. The teammates stared down with Choji in between them, ready to grab either of them if they decided to start throwing punches.

"Why?" Ino questioned. "Give me a damn good reason as to why I shouldn't find the nearest one and probe them. We can't afford another threat to the village. You know this better than anyone, Shikamaru."

"The girls are from the main family." Kakashi admits, he was confused as to how and why that was important. So was everyone else in the room. But Team 10 changed. Choji's face lightened up as a big grin filled his face. While Ino…

"Really? Oh Shika…" Ino trailed off as a hand covered her gasped mouth, tears welling up in her eyes. Shikamaru nodded before he fell back into his chair, rubbing his temples.

"Um, what does that have to do with anything?" Ten-Ten asked carefully. At her question, Team 10 looked back at everyone as if they had forgotten that they were all there.

"Sorry guys, this is Ino-Shika-Cho business." Choji explained. "But you said that you trust these kids, right Naruto?" At Naruto's nodded, Choji continued, "Then we'll trust your judgement. Besides, wasn't the worst that four kids can do?"

As Mirai followed him out of the meeting, Kakashi could feel her questions. She was curious, he noticed.

"Well, out with it. Ask your questions." Kakashi stated as the chunin bodyguard walked beside him. She looked at him, the ruby of her eyes reflecting brightly in the sun.

"…They're not questions as much as me trying to work out what happened. Shika's my godfather, hell, he's the closest thing I have to a dad. I know when he's being stupidly overprotective. And in there, he looked ready to be beat the living the shit out of Ino because she said that they should be interrogated. It was like she suggested that Shikadai should test out some of her new torture devices. That's it, I want to meet these kids! Anyone who can make Shika act this way needs to be looked at." Mirai stated firmly.

"Well, then you better stick around. I've got a meeting with one of the little ones." She blinked at him.

"What?"

"Benihime Uzumaki demanded that I buy her ramen today. It was hard to say no." He explained. Asuma's daughter blinked before stifling a laugh. The urge became too strong and soon she was laughing full on. Kakashi sweat-dropped. _Look at the abuse I get and from my own bodyguard._

"I think I'm going to take you up on that offer." Mirai said happily before grabbing onto his right arm and lacing her left arm around it. He could easily break the hold. Easily. It wasn't as if he was trying to avoid having an angry chunin.

"But I better make sure you actually pay for us."

"Me, not pay? Never!" She snorted.

They arrived at Ichiraku's just before the kids. Thankfully, Takashi had asked Naruto to tell him that Beni wanted Ichiraku's for lunch. Old man Ichiraku was actually in today, helping his daughter by making the noodles. Ayame had aged a bit but for a civilian, she was still beautiful woman.

"Well, if it isn't Lord Sixth?" Ayame greeted happily as she brought them water. "And Mirai! How's your mother?"

"She's good, thank you."

"Now what can I get you guys?"

"Actually," Kakashi started. "We're waiting for one more-"

"Lord Sixth!" A cherub squeaked before his lap gained a bundle of energy and red hair. Mirai was laughing at the dumbfounded expression on his masked face as the young Uzumaki proceeded to hug and squeal,

"You're here! You're here! You're here! And you're not late! I'm so proud!" Really, did people really think so low of him. Luckily, Mirai felt pity on him and decided to speak to the girl.

"Hi, I'm Mirai Sarutobi. I hope you don't mind that I'm crashing your lunch. I've got to protect the old man."

"Hey!"

"No, no! The more, the merrier!" Beni agreed with her endless smiles before she turned in his lap so that she was facing Mirai. She had stuck out her little hand towards the chunin.

"I'm Benihime Uzumaki but you can call me Beni! Your eyes are really pretty! Are you also an Uchiha? I like your hair! Do you think I should do that with my hair? And you're a chunin, that's so cool! I want-" With an equally large smile, Mirai shook the small hand, cutting off Beni.

"Thank you for the compliments, Beni, and yes, I am a chunin. But I assure you, this," she waved a hand to herself, "is all Sarutobi. And I like your hair just the way it is. It would be a shame if we cut it all off, you know." No, Kakashi didn't keep Mirai around so that she could do all of the communicating. He would never do something like that. The little Uzumaki blinked before declaring,

"I like you!" Then the child swiveled around so she could point a finger at his masked face. With the most serious and adorable face he's ever seen, Beni ordered, "You should keep her." Before either shinobi could comment, a cough erupted from behind him. Kakashi looked over his shoulder as Beni chirped,

"Taka, I found Lord Sixth and I made a new friend!" Her older brother smirked back at them. Behind him was Mira, her sleeping sister tucked against her chest. Mira gave a lazy wave to them, being careful to not wake her sister.

"I see that." Taka said, clearly amused by his sister's antics. "Remember you are on a strict three-bowl limit, no don't give me those eyes. You know rules, Beni. Sir," Taka stated to Kakashi, a hand held out with ryos. "This should cover Beni. Mira and I are meeting Boruto and Shikadai's teams for at Yakiniku Q if you need me. Be good for the Lord Sixth and…"

"Mirai Sarutobi." She introduced himself and shook Takashi's hand.

"Takashi Uzumaki. Be good for the Lord Sixth and Chunin Sarutobi." As the boy was about to turn away, Kakashi grabbed his elbow.

"You don't have to pay for Beni, I've got it cover." Kakashi promised as he placed the money back into the boy's hands. The blonde blinked before stepping back to bow at him.

"Thank you, Sir." He straightened before winking that his sister before reiterating, "Be good, Beni."

"Bye, Taka. Bye, Mira." Beni called as the two teens walked away. Mirai, who toke in the scene with an almost quizzical look, looked down at Beni with a smile.

"That's a good brother you got there, Beni."

"Yep! Taka's the best! He even sneaks me out of the academy to get ice cream if it's a chakra theory day! But don't tell sensei or Mommy or Daddy." Beni warned as sternly as a seven-year-old could. "That's our thing."

"Well, your secret is safe with us." Mirai promised as Ayame moved back over to them for their orders.

"So, Beni, what type of ramen do you want?" Kakashi asked when it became clear to him that the child wasn't going to move from his lap. _She very tactile, it seems._ She placed a finger on her chin as she pondered the question.

"Pork, please!"

Kakashi and Mirai waited until she was on her second bowl before they started asking Beni some questions. Nothing harmful! But they had some questions that need to be answered. Even if he felt a little guilty using the child's innocence against her.

"Beni, why were you with your brother when he was training?" Kakashi asked carefully. Mirai's red eyes narrowed slightly as they waited for the girl to finish her slurp.

"Bluch!" Beni burped before blushing, "Excuse me. Um, I've always watched Taka train. I want to be a great shinobi like Taka and Mira and Mommy and Daddy!" Kakashi locked eyes with Mirai at the mention of the Nara girl's name. Mirai nodded to him before she looked down at Beni.

"That's great, Beni!" The chunin started. "Does Taka train with Mira often?"

"Yep! All the time." _Huh, this is going to be harder than I thought. This kid is good._

"Are they close?" Kakashi tried again.

"Yep!" Yeah, this was getting nowhere. Beni knew how to give vague but honest answers. Nothing that would give him any proof against their story. Mirai tried a different approach.

"So, do you know fuinjutsu too?" The girl nodded as she reached for her third bowl. It must be an Uzumaki thing. No one should be able to consume that much ramen and still be so tiny.

"Mommy's teaching us." _Us, huh. Shit, that still implies her and her brother. Maybe I should ask about her parents. Her brother looks too much like Sensei and Naruto to not be from his family._

If their story was true, then the time-traveling Uzumakis were the progeny of Boruto and Himawari. However, it was the fuinjutsu subject that wasn't adding up. Naruto never truly mastered fuinjutsu (or learned, for that matter), Boruto specialized too much in ninjutsu to invest himself in the art and Himawari was too Hyuga and young to know anything about sealing. Beni also kept mentioning that her mother was teaching them fuinjutsu, implying that they were Uzumakis through their mother, not their father. And clearly the father was still in the picture, since Beni kept mentioning him. Kakashi felt like he had all of the pieces in front of him but couldn't seeing the painting before him. It was rather annoying.

"Taka's feels guilty that we're here." Beni stated suddenly as she pushed away her bowl. "He didn't mean for the seal to work and he can't get it to work again. He stayed up all last night writing it over and over again to figure it out. He wants to keep us safe and get us all home, even if it kills him." She looked up at him, her golden-brown eyes pleading with him.

"We just want to go home. We won't cause trouble or hurt the village or the Hokage. We promise. Please believe us. Taka and Mira are going to be sick if they don't rest."

No, Kakashi's heart didn't break into pieces at the girl's honest, heart-felt plea. Absolutely not. He was a kage, thank you ever much. He did not submit to the pleas of little girls. But today, he made an exception. At Mirai's elbow and look of 'Do something, you idiot,' he flicked the kid's nose. The sad expression on her face faded as she scrunched up her nose, looking up at him with curiosity. He gave her his famous eye-smile.

"You got it, kid." And no, the smile she gave him didn't make him decide to treat his group to ice cream. No never, he was a cheap bastard, after all. Nor did he let Beni ride on his back as they walked around the village. Stop laughing, Mirai!

 **Meanwhile, in Konoha 2.0**

 _Shikamaru_

Shikamaru paused his searching for a second, his fatherly senses tingling. A male had treated one of his girls to lunch, without his permission. He didn't know if this upset him or made him feel relief. Relief, let's go with relief. Relief meant that his kids were still alive, somewhere. Besides, Takashi knew the master plan and wouldn't let anything happen to the girls.

Shaking his head, Shikamaru returned to the scrolls that littered the living room floor. He could feel the headache coming on as the kanji blurred. There was a reason he left the fuinjutsu to Naruto and the kids. Perhaps he shouldn't have let Naruto dump all of their scrolls about fuinjutsu in here at once. But who was he to say no to his worried and stressed wife? Especially when she still looked ready to shatter at any moment.

Now, let's make something extremely clearly. Naruto Uzumaki Nara was the strongest woman in the world. She wasn't weak by any means. However, Naruto has always had problems with loss. Given her isolated childhood, she clung to her precious people, forever fearing that she would one day be alone and unloved once again. This drove her to selflessly take any hit, attack any enemy and kill whoever dared hurt her precious people. And while at times, this habit of hers drove him crazy; ( _Because god dammit Naruto, how the hell do you think we would feel if you died? How do you think I would feel, you troublesome woman?_ ) it was one of the many, many reasons he loved her.

Absolutely no one was more precious to Naruto than their children. Shikamaru knew this the moment they first found out she was pregnant. Earlier that day, Naruto had gone to regular check-up. No, seriously, just a routine check-up, nothing special. But after Tsunade had told them the news and left, Naruto remained in a daze for the rest of the day. It wasn't until they were getting ready for bed that night that it hit really her. She had stared at herself in the mirror, her hands placed on her flat stomach. She had whispered,

 _"_ _It shouldn't be possible…" He remembers looking over at her as he removed his ponytail. He started to walk over to her as she continued her ramblings._

 _"_ _They said it would never be possible. I could never be a kunoichi. I could never be the Hokage. I could never be a wife. I could never be a mother. That's what they all said. I could only be the demon girl, the dead-last, forever alone." Her sapphire eyes never left the mirror, her arms now wrapped around herself as if they were shielding her from her past. He moved up against her, wrapping his arms over hers. Their fingers laced together as he locked eyes with her in the mirror._

 _"_ _And what would you say to them now?" Shikamaru asked before he pressed a kiss into her golden locks. Naruto leaned back even more into him, tilting her head back she that she could return the kiss. For moment, they got lost in each other. Nothing else mattered. When she pulled back, she opened her watery eyes before joking,_

 _"_ _Not bad for a dead-last, huh." He snorted as she wiggled herself out of his arms, the dark navy shirt that she stole from him twirling around her. She was beautiful._

 _"_ _Our kids are going to be forces to reckon with, Shikamaru! They'll have Konoha at their beck and call before you know it!" She stated as excitement radiated off of her. It was intoxicating, her excitement, her energy, her smile. He could drown in it and die a happy man._

 _"_ _Kids?" He teased as her whiskers cheeks blushed ruby._

 _"_ _Well, you know I've always wanted a family. And I absolutely love your family, Shikamaru! But I've always wanted to be that parent at the Chunin Exams, saying 'Hell Yeah, that's my kid and I got others back at home who can kick just as much ass as that. And I-" He took hold of her shoulders, causing her to pause and look up at him. He smiled down at her, tucking a rebellious strand of hair behind her ear._

 _"_ _We can have as many kids as you want, Naruto. And my family has always been your family, never forget that. I get what you mean, though, so stop worrying." She jumped up onto her toes to kiss him, the joy flowing out of her._

 _"_ _But I'll warn, you, Lazy Husband." Naruto stated with a joking sternness. "I'm expecting a rather large family." He couldn't help the laugh that erupted out of him._

 _"_ _Whatever you want, Troublesome Wife."_

"Shikamaru!" His mother's yell snapped him out of his memories. He looked up at her through his smoke. Under normal situations, Mom would have snapped his cigarette and his pack and burned it in his fireplace, like she's done the other 50 times he was stupid enough to smoke around her. But Mom wasn't going to do that to him today. Not when her grandkids were on the line. He could tell that she was worried about him.

"Shikamaru, Naruto was calling for you. Tsunade and I will keep looking through the scrolls in here. Ok?" Mom stated as Tsunade came back into the room. Upon hearing that her adorable great-grandbabies were missing, Tsunade left her sake at home and grabbed her reading glasses. Instead of looking like she was 24, she now looked around 45, to make it more realistic when the kids called her Granny.

It really was a team effort to get his kids back. Kakashi and Shizune immediately took helm of the office, giving them a week before the council would wonder what the hell happened to the Lady Hokage. He had left Kiba in charge of his jonin while Ino was volunteering at the hospital to replace Tsunade and Shizune. Choji was running the Nara clan with one of Shikamaru's second cousins. All the while, Hinata, Shino, Lee, Ten-Ten, Sasuke and Sai left for mission to Suna, where Gaara had offered to spearhead the search for the kids through the villages. Shikamaru had never been more gratefully for his friends until now.

Shikamaru nodded to the older women before standing. He walked through the halls, trying to ignore how suffocating the silence was. He cursed all of those times he wished for quiet. He would do anything to have his kids running down the halls and causing a ruckus again.

He entered Takashi's sky-blue room. Shikamaru could remember how he and Sai spent all day getting the ceiling perfect for his son's fifth birthday. All Takashi wanted that year was to sleep under a clear blue sky, with a few clouds here and there. It had taken the men forever to get the clouds to change and move but somehow, with Sai's powers, they did it and Takashi was so happy that year.

The room was an absolute mess though, completely the opposite of how Takashi left it the day before. Naruto had marched into the room yesterday, took one look at it and stated,

"You may want to stay out of here. I have a feeling I'm going have to destroy his room to find his stash."

With that, Naruto locked herself in there and only left to sleep for three hours last night. And judging by the state of the room and all of the cursing he heard, she did as she promised. Takashi's dresser and closet were overturned completely with all of his clothes thrown out into the hallway. All of his sleeves emptied, all of his books scattered across the floor. His bed was flipped onto it's side and there it was, his stash where he kept his personal fuinjutsu notes.

Naruto was sitting against the overturned bed, their son's books and scrolls scattered around her in a classic chaotic but completely organized nature. Shikamaru stared at his wife's exhausted form. She had ink smeared across her cheek and in her hair. Her kunoichi dress was wrinkled behind repair while her braid was falling out over her shoulder. But even in her low state, she was still breathtaking.

Her focus was completely on the well-love, leather bound book in her hands though. She didn't look up when he entered into the room, crushing his cigarette before he entered. He walked slowly to her until he knelt down in front of her. Finally, she snapped out of her daze and blinked at him. She forces a baby smile and he returned it.

"Our son is a lazy genius, Shikamaru. He's also in so much trouble." Naruto stated firmly.

"And why would our son be in so much trouble?" He was almost afraid to know.

"20 seals. Our son had 20 different seals on his collection so that I couldn't get to them. I've been burned, soaked, cut, and electrocoated while deciphering his amazing fuinjutsu. Our son has been a master of fuinjutsu for the past two years and he was too lazy to take the damn test to earn his mastery. But this," She held up the diary. "puts even my father's or Mito's seals to shame. Takashi has created seals that could reattach limbs, Shika. The seals that I could read, they're amazing."

"That you could read?" Shikamaru asked. His wife nodded before she tossed the book to him.

"Look at page 47." At her command, he found a page completely in number. Evenly spaced out and lined, rows upon rows of numbers filled the entire page. He flipped to the next page and there was a drawing of an Uzumaki chakra circle with the Flying Thunder God seal drawn next to it.

"He coded it?" Shikamaru asked.

"Yep."

"But he hates coding." Wait a second. Shikamaru tuned back to the number page and noticed the difference in penmanship.

"Don't tell me…" Shikamaru groaned out anyway as his wife sighed in agreement.

"Yep, he decided to have his twin code it for him. There's got to be a key but I can't find it. I've been looking at that damn page for over an hour. Please tell me you can figure it out."

"Pass me a pen, this is going to take a while." His words made his wife deflate a little, closing her eyes. She looked so tried. He reached out and cradled her cheek. Her eyes cracked open slightly before she leaned closer into his palm.

"You should get some sleep." Shikamaru stated. Naruto snorted before grabbing his hand against her cheek. She raised it to her lips and pressed a kiss to his wedding band.

"You first." She challenged.

"We'll get them back."

"I know." She whispered back. They didn't sleep that night, not one wink.

 **Author's Note- Yes, we got to see Konoha 2.0 again! And I think you guys are starting to notice that Canon Shikamaru is becoming more and more protective of Mira and Motoko. Trust me, that's supposed to happen and it'll happen to Canon Naruto too. Basically everyone from canon are feeling the way that Kakashi's feeling, they have all of the pieces but they can't see the picture. Also, isn't Kakashi the biggest king of denial? It's freaking hilarious! I think him and Mirai make a great duo! Honestly, I was debating adding Mirai into this story because of how close her name is to Mira. However, it worked out so she's in. I want your guys' honest opinions so you better review. Should I have a Mirai in Konoha 2.0? 2.0 Shikamaru has a godchild. Should this godchild be Mirai, have a different name, or completely change it up by making it a boy? Please review what you want and I'll take it into consideration! I love you guys so much! And Merry Christmas! See you guys next time!**

 **-V. I. Winthrop**


	6. The YOUTHFUL Spar!

**Author's Note - Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry for the wait but I think I made up for it with this chapter! So, we have a few things happening here. First, we get action, hell yeah! I used Yoruichi's and Soi Fon's fight from Bleach as a reference so if you guys need help picturing it, its on Youtube. Second, this chapter is extremely Uzumaki focused. I'm trying to balance out the two families. One chapter will focus on the Uzumakis, the other on the Naras, etc. Basically, this is my way to ensure that Canon Naruto learns his heritage (because really, I thought that Naruto should learn something, anything from the great clan). And finally, Boruto's Ino-Shika-Cho trio actually got some lines! (Oh, and shout out to my friend, KisaragiKei's fic,** ** _Troublesome Game_** **! This fic is has a darker, more serious tone to it but its only two chapters and I'm already in love! You guys should check it out, hint hint, nudge nudge!) So, that should be it! On to the story!**

Chapter 6: A YOUTHFUL Spar!

 _Shikadai_

"Oh my god! Aren't you the cutest, most precious little munchkin in the world?! Yes, you are! Yes, you are!"

Shikadai should've know that letting Chocho sit next to Motoko at lunch was a bad idea. Chocho had two main passions, food and babies. Food, for obvious reasons, and babies because they were, in her words, 'cute, cuddly, and have the chubbiest cheeks you've ever seen!' So, when Mira had passed Motoko to Chocho so that she could get into the booth, the child was stuck in Chocho's arms for the rest of lunch.

"It's just a brat." Inojin grumbled next to him and Shikadai nodded in agreement, (though Motoko wasn't actually a brat). Chocho was the reason that they couldn't do babysitting D-Ranks anymore. How troublesome. Still, Motoko took his teammate's fussing in stride, happily cuddling against the bigger girl and letting Chocho feed her barbeque.

"And Konohamaru-Sensei said that-" Shikadai tried to tune out Boruto's unfortunately loud voice as he told Taka and Mira about their D-Ranks this morning. Which were nothing special, dude, they're D-Ranks for a reason. Then there was Sarada's yelling at the top of her lungs, telling Boruto to 'Stop making up shit! That's not how it went! Boruto!'. Ugh, thank god Mitsuki wasn't loud. Maybe they could finish eating and get out of here before-

"Oh, if it isn't my most youthful friends!"

 _Fuck… Man, what a drag…_ Don't get Shikadai wrong, Metal Lee was an awesome guy and a great friend. But he was loud, annoying, and yelled youthful way too many time to still be grammatical correct. Why couldn't he have quieter friends?

"Oh, Lee, come join us!" Inojin, you smirking bastard. Shikadai stomped on Inojin's toe as Lee moved to sit at the end of the table. Next to him. In retaliation, Inojin gave him the finger. Now he would have to deal with Lee's loud antics for the rest of the meal. Great.

"My friends, unfortunately my youthful teammates can not make it today because they are recovering from the unyouthful Tora!" Even though Lee was basically yelling out his words, a shiver went down the spines of all of the teenagers, even Mira and Taka. _Shit, that means that damn cat never dies._

"Don't worry about it, Lee. Anyway, remember those kids that popped out of the ground yesterday?" Chocho asked as Lee grabbed some meat off of the grill.

"Yes! They ran away in the most youthful manner! The speed that they achieved, it was positively youthful!" Lee exclaimed.

"Thanks, man." Taka said while giving Lee a two-finger salute. The action caused Lee to pause, the piece of meat falling out of his chopsticks. Seeing the confusion on Lee's face, Shikadai decided to do the introduction.

"Lee, this is Takashi Uzumaki. He along with three girls traveled back in time to our Konoha and are stuck here until we can figure out a way to get them home. Takashi, this is Metal Lee, member of Team 5 and a taijutsu specialist." Their friends watched as the two boys stared each other down.

"Taijutsu huh?" Taka smirked, life sparking in his normally bored blue eyes. "That's impressive. It takes a lot of time and dedication to specialize in taijutsu." The oddest thing was that Lee, socially awkward Lee, actually smirked back.

"Indeed. You speak from experience, youthful acquaintance." Lee commented, making the rest table pause. _Speak from experience? Wait, don't tell me-_

"Huh? What do you mean, Lee?" Chocho asked. Lee pointed to Taka's arms, more specifically his forearms.

"Only a taijutsu specialist would bandage his arms in such a manner. A taijutsu specialist who is mastering or currently mastering the Reserve Lotus." Lee stated with confidence. Taka snorted before clapped.

"Well caught." Taka praised before an overwhelming sense of dread filled Shikadai as the boys stared each other down. Looks like there were going to be a lot of downed trees soon. _Taijutsu though, huh, wasn't expecting that…_

"Shall we see who's taijutsu is best?" Lee challenged, standing up. But then the bored look entered Taka's eyes again. He shook his head and leaned back against the booth.

"Nah." He yawned. "Too much work." This made everyone sweat-drop and caused Boruto to snort,

"Look's likes someone's afraid of getting their ass whooped."

In seconds, the room dropped at least 20 degrees as a dark-blue, killing intent glow surrounded the slouched back form. Shikadai couldn't stop the shiver that ran down his back as Taka's eyes sharpened dangerously. He faced Lee and grinned,

"Challenge accepted."

Taka stood, reinforcing the first stared down. It was like there was lightning between him and Lee, the energy palpable. _If they fight in the restaurant, Dad's going to kill me._

"Alright, time out!" Mira shouted before her hand shoot out to grab Taka's shoulder. She pushed him down back into his seat and shoved a piece of meat into his mouth. Shikadai had to stop the laugh that almost erupted at the funny sight of the blonde choking.

"Ugh, what the hell, Mira?" Taka complained as the girl glared right back at him.

"Food first, you moron. You barely ate and if you pass out after your _oh so_ _manly_ showdown because you didn't eat enough, I'm going to strangle you. Now, eat!" She ordered as she pushed more meat onto his plate.

"But Mira-"

"Don't even think about." With that, the boy dove into his food, eating at a speed that made Uncle Choji look slow.

"And you!" Mira said, pointing her chopsticks at Lee. He straightened at attention. "Don't even think about leaving this table without eating first!"

"Um, yes, ma'am." Lee sweat dropped before diving into his food too. "Um, who are you?" It was then that the table realized that they forget to introduce the Nara girls.

"Mira Nara, pleased to meet you. The girl in Chocho's lap is my sister, Motoko. We're with this dumbass." Mira said, pointing her chopsticks at Taka before she turned back to her plate. Shikadai was about to do the same when he noticed that Lee was still staring at her, a blush on his cheeks. _Ah, hell no!_

Shikadai didn't even bother to withhold the death-glare that he sent to Lee. Yeah, hell would have to freeze over before he let anyone stared at _his sister_ like that. So, what if Mira and Motoko weren't actually his sisters? It's was close enough and a matter of principle. At his glare, Lee shirked back and brought his attention back to his food. Good. A foot nudged him and to Shikadai's surprise, it was Taka who nodded thanks to him. _Huh? What was that about?_

"Man, why does Lee and Taka get to spar first?" Boruto complained as everyone sat on the sidelines of the training field. "I'll never be chunin at this rate."

"Boruto, stop complaining. I doubt we'll be able to spar at all today. They look ready to kill each other." Sarada commented.

"Nah, they'll be fine. Taka needs to relieve some stress and Lee volunteered to be his punching bag. A few punches here and there and they'll be best friends by dinner time. It's the field you guys should be more worried about." At Mira's comment, the genins turned to her.

"What? Taka's strong and his punches hurt." The girl said, rubbing the back of her neck. "He could probably level all of these trees if he wanted to. I wouldn't be surprised if he makes moon craters." _Great, we're going to have to repair the field again. Troublesome._

"What, you let your boyfriend hit you?!" Chocho exclaimed, the horror plastered on her and Sarada's faces. Mira made a disturbed face before saying,

"First off, he's not my boyfriend, that's just-"

"Ew?"

"Yes, ew, thank you Motoko. Second, we spar all the time. If you think you can spar with Taka and not get hit, you're insane. Third- oh look, it's starting." With that, Shikadai watched the two in the middle of the field. They faced each other.

"You ready, Lee? I'm not going to go easy on you." Taka commented.

"Good, neither will I. Let's us have a youthful spar for the hand of the fair maiden!" Lee declared before rushing towards Taka at break-neck speed. Dust kicked up on the field and for a moment Shikadai thought it was all over.

"First off!" Taka yelled as the dust cleared. The shock filled everyone at the sight of the two boys. Taka was standing perfectly still, with his left arm bracing Lee's kick in place. He was completely unfazed by Lee's attacked and had a tick mark on his forehead.

"Mira is not my girlfriend!"

Moving faster than Shikadai could ever accomplish, Taka had used his left arm against Lee's leg as leverage to drive a heel under Lee's chin. Lee barely dodged, backflipping away from the blonde. Taka huffed his bangs out of his face before speeding after Lee. He jumped high above Lee, leg extended for a drop-kick. Lee dodged and it was a good thing he did. Shikadai's seen Sarada and her mom make craters before but never had he seen a genin make one so big.

"That would just be- you know what, never mind!" Taka continued from his crater. "Second, she's not allowed to date until she's at least a jonin! Orders from the Jonin Commander so don't even think about it!"

"I knew it!" Mira and Motoko whispered in disbelief but Shikadai doubted anyone else heard them. Lee had released his shuriken at Taka. Doing something he's only seen Lee do, Taka catch all of them with practiced easy.

"Jonin Commander?" Shikadai questioned as the group watched a barrage of fists and kicks.

"Yeah, my Dad's the Jonin Commander." Mira answered, her eyes never leaving the fight, unless to look up at- the sun? _Huh, that's weird._

Taka and Lee had met in clashing kicks, canceling each other out. They jumped away from each other, gaining space. They launched at each other again. Lee throw a punch, Taka pushed it back. Taka kneed him, Lee blocked it with his elbow. And the speed that they were using, it was unreal. Were they actually getting faster?

"Man, that must suck if you ever bring home a boyfriend." Chocho commented.

"Yep, he can get really scary!" A voice behind Shikadai chirped. Turning around, he saw Lord Sixth and his god sister, Mirai, their eyes glued to the spar. But neither of them had spoken. No, it was the red-head child hanging off of the Lord Sixth's shoulder.

"Mira! The Lord Sixth and Miss Mirai got me ice cream!" Beni yelled from her perch as a grunt sounded through the field.

Lee was thrown back into the trees, making a valley of rock on his way. Taka was running after him. Then he jumped back as Lee did a handstand kick out of his ditch, releasing hidden kunais at his opponent. Taka blocked them down, using what looked like an ivy blue chain wrapped around his right forearm. The moment Taka paused, Lee's dropkick was upon him, using the foot of his bent leg to press against Taka's chained arm and close the distance. In an act of pure flexibility and skill, Taka clamped his hand down on the foot on his chained arm and twisted his body upwards so that his foot could block Lee's drop kick. Lee back-bended into a handstand as Taka leaped over him, the two breaking apart.

"He can use chakra chains." Lord Sixth commented with surprise.

"Duh, he's an Uzumaki." Mira drawled out.

"But no one in my family can't do that…" Boruto said, causing Beni and Motoko to look at him in shock. But what Shikadai noticed was that Mira fought the urge to not look at him. She flinched, she definitely did. _But why would she care?_

"But that's bla, blah, Mira?"

"Blasphemy, Beni."

"Blasphemy, you can't be an Uzumaki and not use chakra chains!" Beni cried before looking down at Boruto. "You, me, and Taka, early morning training, tomorrow! Don't even think about sleeping in or I'll drag you out myself!"

"Um…, yes, Beni-"

"Good!"

"Feisty! Kakashi, we should keep her!" Mirai joked before dunking as a tree branch headed her way. "Hey!"

"AH, MY MOST SINCERIEST APOLOGIES, MISS MIRAI!" Lee yelled back before launching him at Taka. "LEAF HURRICANE!"

"SIREN'S SNARE!" The two kicks canceled each other but Taka's second leg swung around at Lee's head, hooking his knee around Lee's neck and slamming down on his head with an elbow. Lee crashed into the ground below, forming a Lee size crater. But then he shot back up and charged at Taka, a staff extended behind his back. Taka's chains started to overlap one another, giving him armored gauntlets. They clashed.

"Amazing. Their taijutsu is superb!" Sarada exclaimed, her sharingan spinning.

"So, this is what the noise was all about." Shikadai's eyes widen before he swiveled around to see Dad and the Hokage behind him. Like Lord Sixth and Mirai, their eyes were glued to the fight before the group. It was Dad who had spoken, a cigarette hanging from his lips.

"What are you doing here, Old Man?" Boruto asked, a sneer evident in his voice before a rock connected to the back of his head, hard. "Hey! What the hell, Beni?"

"That's not how you talk to your daddy, you big meanie!" Beni scolded, before she yelled at the top of her lungs, making everyone in their group cover their ears.

"TAKA, BORUTO'S BEING RUDE AGAIN!"

"So! Not! The! Time! Beni! Gah! Fuck, Crashing Waves!" Taka said during a series of swipes from Lee. After one connected with his chin, Taka folded backwards. He pushed his heels below Lee's ribcage, one foot after the other in an almost break-dancing move.

"Thank you for that, Benihime, though, you shouldn't throw rocks, ok?" The Lord Hokage said. She gave him a blinding smile and a thumbs-up in return.

"We were trying to do work but all of the mini-earthquakes were a little worrying." He explained, his eyes peeled and his muscles tense, as if he wanted to join in on the punching contest.

"He's playing hooky." Dad deadpanned, making his boss sweat-drop. Then he looked down, Motoko tugging on his pants leg. Shikadai didn't stop the smile that spread on his face as his father smiled down on the little girl and picked her up, holding her close. It was good to see Dad smiling this much again. Then, Dad narrowed his eyes more, analyzing the fight.

"So, Takashi's proficient in the Strong Fist." Dad deduced, causing Lord Sixth to shake his head.

"No, it's extremely similar to Guy's style but Takashi appears to use his flexibility more often." Lord Sixth explained, causing the Lord Hokage to comment.

"I've seen this style before."

"That's because it's extremely popular amongst the water villages." Everyone turned to look at Mira. Again, her eyes remained glued on the fight. _Though, she's still checking the sun._ But there was an edge to her eyes and her hands were twitching slightly.

"More specifically," She continued, "It's called Breakers. Best way to describe it is the Uzumaki's version to the Strong Fist. Uzumaki shinobi and the Seven Ninja Swordsmen were the most proficient in this style. The key is to use your opponents' body against them. They punch you, you brace the arm against you as leverage for a kick. They kick you, you trap it and snap the leg in half. So, you are either breaking the path of the attack or-"

"You're breaking the limb used." Shikadai finished, snapping his eyes back to the fight. Both boys were breathing heavenly now but they both had a smile, as if this is the best spar either has had in a long time.

"You seem to know a lot about this style, Miss Nara." Lord Sixth commented. Out of the corner of his eye, Shikadai saw Mira just barely tighten her fist before answering,

"I've known Taka my entire life. It's hard not to."

"Who's winning though?" Inojin asked.

"Neither." Lord Sixth and Dad said at the same time.

"Huh?" Asked the group of genin. Mira stayed silent though.

"Neither are fighting to their fullest potential." Lord Hokage said, his eyes shining with what looked like pride. "You all know how fast Lee is, with and without his weights. From what I've seen, Takashi could match those speeds if he wanted to. But they're having too much fun to actually do that. Isn't that right, Miss Nara?"

"Please, just Mira is fine, sir. And yes, you're right."

Lee vaulted over Taka, using his bo staff as leverage as Taka slide under him. Landing, Lee pivoted, the staff extending out to clip Taka. The blonde recoiled but recovered quickly to stop the second round. The end in one hand, Taka karate-chopped the bo, causing it to snap like a toothpick. Again, the boys separated, before starting to rush towards each other.

Then, they froze?

"Shadow Possession Jutsu, complete."

It wasn't a male Nara who performed the jutsu on the boys. It was Mira and her range and speed was astonishing. All of the adults, yes, even Dad, were staring at her shadows in shock. She was kneeling now, her hands in the traditional rat symbol. But her shadows- Holy shit, the guys were sparing nearly 100 yards away and she was able to ensnare them both?! And her shadow was split in two and they didn't narrow at all?! How?!

Shikadai was good with his shadows. So good in fact that Grandma Yoshino commented on it whenever she decides to come over for the early morning training. Which was almost daily. Hell, she really should be living with them, she was over so often. But seeing as her and Mom have had this really weird tension for the past four years, its probably a good thing Grandma stayed in the house next door…

Back to the jutsu. Shadow Possession Jutsu (or Shadow Paralysis if you really wanted to be old fashioned) was a demanding technique. Most Naras can only hold the jutsu for around five minutes before they run out of chakra. Dad holds the record for being able to hold the jutsu for around 30 to 45 minutes, depending on the situation, lighting, closeness to the target, etc. It's actually a huge accomplishment that Shikadai could hold his Shadow Possession for 4 minutes at his age. But at the sight of Mira's jutsu, he could tell that his skills paled in comparison to hers. _Just how much chakra does she have?_

"Time's up, boys. You're done." Mira ordered, ignoring the incredulous looks she was receiving from everyone. It was then that Shikadai realized that she had been using the sun to keep track of time. Lee looked like he was trying to move but couldn't budge at all. Taka, on the other hand, didn't even bother trying.

"Ah come on, Mira. We can both keep going!" Taka whined, before a shadow hand shot out to smack him on the back of the head. "Hey!"

"Don't be a dumbass. You could send each other to the hospital if you keep this up and you both know it. I'm calling this one a draw. Now, the moment I release you both, you two are going to sit under a tree and only move to drink water. Got it?"

"Fine, what a-" Taka was cut off by another smack on the head. But for some reason, the moment looked ridiculously familiar to Shikadai. And it wasn't just Shikadai who thought this…

"Yes, Mira." Lee answered. The shadows receded back to her and the boys limped back to the group. They were supporting each other, laughing and complementing each others' skills. And would you look at that, they're friends now. _But why does Mira know so much about the Uzumaki's taijutsu style?_

"Well," Taka said, falling back against a tree, his arms pillowing his head, "if you need me, I'll be unavailable for the next two hours." And promptly started snoring, making everyone sweat-drop.

"Has he always been this bi-polar?" Boruto asked, causing Mira to shrug.

"Aren't all shinobi?" She asked back rhetorically before nudging the sleeping blonde with her foot.

"Aw, Taka's out cold again." Beni complained, having dropped down from Lord Sixth to poke her brother's face. Motoko nodded in agreement, still perched in Dad's arms.

"Beni, leave him alone."

"Aw!" Beni whined as Mira moved the pouting redhead away. Then she looked back up at the sun and frowned.

"Well, I guess we can still do some light sparing." She started. "It's getting close to dinner time though so we're going to have to hurry."

 _Boruto_

"Geeze kid, what do you eat? Bricks?" Boruto asked rhetorically as he carried Beni back to his house. Dad was walking next to him, piggybacking the still passed out Taka. He winched as Beni tugged a fistful of hair.

"Lord Hokage, Boruto called me fat."

"Boruto, be nice to Benihime. Benihime, let go of his hair." Dad ordered sternly.

After some light sparing, everyone had left to go home. Mirai and Old Man Kakashi had left shortly after the spar, with the promise that they would stop by Aunt Ino's house for the monthly Konoha 12 dinner. Dad and Uncle Shikamaru decided to stay around though, calling out mistakes as they saw them. And honestly, it was nice having Dad there to watch him spar with his friends again. Not that he would ever admit it out loud.

Anyway, when everyone (including a rested Lee) was done training, Mira had gotten up to wake Taka. She shook him a few times. Then she snapped her fingers under his nose.

 _"_ _Taka, seriously. Wake up." She grumbled, trying to wake him again._

 _"_ _Man, he's a heavy sleeper." Chocho commented._

 _"_ _Maybe he's dead." Inojin said, not missing a beat. Only flinch back when the three time-traveling girls turned to death-glare him. Even Motoko, who looked like she was taking her own nap, shot straight up to glare at him. These girls even glared the same, man, they were weird…_

 _"_ _He's not dead. He's exhausted. The dumbass hasn't been sleeping again. Troublesome boy." Mira explained before she knelt down in front of him._

 _She unpillowed his arms before putting his hands together, creating a loop. Before anyone could stop her, Mira looped his arms around her neck and lifted him onto her back. His dirty blonde hair fell out of its low ponytail, revealing the back of his neck and more of his brown roots. Huh, never actually noticed how dark his roots were. She stood with a practiced ease, as if she has done it hundreds of times. She started trekking back over to their group, Taka snoozing peaceful on her shoulder, her arms holding his body up. Dad and Uncle Shikamaru shared a look before Dad stepped forward._

 _"_ _Mira, would like one of us to take him?" Dad asked. Mira looked up and blinked in confusion. Then the understanding entered her face._

 _"_ _Huh? Um, how do I explain this? The thing is that Taka probably won't let anyone else carry him." Mira stated. Silence and confusion filled the group._

 _"_ _Huh?" The group asked unanimously. Mira sighed before muttering,_

 _"_ _You are such a drag, Taka, I hope you know that." Then she straightened and explained._

 _"_ _Taka's actually not as heavy of a sleeper as you think. The safer he feels, the heavier he sleeps. Trying to get him up for a mission briefing is a real pain. Anyway, if you try to touch him while he's sleeping and he doesn't trust you, well-"_

 _"_ _He goes into sleepy taijutsu mode and kicks butt!" Beni finished, causing Lee to get a starry-eyed look. Immediately, Lee was in Mira's face, more screaming than asking,_

 _"_ _MY ETERNAL RIVAL KNOWS THE SLEEPY FIST!" Only to get yanked back by Uncle Shikamaru, a dangerous vibe rolling off of him that made every male genin (sans Shikadai and Taka) shiver._

 _"_ _Um, if you call sleep fighting that than yes, he does…" Mira trailed off, completely oblivious to the boys' perils. She paused for a moment, her eyes locking with Dad's body before stating, "Lord Hokage, I guess you can try carrying him. Don't worry about dropping him, he's got a hard head."_

And that is how Dad got stuck piggyback Taka. _Eh, better him than me even if I got stuck with the mini demon._ Now, Boruto had learned his lesson. Never say the word demon around Taka and Beni because bad things happen. Hell, Boruto doesn't even remember what he had been saying that first day when Beni jumped him. He knows that he said demon twice, the first ticked off Beni and the second really ticked off Taka. Oh well, doesn't matter now. He'll just won't say it anymore if it upsets them so much. _But why?_

"Lord Hokage, can you use chakra chains like Taka?" Immediately, the father and son both tensed at the girl's question. Boruto glanced up at his father, who had a faraway look in his eyes.

"Honestly, Benihime, I never learned how to." Dad confessed. Boruto didn't have to look at her to know that her mouth was dropped.

"No, no, no." She muttered, before she said. "We need to have an inter, inter… Boruto?" Um, she wanted him to fill in the word for her… Ok, then...

"Um, intervention?" Boruto asked more than stated but-

"Yes! Intervention! This isn't right! You and you and Hima need lessons!" Beni declared. "Five in the morning, don't be late!" How can Taka ever say no to her? She's absolutely terrifying!

"Well, son, you heard the little lady."

"Great…"

Aunt Ino and Uncle Sai were hosting the Konoha 12 dinner this time around. Not that there was anything wrong with Aunt Ino's house ( _please don't hit me_ ), but Aunt Ino kind of gave Boruto the creeps ( _pretty please_ ). It was just her and her eyes. And, yeah, that statement was ironic seeing as he was half-Hyuga. However, Aunt Ino could just look at you and you'll say bye-bye to any secret you had. And yes, he was speaking from experience but that was a story for another day.

"Boruto! Go get the others, we have to hurry or were going to be late!"

"And it won't be my fault this time!"

"Naruto!" Mom scolded Dad before Boruto moved to Hima's room first. After the whole teddy bear incident (never again), Boruto and Himawari agreed to never enter the other's room unless they knocked or were getting attacked by enemies. Unfortunately, Hima liked to ignore him whenever he knocked. She was passive-aggressive like that.

"Come on, Hima. We got to go." His knocks got progressively louder the more he waited. Shit, what did he do now to piss her off? Um, no, wasn't that. No, she got over that last week. Maybe it was-

"WHAT?!" Hima screeched, yanking the door, her byakugan activated. Boruto flinched back because Hima was in a bad mood if the 'Really Scary Glow of Doom' was anything to go by. (Duh, duh, DUH!)

"Um-"

"Kids, hurry up, we're leaving in 5!" Dad called. Hima blinked, her byakugan falling as the realization hit her.

"Boruto, when's dinner?"

"About 5 minutes- hmpf!"

"Ah, why didn't you get me sooner?!" She demanded as she pushed past him in a hurry to get to the bathroom. He blinked, before shaking his head. Girls. Well, time to get Beni and Taka. _Taka can't still be sleeping… could he?_

Luckily, all of the yelling had awoken their guest as Taka opened the door just as Boruto was about to knock. Taka yawned, before nodding to him.

"Morning."

"… Dude, it's still nighttime."

"Really? Huh, you're right. Sorry about that. Sounded a lot like mornings back at home." Taka drawled before cracking his back. Then, his eyes widened and he straightened.

"Who carried me here?" Taka asked.

"Lord Hokage did!" Beni exclaimed as she jumped onto Boruto's shoulder, which _totally_ did not scare the crap out of him, thank you very much. (Lies, all lies…) How did she do that anyway? And there was this little thing called personal space, Beni…

"And I didn't attack him?"

"You actually do that?"

"Yep! You did good, Taka."

"Well, damn…"

"Sure, ignore my questions. I see how it is." Boruto grumbled, causing Taka to smirk at him.

"Tough luck, man. Got to make sure that one stays happy, you know." Taka said, nodding to Beni before Dad yelled,

"Kids, let's go!"

Boruto turned to move away. As he did, he noticed out of the corner of his eyes that Taka paused. He almost looked whimsical and lost in thought. And it wasn't Taka that acted differently in that second. Beni's grip on Boruto tightened before it returned back to normal. It was almost as if, they were reminded of something or someone. Nah, that couldn't be it… could it?

The Yamanaka household was bustling when they arrived. Aunt Ino had gone overbroad again. The house was spotless and there was peaceful jazz music playing in the background. Too bad the war in the kitchen was disturbing the peaceful scene.

"Pig! If you don't stir the onions, they're going to burn!"

"Shut up, Forehead! I'm not going to listen to someone who's burned water before!"

"That was one time and you know it!"

"Ino, why is there no room in your fridge? And who the hell made the mochi?!"

"It was my turn to make the mochi, Karui! The last time you did it, you mixed up the sugar with the salt!"

"I'll have you know-" Crash!

"Forehead, you clumsy idiot!"

"Not again…" Mom, bless her soft soul, sighed as she walked passed Inojin, who had let them into his crowded house. She took a deep breathe and marched into the danger zone.

"Hinata! Tell Forehead that-"

"Hinata! Tell Pig that-" Yep, just your regular Konoha 12 dinner.

The others had been smart enough to stay out of the firing zone. Mira's head shot up from her game of shogi as they entered, Shikadai moving one piece forward. They were sitting with the other genin. She waved them over as Dad moved to speak with the men. Motoko was sleeping again, her head pillowed against Uncle Shikamaru's lap as he and Sasuke-Sensei discussed something serious.

"Hey guys! Taka, you're alive!" Mira teased, elbowing the dirty blonde. He rolled his eyes but there was smirk on his face. You know, it was kind of odd how they always made sure that they were near each other. Nah, he was over thinking things again.

"Shut up. Huh, you're actually losing?" Taka spoke as he analyzed the board. The other genin stared at him in shock, causing him to look up.

"What?"

"You know how to played shogi?" Chocho asked slowly.

"Yeah."

"You, an Uzumaki, know how to play shogi?" Hey, what the hell was that supposed to mean, Inojin?! Thankfully, Taka felt just as insulted as he did.

"Excuse you, we maybe dense, but we are not idiots."

"No, you're a dumbass." Mira stated, placing her piece down. "And I'm actually winning, right Dai?" _Dai?_

"For now." Shikadai answered before Chocho groaned dramatically. She threw herself back against Shikadai's and Sarada's back, nearly wrecking the board.

"How much longer?" She whined. "I'm hungry." She glared at Inojin, pointing the question at him.

"Don't look at me."

"It's your house, go ask."

"Screw that, I'm not going in there."

"Uncle Sai, Inojin isn't being a good host!"

"Inojin, remember what your mother said."

"Yeah, yeah. Be a good host, get the girls something to drink, offer your chair up, blah, blah, blah." Inojin grumbled. "Wish me luck. If I die, tell my father I love him and that Mom did it." With that, the brave Yamanaka marched into no man's land.

"Bless his soul." The boys said in prayer as the girls sweat-dropped.

"Anyway…" Mira started, turning to face Taka. "How are the seals going?"

Her question caused everyone to turn towards Taka, even the men in the room shifted and paused. Taka sighed and glared at her with a 'really, right now?' look in his eyes. She shot back with a 'of course, right now.' Then he flicked his wrist.

Pop! In a puff of smoke, there was a little notepad now resting in Taka's palm. The pages looked absolutely covered with notes and ink. Taka tossed the pad to Mira before Beni and Hima could steal it from him.

"Aw…"

"Not now, girls." Taka scolded. "What do you think? Anything jogging your memory?" Mira scolded, her eyes narrowing as she scanned the pages. A tick mark formed over her forehead.

"No, nothing. Did you even sleep last night?" She asked in an annoyed tone, as if she already knew the answer.

"Of course, I did."

"Not even a wink." Taka and Beni said at the same time. Taka turned to look at his little sister, the fake hurt written on his face as Beni stuck her tongue out at him.

"Oh, is that so?" Mira said sarcastically. "And here I was, worried that you wouldn't eat. Now I have to worry about you not sleeping. Troublesome…"

"Shut up and tell me what you think of the seals."

Taka's demand caused silence to fill the living room. Mira reached up into her hair and pulled a senbon out of her bun. She stuck in between her lips, like it was a cigarette, and bit down on it. She stared at the pages, concentrating on the squibbles of kanji. After a few moments, she pulled the senbon out and used it as pointer.

"There, the seals are missing something. Everything else looks fine until you actually try to overlap the two seals." She stated firmly, causing Taka to look over her shoulder. Naturally, this caused everyone else to do the same.

The senbon was pointing at an image of circle with kanji splitting it down the middle. Wait a second… Boruto realized that the circle wasn't just a plain circle. Oh no, it was a circle made out of the kanji for the twelve months. The kanji repeated itself, making it appear infinite. Inside the circle was a familiar looking kanji. A hand shot out and stole the pad from Mira.

Old Man Kakashi stood before them, Mirai standing off to the side in caution. When he arrived, who the hell knows because quite frankly, it wasn't important. What was important was that Old Man Kakashi looked tensed. He tossed the pad to Naruto, like he couldn't believe what he just read.

"Naruto, what is the seal in the middle?" Old Man Kakashi asked. But Boruto could tell that he already knew the answer.

"… Takashi, how in the hell did you get ahold of the Flying Thunder God Seal?" Dad demanded, the seriousness etched into his face as the other men leaned over to look at the notes. Taka shot a 'look at what you've done now' look to Mira before muttering something under his breathe. Then he straightened, staring everyone dead straight in the eye.

"It's my birthright."

"Dinner!" Inojin, your timing sucks… Well, at least it can't get any worse-

"Hello, my youthful friends! Metal and I have returned from our 200th laps around the village!" God dammit…

 **Author's Note - Aw, cliffhangers, what would we do without you? So, what do you guys think? I got the idea for Taka's taijutsu style from the Vanderbilt's Newport mansion and I think it works well. And this chapter and last chapter were more Taka centric because, while Mira is the main character, so is Taka and its kinda his fault that they're in this mess in the first place. Or is it? Either way, let me know if you like how I write my action scenes. Personally, I can visualize fight scene better when a watcher describes it verses the fighter. But review your thoughts, feelings, ideas and I'll take everything into consideration! So, review, favorite and follow! I'm going to try to fix my grammar in all of my chapters too (God help me) so hopefully the reading will be easier for you guys! Alright, love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	7. Man, I Feel Like a Woman

**Author's Note - Hey guys! Happy New Year! To celebrate, we have a new chapter, yeah! So, before I do my normal list, I have a very important service announcement to make. Kids, don't smoke. Shikamaru Nara smokes because he is an anime character. And no matter how cool it makes him look (trust me, I know), smoking is bad for us actual humans. Thank you, we'll bring you back to your regularly scheduled program. So, first thing on the list, I've left a hint in the title and that is all that you need to know. Second, yeah, it may seem a little like, oh the dimension-hoppers are getting along with everyone just fine, but in reality, that's only true for most people. Three, remember the numbers, guys. Numbers are important. That vague enough for you guys? Great! On to the story!**

Chapter 7: Man, I Feel Like a Woman

 _Shikadai_

"Ok, I'm going to make this a quick as possible because I didn't slave over that meal only for it to go cold." Aunt Ino ordered as she stood before Taka, her arms crossed. She didn't look that upset though, as if she's been waiting for this moment. After Taka's declaration and the Lees impromptu arrival, the women in the kitchen had entered the living room to see what all of the fuss was about. After a brief summary of what occurred, the Lord Hokage gave Aunt Ino permission to interrogate Taka.

"Yes ma'am." Taka nodded in agreement.

Shikadai watched on from his spot next to Mira and Beni. Both girls gave off an odd air to them. As if they were both petrified and at peace all at once. Like this moment was the inevitable that they have been waiting for since their arrival. Mira was standing with her shoulders back, every muscle tensed. Beni was leaning against her, her little arms wrapped around the brunette's thin waist. Flaking them was the other genin, all watching with baited breath.

The adults surrounded the pair in the middle of the room. More specifically, they stood near the exits, prepared to catch a runner. Only Shikadai's father didn't stand at attention. During the hoopla, Motoko had burst into inconsolable tears, worrying not just the room and her sister but his father as well. The little girl had thrown herself from Dad's arms and sprinted to Taka's legs. Once there, she wrapped herself around the boy, speaking through the tears,

"Don't hurt, Taka!" Over and over again, looking at Aunt Ino in absolute fear. It had taken the combined effort of Mira, Taka, and Dad to assure her that no, Aunt Ino wasn't going to hurt Taka, she just had a few questions. Even still, the child was still clingy and would only leave Taka for Dad.

"You understand why we're doing this, Takashi?" The Lord Hokage asked softly. He looked pained, as if he never wanted this to happen and that he despised the very fact that it was happening. Taka took it in stride and shrugged.

"Honestly sir, I was expecting this sooner. I get it though. You've got a village to protect and I happen to have one of its secrets. Go ahead with your questions, ma'am. I've got nothing to hide." Taka stated firmly. Aunt Ino stared him down, her Head of T&I persona kicking in.

"What's your name?"

"Takashi Uzumaki."

"How long have you been a shinobi for?"

"A year."

"Alright, you're telling the truth. Tell me, you claim that the Flying Thunder God Seal is your birthright. Is this true?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"Through my mother."

Shikadai couldn't stop his eyes as they glanced over to Himawari. The Uzumaki girl was standing next to her brother, her blue Hyuga eyes locked on the show before them. Shikadai flicked his view from her to Taka to her again. They did look similar. Shikadai then compared Taka to Himawari's father and brother. He frowned. Yes, the possibility was there. Takashi Uzumaki could be the son of Himawari.

Yet, Shikadai doubted his own conclusion. There was something about Taka, his mannerism, his attitude, his tone of voice that tossed the possibility out of the window. Taka and his heritage was an enigma that refused to be solved. There was something else, something else that he, Shikadai Nara, the son of a genius, refused to see. _But what?_

"So, you are Uzumakis through your mother and that you are also related to the Fourth Hokage?" Aunt Ino asked.

"Yes." Taka stated firmly, his resolution unwavering. Aunt Ino continued to stare at him before turning to face her boss.

"He's telling the truth." She confirmed.

There was a plethora of sighs of relief that filled the room. Hell, he sighed with relief. Taka was a cool guy and clearly, he was important to Mira and Motoko to cause such strong emotions from them. Shikadai shuttered to think what they would do if Taka was dragged away by ANBU. Either way, the situation was over and Taka was cleared-

"Read him." Sarada's father ordered, his visible eye staring Taka down. Lord Hokage tensed and pivoted to glared at his friend. He purposefully stood between the Uchiha patriarch and Taka. Contrary to popular belief, Shikadai did not sleep through all of his academy lessons. Shino-Sensei's history lessons was the one section that Shikadai didn't nap through. Especially when Shino-Sensei was talking about their current Hokage's life. One of Shino-Sensei's most important points was that Naruto Uzumaki was and still is an orphan who was ostracized by the village for being the human prison of the Ninetails. The boy had no one, no friends, no family. No one. So, this revelation that Takashi, and thus, Benihime, were members of his clan and his family in more ways than one, it was no wonder that the man looked ready to kill for them.

"He's telling the truth, Sasuke." Lord Hokage reminded his friend, causing the stoic man to surprisingly nodded in agreement.

"Yes, he is. He's still hiding something." Sasuke Uchiha explained.

"I'm a shinobi, sir. It's part of my job." Taka chided, trying to add some light to the situation. "It's fine though. You can read me, ma'am. It'll put everyone at ease."

There was a sharp, barely audible in take in breath by Mira. Shikadai glanced at her. Her arms were now wrapped around Beni, gripping the redette firmly against her form. Mira looked two shades paler and her eyes were laced with worry. Beni wasn't doing much better. She burrowed herself into the older girl, shielding herself away from the scene as her smaller body shook. Thankfully, Motoko had cried herself to sleep or else she would have made another scene. Shikadai reached over to grip Mira's shoulder, causing her to nod in thanks.

Obviously, Shikadai wasn't the only one to notice the girls' distress, though Mira hid it well. You could feel it though, their fear and worry with an undertone of betrayal. To them, this was the end. The guilt pouring from the adults was almost as palpable. In the two days, hell, had it only been two days? In the two days these kids had been here, it was like they've been here their entire lives. It was like they were family…

Actually, they were family now and that made the situation all the more soul crushing.

"I don't take orders from you, Sasuke." Aunt Ino sneered, turning herself to glare harshly at the boy she once fawned over. Even she had grown fond of the time-traveling quartet. "I'm not doing anything to this child," she pointed back at Taka, her stance widening slightly, "without either an order from the Hokage or permission from his guardian."

"He's hiding something." Sasuke reiterated causing her to roll her eyes.

"Maybe your years of soul searching and wandering made you forget but I'm actually a loyal shinobi." Ouch, low blow. "And so is Takashi Uzumaki. Naruto, do you want me to read him?"

"No, I believe him."

At the Hokage's order, the tension dissipated from the room. Under his hand, Mira relaxed and Beni looked up in joy. She removed herself from Mira only to soar across the room. Catching the Hokage by surprise, Beni jumped up into his arms and squeezed his neck.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" She squealed, kissed his cheek before dropping down and doing the same thing to Aunt Ino. Aunt Ino laughed and kept the girl on her hip, turning to face the room.

"Now, can we please enjoy our meal?"

Dinner was definitely better now that the air had clearly. Everyone was chatting and laughing as the adults spun their stories about the good old days.

"-Poor Ayame, she must have gained at least 40 pounds just by eating the Ninja Chefs' food." Sakura commented as her, Uncle Choji and Uncle Naruto recounted the time they had to save the ramen girl. Now that the group was relaxing, Uncle Naruto could finally stop acting like a Hokage and relax with his friends and family.

Everyone were seated in clusters by families. The Yamanakas sat at the head, with Aunt Ino leading the feasting. Next to them were the Akimichis and the Naras, completing the Ino-Shika-Cho trio. Next were the Uchihas and the Lees, which a disaster waiting to happen. Lastly, were the Uzumakis, and their guests, Taka, Beni, Lord Sixth and Mirai. Uncle Naruto sat directly across from Aunt Ino, as a way to respect his position while being in the sacred Yamanaka compound.

"You guys have some wild stories." Mira commented from her seat across from Shikadai. She was seated next to his Dad so that when Motoko wakes up, if she ever woke up, Mira could get her plate ready. Across from Dad was Mom, who looked odd. She appeared upset but seemed to be forcing it down, faking her smile. And Dad was ignoring her, focusing his attention only on his food, the stories and not waking Motoko sooner than necessary.

Sans Motoko, this scene was nothing new in Shikadai's house. When it first happened four, nearly five, years ago, Shikadai didn't know what to do or what had caused the overwhelming silence. The first year was the worst. There were days where Mom would screech at Dad over the table, for doing as little as asking her to pass the pepper. Or there were the days were neither spoke, neither ate and Shikadai couldn't stomach the food before him. And then, there were the fights that occurred when they sent him to bed. He never could understand the words that were exchanged but most nights, Dad left the house, slamming the door as he left so that he could crash at Grandma Yoshino, Aunt Ino, or Uncle Choji's. And Mom would slam the bedroom door and act like nothing happened in the morning. It had gotten better as Shikadai got older. All of his troublesome behavior at the academy distracted his parents from their turmoil and made them almost normal.

But since that night when Motoko stared down his mother, Mom has had this vendetta against the girls, especially Motoko. Mom would flinch and look pained whenever she glanced at Dad cradling the harmless, sleepy child or if Mira challenged Dad to a game of shogi. They had triggered this behavior in his mother.

Yet, Shikadai couldn't find it in himself to blame them. The years of unresolved strain on his parents' marriage needed at catalyst, either to save it or raze it. Who was he to blame two lost girls who had nothing but the clothes off their backs? They maybe the catalyst but they weren't the cause. There was no room his heart to hate them, because they were already his sisters.

"Tell us about your Konoha!" Hima's question shook Shikadai out of his thoughts. With the rest of the table, their eyes roamed until they landed on Taka, who the question was pointed to. Beni, who had been having an eating contest with Boruto, stopped abruptly, a piece of tuna falling out of her chopsticks. Across from him, Mira looked onto and nodded. Taka snorted, throwing his hands behind his head. There was a devilish smirk on his lips.

"I'm not a good story teller. Mira is." Taka stated, nodding his head to Mira. "She has the photographic memory, after all." _Shit, really? What a drag…_

"And I will remember this, jackass." Mira muttered under her breathe as the room's attention landed on her.

"Troublesome, where should I start? Well, our Konoha is extremely similar to this one. With all of the technology and what not. The most obvious difference is that our Hokage's a woman." Mira started, playing with her food as she spoke.

"Our Hokage is a wise woman. And she's beautiful. The Lady Hokage is married and has four children with her husband, who looks at her as if she's an angel on earth. Milady lost nearly all of her clan before she was born and had to fight tooth and nail to get where she is now. The best way to describe her is that she a warrior. The fools who dare to underestimate her ability, her drive, her strength is either dead at her feet or changed for the better. And yet, through all that she's been through, she's merciful. There are times I question what the village did to deserve her because frankly, we don't. She too good, too powerful, too saintly to be something as mundane as our Hokage. She's too good for us."

The silence was deafening. Through Mira's ambiguous yet enlightening words, all Shikadai could picture was paradox of a woman. A puzzle so contradictory that it seemed impossible to unravel. In her sentences, Mira spoke her love and devotion to this Lady Hokage, while saying nothing at all. _Just who is this woman?... And why does it sound so damn familiar?!_

A clap broke the silence. It was Beni who clapped, a smile spread across her face.

"Sounds about right!" Beni confirmed as her brother nodded in agreement. Even Motoko, who was suddenly wake, clapped softly.

"Well, would you look at who's awake?" Mira chided as Shikadai passed her the empty plate that was next to him. "What'll it be, Motoko? Rice and salmon?"

But the child shook her head and shielded her face against Dad's shoulder. Mira's face fell slightly. She continued to pile the plate and divided the fish into manageable pieces. She reached over, gently rubbing the child's back. The room was still watching them, analyzing the girls' every move.

"Come on, Momo. You've got to eat. Mom won't be happy if she found out that you were sleeping through dinner again." Mira tried to joke. Motoko tightened her grip against Dad. She was probably choking him now. But Dad took it in stride.

"I want to go home…" Motoko's soft voice cut through the room.

"I miss Mommy and Daddy. I miss our Konoha. I miss our house. I want Daddy." Perhaps it was the fact that Motoko barely spoke but just her opening her tiny mouth silenced the entire room. The adults exchanged glances, the girl's soft whimper tugging at their heartstrings. Well, expect Sasuke but he was a hard-ass, deadbeat dad so who cared about what he thought? Shikadai certainly didn't.

"I'll get us home, Motoko, no matter what." Taka promised. Mira nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, don't you worry! Taka and Mira are on the case!" Mira stated with a smile, poking her little sister, causing Motoko to look at her. In an un-Nara like move, Mira gave her sister a thumb up and winked. _Where have I seen that before?_

"We'll be home before you know it! We don't make promises we can't keep, right Taka?"

"Well, there was the one time- ow!" Mira had chunked her chopsticks at him. But that got Motoko to chuckle.

"See, Taka's being a goofball again. Who knows what else he'll do if we keep him here for too long?" Mira teased at the boy's expanse. Taka took it in stride because Motoko was happy again, and that was all that mattered. "Now, will you please eat something?"

Her sister's plea, Motoko sat up in Dad's arms and stared at him. Dad sighed, before using his free arm to grab Motoko's plate and chopsticks. Now ecstatic, Motoko maneuvered herself so that she was in his lap, scarfing down the plate in lightening speed.

Blink, blink.

"More please!" How can someone so small eat that much food so quickly?

"And she's back!" Beni cheered. Mira ticked, flicking her sister's forehead.

"Motoko, don't forget your manners. You didn't thank Lady Yamanaka for the food." Mira scolded. Motoko blinked before shifting towards the head of the table where Aunt Ino sat. Motoko bowed her head as deeply as she could from her seat.

"Please for- for- Mira?"

"Forgive."

"Please forgive me, Lady Yamanaka. Thank you for the meal." Motoko apologized causing Aunt Ino to laugh and wave her hand.

"You guys are all so polite. Take notes, Inojin." Inojin groaned 'Mom…' but that didn't stop her. "You're welcome, sweetheart. Eat as much as you want. There's plenty to go around."

Dinner had finished without anymore hitches and soon Shikadai was laying his bed, ready to fall asleep. Belly full and warm, clean sheets, man, this is the life.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" His mother's whisper rang through the quiet compound. From the shadows creaking from under his door, his parents stood before his door in the hallway.

"Not now, Temari-" Dad tried to walk away, but Mom's voice stopped him.

"Not now, ok, then when? Or are you going to ignore the fucking elephant in the room? Like you always do? Like the coward that your father said you were?" Her voice was getting progressively louder with each question.

Shikadai should get up. He should be running from his bed. He should be wrenching his door open and screaming at them to stop fighting, because it hurt, it fucking hurt when they were fighting like this. When his mother's fury made her spill whatever vile bile she kept hidden, not caring who she hurt because she was hurt first and she was too hurt to care. When his father avoided the situation, not because he was a coward but because he was at a loss for words and nothing he could think of in his genius brain could make the situation better. Shikadai did nothing though. He just sat and listened as his mother continued.

"I've never felt so unwelcomed in my own goddamn home! I can feel it; their condescending looks that say that I shouldn't be the Lady Nara! How dare I be the Lady Nara?! How dare I be your wife?!"

"They are-"

"I want them out." Mom had hissed that line out but Dad's reaction was immediate. His fist slammed against the hallway wall, causing Shikadai's room to tremble.

"No." His voice was as clear as it was unwavering. The shadows that lite Shikadai's room showed Mom turning away from Dad, her shoulders shaking. She hissed her last words as she walked away to their bedroom.

"They can't replace it and you know it."

Shikadai laid in his bed and waited. He waited for his mother to slam the master bedroom door. He waited for Dad to unfreeze himself after what felt like hours of him not moving. Dad didn't bother using the front door. He found the nearest window, opened it and was gone. He was gone.

"I'm sorry." Shikadai shot up in his bed to stare at Mira, who had appeared from the shadowy corner in his bedroom. She had used the shadows to travel between their rooms. The fact that she could do that was amazing but Shikadai barely focused on that.

All of his attention was focused on the girl before him. She looked like she had rolled out of bed, her usually neat hair impersonating a bird's nest. Her eyes were pointed towards the floor, as if she was ashamed of herself. She shifted her weight from foot to foot before looking back at him. Then, she bowed deeply.

"I'm so sorry, Dai. For causing you and your parents so much trouble. Motoko and I won't bother you guys anymore. I'll start packing in the morning and we'll be-"

"Mira, stop!" Shikadai nearly shouted, stopping her ramblings.

"Neither of you are going anywhere." Shikadai ordered, reaching out to grip the girl's shaking shoulders.

"But we-"

"Whatever that was has been happening for years. You too have nothing to be sorry for. Besides," Shikadai paused, smiling at her. "You guys are troublesome girls but you're our troublesome girls."

Mira stared at him, her blue eyes locking with his teal ones. They fell back onto his bed as she tackled hugged him. If this was any other girl, he would have been blushing fiercely at their situation. Inside, he clutched her just as tightly as she did him, leaning against each other as their emotions swarmed them. They cried into each other, Mira releasing her stress and he doing the same thing. After the crying feast, they separated and wished each other good night.

 _Man, they're troublesome. But, they're worth it. Every last bit._

Then a thought struck him. Eyes widen open, Shikadai sat up in a cold sweat. He shifted so that he was staring at the wall that divided his room from the girls.

 _If Taka and Beni are Himawari's children, could Mira and Motoko be… my children?_

 **Meanwhile: in Konoha 2.0**

 _Naruto_

Over with the right strand, grab a piece of hair, lay it over the middle strand. Over with the left strand, grab another piece of hair, lay it over the middle strand. Repeat the process. _Aw fuck it_. Racking her fingers through her hair, Naruto undid the awful braid. Guess tonight was a hair down type of night.

Her hands were stilling shaking slightly as Naruto continued to comb her blonde hair. Must be the nerves, a jacked-up concoction of overwhelming worry and adrenaline. The house was so quiet that it was smothering her. The only noise in the house was Shikamaru as he took his nightly shower. Yoshino and Granny had left, with the promise that they'll be back in the morning to prepare everything. The two women had been her rock through the entirety of Naruto's teenage life and these past two days, they were god sends. But tomorrow, this will all be over and she will be cradling her children in her arms _or_ _else it will get ugly._

Shikamaru had cranked the code and it had taken every ounce of their will power not to run head first and recreate Takashi's amazing stupid seal. In fact, she was ready to do just that when Shikamaru stopped and talked some sense into her (sometimes his Talk no Jutsu skills were better than her own, specially when he used his stupid, genius logic). They would be no good to their kids sleep-deprived and underprepared. And, as horrifying as the thought was, they need to be at their best in case- she flinched, in case they had to completely eradicate whoever harmed their babies. (Those people better pray that not a single hair is missing from any of her children or she will have absolutely no problem going ultra Kurama, Sage, Kick-ass Kunoichi mode!)

Dimension hopping. Only her children could successfully create a way to travel through dimensions. Perhaps this was payback for some of the shit that she did earlier in her life (none of which was her fault, thank you very much, she just happened to be at the wrong place and the wrong time- Stop rolling your eyes, Shikamaru!) Really though, only her children could do this, which is why they are grounded for the rest of their life.

 ** _A little harsh, don't you think?_** Kurama asked, dragging her in for a conversation.

 _You're right, Benihime and Motoko have nothing to do with this. The twins are so grounded!_ She agreed as the beast snorted.

 ** _I told you this would happen._** Here he goes again. **_What were you going to expect mating with a boy who had an IQ over 200 and played with shadows?_**

 _Good sex?_

 ** _Besides the obvious, you were either going to have weak offspring or mini-powerhouses who might actually succeed in taking over the world just for shits and giggles. Or two worlds, it seems._**

 _Ha ha, very funny. Your belief in them is astonishing._

 ** _What's truly astonishing is that you know what that word means._** She rolled her eyes at him and flipped him off before exiting her mindscape.

Standing, Naruto moved from her vanity to the bed before flopping into the pillows. Ugh, Kurama was being annoying again. At least, the stupid fur-ball was just as worried about the kids as she was. Even if he would never admit that he was actually a big softy for little kids. God, she was tired. And her nerves were shot. Was this what she made Shikaku and Yoshino feel whenever she dragged Shikamaru into her adventures? Great, now she felt worried and guilty.

"What's with that face?" Her husband's baritone voice rang out as he exited their bathroom. She kept her eyes to the ceiling, before throwing her arm over them and groaning,

"I owe your mother an apology… and some flowers. Is this what she felt whenever you and I did something stupid?"

"Yes, but usually we ended up saving the world so we kind of made up for it."

"Honestly, that doesn't make me feel better." Naruto stated as she sat up. And while normally she would take the time to appreciate his body, he had an amazing ass and his abs (yum), they were too exhausted and worried to do anything naughty. Which was a damn shame because they haven't had a free night in what, two months. Stupid Chunin Exams and alien invaders. Oh well, they had been creative. There was reason that their offices had sofas. And desks. And the floors… No wonder they had four kids.

"Well, we've figured out the seal so we'll be tucking them in tomorrow." Shikamaru commented as he pulled up his pajama bottoms. He had a pajama shirt, key word being had. She may have stolen it. Eh, it not like he ever wore it anyway.

"After we chew them out?"

"Of course." He agreed immediately, pulling back the sheets and climbing in. Then he reached over to the bedside table, pulling out one of his reports.

"I thought we agreed not to bring work to bed."

"We also said we wouldn't bring bed to work and that went so well." Shikamaru said sarcastically, causing her to flush. It wasn't her fault that she goes through heat… stupid fur-ball.

"Besides, I thought you would want to read this one." He passed the paper over. "Apparently, the twins had applied to do a test-run for the Jonin Exams earlier this week."

"What?" She asked, snatching the paper from him. "They haven't passed all of the qualifications. And Takashi's too lazy to put in the effort to take a test early."

"But his twin isn't." Shikamaru pointed out as she continued to scan the papers. "Normally Kiba and I would have green-lighted their request but given everything's that happened-"

"Denied until their probation is over." Naruto stated firmly, before she paused to amend it. "Or until I say so. Whichever comes first."

Her husband snorted as she tossed the paperwork away from the bed. They'll clean it up later. She reached up to comb her fingers through his slightly wet hair (it was sexy when he had his hair down) before laying against him, trying to get comfortable. His arm wrapped itself around her tiny waist before he leaned down to peck her forehead.

"You're not going to sleep, are you?" Shikamaru asked, causing her to give him a guilty smile. "Tch, Troublesome Wife."

"Lazy Husband." She answered back. "Like you've slept at all."

He stayed silent as she reached over to shut off the lights.

"I love you." Naruto whispered as she hovered over Shikamaru. In the darkness, his eyes seemed to glow. They softened before he kissed her gently.

"I love you too. Get some sleep." As their bedroom pitched into darkness and silence, Naruto tried to sleep. She was almost there when-

"LADY HOKAGE! WE HAVE RETURNED FROM SUNA AT A MOST YOUTHFUL PACE WITH- EH, OH, OW!" Thunk, thunk!

Lee was founded pinned to the wall across from their bed by her kunai and Shikamaru's trench knife as Shikamaru flicked on the light switch. With his entire Suna Mission squad, in her bedroom. Now, being the Hokage and before that, the wife of the Jonin Commander, she was used to people showing up at her house (and bedroom) unannounced. It came with the job. With it, came a rule which was-

"Lee, someone better be dying." Yep, there it was.

"It appears that we've interrupted something, Washboard."

"Really, Sai, what gave it away?" Naruto replied sarcastically as she sat up. It was a good thing she actually wore her nightgown. Though, it wouldn't be the first time someone's seen her looking less than decent. At least Hinata had the decency to blush. Not that she could ever stay mad at Hinata.

"Hn." Which translated from Uchihaniese into 'Nice outfit, Dobe.'

"Bastard, I don't have the patience to deal with your assholeness right now."

"What do you guys want?" Shikamaru complained, throwing himself back into the pillows. "We were actually sleeping. For the first time in two days."

"Uh, I'm sorry Naruto, Shikamaru. We just wanted to let you guys know that the villages couldn't find the kids anywhere but they're going to keep looking." Ten-Ten apologized.

…

"That's why we called you guys back. We already know that." Shikamaru said slowly. Naruto could feel a tick mark forming. The group before them blinked.

"Oh…" They all said.

"Alright, everyone, out of my bedroom! I want you all here at 800 hours for your full report and next time, read the entire damn summons! I told you guys to report back in the morning!" Naruto ordered.

"It is the morning." Not the point, Shino.

"Get out…" Shikamaru and Naruto ordered, the annoyance laced in their tone. Thankfully, Hinata got the message. She bowed deeply, before getting Lee off of the wall.

"We're sorry, guys. Have a good night." Hinata said and with that, the group left in hurry.

"What are we going to do with them?"

"Stick them at the Academy for two weeks?"

"Seems like an abuse of power."

"That's never stopped us before."

"True, let's do it!"

"Troublesome Wife."

"Lazy Husband." She kissed him before tucking back against him and falling into a restless sleep.

The early morning training was as heartbreaking as it was nostalgic. It reminded Naruto of the first time she learned about the Naras super-secret training. That had been a weird day.

 _She was around eleven. Earlier that day, some civilian drunkards had thought that trashing her apartment while she wasn't there was a brilliant idea in their tiny, pea sized waste of shape they called brains. It wasn't the first time that it happened, but it had been the first time Shikamaru had seen some of the truly sad details about her life at the time (mainly because she did her absolute best to hide it from him)._

 _The pair had been friends since the day she switched into their class, when she had left a whoopy cushion on Iruka-Sensei's chair. This triggered a cream pie to fall on him, once again proving that classic pranks were honestly the best. Of course, she was sent to wait in the hallway. After five minutes of utter boredom, Shikamaru had been sent out to join her because 'If you like to sleep so much, do it where we can't hear you snore!' And to Iruka-Sensei's absolute horror when she, his honorary little sister, confessed to him that they (Shikamaru and her) had been dating for nearly a year (probably more than that actually), and she couldn't tell him because of the Akatsuki and the war, and oh yeah, they got married during the war (oops). Anyway, Iruka-Sensei was the reason they were friends to begin with._

 _Later on, Shikamaru confessed to her that in the beginning, the main reason he hung out with her was because she was an enigma that he wanted to figure out. That reasoning lasted for a week until he realized that he actually enjoyed her presence and wanted to be her friend. The rest as they say, is history._

 _Back to the training. Shikamaru had insisted on walking her home that day from the academy. Something about her being a troublesome danger magnet and that it was a drag but someone needed to make sure she got home in one piece. Doesn't he have a way with words? Anyway, they had arrived at her apartment and when Naruto pushed her key into the lock, the door swung open._

 _"_ _What the?" Shikamaru questioned as she froze. Before she could stop him, he pushed the door open all of the way and entered the little apartment. Graffiti covered the walls that she had just cleaned earlier that week. The words 'bitch' and 'demon' littered the scene. Her few plates were smashed to pieces and her fridge had been raid. Left over bottles of alcohol covered every inch of her floor. Her windowsill garden, which she had worked very hard on, thank you very much, was uprooted, the soil dirtying her floor. She didn't want to see they did to her bedroom, especially with the smell of urine that was coming from said room. Looks like she'll be sleeping on the floor again._

 _"_ _Um," Naruto started, rubbing the back of her neck as she approached her friend. He was still inspecting the apartment and barely acknowledged her._

 _"_ _Well, it looks like I need to go grocery shopping again. And I better start cleaning. I hope they didn't get my clothes again. It sucks having to wear the same underwear for a few weeks. Thanks for walking me home, Shikamaru. Shikamaru?" She was rambling nervously again, trying to stay positive. On the bright side, at least she wasn't here when they did it this time. But now that Shikamaru saw how people really, like really, hated her, he wasn't going to be her friend anymore, and he would leave and she couldn't blame him because why would he be friends with a demon like-_

 _But then, Shikamaru turned to face her. She had never seen such a furious expression on her lazy friend before now. Normally, he faked his annoyance and anger, mainly because he liked ticking people off and was too lazy to actually get angry. But this, this was pure, unadulterated anger._

 _"_ _Shika-" She called out again, only to have him gently but firmly grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the ruined place. He didn't speak or let go, no matter how many times she tried talking to him or shaking him off. Eventually, she gave up and let him drag her. After a while, she noticed that they were headed to the clan compounds of the Akimichis, Yamanakas and Naras. They arrived at his house with him slamming the door open. Yoshino whipped her head out of the kitchen while Shikaku looked up from his game of shogi. Shikamaru didn't even let her take off her shoes as they entered the living room._

 _"_ _Shikamaru?" Yoshino asked in shock. She too was shocked by the apparent emotions that adorned her son's face. Shikaku had his thinking warrior look on, his eyes glancing between the two children before him._

 _"_ _Mom, Dad, Naruto's going to be staying with us." Naruto whipped her head around to give a look that can only be described as 'Huh?' Shikamaru ignored her confused expression, releasing the grip on her wrist so that he could hold her hand instead. Now, if she was a normal ten-year-old, her reaction to a boy holding her hand should have been 'ew, cooties.' But, Naruto craved touch and squeezed his hand back just as tightly. Besides, it was Shikamaru. Yoshino and Shikaku shared a worried look before Shikaku asked his son,_

 _"_ _What happened?"_

 _Now, the Naras knew how unpopular she was in the villages and even before she became Shikamaru's friend, the lazy clan had always treated her well. Shikaku frequently badgered her ANBU team to make sure that they actually did their job, especially if Big Brother Dog wasn't there. Nara shinobi and kunoichi were often the ones that broke up the angry mobs or at least froze them until she could escape. Thus, there was no way in hell she was going to mooch off of them any more than she already did._

 _"_ _It's nothing, really!" She tried to explain, faking a smile. "Someone broke into my apartment is all. I just have to clean it up! No need to-"_

 _"_ _They completely ransacked it." Shikamaru cut her off, the iciness in his tone telling his parents just how serious he was. "It isn't safe. She's staying here."_

 _And that is how the guest room next to Shikamaru's room became her bedroom. Shikaku had gone to check the apartment, took one look, and stormed the Hokage's office. Gramps immediately agreed to her new living arrangements, which pissed the civilian council off to no end (you know you're doing something right when you're pissing off the civilian council)._

 _How does this tie into the first time she participated in the traditional early morning training? Well, it was hard to sleep when Yoshino decides to throw her giant shuriken at Shikaku during their spar. He dodged, but sadly, her window couldn't._

 _"_ _Ep!" She screeched as glass shattered and the shuriken got imbedded into the back of the door. Well, that's one way to wake up. At 4:00 in the morning. The family swarmed her in a matter of seconds._

 _"_ _Ah, Naruto! Are you ok? Did the glass hit you? Let me see!" Yoshino panicked as she inspected Naruto, making the girl feel like a ragdoll with all of the matriarch's pulling. The male Naras were doing what they did best; muttering troublesome under their breath._

 _"_ _Look at what you did, Shikaku! We lost another window!" Yoshino scolded, turning to wag her finger at her husband._

 _"_ _What did you want me to do? Get hit?" Shikaku muttered, which Yoshino heard, naturally. She got that really scary glow around her again and her frying pan was in her hand._

 _"_ _I mean, yes, dear, I'm sorry." He stuttered through quickly, trying to appease his wife._

 _"_ _Whipped." Shikamaru coughed, earning him a smack on the head from his dad._

 _"_ _Um, why are you guys up at 4:00 in the morning?" Naruto asked, causing the family of three to blink, remembering that she was there too._

 _"_ _Um, are we allowed to tell her?" Shikamaru asked, looking up at his dad._

 _"_ _Well-"_

 _"_ _Shikaku, I have an idea!" Yoshino exclaimed before leaning up to whisper into his ear. The kids shared a confused look before they continued to watch the parents' hushed conversation. Shikaku nodded a few times. He mouthed 'Really?' glancing back at the kids before listening to his wife's whisper. When Yoshino eventually stopped, he spoke for the kids to hear,_

 _"_ _I'll handle it in a few hours. Well, Naruto, you are one of the few non-Naras to know this so you can't actually tell anyone. We," he waved to his family, "were training."_

 _"…_ _You three were training?"_

 _"_ _Yes."_

 _"_ _At 4:00 in the morning?"_

 _"_ _We started at 3:30, actually."_

 _"_ _Even him?" She questioned, pointing to her lazy friend. "Mr. I'm Going to Sleep Through Practice Spars and Kunai Throwing?" The parents snorted in laughter._

 _"_ _Why do you think I sleep through school?" Shikamaru stated. "I've already learned all that stuff and daily training at 3:30 every morning is exhausting. Iruka-Sensei's droning on and on about chakra theory is the perfect time for a nap."_

 _Ok then…_

 _"_ _But why so early?" Naruto asked._

 _"_ _Believe me, I asked the same question." Yoshino stated, giving her a weird wink, like she knew something that Naruto didn't._

 _"_ _Our clan specializes in a jutsu that manipulates shadows and darkness. What better time to do that than when the shadows are most prominent?" Shikaku explained and while Naruto didn't understand all of the words that he used, her vocabular still sucked, but she got the main point._

 _"_ _And you're going to join us!" Yoshino chirped cheerfully, causing the kids to blink at her._

 _"_ _Eh?!" They asked._

 _"_ _But I thought the stupid council said that you guys couldn't help her with her training?" Shikamaru remembered. That whole shit show had happened when she was ten, but that was for later._

 _"_ _Correct, we, the adults, can't directly help her. But if Naruto just so happened to be there for our early morning training and we're fixing your mistakes, well, can they really blame us for Naruto being bright? Besides, you can help her all you want." Shikaku explained with a wicked smirk. His son mirrored him perfectly before turning to her._

 _"_ _Get dressed, we've got work to do. Starting with your taijutsu."_

 _"_ _Hey, it's not that bad."_

 _"_ _You look like a drunk brawler. Come on, we're going to fix it. Troublesome Girl."_

 _"_ _Lazy Boy!"_

"You're distracted again." Shikamaru commented as the edge of his trench knife grazed her cheek. She jumped away, wiping the blood away, revealing a perfectly healed cheek.

"Sorry, lost in memories." She stated, as she high-jumped, her leg extended for a drop-kick. He blocked her this time, but the ground still cratered beneath them. They broke apart, before the timer rang out. Shikamaru sighed with relief before collapsing against the bench, glopping down some water. He passed it to her before asking,

"What were they about?"

"The morning I first started training with you guys."

"Ah, good times. I could actually beat you in a spar back then."

"Don't sell yourself short. You're still way smarter than me."

"Well, someone has to be the smart one."

"Hey!"

"Kidding, troublesome woman." Shikamaru said before groaning, "Why do I have a feeling that the kids are fine but have done something to mess up life as we all know it?"

"Because they have? Sorry, we'll blame it on my side this time. What does that make?"

"Nara: 285 to Uzumaki: 94 but the Uzumaki side is doubled because it's your family and none of you do anything half-assed."

"Damn right we don't." She commented before saying, "We should get ready, everyone's going to be here soon and I still need to decide if I should wear the cape."

"Wear it, it shows your status and intimidates people if we have to fight."

"You're right, good call. Let's go."

 **Author's Note - Well, was that a dozy of a chapter? And to think, I was going to add more to it. Eh, you guys will live. So, what do you guys think is wrong with Shikamaru and Temari? Side note, sorry to all of you guys who are rooting for Canon Naruto and Shikamaru to get together but that ain't happening. The Canon relationship will stand in Canon Universe. Also, here she is, Naruto 2.0! For not giving you guys too much background knowledge, I've clearly showed the difference between the two universe. And before people start bitching at me for saying that Naruto and Shikamaru 2.0 are too young to be married during the war, if they can kill at the age of twelve, they can get married. Besides, before going to WWII, a lot of young people got married before the husbands went off to fight. It's the same thing here, except both spouses are in the war. Also, this is a story, its not to be taken seriously. Well, what do you guys think? Review, favorite and follow. Love you guys! See you guys soon!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	8. Mira Gets a Proposal?

**Author's Note - Hey guys! So, last chapter really got me writing and I finished this beauty! I think you guys are going to like it! Heads up, I reference the Japanese alphabet in this chapter so when you get there and if you have trouble, replace syllabary with letters and the number 46 with 24. You'll get, though, because you guys are awesome! Also, we get more fighting, the siblings reveal a few secrets and alien invaders, oh my! Note, this chapter was influenced by Naruto, the Last Movie. Most of you have probably seen it but if you need help, Youtube is your best friend! Well, that's it! On to the story!**

Chapter 8: Mira Gets a Proposal?

 _Mira_

"What are you trying to do? Draw someone to death? Come on, Inojin, take this seriously!" Mira ordered as she exploded another one of his ink beasts with her kunais, before catching him with her shadow. Man, these kids were painfully slow. And Inojin's rainbow ink was making his attacks really unintimidating. She fell into a spilt as Chocho's expanded fist swept over were her head used to be.

"Ow, fuck!" And clearly, this Inojin wasn't as flexible as the one in her world; something she may or may not have contributed to. Not that she was sorry. He called her Bitch, she called him Bastard, and they would spar out their hatred/dislike/fondness for each other. It was kind of their thing. Shit, this place was really messing with her if she missed _Inojin_ of all people.

"Dai, Inojin said a bad word." Motoko said from where her and Dai sat on the sidelines. Dai pulled an unknowingly Taka move by volunteering to watch over Motoko. Lazy asses, the both of them. Maybe Grandma Yoshino was right; Nara men are born to be one thing, lazy! Dai had just nodded along in a lazy daze, watching the clouds pass above them.

Releasing the jutsu temporally, she swung herself out of the spilt into a triple back flip. Focusing chakra to the soles of her feet, she quickly sprinted up the trees to gain some coverage. Normally, she would use her Nara jutsu to trap whoever was following, then throw some of her fancy elemental ninjutsu at them. Sadly, she was restricted to only her clan jutsus, which sucked. How can she be Konoha's budding Element Mistress without her elemental jutsus?! Oh well, she can improvise.

Mira flipped out of the tree as Inojin and Chocho raced up the tree she had just left. Immediately, her hands were in position as she landed on the ground. Her shadow extended and snagged them both. The pair screamed as they were slammed together, her shadows tying them together with a bow. And because her shadows had a sense of humor, they were left hanging from the highest branch.

"Nice look, guys!" Dai laughed.

"Shut up, Shikadai! Get us out of here!" Chocho screeched.

"Ow! Watch where you're squirming, fat-ass!" Inojin ordered. Chocho starting swinging the pair until Inojin was slammed back against the tree. Ha Ha! That was one of the reason she and Chocho got along so well. They shared a sick joy about causing Inojin pain. Poor boy. Oh well!

"Alright, down you go." Mira said as her shadows lowered them to the ground and receded back into her. But not before she got pictures. She needed new blackmail.

"You're pretty creative with your shadows." Dai commented as he carried Motoko over to them.

"Wish I could take credit for it." Mira laughed. "Taka came up with most of them. He thinks that I can do just about anything with my shadows." Slowly, their group started moving to visit Boruto and company, who had messaged them saying that they were at Training Ground 7.

"He's right. Quick question. How long can you hold your shadow for? You don't even look tried!" Chocho asked, poking her to get her attention.

"Um, let's just say I'm the best in the clan and leave it at that." Mira said. The last thing they need to know was how she broke the sixteen generations long record for how long can a Nara hold their shadow. At the age of 7. Dad had looked at Mom and said troublesome and 'Only your daughter could do this. Stop breaking the impossible, Naruto! We're running out of things to throw at you!' To which Mom replied, 'But that's my thing, Shikamaru!' Anyway, the Ino-Shika-Cho trio, plus two Nara girls, arrived to a scene that Mira can only describe as pure Uzumaki chaos.

"No!" Beni screeched, whacking a ruler against Boruto's knuckles. "You have to write neater! That looks more like an 8 instead of a 4!"

"Sir, you have to control the chains. They won't strangle you if you show them that you are in charge." Taka sweat-dropped, unraveling Guy Mom from his own, tangled up Chakra Chains. Oh no, what have they done?

Oh, and they weren't the only ones watching the spectacle. Everyone who was at dinner last night was there. Even Temari, who was glaring at Motoko again. Tch, fine by that way. Have a vendetta against a child. Real mature. Mira found herself turning to Aunt Hinata. Which was still fucked up that Aunt Hinata was married to Guy Mom, in her humble opinion. Still, Mira turned to the older woman.

"What is this?" Mira asked.

"Apparently, Takashi and Benihime are giving a lesson. I believe they called it 'How to be an Uzumaki 101.' They've been at it since 5 this morning." Aunt Hinata explained as an explosion erupted from Boruto's scroll. Boruto was covered in soot.

"Cough, cough, you idiot! That's supposed to be the kanji for water!" Beni yelled, hitting Boruto again with her ruler. Maybe Beni has been spending too much time with their grandmothers again…

"Hima! We need a new scroll and ink, stat! Code black! Code black!" Beni cried. Himawari saluted and marched up to Uncle Sai. She held out her hand and released it…

The Puppy Dog Eyes no Jutsu. With added cuteness points for having the Hyuga's eyes. Hima had the scroll and ink back to Beni before you could blink.

"Again! And don't waste the ink this time! Hima, he needs penmanship lesson."

"Clearly, it's awful! I'll hire a tutor, Grandpa still owes me a favor." Hima agreed.

"Guys, still here."

"Keep writing!" The girls ordered, each giving off their own evil glow. Only three days and they were best friends. Man, Beni worked quickly.

"What are you guys doing here?" Dai asked, the question pointed at the spectator group.

"We wanted to see how all of this was going to turn out." Uncle Choji said, munching on some potato chips. "Naruto told us that the kids were going to teach him a few things last night at dinner."

"Honestly, best show ever." Uncle Kiba snickered. "Glad I ran into you guys on my back from that mission. So, you're the Nara girl?" Akamaru barked happily beside him.

"Yes sir, Mira Nara, pleased to meet you." Mira introduced herself before pointing at Motoko, who had once again found Not Dad. "That's my little sister, Motoko. You'll have to excuse her, she's shy and sleepy." Uncle Kiba laughed before giving her some room so that she could sit between him and Aunt Hinata. Man, it was weird seeing them not married. Kenji will never believe her when she tells him that his dad was married to a _cat lady_ in this dimension. He might actually die from a heart-attack. Note to self, remember to bring the camera to training.

"In coming!" Someone shouted as the group dunked, a plethora of chains flew over their heads.

"What a- I mean, trouble- I mean, Mira, you're here!" Wow, real smooth, Taka. "Lord Hokage sucks at chakra control." Huh, granted Mom's chakra control wasn't great but she was still pretty decent at it.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Fix it?" Mira rolled her eyes at his pitiful plea.

"Nope, you got yourself into this, you deal with it."

"I didn't even agree to this, Beni did!" Taka protested before dodging another rogue chain. "What the hell is with your chains and coming to life?!"

"If it helps, my clones used to do this too." Guy Mom said bashfully, scratching the back of his head. Taka looked at him in disbelief.

"Why didn't you say anything two hours ago?" Taka complained, before he called out to her. "Mira, what do _The Notes_ say about dealing with out of control clones?"

"'If you are facing a few rogue clones, there are a few ways you can deal with it. The most obvious one is killing them right way and never using Shadow Clone Jutsu ever again. Clearly, you aren't ready for it. Personally, I recommend my method of actually letting them run wild for a bit in a controlled space before beating them into submission. Trust me, it works like a charm and they'll start calling you boss.' _The Notes_ , chapter 2, page 73, paragraph 5."

There was silence as everyone stared at her in disbelief. Mira shrugged.

"What? I have a photographic memory. I remember a lot of things." Mira stated.

"Yeah, a little bit about everything and a whole lot about nothing." Taka snickered before leaping out of the way of her senbon. Oops, her hand slipped. Sorry Taka… Not!

"I can't believe Naruto's actually learning some about his clan." Sakura Uchiha commented to Uncle Kakashi, causing him to nod. Mira couldn't believe that Sakura was actually Sarada's birthmother in the dimension. Man, Mom's going to flip a shit when she finds out and it's not going to be pretty. (The reason for that is a _really_ long and complicated tale that was too troublesome to explain at this moment.)

"I can't believe Dickless has a brain to learn with." Uncle Sai commented, causing his wife to slap him on the back of the head.

"Alright, that's 47 chains you got under control, 258 to go." Taka counted in defeated, wondering why oh why was he always volunteered to do stuff.

47… 47… Page 47!

"TAKA! STOP TEACHING!"

Now, if they were back at home, her yelling at her twin is quite common. Actually, there was always a lot of noise at their house. Someone fighting over the bathroom, people arguing over whose turn it was to feed the fawns, random shinobi popping in and out of the house, etc. But since she was trying to act more Nara while here, she's been oddly quieter. It actually felt good to yell again. The people here though, looked at her as if she had just been taken over by a ghost. Well, more like her brain took over and it was running a mile a minute. Ignoring all of the looks, she raced over to Taka and started shaking him like a rag doll.

"Taka, you're a genius!"

"How?! Stop shaking me, woman!"

"Numbers, Taka! Numbers! Page 47! Your seals diary! I remember the code! I need something to write on!" Mira exclaimed. Her twin's eyes widen before he ripped the scroll and ink that Boruto was using away from him.

"Hey!"

"Sorry, dude. Everyone, you are about to witness the genius and insanity that is Mira Nara." Taka teased, but she hardly cared. She barely noticed how everyone circled her as she knelt in the grass, furiously writing number after number. Soon, the entire page was filled with evenly spaced rows of numbers.

"New scroll!" She ordered and was immediately handed one by Uncle Sai. She started to decode her own message. One of the done sides to her memory is that she has to do everything the way she remembers it. Which means, no, she just can't remember the message, no, she had to write down the code first, then solve the damn thing. Troublesome…

"Amazing, that coding method was used back in the First Shinobi War." Not Dad muttered under his breath.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Aunt Ino asked.

"Notice the difference in how her stroke pressure when she wrote out the numbers. Now notice how the numbers only go up to 46. It's a traditional code, the numbers represent a syllabary from our alphabet. However, matched every number to syllabary, you wouldn't get the message. Her brush strokes are the key. The numbers that she needs are the ones that she used a lighter stroke when she wrote it. Thus, you need a fine eye to detect the difference in the strokes. Old fashioned but since every few people even know about, it's a perfectly good method to use in order to protect something important." Not Dad explained for her. There, she finished it. Under two minutes, a new record!

"Shadows, they bridge the worlds together. Taka, I activated the seal." Mira said in shock.

Before anyone could comment, all of the adults, plus Akamaru, were thrown away from the kids. They were dog-piled off to the side and a huge, yellow cube formed around them. Oh no, that can't be good...

"I'm sorry, but I can't let you four leave just yet." A voice called from above the kids. _Fuck, these guys again! Why can't they just go away?!_ Above them was an Otsutsuki, one of those alien-hybrid shinobi things that were a real pain in the ass to deal with. And an army of shinobi puppets. _Great, what a drag…_

"Toneri!" Guy Mom shouted from the barrier. "Let us out of here so that I can kick your ass again!" The adults were all standing, their faces pressed against the walls as they all glared up at the floating alien. So, this world has to deal with piece of shit aliens too… God dammit…

"Tempting but no. Good luck trying to get out of that barrier though. One of my dear grandmother's creations, you know. Only I can bring that barrier down." Toneri bragged.

"Is this the asshole who tried to marry Aunt Hinata then proposed to Mom mid-battle?" Taka asked as he helped her up.

"I think so." Mira stated as the genin all stood-up to face Toneri. At his side was a much of his puppet shinobi.

"What the hell do you want? Dad already kicked your ass and Mom already rejected you!" Boruto stated, causing Toneri to laugh.

"Oh, believe me, young Boruto, I remember that very clearly. However." The alien's eyes shifted until they landed… on Mira. _Fucking Hell!_ "She will be my new bride."

Mira wasn't sure who growled louder, Taka, Shikadai, or Not Dad. She shifted into her taijutsu stance. Raising her eyes to meet Toneri, she glared at him.

"Yeah, no! Piss off, Pervert!" What was with her and fighting people who wanted to date/marry her? It happens all the fucking time and she only 13!

"Feisty!" Toneri laughed. "I like that. But it's not like you have a choice. Get her."

With that, the shinobi puppets rushed forward to swarm them.

 _Kakashi_

"Benihime, Class Orange Shinobi! Your mission is to protect Himawari and Motoko! Activate protection shield when safe!" Mira ordered firmly, before her hands signed very quickly for a genin. "Black Spider Lily!"

Her shadow shot out, ensnaring nearly all of the puppets in an almost spider web-like fashion. One of Shikaku's old techniques, Kakashi noted. The puppets she missed were being pushed towards her by a fast Takashi, who was like a dirty blonde comet in the sky. He kicked and punched the puppets to the ground, where Mira trapped them. The other genin started to do the same. The genin, plus two academy students and a girl who was practically still a baby, were facing off against an Otsutsuki all by themselves. And the adults could do nothing because this barrier was repressing all of their chakra. Yes, even Kurama was repressed. They could do absolutely nothing. No jutsus, no Kekkei Genkai, nothing!

"What the hell do you mean your rinnegan isn't working?" Well, Shikamaru was pissed off.

"I can't get us through, it isn't working. It's like this thing is repressing our powers."

"Byukagan!" Hinata shouted, activated her eyes, only shield them and hiss. "He's right! This thing isn't letting us use our Kekkei Genkai! No, Himawari!" The mother's scream of fear alerted everyone to the youngest Uzumaki's peril as Himawari stood before them protecting Motoko, her own Byukagan activated as a puppet tried to stab through her.

Whoosh! Slice!

"Stay away from my sisters, you big meanie!"

Kakashi blinked in absolute shock with a hint of horror at the scene he just witnessed. Benihime had just rushed forward in lightning fast speed and sliced the puppet in half. But it was the weapon that she used that made him and the original Team 7 drop their jaws in absolute shock.

"Is that Kubikiribocho?" Sakura asked, not believing her eyes as they watched Beni swing Zabuza's blade with practiced easy. A redhead seven-year-old, swinging a blade that was taller than her as if it was as light as a feather. Where the hell did she even get that thing?! And the girl had complete control of the blade, slicing puppets with expert ease as Hima called out their positions, Motoko now latched on Hima's back. Together, the two Uzumaki girls battled their way to the yellow cube and put their backs the adults. Beni stabbed the ground, the blade shielding girls before Beni put her hands that the flat side of the blade.

"Fuinjutsu: Protective Claymore Shield!" From her hands, blue chakra lines swirled, etching themselves into the blade before a chakra barrier formed around the girls. The barrier formed another cube, just big enough to completely shield the girls. One of the puppets tried to break through into, only to combust on contact.

"Motoko, take over the seal! Hima, time to put those lessons to work! Don't worry, everyone! I'll get you guys out!" Beni promised.

With the most serious expression Kakashi's ever seen on a four-year-old, and that's saying something, Motoko took helm of the seal on the sword, stabilizing the chakra barrier. Beni turned to face the yellow wall that separated the two barriers and placed her hand on it. Immediately, chakra lines and seals appeared before her and she groaned.

"Ah man, whoever made this was good." Then the girl yelled at the top of her lungs.

"MIRA, TAKA, I NEED AT LEAST TEN MINUTES!"

"Roger that! Mira, do it!" Taka ordered as the genin jumped away from the shadow bound puppets.

"Shadow Decapitation!" Mira said. Her shadows crawled up the puppets. Slice, slice, slice. Thump, thump, thump. All of the puppets fell, all headless. Toneri laughed and clapped.

"Oh yes, you are perfect!" He purred, looking at Mira as if she was a treasure trove. "A girl fertile with Yin and blessed with endless chakra and longevity. Yes, you will bring back the great glory of Otsutsuki Clan when you bear our children." _What the hell does that even mean, fertile with Yin?_

"I'd sooner die!" Mira hissed. "No Nara woman has ever been told what to do from someone she doesn't respect and I will be damned if I am the first!"

"That can be arranged. Marry me, Shikamira Nara or die with your friends. The choice is up to you." Toneri said. Then in a second, he was before the girl, his hand caressing her face. Mira froze, stunned by the fact that he knew her first name.

… Shikamira… her real name was-

Gasps exploded from the adults in the cube, all of their eyes locking onto Shikamaru. His gloved fists banged against the barrier, his shoulders shaking with fury and worry. Shikamira, though clearly, she went by her nickname, wasn't just a powerful Nara. No, she was the heiress, the first born, the future Lady Nara.

"How did he know that?" Beni grumbled as her and Hima continued to mess with the barrier. Motoko shrugged, giving the hybrid a death-glare that would scare any man.

"ROARING RIPTIDE!"

"Umph! Gaah!" Toneri shouted in pain as Taka's quick, chakra infused kick sent him flying back into the forest. Enraged, Taka followed and launched himself at the alien, throwing punches left and right.

"Keep! Your! Hands! Off! Of! My! Sister!" Taka roared with each punch.

…Sister, did Taka just call Mira his-

"Sister, holy shit-"

"How did we miss that?"

"No way-"

"Told you he was hiding something."

"Bastard, I don't have the patience to deal with your assholeness right now!"

"Then that means…" It was Shikamaru who whispered that line out and it finally clicked to Kakashi part of the image that he couldn't see cleared. These four time-travelers were siblings! That's why they were so close! Why Mira knew the Uzumaki taijutsu style! Why the girls were distraught when they were questioning Taka last night!

"Benihime, what your brother just said?" Naruto asked, causing Beni and Motoko to give them a guilty smile.

"Oops! Surprise! Well, Mira and Taka are twins. Mira's the oldest. Then Taka, then me, then Motoko!"

"But you said you were Uzumakis!" Choji stated.

"Yep, because we are! I'm Benihime Nara Uzumaki, but you can still call me Beni!" Beni exclaimed. To Kakashi's surprise, Hima commented,

"I'm surprised you guys didn't find out sooner!" They gave her a surprised look. "What?! I noticed that Taka and Shikadai acted and looked the same! So, I asked Beni!" They turned to the redette, who shrugged.

"What? You didn't ask." Before anyone could question the girls further, Taka was throw back against their cube as the wind picked up. A mini tornado formed in the middle of the forest, causing the genin to take cover.

"Fuck, that hurt!" Taka complained as he unpeeled himself from the barrier. "How much longer, Beni?! He brought a friend!" Taka's bangs whipped out of his face, revealing his pissed off expression. In that moment, Kakashi could see just how identical he looked to Shikadai and Mira.

"Um, ten minutes?!"

"That's what you said last time!"

"Oh, you spilled the beans again, Taka." Ripping his blue eyes away from the growing tornado, Taka turned to have the adults. There was no denying it now. You could just see how Nara he was, especially when he slouched and said,

"What a drag…"

"I'm going to enjoy killing you all but first, I would like to introduce you to my little friend." Toneri laughed from above as he watched the fight below him. He was playing with them, Kakashi realized. He wanted to play with his food before he killed it.

"TAKA, GET YOURSELF BACK HERE AND HELP US, YOU DUMBASS!" Mira shouted through the windy forest.

"GIVE ME A MINUTE!"

"WE DON'T HAVE A MINUTE!"

"Aw, fuck it! We'll explain later, after we finish kicking ass." Taka promised and was off, running at a speed that would make Guy proud. Then Taka shouted,

"The First Gate: The Gate of Opening! Open! The Second Gate: The Gate of Healing! Open! The Third Gate: The Gate of Life! Open! The Fourth Gate: The Gate of Pain: Open!" Immediately, the green glow shrouded over Taka as he launched himself into the heart of the tornado. He disappeared into the cloudy windy but they could clearly hear him.

"CRASHING HURRICANE!"

A tremendous roar of pain escaped the tornado as the wind vanished. A gigantic wooden monster stood in the middle of the forest. It looked a lot like the One-tail but with wooden armor. Taka had gotten the beast in the middle of the chest. It fell back in pain, an enormous crack where its heart should be.

"Lee, catch him!" Chocho screeched as Taka fell from the sky, the green light vanishing. Metal Lee snatched him out of the air, carrying the boy over to the rest of genin.

"You idiot, I said help us! Not try to kill yourself!" Mira yelled as she pulled her twin off of Lee.

"Stop nagging, you troublesome woman." Taka groaned.

"I'll show you troublesome!" Mira snapped back, before she ramaged through his pouch. She pulled out a seal and slapped it on him. Taka activated it and the burns and cleans that he had received vanished, his fatigue leaving him. _Did Taka have healing seals on him?_

"Guys, Big, Bad, and Ugly is still standing!" Boruto shouted as the creature rose to its feet.

"Yes, Hozukimaru is impossible to defeat now that I've blocked off your precious Hokage. Get them." Toneri ordered and the wood beast charged at the kids. The kids scattered.

"We need a plan!" Sarada shouted. "There has to be some way to take this thing down!"

"Fire Style: Phoenix Flower Jutsu!" Everyone turned as Mira released the gigantic burst of fire onto the creature. It roared in pain before trying to bat her way. As it did, Kakashi noticed how the injuries it just received were already healed. But where Taka hit it-

"Guys, we've got to hit it where the crack is!" Shikadai shouted before dodging as the monster trampled the tree he was in.

"Benihime, how much longer?" Shikamaru asked, his eyes never leaving the fight. The Konoha 12 had never felt more useless in their entire lives. Here they were, trapped in a barrier that made them as weak as civilians.

"Three more minutes!"

"How? The damn thing won't stop moving!" Boruto noted before one of Mitsuki's snake arms dragged him out of falling tree branches. The kids were running out of energy and time.

"We've got to trap it! Dai, Taka, pin it down!" Mira ordered. The genin and the adults looked at her in confusion. Why was Mira ordering someone else to pin it when she was so good with her shadows? But Taka did as he was told.

Slamming both palms into the dirt, the boy halted his run, his back to the yellow cube. Kakashi watched as his back as black chakra lines appeared on his back. Pitch black chains appeared from Taka's shadow, racing at the monster. The chains wrapped itself around the beast's limbs.

"Shadow Chaining Jutsu Complete!" If there was any doubt of Taka not being a Nara, that attack made those doubts disappear. Unfortunately, the thing could still move. Then more shadows appeared, stabbing into the beast.

"Shadow Stitching Jutsu Complete!" Shikadai yelled, joining in on the action. Sarada shared a nod with Chocho and Metal as they all jumped around the beast, forming a triangle around the creature.

"Partial Expansion Jutsu!" Chocho yelled, her fist growing in size.

"The First Gate: The Gate of Open! Open!" Metal shouted, building up power.

"Shannaro!" Sarada shouted and the trio punched the ground before them. The ground below the monster caved in, stopping most of its movements. Then a gigantic ink octopus latched itself onto the monster back as Mitsuki's snakes helped the ink octopus to pull the beast so that its chest was wide open.

"Form the Rasengan and I'll follow!" Mira ordered as her chakra and shadows started to circle around her.

"How do you know I can do that?!"

"Just do it!"

"Right, RASENGAN!" Boruto throw his rasengan, it turning invisible as it flew. It made contact, making the crack in the monster become a spiral. The monster roared in pain, deafening all that was around it.

"Alright, everyone, watch out!" Mira shouted as her dark red top was reduced to shreds back of the lightning erupting her back. Thankfully, she was wearing a pitch-black halter top underneath it. Through the lightning chakra, Kakashi could see what looked like a black seal on the small of her back. The seal shined and the lightning turned as black as her shadows.

Mira jumped, running up her brother's shadow chains, leaving a trail of black lightning in her wake. As she ran, her palms formed what looked lightning balls. She jumped off of the chain, freefalling and bring the two orbs together. The two orbs combined, creating what can only be describe as a black rasen shuriken. Turns out, Kakashi's description wasn't that far off target.

"Yin Veiled Rasen Shuriken!" Mira shouted as she released her jutsu. It slammed into the wound. At contact, the sound barrier broke as black lightning charged across the creature. The monster screamed as it was crack widen opened, its insides being burned alive until it died, incinerating completely into a large, ash pile. They did it!

"Done!" And the barrier fell. Immediately, Kakashi felt his chakra return him as the parents ran to their respective children, standing in front of the protectively. Immediately, Naruto went into Kurama mode as he and Sasuke jumped into the air, ready to face the smiling alien. Wait minute, why the hell was he still smiling? Unless-

Naruto and Sasuke slammed into a wall, another yellow barrier was formed around all of them again. The two immediately lost their chakra again, crashing into the ground hard.

"Seriously! I just fixed this!" Beni complained as Toneri laughed, the evil laced in his voice.

"Mira!" Taka shouted. Kakashi turned and his eyes widen. Mira was left purposefully outside of the barrier, singling her out. She struggled to get to her feet, flinching as bouts of black lightning danced across her skin.

"You know, I'll make a deal with you, Shikamira. Marry me and I'll spare your friends and family. Refuse, and I kill you all, starting with you." Toneri said, smirking as he watched the heiress limp, using the barrier as a support. She kept her head down, her dark brown hair shielding her from the gazes.

"Don't do it, Mira!" Taka yelled, tried to punch through the barrier, blooding his knuckles. "We aren't worth it, you troublesome girl! Mira! Mira!"

Other pleas joined in, from Shikamaru, Shikadai, Beni, Hima, Boruto, Sarada, Motoko, hell, even he was pleading with the girl. But she ignored them all, until she stood between them and Toneri. The alien lowered himself so that he was on the ground, staring directly at her bowed form.

"So, Shikamira, what will it be?"

The wind blew, a leaf dancing in between them. Then Mira snapped her head up and flicked both of her wrists. Instantly, she gripped two shadow katanas, one flaming, the other crackling with lightning.

"I'm Shikamira Nara Uzumaki of Konoha. I am a Chunin, the eldest child of the Lady Hokage and her Jonin Commander. I will be the Lady Nara. And if you think, I'm going to let you hurt any of these people, you're dead wrong! You want to marry me, you're going to have to beat me first!" Mira stated, bring the two blades so that one was straight up at a 90-degree angle while the other met it, forming a perpendicular cross between the blades.

"Pity, we have to do this the hard way. So be it." Toneri said and rushed towards the injured girl.

"Mira!" Everyone shouted, but the girl didn't move, she didn't dodge. She stood firm, blades raised, glaring down the alien with all she had. He was getting closer when-

CRASH! CLAP! BOOM!

Immediately Toneri flew backwards with the hundreds of uprooted trees that were being blown away. A dust cloud formed before Mira and the barrier but Kakashi could tell that whatever had done that tremendous gale force winds formed an equally as large of a crater into the ground.

"Shikamira, we give you guys one day off and you end up dimension hopping and fighting alien shinobi. What am I going to do with you?" A feminine voiced teased, her soft alto-soprano piercing through the dust.

"No way…" Mira spoke with shock, nearly dropping her blades.

"It that…" Taka said, equally as shocked as his twin.

"Mommy!" Beni and Motoko cheered, pressing their faces against barrier so that they could see the woman's form as the dust vanished. In the carter was average height woman and that is where the average ended. Because Kakashi has since that body and cape before.

"Holy shit!"

"What the?"

"Impossible!"

"Dickless, appears that you are actually dickless!"

But Naruto was too in shock to respond as he stared at the woman with his cape, who had jumped out of her crater to face her daughter, and as a result, the group. The woman was skinny, with toned muscles and voluptuous curves (but not too voluptuous, more of an Kurenai than a Tsunade). Her skin was kissed by the sun and flawless. Her eyes were like sapphires, shining with energy and power. Her beauty was breathtaking, completely a natural beauty. She wore a navy blue kunoichi dress, with high slights on both legs. So high that she wore jet black leggings underneath it to keep her dignity. The bodice of the dress was high necked but sleeveless, her cape extending from the collar at the back of her slim neck. Orange details lined the edges and inside of the dress, giving the woman some color without the kill-me orange target-look. The dress was skin tight against her body, showing off her amazing figure. She wore long, fingers gloves on both arms and high-kneed shinobi boots.

The woman before him look so much like Naruto's Sexy Jutsu form that it was ridiculous. But this woman, looked more realistic. Her hips were wider than the jutsu's, she actually had muscles, her breasts weren't ridicously huge and her blonde locks were elegantly tied back into a fishtail braid instead of those cheesy pigtails. In all honesty, it was the whisker marks on her cheeks that confirmed to Kakashi what he was seeing.

"Mom?" Mira whispered as her mother roved her eyes over her daughter's body, scanning her for injuries. The blonde woman gave her daughter a baby smile before pushing gently on her shoulders. Mira sat, her back against the barrier before another barrier formed around her.

"Stay there, your father is on his way." The woman whispered before she scanned the group in the box. "Benihime, Takashi don't mess with the barrier until I'm done."

"Yes, Mommy!" Beni saluted as Takashi just nodded disbelief as the woman turned away from the stunned group. As she turned, the wind blew her cape, revealing the white outline of the Nara clan-mark. Toneri was standing 100 yards away from her. He was bleeding, glare at the beautiful woman.

"Who the hell are you?" The alien demanded. The woman widen her stance, crouching slightly before smirking,

"Who am I? The name's Naruto Uzumaki Nara, 7th Hokage of Konoha. Today's your lucky day, Toneri. You've made it to the top of my shit list." The Lady Hokage punched her fist into her palm. She didn't have a fake hand. "Get ready for an ass whooping!"

 **Author's Note - Oh, shit just got real! Well, guys, do you like Naruto 2.0's dynamic entry?! (God, Lee and Guy were some of the best characters in the anime for that alone) Did you guys like how I made Hima the one to know?! Didn't see that coming, right?! Next chapter will be kinda like this, hilarity and action mixed into one! Also, guys, if you have art that is really and you want me to make that the cover, you got to send me a link. And I reserve all the rights to not use it! (I'm picky, sue me.) Well, please review, favorite and fellow. I love you guys so much! See you guys soon!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	9. Will You Stop Flirting!

**Author's Note - Guys, we've done it! 50 followers! I love you guys! For that, you guys get this dozy of a chapter. Please, guys, let me know if it get too confusing! Meshing Canon with 2.0 is difficult! A lot of 'Whats' and questions. And Naruto has a lot of characters... Oh well. So, Canon Shikamaru is going to start us off. And Canon is about to see the flirting and insanity of 2.0 Naruto and Shikamaru! On to the story!**

Chapter 9: Will You Stop Flirting!

 _Advisor Nara_

"Who am I? The name's Naruto Uzumaki Nara, 7th Hokage of Konoha. Today's your lucky day, Toneri. You've made it to the top of my shit list. Get ready for an ass whooping!"

This can't be happening, this can't be happening, this can't be happening! Shikamaru could barely breath before the arrival of the woman. The sight of his son battling a bamboo monster along with Shikamira-

Shikamira, she was the heiress. Only the heir, the future leader of the Nara clan had a Shika in their name. The sitting girl before him would be the first Lady Nara since the creation of the clan to lead the clan. His wide eyes shifted from the girl to the woman who claimed to be her mother and he was hyperventilating.

Shikamaru watched completely god smacked as a female version of Naruto vanished until to appear before Toneri, kicking him so hard in the stomach that he went flying into the air. Girl Naruto jumped up, spinning elegantly in the air, her kunoichi dress and cape making her resemble a spinning top. She reached the stunned and pained alien, one leg kicking his stomach again as her elbows slammed into the back of his head.

"Gah!" Toneri spat up blood and tried to break her grip on him when her free hand grabbed the back of his robe. She started her spinning again, swinging the alien around and around until they only looked a strip of blue and black in the sky.

CRASH! BOOM!

Girl Naruto released him, sending him crashing into the earth. He formed a valley as his body dug deeper and deeper into the ground, ruining the forest even more.

"Yay, Mommy! Get him!" Benihime cheered from inside the barrier as she and apparently her little sister, Motoko, watched with excitement. They were probably the only ones in the cube that weren't confused or weirded out of their minds. Hell, Shikamaru has seen a lot of shit happen. This was a first.

It looked wrong, seeing the woman version of Naruto fighting to protect them instead Naruto himself doing it. Who knew Naruto as a girl would actually be this, dare he think this, beautiful? Actually, there had always been this thought amongst the guys that Naruto would have made a pretty girl, seeming how soft a lot of his features had been when they were younger. Clearly, they had been right!

Fuck, she was exactly his type, blonde, curvy and troublesome…

And this woman was powerful. Here she was, quite easily beating the life out of the alien before her with nothing but her taijutsu! And if she was truly Naruto, then Shikamaru would bet his life savings that she had Kurama and Sage mode too but wasn't using it!

"This is so weird but awesome at the same time!" Kiba stated, a wolfish grin on his face as they watched the Lady Hokage start her descent back to the ground.

Team 7, both old and new, were all pale, Naruto being the palest, the horror and embarrassment plastered on his face. Shikamaru couldn't look at his boss and best friend because he felt like the earth should swallowed him whole to save him from the embarrassment. Team 8 just looked in awe at the woman's skills, well, Hinata also looked a little disturbed. Lee was drooling, wither it was over the women's body or her taijutsu skills was unclear.

The kids, well, the kids were trying to get questions out of Takashi, who stayed silent as his mother battled, his eyes narrowed as he inspected the battle. Holy shit, how had he not seen it sooner?! That was the exact face Shikamaru used to make when he was that age! And seeing Takashi, even with his hair different from Shikadai's, standing next to his son made the situation all too real.

Mira mirrored her brother, but her hands still held her katanas, prepared to fight encase the shield collapsed. Shikamaru's gaze shifted over to Choji, Ino and Karui. Karui was watching the fight with a smirk, clearly happy to see a kunoichi kick some ass for once. Choji had opened a bag of chips, munching furiously while he watched. Ino looked dumbfounded but she had this 'OH' face as if everything that's happened these past three days made way more sense.

It was Temari's reaction that made him nervous. His wife's teal eyes shone brightly with dislike. Clearly, she didn't like the fact that Girl Naruto called herself a Nara and the mother of the heiress. Which meant that this woman as the Lady Nara which meant that…

Shikamaru's eyes kept moving, comparing the woman to her kids, to his son, to Naruto, then back at the woman. _No way…_ He could feel himself grew paler with every look, the horror setting in on his face. _These kids aren't time-travelers! They're from a dimension where Naruto's their mother and I'm their-_

Girl Naruto floated down, using what looked like wind chakra to soften her landing. As soon as her feet landed, she reached behind her waist and lowered her stance, pulling out two long, but slim pieces of metal with a sharp tip. They were twice the length of a kunai. Then, Girl Naruto flicked her wrists and Shikamaru heard Temari's sharp intake in breath.

Fans… This Girl Naruto battled with hand fans. And these weren't your ordinary hand fans. No, these were badass. They were completely out of the same metal as kunai, no paper what so ever. They shined in the sun, revealing the engraved kanji of all of the elements.

Girl Naruto's back glowed as chakra lines appeared on her. The fans glowed with her as the lines on the woman's back formed chains. The chains formed at the base of the fans. The chains climbed up each arm, wrapping loosely around them six times before they connected, leaving a large loop that fell onto her back. Then, the chains changed into an icy blue and started to float. The large loop framed an almost completed circle over her blonde hair as the twelve arm wrappings remain levitated an inch above her skin.

"Oh, shit, she's taking this seriously." The trapped group shifted their gaze to Mira.

"Mom tries not to use her fans too often. Says she causes too much property damage when she does." Mira explained.

"Mommy, Mira said a bad word."

"Not now, Motoko, Mommy's busy." Girl Naruto said, her eyes never leaving the valley before her. Rocks exploded up as Toneri crawled his way out. The woman didn't even flinch as boulder flew at her. Taking the right fan, she swung it up. Shikamaru's eyes locked onto the kanji on the fan as it glowed blue. The kanji morphed quickly, reading tiger, then rabbit, dog, ram, and dragon.

"Wind Style: Wind Blade Jutsu!" The large stone was cleaved in half. The two pieces kept flying but passed their cage by inches. Shikamaru could almost feel the envy that roared out of Temari. Trees, Temari could cut down easily. Stones were a different story, especially one that big. And to do it with such a weak wind jutsu on top of it.

"You guys ok?" The woman didn't look back as she asked her question.

"We're good, thanks Mommy!" Beni answered for the stunned stupid group. Then Toneri roared,

"What did you do?!" He tried jumping up but just barely gained air, collapsing onto the ground.

"Anti-gravity seal!" The mother smirked. "Thought it would be fun if we actually obeyed the laws of physics for once!"

The alien roared at her. Fist raised, he ran at her. Half way there, they became flaming fists. Ok, well, she'll block him! Wait, why wasn't she trying to move?! He was getting closer!

Silence.

Toneri froze, his one of his flaming arms centimeters away from landing onto her stomach.

"How?" Toneri asked, unable to move at all. Girl Naruto pointed down, causing everyone to look at the ground. Attached to Toneri's shadow was trench knife that looked eerily like Asuma-Sensei's, locking the alien in place. Then two large shadow hands reached out from Toneri's shadow. The shadow hands had complete control over Toneri as Girl Naruto jumped back to watch the show that was about to unfold. Lifting Toneri at the ankles, the shadows slammed his back into the dirt before doing the same to his front. And it kept going. For two whole minutes.

"Oh, my husband's is as protective as he is lazy!" The woman laughed. "Looks like you made it just in time, Shikamaru! We need to work on your shadow traveling speed, though. You're slacking again."

 _Shika-_

The shadow hands shot Toneri flying back into the forest like a slingshot before they received back into the shadow, grabbing the trench knife with it. The shadow shot over to her side, before a man rose from the shadow.

For a second, Shikamaru swore he was looking at the back of his father. Shikamaru had always looked like Dad's clone but so did the man before. He was just as tall as Shikamaru and was slouching, his hands in his pockets. The man even wore Dad's fur vest over his chunin vest, the same vest swore he kept in the back of his closet. Under those was a dark green fishnet top, which enhanced the man's muscles. They weren't bulging but they were toned and strong. He wore black shinobi pants and sandals. But as the man shifted slightly, Shikamaru saw his own face on the man.

"No way…" It was like he was staring at a mirror. The cries of Kai sounded in the cube, no one believing their eyes and ears.

There was a copy of him outside of the cube. The same jaw, same face, same eyes, same hair, same cigarettes. The only difference was that this Shikamaru had a beard with his goatee, making the man look huskier.

Shikamaru's eyes locked with his counterpart's. The counterpart's eyes widen slightly, shifting over the group before looking back at him. The doppelganger mouthed 'Troublesome' before he smirked and turned to face the woman who called him her husband.

"I'm not slacking." Other Shikamaru drawled, clearly unamused. "You've somehow gotten faster."

"Eh! Really?" Girl Naruto blinked, gaining an almost doe-eyed look. "I'm not even using sage mode or Kurama yet."

"Of course not." He said sarcastically but there was a fond smirk on his face. Holy hell, he was looking at Girl Naruto with such affection that it was almost nauseating. "Tch, Troublesome Wife."

"Lazy Husband." Have mercy, they were flirting with each other!

"Seriously, are you two actually flirting with each other right now?!" Ino shouted at them loudly. Nope, this too much for his genius brain. The couple blinked, looking at the trapped group as if they just noticed them.

"Oh, right, you guys don't know us. What a drag. So, what do I need know?"

"Otsutsuki, real piece of shit. Needs a good ass kicking."

"Details, Naruto. Can this one fly?"

"He could."

"Could?"

"I stopped it."

"How- never mind. Is he taijutsu only?"

"Nope! I just had the need to punch something. You should try it sometime. It's good for the soul!" (She really was Naruto, right down to her endless talking and smiles…)

"Naruto…"

"Oops, got it, stay on task." Girl Naruto pointed her finger back at them. "These guys can't use chakra at the moment, so we have to be careful around his barriers. Oh!" The woman cupped a fist into her palm as a thought struck her. "He doesn't have the byakugan or the tenseigan!"

"But he can see?"

"He must have stolen those eyes from someone." Girl Naruto shrugged.

"Dad, Situation 'A Snowball's Chance in Hell' has happened." Taka called out, causing Other Shikamaru to tense dramatically before turning completely to face Mira, who wave nervously at him. He looked her over through the shield before turning to his wife.

"Please tell me I can actually kill this one." Good, Shikamaru and his counterpart were on the same page.

"Why- Oh!" Girl Naruto glared at the direction where they threw Toneri. "Granted!"

"Excellent, anything else I should know?"

"Daddy! Motoko and I made a friend!" Shikamaru had to stop the flinch the escaped him when Benihime shouted. And the sadness that set it when he noticed the excited and happy look on Motoko's face as nodded in agreement with her sister.

"That's nice, Benihime. Tell me all about it after I've finished gutting this alien."

"Okay!"

"Oh, he's on his way back." Girl Naruto said, cocking her head to the right. "Why didn't I think of using that seal last time? He's way slower than before."

The pair jumped, dodging the typhoon of water that Toneri shot at them. Girl Naruto twirled in the air, her chained fans chiming as she twisted around herself. Slashing both of her hands forward, the woman shouted,

"Water and Fire Style: Burning Tundra Jutsu!" Gale force winds slammed against the water, freezing before the ice started steaming. The dry ice slammed into Toneri, was barely able to move out of the way. He roared, clipped by the burning ice before he tried to gain some distance. He made it a few paces before Other Shikamaru stabbed his trench knives into the ground.

… He had trench knives? He kept Asuma-Sensei's trench knives?!

"Earth Style: Shadow Quick Sand Graveyard!" The shadow shot out of Other Shikamaru, before latching onto Toneri, dragging him into a pile of chakra enhanced quick sand, keeping the alien in place. The duo stood before the struggling alien. Other Shikamaru raised his trench knives, a shadow sharpening them, when-

"I want to ask him some questions." Girl Naruto said. Everyone blinked at her.

"No, no Talk no Jutsu. We agreed that I get to kill him so I'm going to kill him." The doppelganger complained to his wife, his blade just centimeters away from his neck.

"Yeah, but I'm curious as to why he's doing this. Come on, Shikamaru."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

Girl Naruto huffed with a slight pout, crossing her arms, turning away from her husband. She was facing the group again and had a mischievous smile on her face. She winked at them and started mouthing 'three, two, one-'

"Fine." Other Shikamaru groaned as he moved his knives away from the alien's neck. The blonde woman jumped up, quickly pecking him before crouching down in front of their prisoner. He made a choking sound while Naruto looked on with a stupid, confused but horrified look.

"So," Girl Naruto started. "What's your actual name?"

…

"WHAT?" Everyone screamed.

"How the hell did you know that I'm not Toneri?" The Otsutsuki asked.

"Oh, you look a lot like him. But Toneri, for what he's worth, is an honorable guy. Keeps his promises, you know. Besides, your chakra is a different color from his. A more lavender than a royal purple." Girl Naruto explained with a smile. Her husband groaned, smacking his forehead in disbelief.

"Is this really important?"

"Of course, it is. He's just the lackey!" Her husband's surprised expression caused her to cheer. "Yes! That number 489 for the amount of times I knew something before you!"

"Naruto, focus!"

"Right, well, to be frank, you, Mr. No Name, are honestly too weak to be Toneri which means that you're probably from the main branch but you're someone's servant, posing as Toneri. So, what does your boss want?" She asked politely.

"I'm not telling you anything, bitch." The alien spat only Girl Naruto hand to shoot out, choking him. A golden-red glow encased her.

"Listen here, asswipe. In the past three days, I've been nothing but stressed out, hormonal and exhausted because my babies went missing. You are still at the very top of that shit list, especially since you thought that my daughter was up for sale and decided to use my kids as a chew toys. Now, I'm going to ask you again. What does your boss want?!"

"The girl with the Yin and the boy with the unknown Kekkei Genkai!" The alien gasped, only for Girl Naruto's grip to tighten.

"And where is your boss?"

"In the Land of Rice!" He confessed, gasping for air as she let go of his neck.

"There, not so bad right!" She chirped before standing, and turning away from the prisoner.

"You can continue, Jonin Commander." Oh, that's right, his counterpart was the Jonin Commander, not the Advisor…

Thud, whoosh, crackle! The Otsutsuki was dead, ash remained where he had been.

The parents stood before the still trapped group, Mira standing next to them.

"Huh," Girl Naruto said, knocking on the barrier. "Not bad. And it's still standing after that guy died."

"Naruto, how about letting everyone out instead of complementing the enemy's barrier skills?"

"Aw, do I have to? The other you looks like he's going to pass out." And he might actually do that. Fuck, he needed a smoke, badly.

"Naruto-"

"Fine, be a buzz-kill. Let's see here, ah ha! Wow, this is going to be easy! You guys may want to step back!" Everyone jumped back as chakra lines formed a circle before her.

"Here goes!" Girl Naruto said, punching the chakra lines, causing them to glow blue, then a violent red. Crack! The cube shattered, freeing everyone.

"What?! It was that easy?!" Ino complained as the Girl Naruto pulled her twins into a tight hug as Beni and Motoko leaped at their father, causing the man to laugh and twirl the two girls around.

"From the outside, totally. You just have to over power the amount of chakra used to make the original barrier. From the inside, you're screwed. Oh, hello, Male Me!" Girl Naruto exclaimed. "I think we should use the office. The twins have a lot of explaining to do."

Instantly, the twins looked up before pointing a finger at each other.

"He did it!"

"She did it!"

 _Shikamira_

"What have you done to the office?!" Mom screeched with horror as she pushed past Guy Mom. "There are documents in here from November! It's," she paused to look at the calendar, "July!"

"Those are classified-" Guy Mom tried when Mom snorted.

"Seventh Hokage, Me! Of course, I can read these! Though your penmanship is awful!"

"Can someone explain to me what the hell is going on?" Temari finally snapped as the two Hokages fell quiet. The room was stuffed to the brim with the everyone that Mira's met since being here. Plus her family, whose presence was causing havoc, again.

"I think we would all like that. Well Shikamira, Takashi, care to explain why you two decided that dimension-hopping with your sisters was a good idea?" Dad drawled as Mom pushed herself away from the desk to stand by him, looping her left arm around his right one so that it looked like he was escorting her. The room was giving them weirded out looks but as usual, her parents didn't give a shit.

"Um, well, I guess we should redo our introductions. Just don't interrupt us, we'll answer all of your questions, I promise." Mira started nervously, scratching the back of her head. "I'm full name is Shikamira Nara Uzumaki. I'm 13 years-old, I'm a Chunin, and I'm apart of Team 7 back at home, with Sarada Uchiha and Kenji Hyuga. Our Sensei is Lee-Sensei."

Sarada jaw-dropped as Lee-Sensei looked ready to cast his rainbow genjutsu but his former teammate held him down. Both of this world's Ino-Shika-Cho trio looked at her in shock and were about to interrupt when Taka took over.

"I'm Takashi Nara Uzumaki. I'm also 13 and a Chunin. My team is Team 10 so yeah, I'm the Shika of Ino-Shika-Cho. Inojin's the Ino and Chocho's the Cho. Konohamaru-Sensei is our Sensei, which is a drag. Whatever. We'll example in a bit. Beni." Beni shot up over Taka's shoulder and smiled at everyone.

"I'm Benihime Nara Uzumaki but you can still call me Beni! I'm in the academy with Shino-Sensei and it's awesome! Oh!" In a second, Kubikiribocho was released, completely sheathed onto her back. Taka groaned at the new weight.

"Sorry Taka! This is Kubikiribocho but I call her Kubi!"

"How did you even get a hold of that?" Uncle Kakashi interrupted, the horror plastered on his face. "And why is your seven-year-old giving it a nickname?!"

"Kisame-Sensei gave Kubi to me, Uncle Kakashi! And Kubi isn't an it, she has feelings!" Beni huffed. The adults all tensed and screeched,

"Kisame's alive?" The Nara Uzumakis all blinked at them.

"He's not alive here? Ha!" Mom started laughing. "I can't wait to tell him about this next time we bring Benihime to her lessons!"

"You're letting an S-Class missing-nin from the Bloody Mist teach your daughter sword fighting?!" Ino yelled.

"Of course!" Mom said, completely unfazed by their reactions. "Kisame knows what he's doing. Who better to teach her than someone who was apart of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen!"

"Besides, Chojuro's too busy and Kisame owed us a favor." Dad added, lighting a cigarette before tossing his pack and lighter to Not Dad. Not Dad caught it, looking up at his counterpart.

"You looked like you could use one." Dad shrugged. Not Dad nodded in thanks and took a drag of his smoke.

"How are you handling this so calmly?!" Guy Mom shouted next. Dad pointed to Mom.

"Nothing is impossible with her." Dad drawled, smirking fondly. "You get desensitized after a while."

"You always say the sweetest things, Shikamaru." Mom teased sarcastically but had a soft smile on her lips.

"Alright, let's get back on track!" Guy Mom ordered, clearly disturbed by Mom and Dad's weird flirting. "I believe Motoko's next."

Motoko stepped forward before giving a bow to everyone.

"I'm Motoko Nara Uzumaki. I'm 4 years-old and I'm just starting my training. I can hold Shadow Possession Jutsu for 3 minutes." Motoko said causing Not Dad and Dai to stare at her in shock.

"But I can only hold mine for 4 minutes!" Dai stated in disbelief. Motoko cocked her head to the side before Dad explained.

"That would be the Uzumaki side kicking. All of our kids have larger than average chakra reserves."

"Just how big are we talking?" Uncle Sasuke asked. Mom snapped her head in his direction, staring at him in disbelief before she appeared in front of him, shocking the other adults.

"Hey!" Sakura Uchiha shouted at Mom, which she ignored. Mom inspected Sasuke before exclaiming,

"You are Sasuke! What the Hell? Yours speaks?!" Mom yelled her question at Guy Mom, turning to face her counterpart, pointing back at the male Uchiha. "I had to create a new language for mine! Do you know how hard it is to learn Uchihaniese?!"

The room couldn't decide if they wanted to laugh at her insanity or shutter in fear. Her husband and kids just sweat-dropped, used to the woman's behavior.

"To answer your question, Shikamira and Takashi already have the chakra reserves of a seasoned jonin while Motoko and Benihime have low to mid-level chunin reserves." Dad explained, ignoring everyone's gaping expressions when Motoko pulled on his pants. "Yes, Little Fawn?"

Motoko reached out her hand. She grasped Dad's hand before pulling him. Dad let her pull him as Mom stepped away from Uncle Sasuke, watching the scene unfold with a loving smile on her face. Motoko lead Dad to were Not Dad and Dai were sitting, walking straight past Temari as she did so. Motoko stopped in front of the father and son before looking up at Dad.

"Daddy, this is Other Daddy and his son, Shikadai. Mira and I called him Dai." Motoko started, carefully. The child took her time, emphasizing words in serious cuteness. "Other Daddy took very good care of me and Mira. He even made me eat my veggies."

"Oh, is that so?" Dad pondered with a slight smile, playing along as Motoko nodded seriously.

"And Dai got me dango and carried me to practice so that Mira wouldn't have to do it."

"I see." Dad said, nodding along. "Thank you, gentlemen." The two could only nod before Beni shouted,

"Mommy, Daddy, you have to meet Hima!" With that, the redhead dumped her sword into Taka's waiting arms before she leaped over his shoulder. Weaving her way through the crowd, Beni grabbed Hima and started to pull her towards her parents. But as she passed Boruto, she snatched his wrist too.

"Hey!" Boruto complained as he and Hima were pulled front and center before the Lady Hokage and her Commander.

"Mommy, Daddy, this is Boruto and Himawari Uzumaki." Beni introduced them. "Taka's been sparring with Boruto's team. He can do the rasengan too! And its invisible!"

"Really?! Oh, I've got to see this!" Mom chirped, the excitement lighting her cobalt eyes. Boruto looked up at her in shock, as if her excitement surprised him.

"And Hima and I are best friends now! I've been teaching her Fuinjutsu and she's very good at it! And she can already use her byakugan! Hima was the only one to figure out that Taka and Mira were twins which means she's really smart!" Beni praised. Mom chuckled before ruffling Hima's hair.

"Of course, she is! She's an Uzumaki! We're smarter than we look. Is this your daughter, Hinata? She looks just like you!" Mom asked, causing the Hyuga woman to nod.

"This is all very touching, but can we get back to the task at hand? Starting with why you guys lied to us?" Sarada demanded, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

"We didn't lie to you guys. We withheld information. There's a huge difference." Mira said as the focus returned to her and brother.

"When we first saw you guys in the backyard, I noticed how different everything was. Mainly that Lord Hokage's face replaced Mom's in the mountain. We determined that we were in a dimension where Mom was a man. So, before we met with Lord Hokage, we came up with a plan. Our plan wasn't to trick you guys as much as to save you all from confusion and awkwardness, we promise! The first thing we did was change our appearance slightly." Mira explained as Taka removed his hairband while she moved her forehead protector back onto her forehead. Taka's low ponytail fell before he gathered his hair into the traditional high ponytail of Nara men. When he straightened, he pulled his forehead protector way from his forehead and tied it to his left bicep.

"Much better. Aunt Ino, I don't know how you can fight with your hair in your eyes. It's a real pain." Taka grumbled, slouching back against the wall as everyone stared at him before looking back at Dad. Taka threw an arm over Shikadai, gesturing between them. Man, they really did look like twins. Especially since Taka's dark brown roots were visible again.

"I couldn't exactly show up with my hair like this." Taka explained. "It was also why I never stood next to you, man. We're too similar and you and Not Dad would have figured it out."

"Not Dad?" Not Dad asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Well, its not like we could call you Dad." Mira said before continuing. "Next, we used our Chunin names when we introduced ourselves. Long story short, when Taka and I became chunins, we decided to make everyone's lives easier. I'm Chunin Shikamira Nara. Taka's Chunin Takashi Uzumaki. We made sure to introduce ourselves first then say that the girls were our sisters."

"And we just assumed that you two weren't related." Uncle Choji realized, the dumbfounded look covering all of their faces. The twins nodded.

"Wait! You guys are chunins?!" Chocho shouted.

"Yep." The twins answered.

"And you didn't tell us?" Inojin asked.

"You didn't ask." Taka answered before continuing. "That's basically it, we weren't really hiding anything, just our parents. It wasn't like we could show up before Lord Hokage and call him Mom. Now that would be _weird_ and _disturbing_." Everyone shuttered. "That's why we were so formal with you guys. We've known you guys since we've been in diapers. It would have been really confusing with we started calling all of you 'Aunt' and 'Uncle'."

"Most importantly, we'd like to thank you guys for taking such good care of us. And for not sending us to T&I!" Mira said, bowing to everyone. Taka sighed, but did the same.

"So, any questions?!" Beni chirped.

…

"How are you two-"

"Who is Kenji-"

"Why are you the Shika-"

"WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT SWORD?!"

"Whoa! Guys, one at a time!" Mira pleaded. "Alright, Uncle Kakashi, you get the first question."

"Why did you guys claim that you were time-travelers?"

"We didn't." Mira and Taka stated in unison.

"Yes, you did!" Guy Mom, Not Dad and Uncle Kakashi protested.

"Nope, Guy Mom suspected that we were time-travelers because we said our Hokage was a woman, aka Sarada. We just didn't correct you." Mira explained, causing the three men to sweat-drop.

"Daddy says you shouldn't assume anything." Motoko added sweetly, cuddling against Dad. "You make an-" she would have continued if Dad hadn't covered her mouth, quickly.

"Shikamaru, what was Motoko about to say?" Mom asked sweetly, her glow of doom appearing. (Duh, duh, DUH!) Dad inched away from her nervously.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. Right Motoko?"

"Uh, huh. Give me our baby." Mom demanded, snatching Motoko away, shielding her away. "Honey, just because your father says something doesn't mean you're supposed to repeat it."

"But Daddy's very smart, Mommy!"

"Daddy is very smart, which means he knows better." Mom glared at him, causing Dad to hold his hands up in surrender.

"Ok, next question! Chocho, you're up!"

"Why is Taka the Shika in Ino-Shika-Cho?!"

"Oh, I'll answer this one!" Mom chirped, placing Motoko on her hip. "There are two reasons! The first is that when we," Mom waved between her and Dad, "were making the teams, we wanted to keep Team 7 and Team 10 in rotation. However, there would have been some problems if we had Shikamira with you guys."

"Why?" Both Ino-Shika-Cho trios asked.

"Inojin and I don't see eye to eye." Mira admitted, making Taka snort.

"More like you two fight like cats and dogs if you have to spend more than five minutes together."

"Well when he stops calling me Bitch then I'll stop calling him Bastard." Mira huffed, before she got a smack on the back of the head. "Ow! Mom!"

"Anyway, the main problem with Ino-Shika-Cho is that it lacks offensives moves." Dad continued. "Especially at a young age. However, Takashi is proficient in Shadow Possession Jutsu as well as taijutsu and fuinjutsu. Adding in Chocho being an Akimichi and Inojin's Beast Scrolls, we have an Ino-Shika-Cho trio that can take on more offensive missions while holding on to tradition."

"Even though my Shadow Possession sucks." Taka huffed, making Dai gain a curious look.

"How long can you hold your Shadow Possession Jutsu?" Shikadai asked.

"30 minutes, pathetic, right?" Taka stated, only blink in confusion at the trios' jaw-dropped expression. "Was it something I said?"

"How is that pathetic?!" Dai protested, causing Taka to point at Mira.

"Her record is currently 4 hours, 28 minutes and 39 seconds."

…

"What?!"

"Anyway!" Mom interrupted, continuing the explanation. "Team 7 lacked someone who wouldn't rush head first into a situation. So, we thought that having Shikamira on Team 7 as the strategist and counter-strategist would save us a lot of paperwork!"

"How come you guys are chunins? None of us got promotions because the Otsutsuki crashed our exam." Boruto whined.

"Oh, ours too. They just wait for it to be the big Kages' dinner before they attacked." Taka explained. "Besides, we forfeited."

…

"WHAT?!"

"Man, you guys are loud." Taka whined, pulling his pinky out of his ear.

"The third exam was a tournament, same as it always is. Taka and I won our first two matches, where we showcased our abilities. As a result, we were the last match. But Taka and I don't fight each other. We spar but we don't fight. So, we forfeited. It's a tradition!" Mira explained.

"And I was exhausted and wanted to nap. Besides, Mira cheats."

"Kunoichi. Like you're one to talk, Mr. I've Prepared the Field with Exploding Seals."

"Are you still upset over that? I thought you knew it was there!"

"Of course, I didn't know it was there, dumbass! You put a genjutsu over it!"

"That was the whole point!" Then, hands grabbed the back of their collars, separating the twins.

"Alright, break it up you two." Dad ordered. "Who asked the question about Benihime's sword?"

"I did." Sakura Uchiha said, bring Mom's attention to her. Mom's eyes narrowed dramatically. Mom lunged. Oh shit, not again…

 **Author's Note - Oh shit, Naruto 2.0 is pissed. But why? That's for next chapter! Don't worry guys, you're going to get more info but I thought that this was a good stopping point. Besides, I need a break and to figure out all of my ideas, you know. And Canon and 2.0 finally clash and everything is making sense. At least, I hope it is! Also, before people start saying 2.0 is too OP and perfect, just wait for the next chapter. Oh, and Naruto 2.0's fans! Spoiler, those were given to her by Shikaku and Yoshino when she graduated the academy, before she met Temari. Now, will Temari knew that? Nope! Adds to the drama, you know! Also, don't you love Naruto and Shikamaru 2.0's banter/flirting?! I love it! Well guys, review, favorite and follow! I love you guys so much! See you guys soon!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	10. She's Not a Bitch!

**Author's Note - Hey guys! I'm back and holy hell, was this chapter long and confusing to write. Trust me guys, I had to scrap this chapter multiple times to get it to flow nicely. But, I got it and now, I'm probably going to get some hate for this but bare with me. So, in Canon, we see Naruto and the gang take on hardships but a lot of it is physical, aka people they loved died. Konoha 2.0 has a crap tone of mental hardships instead, mostly revolving around having (or trying to have) relationships with people on their genin teams. And yes, this is also true in Canon but it's far more complicated in 2.0. As a result, I've made Sakura 2.0 the opposite of her character in Canon. You'll see this as you read. Also, I've made Sasuke 2.0 the way I've always imagined him when I was watching the anime. And judging by all of the fanfics I see, you'll guys will get what I mean. Last thing! I'm sorry if this chapter is too Konoha 2.0 heavy/fillerish. Next chapter, we'll get back to our plot, I promise! On to the story!**

Chapter 10: She's Not a Bitch?!

 _The Lady Hokage_

Normally, Naruto loved being held by her husband. His arms were home; warm and loving. Except when they were stopping her from committing a homicide. Then she didn't want to be held. Hearing Haruno and seeing her standing next to Sasuke made her see red.

"Let me go, Shikamaru!"

"Not the same person, Naruto." Shikamaru hissed into her ear, wincing as she elbowed him. "That's isn't Haruno, you can't kill her."

"Watch me."

"Mom, you're worrying Sarada!" Takashi called out, pushing Sarada forward. Instantly, she was before her not-really (but still is) goddaughter, pushing herself away from Shikamaru as he muttered 'Troublesome woman'. Kneeling, she held Sarada at shoulders length. She looked ok, a little beat up from the bamboo thingy but nothing too bad. Her hair was shorter and less glossy. But Sarada was wearing glasses. Karin's glasses.

"Are you ok? Your back isn't hurting? And why are you wearing Karin's glasses?" Naruto asked as she continued to check Sarada over.

"Huh, my back's never been hurt. And she gave them to me after my eyesight got worse when I had a fever when I was little." Sarada explained. Naruto nodded before shifting her eyes over to her best friend and the bitch. She need answers and she needed them yesterday!

"Sarada, I want you to answer me as honestly as possible, ok honey?" She asked softly causing Sarada to nod in agreement. Maybe this wasn't her actual goddaughter but it was still her right to ensure that Sarada was safe!

"Why is she," Naruto pointed to Haruno, "standing next to your father?" Sarada tilted her head in confusion.

"That's my mom." Naruto's head snapped up to look at Sasuke. He was watching her, unsure if she was friend or foe. Please, she was something worse than that. His sister. Not by blood, of course, but they were siblings none the less.

"Is she actually?" Naruto asked.

"Hn." Translation: Yes, and she's my wife. Good thing she was fluent in Uchihaniese.

"I see." No, she didn't see. Back at home, Sasuke was about as straight as a 45-degree angle. The only reason he had Sarada was because Karin was his surrogate. For what it's worth, when Karin realized that Sasuke didn't bat that way, she decided to give him the one thing that she could. It was a shame that she died during childbirth. Right, Haruno?

"Huh, I'm sorry, Haruno. Apparently, you aren't a vindictive bitch in this dimension." There, she apologized. Happy, Shikamaru? Her husband faced palmed as her kids sweat-dropped. What? She apologized! Not that she deserved an apology…

 _"_ _I got a letter from Sasuke." Naruto said as Motoko continued to feed. They were in her office, going over the documents that the other had to approve before Shikamaru started his rounds. Shikamaru looked at his nursing wife and Hokage. She had been Hokage for a year and half now. And naturally, she had been pregnant for the first nine months of her reign. Thank you, dear Not-So-Lazy Husband._

 _"_ _What does he want?" He asked, clearly uninterested as his sight returned back to their reports._

 _"_ _To know if his lover can apply for citizenship." That got Shikamaru's attention. He looked up at her in shock, making her snort at his expression._

 _"_ _What? Sasuke can't find love?" She joked, making Shikamaru shake his head._

 _"_ _No. I'm just shocked that he's actually being open about his sexuality for once." Shikamaru explained, which made her nod in understanding._

 _"_ _Well, he is. They'll be here in a week. I want to interview this guy before I make any decisions." Naruto determined before Motoko unlatched herself and gurgled happily. "Isn't that right, my love? Absolutely no one is good enough for Uncle Sasuke unless they have my approval."_

 _Shikamaru shook his head at his amusing wife before collecting his youngest so that she could fix her top. The amount of things Motoko's heard because they kept cribs in their offices… Motoko sighed, very happy to be with her daddy again. He started to burp their baby._

 _"_ _Are you going to tell Sakura?" Shikamaru asked, causing her to sigh and get up. Naruto turned to look out the window._

 _"_ _Sasuke said he sent a letter to her saying that he's bringing a traveling partner with him and that he wants to introduce him to Sarada. Since Sakura is still in denial about Sasuke being gay, who knows how she'll take it. I should talk to her though, shouldn't I?" She grumbled. Shikamaru walked up to stand next to her, pulling her against his chest so that she could see Motoko. Just the sight of her baby's smiling face made her nearly forget all of Team 7's dramas._

 _"_ _You don't have to if you don't want to. It's technically Sasuke's problem. Sakura's been raising Sarada because he's been off protecting the village. He has to actually tell her the truth that she doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell with him. She's not going to believe it from anyone but him and you know it." Shikamaru explained patiently so that she could let it all sink in._

 _"_ _Yeah, I guess you're right."_

 _It had not gone over well. Oh, the beginning of the day had gone well. Naruto had brought Shikamira and Takashi with her to greet the traveling pair at the gate because Shikamira had begged. Both were skipping again but since Iruka's teachers haven't found them yet, or sent her message, the twins must be doing something right. Besides, Shikamaru and her skipped all the time and look at where they are now._

 _"_ _Mom, where are they?" Takashi whined. "We've been here for ages."_

 _"_ _Try waiting for Uncle Kakashi, then talk to me about being somewhere for ages." Naruto said dryly before knocking her head to the side. "Oh, they're almost here."_

 _"_ _Eh?! Really?!" Shikamira asked, bouncing on the balls of her feet as her brother groaned, throwing himself back again his mother and shutting his eyes. In a second, he was out cold._

 _"_ _Lazy little brother." Shikamira huffed before squinting, smiling brightly. "Uncle Sasuke! You made it!" The young girl threw herself at her uncle, causing the stoic man to huff as he caught her. But there was a small smile on his lips as he allowed his goddaughter to hang off of him._

 _"_ _Did you bring Sarada and I anything?" Shikamira demanded, causing Naruto to chuckle before scolding her daughter._

 _"_ _Leave your uncle be, Shikamira. He's only been back for a minute. Takashi, wake up and greet your uncle." Shaking her boy awake, Takashi blinked before a smirk rested on his features. Straightening, Takashi slammed a fist against a flat hand and bowed, causing Sasuke to do the same. Then Sasuke ruffled Takashi's hair, making him huff with affection. It was good to have Sasuke back. She started tapping her foot, getting the man's attention. He looked up at her, giving her his classic 'Yes, Naruto?' face. She held her arms out._

 _"_ _I haven't seen you since my inauguration and you think we aren't going to hug? You need your yearly amount of Uzumaki Sisterly Affection." Naruto quipped as he rolled his visible eye but hugged her anyway._

 _"_ _Missed you, Dobe." He whispered, causing her to tighten the hug and whisper back,_

 _"_ _Missed you too, Bastard." Before she pushed him back, giving him a stare down. "And so does your daughter, who's waiting very patiently at the Academy to be picked up by you today, unlike two troublemakers."_

 _"_ _Hey! We did offer to sneak her out." Shikamira protested as Takashi looked past the gates._

 _"_ _Sir, do you need help?" Takashi called out, causing Naruto to follow his sight line of the man walking towards them. Oh, this makes much more sense now. The man was shorter than Sasuke but taller than her, his posture perfectly straight. He dressed in a light-weight samurai inspired outfit. His hair was a honey-brown, lightened by the sun. His features would have been considered dainty, almost feminine, reminding Naruto of Haku. At his hip was a sword. It was the man's feet and eyes that made her pause. He wore no shoes, his sole's blackened from the dirt. And he had bandages over his eyes. He was blind._

 _"_ _Oh, I'm fine. Thank you for asking. Ah, it's a pleasure to meet you, Lady Hokage!" The blind man said cheerfully as he turned and bowed in her direction. She nearly nodded to him before she stopped herself._

 _"_ _Thank you. You must be Ryuji." She said as Sasuke moved back over to Ryuji. He grabbed ahold of the blind man's elbow before the man huffed._

 _"_ _Sasuke, I'm fine. I can still sense where I'm going." Ah, he was a sensory type. And possible an earth-type. "And aren't you going to introduce me to your niece and nephew? Ah, never mind, you're in a 'Hn' mood again. Don't worry, I'll do it myself. It's a pleasure to meet you, Shikamira, Takashi." Ryuji said, bowing to her children in the correct order. Her twins shared a look before blurting out in unison,_

 _"_ _Are you blind?" They are so their father's kids…_

 _"_ _Kids!"_

 _"_ _Oh, don't worry, ma'am! It's alright! So, tell me, where's the best place to get food around here? I'm starving!" And with that, her kids were hooked. As her kids led Ryuji through the village, explaining in great detail the village he couldn't see. And he chatted back just as cheerfully, clearly enjoying himself. Naruto and Sasuke trailed behind then, the villagers staring at them in awe._

 _"_ _So, you found someone else to do all the talking for you?" Naruto teased, elbowing Sasuke._

 _"_ _Hn."_

 _"_ _He's different, isn't he?" Naruto tried again. To her surprise, Sasuke actually nodded and spoke softly,_

 _"_ _He knows." She looked up at him in shock. "I told him everything. My family, Itachi, the curse mark, Sarada, everything. He didn't leave."_

 _In that second, Naruto completely understood Sasuke. Their childhood, her years of having no one and his years of having lost everything, made them value the people who stayed. She was lucky, she knew that. Shikamaru's been that person for her since she was eleven. She tried to be that person for Sasuke but it wasn't the same. She didn't love Sasuke that way._

 _Instead, Naruto smiled at Sasuke, dragging him in to give him a noggie. He fought against her but heard her anyway._

 _"_ _I'm glad."_

 _She was at home, feeding the baby again as Shikamaru cleaned the dishes. The kids were in the living room, watching a new movie. Naturally, she founded herself ogling her husband because damn, could he pull off the apron look._

 _"_ _Well, what's the finally verdict?" Shikamaru asked, making her stop her staring. Dammit!_

 _"_ _Oh, I like this one." Naruto chirped. "He's good for Sasuke and doesn't take any of his, I Don't Deserve Happiness, bullshit. And he's fluent in Uchihaniese!" She smirked as Shikamaru sweat-dropped, not believing his wife's insanity._

 _"_ _Sarada liked him too. Thought it was cool that Ryuji walked through the village without bumping into anyone and anything. Apparently, he can use his chakra through his feet to send wave rays through the earth to tell what's there and what's not."_

 _"_ _So, he sees through touch?"_

 _"_ _Basically."_

 _"_ _That's impressive." Shikamaru praised, turning to face her as he pulled off his apron. "Were you staring again?" Instantly she flushed and looked away._

 _"_ _So, what if I was? It's not like you don't stare every time I'm feeding Motoko." She protested weakly as he smirked, the lust filling his eyes. Fuck, she was still horny. Stupid hormones…_

 _"_ _NARUTO! SHIKAMARU!" Well, there goes the moment._

 _"_ _Mom, Dad, Uncle Kiba's beating down the door again!" Instantly, Motoko was in her playpen, Naruto fixed her shirt and Shikamaru answered the door. Now, Kiba was still in fantastic shape, especially since he was Shikamaru's Vice-Commander. However, he looked like he just ran from Konoha to Suna and back to Konoha._

 _"_ _What's wrong?" Naruto demanded as the dog-man struggled to catch his breath._

 _"_ _She snapped." Instantly, her heart dropped to her stomach as Kiba looked up and his eyes glanced to Shikamira as if he didn't want to say anything in front of her._

 _"_ _Sakura. She snapped. Sarada's hurt and in the hospital."_

"What the hell does that mean?!" Haruno demanded, raising her fist in anger. Naruto stood up, ready to bitch slap her when Shikamaru slapped a hand over her mouth and pulled her against his chest. She had to fight the urge to lick his hand, no matter how kinky it would have been. He fisted her dress at her hip as he whispered into her ear.

"She's not worth it. And you're scaring the kids. We'll deal with this later. I promise." Sighing, she nodded. Everyone watched them in shock, clearly disturbed and concerned by her behavior. Great, smooth move, Naruto.

"Benihime has Zabuza's sword because I had it and I said she can have it. Chojuro and I wanted to strength the ties between the Mist and the Leaf by doing an exchange. Three of our shinobi will become apart of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen. Three of their shinobi will become apart of our brand-new Police Force. There, happy?" She explained, giving her male self an unamused look. He nodded, clearly not wanting to piss her off more.

Naruto couldn't help the comparison that she made between Male Me and her Sexy Jutsu form. Huh, she imaged his hair to be a little longer, honestly. At least he didn't have a dad bod. Her sapphire eyes shifted to her husband's clone. Yep, still attracted. Even still, her husband was better and sexier, in her own personal opinion, especially with the beard. God, that beard was sexy. Shikamaru must have knew what she was thinking because he was smirking around his cigarette. Ignoring the stares, his arm wrapped itself around her waist, pulling her flush against his left side.

"Ok, I'm going to shoot down the elephant in the room!" Ino shouted, pointing at Naruto and her husband. "How the hell did you two happen?"

"Not this again…" Takashi groaned as Shikamira whacked his shoulder.

"Oh hush, it's romantic."

"It's nauseating."

"You're going to have to be more specific, Ino. You're not going to get a straight answer from her." Shikamaru stated. "Besides, we have better things to do. Like discussing why No Name wants Shikamira and who the other kid is."

"Boruto."

Instantly, that got the rest of the rooms to focus. In all honesty, Naruto had forgotten about the Snake Sannin's experiment/son. Sweet thing, Mitsuki was. So, he was the third person on Boruto and Sarada's team. Interesting decision on Male Me's part. Speaking of Boruto-

"He didn't say anything!" Boruto exclaimed as he held Mitsuki's mouth. The snake boy blinked in confusion. Then Hinata grabbed her son's ear and pulled, making him release his teammate.

"Ow! Mom!"

"Mitsuki, what do you mean?" Male Me asked as he stared down his struggling son.

"Boruto's right eye makes a dojutsu like the byakugan but it's only in one eye and is light blue." Mitsuki explained with a smile, ignoring the death-glares from his friend.

"What?! He has what?!" Sarada asked her teammate. "I've never seen it before!"

"Of course not. Boruto can't control it. It happens sometimes when you two a sparing but goes away quickly." Mitsuki stated as he dodged a tackle from Boruto. The blonde boy sprawled out before her, nearly slamming into her knees. When Boruto tried to jump up, she clapped her hand on his head.

"Woah, Kiddo, calm down. So, you have an unknown Kekkei Genkaki. Now we know so we can protect you." Naruto stated as the boy looked at her. Then his hand slapped hers away as he stood, enraged. Shikamaru tensed beside her, but she put a hand on his arm.

"Don't order me around! You're not my mom! Or my dad!" Boruto yelled. Hinata and Male Me looked ready to yell at him when she nodded in agreement.

"You're right. You aren't my son. That doesn't matter." Naruto stated firmly, as Boruto's eyes started to widen as she continued. "You are his son." She pointed at Male Me. "And that makes you my family. Absolutely no one threatens my family and lives. It doesn't matter how you put it. While I'm here, if someone were to attack you, I'd throw myself in its path and fight for you. Do you understand, Boruto? This includes you too, Himawari, Shikadai."

The three children were looking at her in disbelief. The others were doing the same. Slowly, the three children nodded. Someone made a single clap. In a second, Shikamira had Boruto under one arm with Shikadai under the other.

"Congratulations, boys! You've official been adopted into the Nara Uzumaki family, Dai, Ruto! Taka's been wanting brothers for forever!"

"Finally, Dad, we're not completely outnumbered…" Takashi grumbled as his twin stuck his tongue at him.

"Yay! Hima, I can teach you more fuinjutsu!"

"Woah!" Hima cheered back as she high-fived Beni as Motoko smiled brightly from Takashi's side.

"Ruto?" Boruto and Shikadai asked in a daze. Shikamira made a 'duh' face.

"Nicknames, duh. You need one. All of us have one. Even Momo!"

"Just go with it." Takashi advised. "Her mind's been made and nothing you can say will change it."

"Shut up."

"Wait, you guys are staying?" Kakashi asked as his eyes narrowed. This got the room to stare back at Naruto and Shikamaru. The couple looked at each other before nodding.

"We are staying until we've help you guys eliminate this Otsutsuki." Naruto stated. "The kids are going home."

In retrospect, she should have expected the strong reactions this triggered throughout her kids. However, it was the reaction of all of the kids that shocked her.

"WHAT?!"

"MOM!"

"No, Mommy!"

"They just got here-"

"They are our friends-"

"But my Eternal Rival and I-"

"We finally got another girl-"

"Shikamira, Takashi, neither of you have any grounds to protest right now." Shikamaru reminded as her twins continued to protest.

"But Dad-" They started.

"Listen to your mother."

"Mom, we can't go back yet!" They protested. They must be really upset if they were speaking in unison again. The others looked at them, as if they were just realizing Shikamira and Takashi were twins. Man, they must have done a great job at protecting their identities. She was so proud!

"Please, there is very little you two can say that can change my mind. You four are going back home and that's final." Why was everyone looking at her in shock? Haven't they ever seen a mother put her foot down. _Or maybe Male Me doesn't put his foot down?_

"Mom, please, we need to stay here! These guys are our friends!" Shikamira objected as Takashi nodded.

"And Boruto and Himawari don't know any Uzumaki specialties whatsoever!" Takashi added. That got her to flinch in shock as she turned to face Male Me. _Impossible! Unless-_

"And I can teach Shikadai how to expanded his reserves so that he can do more advanced jutsus!" Added Mira before another idea came to her.

"We're also Chunins, Mom! We can be the squad leaders in case the Otsutsuki attacks! Taka can lead Ino-Shika-Cho and I'll lead Team 7!"

"We're not actually numbered-"

"Not important, Sarada! Mom please! We can teach these guys to protect themselves better! Please let us stay! We'll do anything!"

"Anything?" She pondered, as Shikamaru gave her a 'Really?' look. She elbowed him. Oh hush, Shikamaru, she knew what she was doing. Maybe…

"Anything!" Her twins agreed.

"Alright." Instantly, the kids cheered as she smirked. "You two are on probation the moment you get home."

You could hear a pin drop; the room was so silent. Actually, Kakashi was giving her a look of respect and had this 'Finally!' face. Anyway, her twins sighed, nodding in understanding.

"Geeze, do you not discipline your kids or something?" Naruto found herself asking Male Me, whose jaw was dropped.

"I do but, I don't know, probation seems harsh for something like this." Male Me stated. She shook her head in disagreement.

"Nope. They've done crazy stuff before but this tops off everything they've ever tried. Right Shikamaru?"

"Well, making the academy invisible for a week was pretty impressive." That got the twins shocked looks. They shrugged.

"We were bored."

"True, but this caused me far too much stress. How would you react when you realize that your babies are missing and the reason their missing is because the two eldest, _who know better_ , decided to create new jutsus unsupervised?"

"Especially when one of the jutsus contained a seal his mother explicitly told him not to use without her." Her husband added, making Takashi laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head.

"Oops?"

"They'll learn their lesson. They'll have a lot of time to think about it when they're on gate duty." She stated, as the twins sweat-dropped.

"And deer patrol." Shikamaru added as the twins got more depressed.

"Oh, and there are plenty of D-Ranks with their names on it. Tora missed you guys, by the way." She finished as Shikamira groaned and glared at Takashi.

"This is your fault!"

"My fault?! You activated the seal!"

"Well you-"

"Kids, enough, don't make me change my mind again." Naruto stated before she turned to Benihime and Motoko.

"Come on, girls. Time to go home."

Naturally, the girls reacted badly to this. Benihime's eyes widen dramatically as she hugged Himawari. Himawari did the same, as the two released their Puppy Dog Eyes no Jutsu. Motoko, being the little imp that she was, jumped up to Shikamaru and released her own version of Puppy Dog Eyes no Jutsu, complete with crocodile tears.

"No Mommy! Hima needs my help!"

"Please, Ms. Lady Hokage!"

"Daddy, I don't want to leave!"

"Um-" Shikamaru started slowly, because God forbid he make any of his girls cry. Looks like she was going to have to be bad cop. Again. She patted her husband on the shoulder as she swung Motoko up so that her baby was on her hip.

"Honey, look at me. No, you don't use Daddy to change my mind. You, and you, Benihime, are not shinobi yet-"

"I have Kubi, Mommy-"

"I know, Love, I gave her to you. You are still in the academy. And you, Ms. Motoko, haven't even had a day at the academy. You two are going back home where I know that you two are safe." Naruto explained, brushing the baby tears out of Motoko's eyes. Aw, her baby was actually sad. Then, Motoko's eyes harden as she looked back at Other Shikamaru and Shikadai.

"But Mommy, Other Daddy and Dai need me here." Motoko explained firmly, which caused Naruto to raise her eyebrow at the stubborn four-year-old.

"Oh, and why is that?"

"They don't have a Motoko." It was moments like these that reminded Naruto how much her kids were like Shikamaru. Sharp, quick and painfully blunt.

Instantly, it was like the room had dropped twenty degrees. The tension was suffocating. Ino and Choji tensed dramatically, Ino gaining a guilty look on her face. Shikadai just clocked his head to the side, confused by Motoko's statement. But it was Other Shikamaru and Temari's reaction that was the most telling. Other Shikamaru was as white as a sheet. His jaw was clenched, fisting his pants legs so tightly that he nearly ripped them. His eyes were pained, looking faraway with guilt and longing.

Naruto's heart really went out to Temari though. Her reaction sealed what Motoko in her childlike innocence implied. She had been standing, but now she was leaning against the wall for support. Her arms wrapped tightly against her stomach, her back hunched. Her hair shielded her face as her shoulder shook violently. Motoko continued before Naruto could stop her.

"Mira." The child pointed at Shikadai. "Taka." She pointed at Boruto. "Beni." She pointed to Himawari before shaking her head. "But no Momo. So, I'm going to be the Motoko here. For Other Daddy and for Ms. Temari."

Temari's head shot up to stare at Motoko. There was a plethora of emotions that swarmed those teal eyes. Pain, anger, sadness, forgiveness and regret. Regret was the most prominent. The Suna woman looked ready to cry, to shatter into pieces. Then, she breathed, as if this was the first time in ages she actually could breathe and regained herself. Then, she smiled at the brunette baby.

"Thank you, Motoko. Shikadai, your father and I have something important to tell you when we get home." Temari stated, completely at peace as her husband looked at her, cracking a pained but loved filled smile.

"So, are they staying or what?" Great, Inojin still had no filter here too. How the boy wasn't dead was a miracle to Naruto. But, it killed tension as all of the kids looked at them with impatience. Shikamaru shrugged at her.

"I guess if we could get someone to watch them, it'll be fine. But everyone here will probably be helping us so…" Shikamaru trailed off, making her think. Who could watch the girls and not lose their minds or lives while doing it?

"What about Grandma?" Two male voices asked, making Takashi and Shikadai stare at each other in shock.

"That was weird."

"Let's never do that again."

"Agreed."

"Mom?" Other Shikamaru asked, having regained his senses. "You want my mom to watch the girls?" _Hm, Yoshino, that could actually work!_

"Does she have her frypan?" Naruto asked innocently, only to get a deadpanned look from everyone. "Perfect! Ok girls, if Yoshino agrees and only if she agrees, you can stay."

"Yay!" Benihime cheered before pulling Himawari into a huddle like position. "Motoko, assume the huddle!"

"Mommy, down please!" Motoko demanded before rushing to the huddle, the three girls plotting.

"So, who wants to go get Yoshino?" Naruto asked only for all of the men to shrink back, including her own son and grandson, making Shikamaru groan.

"Why do I feel like I'm going to regret this?" He deadpanned.

…

"So, let me get this straight. You are my son with Shikaku from a different dimension who is married to the female version of the Hokage. These are your four beautiful children who have been here for three days and you need me to babysit the two youngest and Himawari so that all of you can go alien hunting." Yoshino summarized from her spot in the middle of the room, her sharp eyes analyzing the group. She looked exactly like her mother-in-law, right down to the pink dress and apron. There were more grays in her hair but her beauty was still there. The group stood tense as the Nara woman stalked up to her actually son and smacked him on the back of the head. Naruto's husband winced in sympathy.

"Ow! Mom!"

"Why am I just hearing about this now?! They've been here for three days and you didn't tell me! And wipe that smirk off your face, Shikadai! You are also in trouble, young man!" Yoshino scolded, making both flinch in fear.

"It's not like I knew any of this, Mom. This is all new to me too!" Other Shikamaru protested as his mother tsked.

"Don't give me that. I could have had the girls over for lunch regardless if they were my grandchildren or not. Now that they are, you have no excuse."

"So, is that a yes?" Takashi asked carefully, also fearful of the elder Nara matriarch's fury.

"Of course! In fact, you can all stay with me until this is all fixed up!" Yoshino insisted. Shikamaru blanched, holding up his hands and shaking his head.

"Thank you, ma'am but we just need you to watch the- Ow!" Yoshino had reached over to pull his ear.

"Shikamaru Nara, I don't care if you are my son from a different dimension or not. I have four other grandchildren I get to spoil and if you think you're going to get away from my questions, you have another thing coming. You are all staying with me and that's final."

"Yes, Mom." Yep, Yoshino was a force to be wretched with. The girls would be just fine.

With that, everyone went their separate ways and Yoshino made them a fantastic dinner. Afterwards, Naruto cleaned up and looked at the clock before her eyes drifted out the window. From the window, she could see the skyline of the village. The lights were beautiful in the twilight but there was one light out there that bugged her.

"Shikamaru, I'll be back." Naruto called out, making her husband poke his head through the doorway. Yoshino was in the living room with the kids, clearly adoring all of them. Shikamaru walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist as his eyes followed her line of sight.

"I'll come with you-"

"No. No, I need to do this on my own. Besides, you should talk to your copycat too. Bring him some sake. I think he needs it."

"He needs it? I need it. Only our children could do this." Shikamaru grumbled as he rested his chin on the top of her head.

"They are troublesome, aren't they?" Naruto quipped before twirling in his arms, kissing him before promising, "I'll be back to tuck Motoko in. Don't smoke too much. Yoshino won't like it if her guestroom starts to smell like an ashtray."

"Yeah, yeah." Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "Off with you, Troublesome Wife.

"Lazy Husband."

Male Me jumped when she knocked on his window, swirling around in his swivel chair. He stood to let her in. She hopped in, cracking her fingers as she did. He watched as she pulled up a chair and grabbed a pen.

"What? You looked like you needed help." Naruto stated as she grabbed a piece of paperwork. "And I figured we could talk. You've got questions, I've got questions, I'm helping you with your paperwork. This is a win-win situation."

She was rambling again because Male Me was being uncharacteristic quiet but he fell back into his chair. He looked so much older. But there was still curiosity in his eyes and he was growing more comfortable with each passing second.

"How did you guys get here?" He asked as he signed paperwork.

"Takashi created a seal that can hop dimensions. Or more specifically, hop from one dimension into its opposite dimension. A shadow dimension." Male Me raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"Did Takashi show you his seal?"

"He did."

"Well, the overlapping of the two seals can't occur without bridging it together. Shikamaru believes that when the fireball headed towards the kids, Shikamira was extending her shadow to shield her siblings from the attack. The shadow passed over the seal, successfully bridging the seals together and creating a portal that led them to a world extremely similar to their own but with one major difference."

"Us."

"You catch on quickly. Just another reason to hate being this child of the prophecy." She grumbled.

"You too?!"

"Finally, someone understands my pain! Anyway, when Shikamaru and I figured out what the kids did, we followed. Got any more questions?"

"What was that with you and Sakura?" She flinched at the caring in his voice over the pink-haired bitch. But perhaps this world's Sakura isn't a pyscho.

"Has she ever been tested for mental illness?" Naruto asked instead, making her male self pause.

"No, why?"

"I've got one more question before I answer. Did Haruno have an obsession with Sasuke when she was younger?"

"Well, she had a crush on him, but-"

"For how long?"

"Since she was in the academy." Male Me confessed, the confusion growing on his features. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Sasuke's gay." Maybe she should have worded that differently as her male self chocked on his water that he was sipping. She nearly laughed at him but the subject was to serious for her tomfoolery.

"I'm sorry, what?!"

"Sasuke's gay, homosexual, bats the other way, likes-"

"Please stop." It was funny watching her male self get so flustered.

"Well, he's always had been. Or maybe the fangirls made him that way." She wondered out loud. "Anyway, it was actually one of the reasons Sasuke had so many problems. How can he rebuild his clan if he couldn't see himself with a woman? After the war, he came out about it and I honestly didn't care because I always knew. But Haruno was in denial. Complete denial. She had built up this fantasy in her head that she would be the Lady Uchiha if she was patient. Sasuke would be hers and hers alone. Then, Sasuke's lover, Ryuji, convinced him to go home to visit Sarada. Ryuji wasn't originally going to travel with Sasuke to Konoha but Sasuke insisted because he wanted Sarada to meet him. Before Sakura's eyes, her fantasy shattered completely and with it, her sanity. She snapped and Sarada took the brunt of it."

Naruto had whispered out the last sentence, because the guilt still ate at her. Male Me stared at her in disbelief, before shaking his head.

"Ok, if your Sasuke's gay, how could he have Sarada?" Her male self demanded, ready to defend his teammate. She stood abruptly, and paced before the desk.

"Do you have a dear cousin, Karin?" At the man's wince, she continued. "Yes, well, she actually took Sasuke's sexuality better than Haruno did and made him an offer. She would bear him his heir and in return, all she asked was that the baby be well taken care of in Konoha. Sasuke agreed and Karin became his surrogate. They traveled together and as they approached Konoha, she went into labor at seven and half months. Sasuke took a risk and rushed her to the hospital. Karin needed an emergency C-section to save her and the baby." She paused, shutting her eyes so that she wouldn't see her male self's concerned face.

"She died?"

"Yes, she did. And apparently, her last words were for her doctor to take care of her baby. I'll give you one guess."

"Sakura? But-"

"Haruno let her die. She could have saved Karin but she chose not to because she wanted to Sarada's mother. Sasuke was actually distraught over Karin's death because apparently maternity made her less annoying. He stayed in Konoha for six months before we decided it would be best if he traveled again. And foolishly, Kakashi and I let Haruno be the one to raise Sarada in his stead. I should have taken her in and I've cursed myself for not doing so. At the time though, she appeared genuine in her love for Sarada. Years passed and Sarada grew into a beautiful young girl, strong and ready to take on the world. Yet, Haruno was waiting. She had changed her name to Uchiha, lying to us by saying she didn't want a different last name from her child. In reality, she believed that it was one step closer to her fantasy."

God, she needed a drink. Granny's stash should be somewhere, Ah ha! Male Me blinked as she pulled two sake bottles out from behind the First's portrait. She tossed one bottle to him as she took a large swig of her own.

"How-"

"Granny's stash. Always perfect for situations like this. Drink, you'll need it." He stared at her before doing as she ordered as she collapsed back into the chair.

"Sarada had invited Sasuke and Ryuji back to her house for dinner. Later on, Sarada told us that Haruno was tense but seemed fine as she hosted the men. But then, Sarada made the mistake of saying that she liked Ryuji and that he was good for her Papa. That's where Sarada's memory goes blank. Do you want to know the full report?"

"Please."

"Haruno had punched her threw four walls. Ino and Granny calculated that Haruno punched her so hard that it was the equivalent of her fall off of the top of Hokage Mountain. Sarada's back had shattered from the force her so-called mother used. The only reason Sarada lived was because I had put an ANBU guard on her without Haruno knowing. And that day was the only day that that guard had a medic in the group. Sarada was in a coma for three weeks, the house had collapsed from her being punched through it and her career nearly ended before it could begin. Sarada has to wear a back-brace now. It's a miracle that she's a kunoichi." She ended before draining the last of the sake before turning to face her copycat.

"I nearly killed Haruno when it happened. The only reason Sasuke didn't kill her was because Sarada needed him and that Haruno needed to go on trial. I had Ino go into her mind with the orders to break it if necessary. Haruno had a split personality, an Inner Sakura. Inner Sakura was actually Haruno's line of defense against mental attacks and the last bit of sanity left in Haruno. Inner Sakura revealed everything to Ino, every last detail in this fantasy. How Sakura let Karin die on the operation table. How she believed that it was only a matter of time before Sasuke realized that he 'loved' her. How if she raised Sarada, then Sasuke would marry her. How the fact that blind man who wanted to meet his lover's daughter made her lose her sanity. How her love for Sarada was a farce, just a step in her masterplan."

Male Me looked sick as the words sunk in. He chugged his sake before turning to face the window. He was watching her through the window, his mind calculating every sentence she had just said. He was looking for a lie. She wished that she was lying.

"I believe you." The Lord Hokage finally stated, turning back to her. "It seems impossible but…"

"It's always the quiet ones." She commented. "You'll have to forgive me for looking at that woman in disgust. Haruno lost my love along time ago. This was just the final straw. Now, judging by your reactions, the Haruno here is actually sane and that Sarada's her biological daughter. So, I'll be civil with her and all that shit."

"Do you want me to have her mentally evaluated?" Male Me asked. She paused before shrugging.

"It's your call. You know your world better than I do. If you do send her in, I'd suggest waiting until we're just a memory. Make it appear as if it's just a routine checkup."

He remained silent, his bandaged hand rubbing his temples as he pondered over everything that he just learned. The silence and tension were unbearable. Besides, she had an important question for him.

"So, mind telling me how you got together with my Matron of Honor?"

 _Commander Nara_

"That's a good wife you've got there." Mom stated calmly as she poured him, her alternate world's son, some tea. "And your kids are beautiful and smart. They must keep you on your toes."

"They're all troublesome, the whole lot of them." He said, sipping his tea as his eyes wondered to the living room where the kids were watching some tv. "Naruto, she's worst of them."

"Oh really?" Mom laughed. "You know, I couldn't see it until watched you two over dinner but it works. She's your yang to your yin, isn't she?"

"Yeah, she is." Shikamaru stated, his eyes rooming over to the clock. She won't be back for a while. Tch, Troublesome Wife.

"So, do I like Naruto back at home too?"

"Please, there are times where I think you love her more than you do me." That got another laugh out Mom too. "Do you not like Temari?"

That was the question that formed in his head when Mom had asked her question. Mom turned tense as she pondered over the question. Slowly, she shook her head before she started,

"No, I like her and she's good to my son. It's just been tense these past few years and she's never truly entered into her role as Lady Nara."

"Because of the baby?" Mom whipped her eyes up at him, the shock evident in her expression.

"You know?!"

"Motoko, while young, can read any situation. Her argument for staying here was that your son needed her here because you guys were missing a Motoko. The implication was there." Shikamaru explained as Mom sighed, a faraway look entering her eyes.

"It would've have been Motoko's age." Mom confessed. "I don't think Shikamaru and Temari truly ever got over it. They never told Shikadai. Why tell your only child that you lost their sibling before you could even tell him about it? There's more but it's not my place to tell you." He nodded in understanding.

"Do you mind watching the kids for a bit? I've got to have a conversation with myself. Man, this is weird and a drag." Shikamaru groaned, making Mom laugh before nodding.

"Go ahead, I've got this."

He got up, moving into the living room. The tv was on a kid friendly show for the girls as his twins played a round of shogi against each other. Shikamira's head shot up as he entered the room.

"Dad?" She called out as he walked closer to them. His heiress leaned against his legs as he approached her seat. She missed him, Shikamaru noted. Takashi also looked worried, his body tense.

"I'll be back in a bit. I need to talk with my clone. Be good for your grandmother." Shikamaru explained with a smile as the tension left his eldest children. Takashi's eyes shot up though, the worry in his eyes.

"Where's Mom?" Ah, Takashi, always worrying about his mother.

"Having a chat with Lord Hokage. She'll be back to tuck Motoko in. Be good, you two. And someone please brush Benihime's hair." He ordered, making Takashi laughed nervously. Shikamaru knelt next to the board, bring the two into his arms. Shikamira instantly latched onto him, her body shaking. Takashi was more reluctant but caved almost immediately. They buried themselves into his shoulders, both trying not to cry.

"It's alright, we're here and we are all okay. That's all that matters." Shikamaru whispered as Shikamira hiccupped, her grip around his neck tightening.

"I missed you, Daddy." Shikamira confessed, making Shikamaru shift his face so that he could kiss her forehead.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I couldn't protect the girls." Takashi confessed, making the father shake his head and tap his son's chin to get him to look up.

"Stop with that nonsense. You did a great job protecting the girls."

"But Mira-"

"Was separated from you by a chakra repressing barrier. You can't beat yourself over something completely out of your control. Don't be down on yourself, son." Shikamaru firmly explained as his boy nodded, using his forearm to whip away the rebellious tears. He just like his mother, always feeling guilty over things out of his control. Takashi was getting older; he was growing up to be a fine young man. But he was still Shikamaru's little boy, no matter how old he got. For the first time in a while, Takashi let him kiss his forehead. Shikamaru squeezed his twins tightly before releasing them.

"I'll be back soon. Be good."

Shikamaru made sure to grab some sake before he headed over to the main house. Huh, at least the front still looked the same. And Naruto's vegetable garden had poorly kept flowers in its stead. They also didn't have a porch, which was a damn shame. Where did his other self smoke? Tch, what a drag. Shikamaru jumped onto the roof where another person was smoking.

The advisor was leaning back against the chimney of the house, taking a drag. He stared at the stars, the red of his eyes prominent. He had been crying, Shikamaru realized as he moved closer. Advisor Nara didn't budge as Shikamaru sat next to him, popping open the two bottles.

"Please tell me you brought sake." Copycat pleaded, his gaze still locked on the stars.

"Any preference?"

"Whatever gets me drunk the fastest."

"Ah, the cheap shit then." That got a laugh out of his doppelganger as Shikamaru passed a bottle to the advisor. They both took a swig before Shikamaru reached into his vest pocket, pulling out his packet. Advisor Nara spoke as he lit his drag.

"I'm surprised you guys still use that style." Ah, his chunnin vest.

"They've been modified. We have the chest plates too but you get a choice. I preferred the old-fashioned look." Shikamaru paused, waiting for his other self to take another swig before continuing. "Besides, they're easier to take off."

Cough!

Shikamaru laughed as his doppelganger choked and splattered on his sake. The breadless man's cheeks were a rose red. As he regained himself, the advisor glared back at him.

"Was that really necessary?"

"Absolutely." Shikamaru affirmed before looking back as, you know what, let's just call him Nara from now on. Nara's eyes shifted back to the sky.

"So, do you want to talk about it?" Shikamaru asked carefully.

"No, but I should, shouldn't I? Tch, troublesome." Nara groaned before his eyes drifted down to the light escaping the house.

"When Shikadai was born, the pregnancy caused some complications. Temari had what is called a retained placenta. The doctors had to remove the placenta because it wouldn't fall out naturally. They missed some of it and it caused an infection. The infection- it essential made it so that if we did conceive, we had to wait three long months to ensure that Temari would actual carry to term. We've been trying for years and Temari's had four miscarriages. Most of them have been early on but still…" Nara trailed off, the sadness entering his eyes. Hell, he felt sad.

"She made it to three months." Shikamaru probed making Nara flinch before shaking his head.

"Four, we made it to four months. Shikadai was seven and just assumed that Temari had gotten fat. I had left to go with Naruto to a month long Kage meeting. One week of travel, two weeks of meetings and then one week to travel back home. We decided to wait until I got back to tell everyone. Ino, Choji and Mom knew and Temari had me tell Gaara and Kankuro when we got to the meetings. The day we got back, Choji was waiting for me at the gate." His voice was getting progressively shakier as he continued.

"I've never felt more small and helpless than I did in that moment. We got back to the house to find Ino scrubbing the floor raw, tears still falling. Ino had been visiting Temari while Shikadai was at school and they were cooking when it happened. Ino did everything she could to stop the bleeding before rushing Temari to the hospital. The baby didn't make it." Nara was whispering now, tears rolling down his eyes. Shikamaru didn't say anything as he reached over, clamping a hand on the other's shoulder. Finally, the man regained himself, wiping the tears away.

"We never told Shikadai until today. We should have but neither of us wanted to talk about it. Who would? So, we faked it. We pretended that everything was alright for him." Nara finished, swigging the last of the sake.

"Have you properly grieved?" Shikamaru asked as he thought about his kids. Then the horrid thought of Naruto going through the same thing made him sick to his stomach. He would say poor Temari, but Temari back at home was never one for sympathy. He felt for her, though, he really did.

"We are now." Hm, good. They needed it. "Let's talk about something else." Ah, Nara was curious.

"Ask away." Shikamaru said, reclining back against the roof tiles.

"Naruto, of all people-"

Instantly, Shikamaru shot up and glared at his counterpart, causing Nara to throw his hand up in an 'I surrender'.

"Choose your next words very carefully. You may be me but I reserve the right to beat your ass if your planning on insulting my wife."

"Troublesome…Not insulting at all. Just extremely confused as to how you two happened." Nara insisted making Shikamaru weaken his glare before nodding in understanding.

"Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Especially since she's a guy here. Well, if you want me to be perfectly honest, there's only been her." Shikamaru stated.

"What?" Nara blinked.

"I've known Naruto since we were eight. I was her first real friend and she was scared of me finding out just how badly the villagers and the academy treated her. When Naruto was eleven, I had walked into her apartment to find it absolutely raided. Every possession she owned was either smashed, stolen or pissed on. I saw red and moved her into the guestroom next to me room. She wasn't staying in that hellhole any longer." Shikamaru explained as Nara gaped at him.

"But that implies-"

"Yeah, yeah, that she was my intended bride and all that shit." Shikamaru grumbled. "Trust me, I knew that the moment I did that. She was worth it. The village got a message loud and clear. The jinchuriki they despised so much was going to be protected by one of the village's most important clans. Their bullshit was longer allowed."

"But to make that decision so young…" Nara muttered before the realization hit him. "Fuck, does that mean that old saying is actually true?"

"That Naras fall in love with the first person to challenge them mentally and emotionally. Yep, so far, it's true. Naruto and I have bet running on how long it takes Takashi to make a move on Sarada. The boy's been in love with her since he was fourth. He has Naruto's obliviousness though so who knows how long it'll take him realize his feeling." Shikamaru pondered. Nara made a face.

"You two bet on your son's love life?"

"When you have our normal wager, we bet on everything."

"What's the- No, I don't want to know." Yeah, Nara probably don't want to be scarred for life because Shikamaru had an extremely active sex life with his wife.

"So, there's been no one else? Not even Temari?"

"Nope." Besides, Temari was never an option because she was off being the Kazekage during his teenage years. (The Suna council wouldn't choose Gaara for Kazekage after learning about the Mizukage also being a jinchuriki. Kankuro was also a big 'Hell No!' Thus, Temari became the Kazekage instead. Now, Gaara was the Kazekage but he's only been in power for as long as Naruto has been.) If Shikamaru had to guess, this world's Temari was probably the Sand's ambassador while Nara was the Leaf's ambassador. Which meant that they spent a lot of time together and the rest was history.

"How?"

"Well…"

 _"_ _You head out tomorrow?" Shikamaru asked from his spot in the grass as he and Naruto lounged in his backyard. The girl in orange nodded as she moved to her side so that she could look at him better._

 _"_ _Yeah, Pervy-Sage thinks that the sooner I leave, the better. Those assholes are making some moves." She grumbled, her face sad at the idea of leaving the village for two years. Stupid Akatsuki… And hopefully, she was sad about leaving him._

 _"_ _Who's going to get into an argument with Chiyo for me if you're gone?" Shikamaru whined, dreading having to deal with the Sand elder by himself. His fellow chunin laughed at his despair, patting his chest. Unlike him, she didn't wear her vest often. Something about it being suffocating, whatever that meant._

 _"_ _You'll be fine." Naruto insisted before the nervousness entered her eyes again. "You'll write me back, right?"_

 _Shikamaru was her designated messenger while she was on this training trip. All of her reports would be sent to him via summons and he would deliver them to the Hokage. On top of that, Naruto wanted to write to him, just to give him a life update and check in. In reality though, it was to make sure that he would still care about her when she returned. Which was why she was being a ridiculously troublesome girl. Absolutely nothing would ever make him stopping caring about her. This past year that they spent together on mission after mission across the villages after their promotion just solidified his feelings for Naruto. He loved her, he knew that for certain and she definitely felt something for him. Yet, he couldn't tell her this, even if they were practically dating. They needed to be away from each other, to confirm their feelings once and for all._

 _"_ _Tch, of course. Troublesome Girl." Shikamaru confirmed, reaching up to grab her hand on his chest, lacing their finger together. She shifted closer, her blonde hair sprawling across his shoulder and the grass below them. She didn't do her normal 'Lazy Boy' which made him look down at her._

 _"_ _I- I'm going to miss you." Naruto confessed, her voice uncharacteristically softer as her grip tightened around his hand. His eyes softened before he shifted so that he could press a kiss against her forehead._

 _"_ _I'll miss you too."_

 _The next day was rough. Mom and Dad fussed over Naruto, with Mom triple checking Naruto's pack while Dad reiterated to Jiraiya, 'If Naruto picks up any bad habits from you or you leave her to go peeking or if you do anything perverted to her, I'll know and I'll end you.' Moments like these made Shikamaru question who his parents loved more, him or Naruto. He founded himself staring at her, in her orange and navy short, yukata kunoichi dress and her hair pulled back in a braid. Her, they loved her more. God knows he loved her more than anything else in this dangerous world. It was hard not to love her._

 _And before he knew it, she was hugging him goodbye at the gate. His team was there along with their senseis. Haruno wasn't there, which didn't surprise him one fucking bit. She's always been jealous of Naruto. He could hear Ino whispering to Choji that Shikamaru needed to 'Grow a pair and kiss her.' (Which, piss off, Ino, he has kissed her and sure as hell wasn't going to do it in front of Konoha's biggest gossip. The last thing need was to be question on why they weren't officially dating.) He didn't need to look at Asuma-Sensei to know that he was smirking at them. Asuma-Sensei was one of the first to pick up Shikamaru's attraction for the troublesome Uzumaki. Thus, it wasn't uncommon for the Sarutobi to invite Naruto to get BBQ or train with them, especially after Asuma-Sensei learned that she had wind release too._

 _Kakashi-Sensei was there too, reading his porn in daylight again. Shikamaru and Kakashi-Sensei had this weird understanding with each other. Kakashi-Sensei was fiercely protective of Naruto. Why? Well, he used to be apart of her ANBU guard and then there were other reasons that Shikamaru didn't know until later on. Anyway, Shikamaru was the only boy Kakashi-Sensei let near Naruto, which was saying something because nearly every freaking boy she's met ended up falling in love with her without her even knowing. Oblivious troublesome girl._

 _"_ _Come on kid, let's go! We're wasting precious research hours!" Jiraiya whined only to flinch back when Naruto sent a glare his way._

 _"_ _Stupid Pervy-Sage…" Naruto grumbled as she turned back to face him. "Give Kankuro hell and have Gaara write me a letter when you're in Suna. And you better not slack on your training, Shikamaru. Who else is going to cause mayhem with me with you can't keep up?" Shikamaru snorted as she flashed him a smile._

 _"_ _What a drag… yeah, you've got it. Do you have everything?" He asked and she nodded._

 _"_ _Yeah, I've sealed everything away. Good thing Granny Mito left such detailed notes about sealing."_

 _When Naruto was promoted to chunin, it had caused one of the Third Hokage's last orders to go into effect. The order stated that the moment Naruto became a chunin, Mito Uzumaki's possession would be passed to Naruto so that the girl could learn her heritage. That day had been an emotional one on Naruto. Just entering the First Wife's home got her shaking with emotions. When they used Naruto's blood to unlock the stash, Naruto fell to her knees at the sight of the dead woman's possession. Mito Uzumaki had walls upon walls of books and scrolls, a plethora of Uzumaki memorabilia and more clothes than Naruto could fit into her closet. Naruto learned about her clan that day and she made it her mission to ensure that the Uzumaki clan wasn't forgotten._

 _"_ _Kid-"_

 _"_ _Don't get your panties in a twist, Pervy-Sage. I'm coming." Naruto said before she hugged him one more time. His hands fisted her clothes tightly as she whimpered softly, trying to bury herself away._

 _"_ _Come back to me." Shikamaru whispered into her ear and she nodded against his shoulder. They broke apart and Naruto quickly used her forearm to wipe away any rebellious tears. She smiled at him and he smiled back as she turned to sprint over next to the Toad Sannin. Her golden locks shined as she twirled around, waving back at all of them._

 _"_ _The next time you guys see me, I'll be kicking ass and taking names! And that hat will be mine!" She promised. "Those bastards won't know what hit them! See you guys soon!"_

 _And then, she was gone. Two years passed and he trained harder than ever before. Every two weeks, he gave the Hokage Naruto's report before hiding himself away to read her letters to him. Most of them made him laugh, only she could be so ridiculous as to get into a fight with the Tsuchikage granddaughter over which release was better, wind or earth. (Wind is clearly the best, Shikamaru! You can use it anywhere, unlike as certain dirt-bound release!) Or how she got into a rap-battle with the Raikage's brother. (And he's a jinchuriki too, Shikamaru! I've got another teacher and this one isn't perverted! It's a miracle!) He sent her back letters, tell her about what's happening in the village. (I've got to run the Chunin Exams that we're hosting with Suna this month and it's a real drag. Kankuro doesn't do jack-shit and Gaara is scaring the genin again. Man, what a drag.) Or about he's personal and professional life (I got an apartment closer to the tower. That way, I can sleep in later and Mom won't nag me so much.) Years later, Shikamira and Takashi had found all of their letters. Shikamira insisted that they should publish them because 'They're so romantic, Daddy!' to which Takashi replied almost instantly, 'They're nauseating.'_

 _He had been escorting the Sand Bros back to Lady Tsunade's office. Kankuro was going on and on about how Temari was 'Yelling at me for absolutely no reason! How was I supposed to know that those papers were important?!' Gaara was walking beside them quietly, carrying their luggage behind them with his sand. They were staying here again for a month because of the upcoming Chunin Exams. Which meant that Shikamaru had to skip his nine o'clock nap. Again. Being the Leaf's ambassador was such a drag…_

 _As he opened the door to the office, he felt himself froze. It didn't matter that Haruno and Lady Tsunade were also in the office. It didn't matter that Kankuro was telling him to get his ass out of the doorway. It didn't matter that Gaara was actually smiling and waving hello._

 _Naruto turned to face him. Her hair had grown longer and she had it in a new style that looked too complicated for one person to do every day. Then again, this was Naruto and she didn't do anything half-assed. She was as tall as Haruno, no longer the shortest of the Kunoichi. Her navy and orange were replaced by black and orange. Her dress was still in the same style but- Shikamaru gulped- she had matured and filled out in certain areas. She was beautiful, absolutely stunning. Her sapphire eyes widen, her whiskered cheeks reddening before she stepped forward._

 _To this day, he doesn't know who grabbed who and he didn't give two shits. Her arms wrapped themselves around his neck as he lifted her by the waist, holding her close. She was skinner but packed with muscles and curves. He could hear Lady Tsunade chuckling as Kankuro spattered in disbelief. And Haruno, well, Haruno was being her jealous self. Because god forbid that Naruto's happier and prettier than her._

 _"_ _What the hell? You two were actually dating and didn't tell me?! Gaara, did you know?"_

 _"_ _They aren't dating."_

 _"_ _Bullshit! I call bullshit!"_

 _"_ _Hi." Naruto whispered. "Did I miss much?" He snorted as he put her down._

 _"_ _No. I thought you said you wouldn't be back for a month." Shikamaru questioned, making her do jazz hands as she stepped back._

 _"_ _Surprise!" Naruto cheered. "Granny called us back early. Besides, we were done anyway. Pervy-Sage just wanted to spend more time at the hot springs for his oh-so-important research." Her sarcastic words got a smirk out of Shikamaru. "How are you two doing, Gaara, Kankuro? Temari's not working you guys too hard?"_

 _"_ _She's a slave driver."_

 _"_ _We're good." The brothers said at the same time. You can guess who said what._

 _"_ _Anyway, I've got so much to tell you, Shikamaru but I'll do that after Sakura and I kick Kakashi-Sensei's ass!" Naruto was buzzing, bouncing around on the balls of her feet._

 _"_ _You can tell me all about at dinner." Shikamaru said, causing her to blush and give him a small smile._

 _"_ _Not dating, my ass." Kankuro grumbled, causing Shikamaru to elbow him._

 _"_ _Come on, Naruto. Kakashi-Sensei's waiting for us." Sakura said, looking annoyed, as usual._

 _"_ _Coming, Sakura!" Naruto said. "You'll find me if I'm not back by six?"_

 _"_ _Yep. I'll see you in a bit." Shikamaru said as Naruto and Sakura rushed out of the window._

 _Dinner had been at Ichiraku's. Naruto hadn't had it in two years and he could tell that she missed it. She wasn't even going to bring it up but when he suggested it, her smile told him just how happy she was. They were walking back, their stomach full as Naruto chatted on and on about her travels. It took her awhile but-_

 _"_ _Shikamaru, where are we going?" She asked. "The compound's in the other direction."_

 _"_ _I know. I want to show you something." Shikamaru said as he grabbed her hand. They entered his apartment building. His apartment was on the second floor, which meant less stairs (totally something he planned for). Choji lived down the hall from him and Ino was two floors up. Shikamaru was fairly certain that Lee lived on the top floor, if his shouts of 'YOUTH' were anything to go by. They arrived at his door. He unlocked it, opening the place to Naruto._

 _"_ _This is where I've been staying for the past year. It makes getting up for missions less troublesome and if I sleep in, Choji can come get me. It's not much but I like it." Shikamaru explained as Naruto surveyed the two-bedroom, one-bath apartment. The walls were a blue-gray. His living room, kitchen and dining room was one space, making the apartment look bigger than it actually was._

 _"_ _I like it!" Naruto twirled back to look at him only to reach up to catch what he tossed her._

 _"_ _A key?" She wondered, looking back at him. He shut the door behind him as he closed the distance between them. He cradled her face in his hands and leaned closer, giving her time to move away. She did the opposite. Her arms locked themselves around his neck as he kissed her, picking her up and moving them to the couch. They collapsed against it with her in his lap. She looked back at him through her bangs, gnawing at her rouged lips._

 _"_ _I want you to stay." He confessed, brushing the hair out of her eyes. "The compound felt empty without you. Your room is still the same but I- I've missed you. Stay with me. Please." He was whispering now as her eyes shined. They softened as she leaned closer, pecking him over and over again._

 _"_ _Yes, I'll stay. Only if you want me." Naruto whispered back, her face flushed. She fiddled with the zipper of his jacket, a nervous habit of hers when they did something romantic._

 _"_ _I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want you. Tch, Troublesome Girl."_

 _"_ _Lazy Boy." They shared a smile._

 _"_ _So, does that mean we're dating now?" Naruto asked, knocking her head to the side. He shrugged._

 _"_ _Only if you want to."_

 _"_ _Yeah, I want to."_

"And that's basically it." Shikamaru finished, tossing his dead cigarette.

"Your Naruto was a chunin?"

"That's your question?"

"Oh, trust me, I've got plenty of questions but that one's important." That got Shikamaru's intention. He whipped his head around to see Nara in his thinking position.

"You said that the orders from the Third were only to be activated when Naruto became a chunin?"

"Yes, why?" Then with the grave face, Nara turned to him.

"The Naruto here was never a chunin. He was a genin until after the war. That's why Kakashi made Naruto's promotion to jonin his first order of business as Hokage. And I think the Third here also had that order. And it was never activated."

 **Author's Note - Wow, was this a chapter or what?! I hope you guys like it as such as I do! Now, I'm actually going to confess something to you guys. Canon Naruto is stronger than Naruto 2.0. However, Naruto 2.0 is smarter. Thus, they balance each other out. Also, on the subject of the Uzumaki. All of the Uzumaki kids, this includes Boruto and Himawari, have insane chakra reserves. Boruto and Himawari just haven't been measured yet. Alright, next chapter we'll get back to our plot! I hope you guys like the chapter! Review, favorite and follow. I love you guys so much! See you guys soon!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	11. Sarada, Meet Sarada

**Author's Note - Hey guys! Happy MLK Day! Here's the latest chapter! So, the first half of the chapter moves along the plot. Answering the questions of why does the Otsutsuki want Shikamira and Boruto and for what reasons. Thus, I've dived into some Nara and Uzumaki history and I'm showing you guys my theory for why Boruto has his glowy, eye, thingy. The second half of the chapter is a clash between Canon and 2.0. I hope you guys like it and please, let me know if I'm getting too 2.0 heavy. I'll tone it back if you guys want me ! I'm an uncreative bitch who is using _All Started with a Smell_ as an inspiration for an important part of this chapter! All credit goes to that fics amazing author!Ok, that should be it! On to the story!**

Chapter 11: Sarada, Meet Sarada

 _Shikamira_

"You were never a chunin?!" Mom exclaimed as she paced before Guy Mom. Everyone had convened back at the Hokage's office after the crazy events yesterday. Shikamira watched with her friends as the adults looked on in confusion.

"Are you saying that you were a chunin?" Uncle Kiba asked.

"Of course! Shikamaru and I got it on our first try. Iruka couldn't believe it. Not bad for the two dead-lasts." Mom stated. Uncle Kiba still didn't believe her.

"Did we fight each other?"

"I kicked your ass."

"By farting in my face?" That caused Mom to make a disturbed face as Guy Mom laughed nervously, starching the back of his head.

"No! Really, Me?! Farting, ugh, no. I masked not just my scent but Akamaru's too with a jutsu I had learned when I was eleven. It stops animals from smelling hunters as they approach. Worked like charm." Mom explained before shaking her head. "But that's not important! First thing we need to do is contact our village to let them know that we won't be home for a while. Then we'll make a plan to fight Rice Otsutsuki and I'll deal with you guys not knowing anything about the Uzumakis. Which is blasphemy, by the way!"

"That's what I said, Mommy!" Benihime chirped from her seat on Boruto's shoulders. Beni and Himawari decided to switch brothers today so Takashi was carrying Hima. Clearly, the tactileness of Uzumaki women was true in this world too. And Motoko was being held by Shikadai.

Dai looked tired this morning but everyone had the decency not to say anything when he and his parents walked in. They offered physical comfort instead, like Aunt Ino hugging Temari tightly and Uncle Choji clapping a hand on Not Dad's shoulder. But perhaps the most significant comfort was by Motoko.

The moment the family of three got settled, Motoko was off. She leaped into Not Dad's lap and wrapped her little arms around his neck. She gave him a big hug and kiss on the cheek before moving to Temari and doing the same. The woman looked so uncertain, confused by why the child she had been glaring at for so long was being nice to her. Motoko had a big heart and she forgave people very easily. Then, Motoko got to Dai.

Motoko didn't jump into his arms right away. She stood before him with her arms raised. She was patient, letting him make the move because the smart four-year-old could tell how the news Dai received last night was affecting him. He looked ready to cry and Mira couldn't blame him if he did. Losing family was tough, even if you never knew them. Dai didn't cry though. He lifted the child up and held her tightly, blinking away the tears. His team walked beside him as he carried Motoko over to where Mira, her siblings and Boruto's team were seated. Dai sat next to Taka, who clapped a hand on his shoulder. Dai looked over at the twins and she gave him a bright smile. Slowly, he gave her a small smile back.

"Contact your world? How can you do that?" Mirai asked. The Sarutobi girl was still with the group, preforming her job as Uncle Kakashi's bodyguard. It was good to know that Mira's god sister wasn't too different in this world. Uncle Kakashi stood next to her, nodding in agreement at her question. Mom huffed, dramatically leaning her elbow on Guy Mom's shoulder.

"You are getting a crash course lesson on fuinjutsu before I leave." Mom promised, pointing a finger in Guy Mom's face. "Even if it kills us."

"And if I say no thanks?" Guy Mom joked causing Mom to snort.

"Please! I'll just order you."

"But we're the same rank!"

"I'm a woman and I said I'm going to teach you, so there!" Mom stated, bumping her hip with Guy Mom before turning back to Mirai. "To answer your question, honey, nothing is impossible with fuinjutsu."

"Honey?" Mirai blinked, causing Mom and Dad to sweat drop.

"Oops, sorry. You're our goddaughter back in our world too. Force of habit." Mom explained before stating, "I'm going to need a wall, preferable one without anything on it. And we'll probably need a bigger space too. Everyone, get ready to meet yourselves!"

"How about we make the plan first?" Dad suggested, holding Mom back as she moved to the window. "That way we can actually give Kakashi a date of return." Aw, Dad, stop being the sensible one…

"Fine…" Mom whined before turning to Guy Mom and nodded. "What's the plan?" Guy Mom blinked at her.

"You're letting me lead?"

"Of course!" Mom insisted. "This is your world! You know it better than we do."

"Alright then." Guy Mom stated before turning back to the group. "What do we know about the Otsutsuki?"

"They're aliens?" Everyone sweat-dropped at Uncle Kiba.

"Something more specific?" Guy Mom tried again. The room was silent before Aunt Hinata got an 'Ah ha' moment.

"The branches." Aunt Hinata whispered, before stating more firmly. "The branches have different interpretations of Hagoromo's teachings. Um, Lady Hokage, you knew who was Toneri when you were fighting him, right?"

"Yeah, I did. Did he try to kidnap you?"

"Yes, he did. I don't remember much because he had me under his control but I remember this! Toneri believed that mankind needed to be punished because he thought that we were butchering Hagoromo's teachings. He stated that this was the goal of the Branch family." Aunt Hinata started. "If I remember correctly, the Main family believed in the harvesting chakra. I'm not sure if it's to recreate the God Tree, but I think they want the chakra for something."

"What could they need more chakra for?" Aunt Ino asked.

"Yeah, it's not like they don't have enough to begin with." Uncle Choji agreed, sharing some of his chips with Chocho. That got Dad and Not Dad thinking though.

"You don't think…" Not Dad started, only for Dad to sigh and nod.

"What is it?" Guy Mom asked.

"This Main family member is looking for a specific type of chakra." Not Dad stated, getting a nod from Dad in agreement.

"No Name specifically wanted Shikamira and Boruto. I can think of a couple of reasons for this. The first being that their Uzumakis." Dad explained further, causing Mom, Guy Mom and Aunt Hinata to tense.

"Why just single them out then?" Uncle Kakashi asked from his window seat. "Why not try to get all of the kids?"

"Because they are different. Boruto has an unknown Kekkei Genkai. I would go so far as to say that this is a completely new Kekkei Genkai. The creation of mixing Uzumaki blood with Hyuga blood." Dad continued, causing Boruto to blanch.

"Ew…" Boruto muttered. Mira elbowed him softly.

"Just wait till you hear what I have." Mira grumbled before turning back to Dad.

"It would be no surprise if the Otsutsuki heard of a new Kekkei Genkai and wanted to take it for themselves, especially if one of their own is missing eyes." Dad stated. Guy Mom sighed before nodding.

"Alright, so they want Boruto because of his eyes. Why do they want your daughter?" Uncle Sasuke demanded. Mom and Dad glanced back at each before Mom huffed,

"Just tell them. I hate talking about it but tell them." Then Mom leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms. She faced away from Dad, her focus going out the window.

"Troublesome." Dad muttered as he rubbed his neck. "It all started when I died."

…

"WHAT?!"

"Eh?" Dai, Inojin and Chocho asked before Dai continued, "How is he still here?"

"How else? Mom. Sh, Dad's explaining." Taka hissed as they watched Mom roll her eyes.

"Really? That's how you're going to start off?" Mom grumbled, whacking Dad in the shoulder. Dad smirked back at her.

"I learned from the best." He tried getting her to smile. Mom smiled slightly before shaking her head.

"No, I'm still angry at you. Finish the story so I don't have to hear it." With that, Mom was back in a sulky mood again.

"I'm going to go off a limb and say Pain invaded your village too." Dad started, getting a nod from everyone. "After Pain reduced the entire village into a gigantic crater, Naruto arrived with her toads to fight him. After a while, I decided to go into the crater to help."

"No, you decided to go in with a broken leg that you had wrapped up with shadows, used up nearly all of your chakra against Pain and got skewered. You shouldn't have gone after me. You should have stayed with your father where you were safe." Mom interrupted, glaring back at him. Dad groaned.

"You're still upset-"

"Of course, I'm still upset! You died and you don't have a gigantic ball of chakra in you that can just heal you up willy-nilly!" Mom exclaimed. According to Aunt Hinata, Dad dying trying to protect Mom was heartbreaking to watch and Mom nearly released Kurama in her grief. Mom still gets upset talking about it because Dad has a bad saving-Mom habit. According to Mom, at least.

"I'm here now." Dad said back to her, pulling her against his side. "That's something, right?" Mom sighed, before nodding.

"You've got to stop making it a habit, though." Mom insisted. "Sorry, guys. Continue with the story, Shikamaru."

"Anyway, when I died, I entered a world between life and death. Waiting for me was an old hag. The first mother and Head of the Nara clan." That got Not Dad's attention. Well, it got everyone's attention but Not Dad was really interested now.

"What?!"

"Yeah, it was a drag. She insisted that we have tea before she explained the real reason for why the first-borns were important to the clan. Shikamira, come here." Mira moved forward and faced her father. Gently, Dad turned her so that she was facing the group and clapped a hand down on her shoulder.

"Every first-born from the main family in the Nara clan have pure yin chakra. They are Fertile with Yin, as the hag called it. With this chakra, any and all yin chakra jutsus can be accessed and used. Thus, no matter the sex of the baby, that child must have Shika in their name. That child would then become the Head of the Clan, a rule the hag specifically insisted on when the clan was first formed. The yin chakra is extremely powerful but it's also very draining on the body. As a result, most Heads and their heirs actually had dormant yin chakra and could only use their shadows for a limited amount of time. This was necessary to keep the balance." Dad explained, patting her shoulder.

"However, the hag explained that there was a way to awaken this pure yin chakra. Once this happened, any of the secret Nara clan jutsus could be used and the user wouldn't suffer from chakra exhaustion."

"That sounds impossible." Uncle Kakashi stated. "Chakra exhaustion depends on a person's reserves. Granted, yin chakra drains your reserves faster but you can't change how much chakra you have."

"Not unless your stabbed through your chakra reserves with a crap ton of yang chakra." Mira interjected, getting a pinch from Dad. Everyone looked wide-eyed at them.

"Let's me explain." Dad stated, rubbing his temples. "The hag decided to stab me through the heart with her shadow. Somehow, I absorbed all of her chakra in the shadow. This chakra was actually yang chakra. I don't know how, but when I came to, I has Ino tests my reserves because the hag told me to since I didn't believe her. My reserves, they had quadrupled in size." Jaws dropped all around.

"Shikamaru also lost most of his control when this happened. Shikaku and I had to put him on a strict chakra control regiment from two weeks before he was back to normal." Mom added.

"So, we aren't named after the deer?" Dai asked suddenly. Really, Dai? That's your question?!

"No, we are. The hag renamed herself to be Shika Nara. Shika after the deer that protected her in a dark, yin filled forest, the Nara Forest. The naming was as sentimental to her as it was symbolic." Dad explained.

"How is the connected back to Mira?" Uncle Sai asked.

"I was the first Nara in 16 generations to have full access to my yin chakra because of what the hag did." Dad paused. "But Shikamira is the first Nara to be born with it already awaken."

"How?" Mirai asked, her red eyes narrowing in confusion.

"Because of Mom." Mira and Taka said at the same time. Mom stepped forward before jumping backwards so that she was perched on an empty stop on the desk.

"Uzumaki History 101, we have large chakra reserves. Extremely large reserves that are specifically yang chakra based. Many people wanted to have Uzumakis be apart of their clans for that reason alone. However, our clan," Mom waved between her and Guy Mom, "was smart. Uzumakis only married civilians or Uzumakis that they had no direction relation to them. Keeping the power within the clan. That's why Mito Uzumaki being the First Hokage's wife was so significant and symbolic. Mito was the first Uzumaki woman to be married outside of clan. She alone brought Konoha a great power and wealth of knowledge, not to mention how powerful the Senju progeny would become because of her. Granny, being the main example. You guys following along?" Everyone nodded so Mom continued.

"Mito only had one child though, because she became the jinchuriki for Kurama shortly after that. Kurama made her infertile in retaliation for sealing him away." Gasps were heard around the room but Mom ignored it. "This was actually common practice amongst the Tail-Beasts, especially if the jinchuriki was a woman. The leader of the Uzumakis knew this when my mother was sent to Konoha. My mother didn't know until well after she was the jinchuriki. This was done on purpose. The large reserves of the Uzumaki must stay within the Uzumaki, at any cost. The only reason I was conceived was because Kurama wanted to try to escape my mother during her labor. He was only able to do this with help, but you guys know that already. There actually was a petition from the civilian council when I was ten for me to be sold to the highest bidding clan so that I could get a head start in birthing new, super shinobi. Luckily, Shikaku remembered how infertile jinchuriki women normally are and the clan council voted against the petition." Mom ignored the horrified looks she got from the room.

"Boruto is what happens when an Uzumaki mates with a Hyuga, creating a brand new Kekkei Genkai." Mom stated. "Shikamira is what happens when a large, yang chakra reserves Uzumaki mates with a controlled, yin filled Nara. That's why her chakra is different. You all noticed how her lightning was black. All of her elemental jutsus are. Her reserves are huge but any yang based jutsu that she uses gains a hint of yin in some way. Normally by color but some of her more dangerous jutsus gain a deadlier edge."

"Making Mira the perfect target for the Otsutsuki. One girl with a shit ton of yin chakra just waiting to be used." Taka grumbled.

"Benihime?"

"Got it, Mommy!"

"Ow, Beni!"

"Ok!" Guy Mom said, slamming his hands down to stop Taka's whining. "We know why they want the kids. Sai, send four ANBU teams to the Land of Rice. They are to locate this Otsutsuki and observe before reporting back here. They are not to engage."

"Lord Hokage." Uncle Sai bowed before leaving in a hurry.

"I also want an adult around all of the kids at all times." Guy Mom insisted.

"What?! Dad!" Boruto started to whine but stopped when his father's serious face turned to him.

"This is nonnegotiable, Boruto. I will not risk losing any of you to these bastards. For once in your life, son, listen to me." Guy Mom was almost pleading with his son. Boruto looked ready to protest some more but stopped and nodded.

"Good."

"There isn't a chance they go after Shikadai though, right?" Temari asked with worry. But Not Dad shook his head.

"No, his yin chakra is probably like mine, dormant. He should be fine." With that, everyone left the office to find a blank wall.

The group probably should have just met at the Nara compound to begin with. Dad was the one to remember that everyone back at home would be waiting at the house for either a message from them or for their return. Then again, it would have been rude to do that to Not Dad and Temari after the night they just had. Everyone was in the living room, watching as Mom drew chakra lines on the wall in a huge rectangle.

"So, what exactly is she doing?" Boruto asked.

"Like Mom said, nothing is impossible with fuinjutsu." Taka started to explain, drawing in everyone's attention. "The misconception is that fuinjutsu is just putting ink to paper and sealing away something. What it really is is intent and creativity. Chakra is in everything, we know this. It can be manipulated to do anything or be anything. You want to make a fire, manipulate your chakra and make it happen. Fuinjutsu is the manipulation of chakra at its most pure form. Granted, that tasks a ton of chakra to use, which why Uzumakis mastered fuinjutsu and used it for just about anything. Anyway, Mom wants to get into contact with our world so she going to manipulate her chakra to make it happen."

"So, are you saying that when you guys got here, you intended to make a seal that could bring you guys to us?" Dai asked. Taka shook his head.

"No. I wanted to make a better version of the Flying Thunder God seal. One that didn't require me having to write the seal on everything I wanted to teleport to. I was hoping to just think of the place and poof, there I was. Just imagine it in battle." Taka was daydreaming again. And Mira, being the amazing twin sister that she was, snapped him out of it by slapping him on the back of head.

"Ow! Mira!"

"Naruto believes that when Shikamira's shadow got over the seal, her intention wasn't just to shield her siblings from the fireball but to get her siblings out of there, not caring where they went." Dad picked up. "Thus, it modified the intention of the seal and the kids arrived here."

"When we recreated the seal, the only thing we changed was our intention. We focused on going wherever they went and that's how we got here." Mom explained before nodding. "Ok, that should do it. Shikamaru?"

"Yes?" Both Dad and Not Dad said at the same time, making everyone sweat-drop.

"The one that's my husband." Mom drawled as Dad walked up to her. "Place your hand here and focus your chakra." Dad did as she asked and the blue lines turned a blackish-silver, glowing brightly.

"Perfect! Alright, give it a minute!" The group watched as the rectangle formed a black screen, mimicking a movie screen. Then the screen turned staticky before an image of a thrown kunai rushed towards. Everyone jumped, even though there was no kunai actually coming at them.

"What the?" A young girl voiced called out and Mira started smirking. She pushed her way so that she was standing in front of the screen. There were gasps, of course. But then there was a barely audible whisper of 'Mom?' that came from Uncle Sasuke.

"Sarada, man, am I happy to see you!" Mira exclaimed as her teammate's eyes widen, giving off an award-winning impersonation of an owl. The Uchiha girl's jaw dropped as her eyes scanned the scene before they locked on her copycat.

"Mira, what did you do?!"

"Me?! Why do you always blame me?! It's Taka's fault that we're here and I don't see you yelling at him!" It was so unfair when her best friend sided with her brother, purely because Sarada was crushing on him. Sarada gave her a 'really?' face before rolling her eyes.

"It's always your fault. Taka just gets dragged along for the ride."

"Thanks, Sarada, how's it going?" Taka smirked as he moved to stand next to his twin, stuffing his fists in his pockets. Par norm, Sarada's cheeks rouged slightly before she rolled her eyes at him too.

"Don't you two do anything normal?!" Shit, she was in a buzz-kill mode again. Great…

"Aw, but Sarada, we have to do the impossible. It's a tradition." Taka drawled before pointing behind him at the group. "Everyone, this is our version of Sarada Uchiha, the next Hokage after Mom, of course. Sarada, everyone."

"And when she becomes Hokage, I'm going to be her Jonin Commander and Taka will be her advisor!" Mira promised. "We'll cause her _so_ much paperwork."

"I'm dreading it already." Sarada drawled with a small smile before turning to face Mom and Dad. Then her eyes widen.

"Uncle Shikamaru, there's two of you."

"Yes, there is, Sarada."

"Please tell me that Aunt Naruto made a clone and that its hinged into her Sexy Jutsu."

"Sorry, honey." Mom said before Mira interjected,

"Seriously, Sarada, keep up. We've fallen into a dimension where Mom's a guy, Dad's married to the big fan lady and Mom's kids have whiskers. All in the day of life of Mira and Taka!" The kids started laughing at her amazing speech. _Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week!_

Sarada sweat-dropped at her best friend's fanfare before shaking her head, laughing.

"Only you two can do this. So, that is me?" Sarada pointed to her glasses wearing self (For the sake of confusion, until the conversation is over, Mira's going to call this dimension's Sarada, Glasses.) Beni, being Beni, grabbed Glasses by the wrist and dragged the girl before the screen. While you could tell that the girls were the same person, their looks were very different.

Both girls were the same height, pale, and had black hair with their forehead protectors on their foreheads. Glasses wore a red top, had a larger forehead, a short bob and, of course, had her red glasses. She was pretty, no doubt about it, but she would be prettier if she restyled her hair and if you could actually see her charcoal eyes. Sarada, on the other hand, looked like a younger version of her grandmother and thus, her uncle. Her black bangs framed her face, making her doe-like black eyes shine against her pale face. Her hair was longer and glossier, something you could notice even though Sarada's hair was pulled back into a low bun. She wore a long-sleeved navy-blue V-neck, the Uchiha fan proudly on her right shoulder. Like Mira, she wore black leggings and black shinobi sandals.

"Sarada, this is world's Sarada is going to teach me how to shot a fireball!" Beni said in joy. Sarada face-palmed before groaning,

"No, she's not. Never again!"

"Aw, but-"

"No, no Talk no Jutsu, Beni!"

"As amusing as this is, Sarada, where is everyone?" Dad asked, making Sarada straighten and shift so that she was facing Mom and Dad. It was then that she noticed Mom had her cape on and that Dad was wearing his chunin vest.

"Ma'am, Sir." She bowed quickly to them. Mira didn't even have to look back to know that everyone was watching with confusion at Sarada's change from informal to formal professionalism.

"At ease, Sarada, we're off duty." Mom said, making Sarada stand up right before nodding.

"Got it. Well, everyone's outside training. Chocho and Inojin are doing the twins' chores and Kenji's doing the breakfast run. We've eaten you guys out of house and home."

"Score!" Mira and Taka high-fived. Yes, no stall duty!

"Why were you inside?"

The dimension hoppers froze as the girl on the screen paled further. Her eyes were laced with fear and betrayal. She opened her mouth to speak, when Ryuji entered the screen. His left arm was pushing Sarada behind him as he crouched low, ready to pull out his sword. He wasn't wearing his bandages today so everyone could see as the blind man blinked before he turned back to Sarada.

"Sarada, why are you talking to a wall?" Ryuji asked slowly before Mom called out.

"Ryuji, I've made it so that this wall can do a video conference between two dimensions. This dimension that my kids fell into is very different from ours."

"Just how different?" Ryuji asked as he moved out of his fighting stance. Sarada creeped out from behind him but the audience could see her fisting the sleeve of his left arm.

"Well, this world has me as a guy, for one. More importantly, Haruno's sane here and married." Mira glanced back to see Sakura's reaction. She looked insulted and confused. Guy Mom's reaction was interesting too. He was whispering to Uncle Kakashi, their eyes shifting from the Uchiha family to the screen then back to the family. Huh, Guy Mom must know.

"I see." Said the blind man (Ha, puns, don't you love them), though the disgust on his face was very telling of how displeased he was.

"Everyone." Dad started. "This is Ryuji. Ryuji, could you tell everyone to come in here?" Ryuji hesitated though, using the arm that Sarada held to pull her gently to his side.

"She's can't get in here? It's just an image?" He asked, facing the direction of Mom's voice.

"She can't. I promise." Mom reassured. Ryuji nodded before turning to face Sarada. He poked her forehead before stating.

"Your father left your medicine on the table. Shout if you need me." And then the blind man walked off screen, not bumping into anything. Sarada moved on the screen, reaching to the table before grabbing her painkillers, taking two of them.

"Is today a bad day?" Mira asked, making her best friend shake her head.

"No, I just made the mistake of sparing with Lee without Taka or Kenji to back me up. I'll be fine." Sarada was smiling again, though you could still see the tension in her shoulders. Taka's face filled with guilt.

"I'm sorry, Sara-"

"Takashi Nara Uzumaki, if you are going to apologize for nothing again, I'm going to have the me over there hit you!" Sarada huffed.

"Why were you inside?" It was Uncle Sasuke who spoke the question. Sarada looked up at him before a pained smile spread across her features. She looked back at Glasses.

"Man, you do have different life from me. You're lucky, you weren't living in a lie." She turned back to face her not papa. "There was an accident when I was eight, Papa. My back got hurt. I have to be extra careful when I spar but I'm getting better. I promise."

"How could your back get hurt?!" Oh no, woman, shut up before you get yourself killed! "I would have fixed it!"

Mom looked ready to pounce on Sakura as Sarada flinched back before she was shielded away by a tall man in black.

"She's doesn't have to say anything to you." Uncle Sasuke hissed. He was pissed off, beyond angry. His killer intent seemed to escape into the dimension. Everyone was tense as Sakura Uchiha froze at the vitriol in the man's glare and voice.

"Stand down, Sasuke. Things are different over here." Mom stepped into his sight, crossing her arms. He stared at her. Moments passed before he nodded slowly. He turned to his daughter.

"Go help Ryuji set up breakfast." He ordered softly. Sarada didn't even protest as she started to walk out view when Mira called out.

"3:00, Sarada!" Her teammate nodded and left. Aunt Ino and Uncle Kiba walked in. Their counterparts were wide-eyed.

"Holy balls, dude! It's suffocating in here!" Uncle Kiba commented before looking at the screen. "Yes, I'm a sexy bastard in that dimension too!"

"Don't get too excited, Kiba." Dad smirked. "You married a cat lady here."

…

"WHAT?!" Uncle Kiba looked like he was struck down by lightning as Aunt Ino chuckled.

"While Kiba has an emotional break-down, Ino, please inform Kakashi that we don't know when we'll be back but we're guessing around a week or two." Mom ordered, getting a nod from her fellow blonde in return.

"Come on, Kiba. You can walk it off." Aunt Ino insisted as she dragged the whimpering dog-man off screen.

"I feel so betrayed…"

"Hn."

"Yes, Bastard, we'll be careful. We'll check back in soon. And my house better be standing when I get back or there will be hell to pay!" With that, the screen went blank.

"WHAT WAS THAT-"

"Who's the blind-"

"I'm so pretty-"

"He's not married to-"

"She doesn't have glass-"

"Woah, guys! Stop! I can't answer any questions if you guys all talk over each other." Mom pleaded. It was Sarada (No longer called Glasses) who asked carefully,

"Why was my other self scared of Mama?" Mom and Dad shared a look before Mom turned to Guy Mom and shrugged.

"I'll tell them only if you want me too." Mom said. Guy Mom sighed before walking up to Sarada, kneeling and grabbing her shoulders so that she looked him directly in the eye.

"Sarada, you understand that Mira- Shikamira and Takashi come from a world that is similar but also very different from ours?" Guy Mom asked clearly so that everyone could hear him. Sarada nodded urgently.

"Yes, sir."

"Their Sarada has suffered some hardships and her family life is also very different from yours. You need to understand this, Sarada." Guy Mom insisted. Again, Sarada nodded but it was Uncle Sai who asked.

"How?"

"Well- Um, how do I put this, their Sasuke has different tastes." Guy Mom said nervously, glancing at his best friend.

"Meaning?" Uncle Choji probed. Guy Mom glanced back at Mom, who groaned.

"Fine, I'll tell them." She turned to face Uncle Sasuke. "You're gay."

 _Takashi_

"I knew this would happen." Takashi groaned as the adults started demanding answers from Mom and Dad. Apparently, this dimension's Uncle Sasuke wasn't gay. _Huh, could've fooled me._

"But- but Mama and Papa-" Great, Sarada was having a mental breakdown. What a drag…

"Woah, breathe with me, Sarada. In- and out." Shikamira coached. "It's alright. Just because our Uncle Sasuke's liked men doesn't mean yours is the same way."

"You sure about that?" Not now, Inojin.

"Piss off, Bastard." Mira glared at Taka's teammate before turning back to Sarada. "Besides, you're happy here with your parents and that's fantastic!"

"But why was your Sarada scared of her mom?" Chocho asked. Taka glanced back at the adults, who were yelling over each other.

"That's impossible!"

"How could he have-"

"So, that man was-"

"How youthfully different-"

"Well, since they're distracted, we'll explain." Taka stated before he gently pushed Sarada back into her chair. "Everyone, just remember that this is our world and that it's different from your world."

"Sakura Haruno was never Sarada's biological mother. Haruno was, well, I guess the best way to describe it was that she was Sarada's guardian. Sarada did call her mom but it was never, I don't know, in the same tone. Like Sarada subconsciously knew something was up. Anyway, Uncle Sasuke was off traveling and protecting the village. Sarada needed to stay in the village so that she could grow and become a kunoichi." Mira started.

"Uncle Sasuke's always been gay." Taka continued, then paused for a second. "Actually, Mom's theory is that his fangirls made him that way but who the hell knows. Anyway, he wouldn't marry Haruno because of it. However, Haruno was in denial about it all and was under the impression that it was just a faze."

"How does this connect back to Sarada's mom?" Boruto interrupted.

"We're getting there. Well, for one thing, Haruno was insane." Mira interjected. "She had this messed up fantasy in her head that if she raised Sarada, then Uncle Sasuke would love and marry her." Sarada turned even paler as Chocho leaned over to hug her.

"How unyouthful!" Lee exclaimed, getting nods from the Nara Uzumaki kids.

"Extremely. Here's the kicker. Nobody knew of this fantasy or masterplan, only until Ryuji entered the picture. Uncle Sasuke met him in the Land of Iron, the Blind Samurai Master. That's Ryuji's nickname. When we," Taka waved between him and Mira, "were nine and Sarada was eight, Ryuji had convinced Uncle Sasuke to, and I quote, 'grow a pair and visit your daughter, Sasuke!' So, they arrived in Konoha and it had been a good day."

"We all like Ryuji." Mira stated before Benihime jumped up onto Taka's shoulders.

"Yeah! He can sense anything!" Beni cheered.

"It's hilarious to watch him kick the newbs from the Police Force's collective assed without even unsheathing his sword." Taka added. "Not to mention, he's fluent in Uchihaniese."

"Sarada had invited Uncle Sasuke and Ryuji over to dinner. Sarada said that Haruno was tense but hosted them just fine. It was after dinner when the bitch snapped."

"Dai, Mira said a bad word."

"Sh, Motoko, not now." Shikadai whispered as the twins continued, the kids completely entranced by the story.

"It was bad. Really bad. We found out when Uncle Kiba beat down our door that night…"

 _"_ _Sakura. She snapped. Sarada's hurt and in the hospital."_

 _Taka remembers heart skipping a beat as his twin gasped, her hand slapping itself over her mouth. Beni was blinking in confusion, the little three-almost-four-year-old not completely understanding what was happening. Mom and Dad were tensed as they stared at Uncle Kiba._

 _"_ _Shikamaru, get Yoshino to watch the kids. Kiba, what room is Sarada in?" Mom demanded in a fury, her killer intent starting to leak as Dad rubbed her shoulders._

 _"_ _She's still in surgery. Ino and Lady Tsunade are doing everything they can but it doesn't look good." Uncle Kiba was trying to be vague so that the twins wouldn't understand what he was implying. Unfortunately, the twins were smarter than he believed._

 _"_ _Daddy, what's wrong with Sarada?!" Mira's voice was shaking as tears welled up. Hell, he was ready to cry. Dad gave her no answer but took her in his arms before he did the same to Taka. Sarada was important to them. She slept over their house so often that Mira had a bunk bed in her room for that reason alone._

 _The rest of the night was a blur. Mom had sprinted out of the house, the fear and worry gracing her features. Dad followed shortly after Grandma Yoshino arrived. Bedtime that night was tough. Mira refused to be alone so she snuck into Taka's room to sleep. When sleep didn't come to them, the twins made the executive decision to sneak out and go to the hospital._

 _The hospital's lobby was quiet at 11:00 o'clock at night but you could hear the running and shouting from the floors above. The receptionist spotted them when they entered._

 _"_ _What are you two doing here?" She demanded in a fervent whisper._

 _"_ _We want to see Sarada." Mira demanded back in a shaky voice. "Please, we need to see her. She's our friend." This must have been an old receptionist because she looked ready to say no when a voice called out,_

 _"_ _Shikamira, Takashi, what are you going here?" The twins turned to see Ryuji exiting the kitchen, a tray of coffee in his hand. He looked tired and guilty but he forced a smile as he moved over to them._

 _"_ _You two should be in bed." Ryuji tsked as he stopped in front of them._

 _"_ _We want to see Sarada." Taka stated this time. "We aren't leaving until we see her." Ryuji sighed before shaking his head._

 _"_ _She's not out of surgery yet." The blind man confessed making the twins suck in their breaths._

 _"_ _But she has to have been in here since 7:00 o'clock!" Mira exclaimed in worry._

 _"_ _She has." Ryuji confirmed before sighing. "Alright, I'll take you to your parents. Come on, you two." The trio moved towards the elevator. The ride up was awful, the tension growing thicker as the shouting got louder._

 _"_ _God dammit, Sasuke! You can't go off and kill the bitch, no matter how much I want to help you!"_

 _"_ _I don't give two shits! I want her dead!" They arrived to Mom and Uncle Sasuke having a screaming match, with Dad using his shadows to keep Uncle Sasuke in place._

 _"_ _Killing her won't tell us why she did it, Sasuke. We need answers and Ino needs her to be alive." Dad explained slowly to Uncle Sasuke, who glared furiously at their father._

 _Taka had never seen his mother or uncle so agitated before in his life. Mom was shaking with a combination of fear, fury, and worry. Her braid was in disarray and her knuckles were covered in blood, like she had punched someone and was too busy to wash off the blood. Uncle Sasuke's clothes were wrinkled to death, his cape tossed to the side. He was seething out killing intent and anger but the worry and fear was evident in how his eyes kept glancing back at the surgery door. The room stunk of betrayal too. Uncle Kakashi, Uncle Yamato and Uncle Sai all stood against the wall before the argue duo, their faces all grim. An almost reunion of Team 7 under the worst circumstances. It was Uncle Kakashi who spotted them as they stepped out of the elevator._

 _"_ _Naruto, your troublemakers are here." The Sixth Hokage drawled with a defeated tone. Mom must be really off of her game if she didn't sense them. Immediately, her and Dad turned to the twins, who stood behind Ryuji. Dad muttered 'troublesome' as Mom sighed and moved to them._

 _"_ _Kids, you're supposed to be in bed." Mom scolded, but her heart wasn't behind the scolding as she knelt before them. Her eyes were so sad that they scared Taka. Just how bad was Sarada hurt?_

 _"_ _We want to see Sarada." They said in unison._

 _The room stayed silent as Dad released Uncle Sasuke from his jutsu, the anger in the room being replaced by sadness. Uncle Sasuke turned away from them and leaned an elbow against the wall. He stared at his fist before his forehead rested against it, his shoulders shaking with emotion. Ryuji handed the coffees to Uncle Yamato before moving to Uncle Sasuke's side, placing a hand between his shoulders._

 _"_ _Mommy, Daddy, what's wrong with Sarada?" Mira asked. Taka grabbed her hand as their parents stayed silent and she started to cry. Seconds later, tears started rolling down his eyes too. Before they knew it, they were in Dad's arms in a waiting chair, Mom rubbing their backs._

 _"_ _Sh, you two. Sarada's been in an accident. Granny and Aunt Ino are doing everything they can to help her." Mom tried to offer some comfort but her shaking voice revealed just how serious the situation was._

 _"_ _What happened to Sarada?" Taka whispered as he buried his deeper into Dad's arms. "Who snapped?" The adults all flinched and looked at them._

 _"_ _We heard Uncle Kiba. Who hurt Sarada?" Mira pleaded. Before Mom and Dad could decided if they were going to tell them the truth, the surgery door slammed open and Granny walked out. She looked exhausted, with dark bags under her eyes. Her features were grim though and everyone stood tense. Uncle Sasuke didn't even look at her, his focus solely on the wall._

 _"_ _She'll live." Those were the first words out of Granny's mouth. Sighs of relief escaped everyone as Uncle Sasuke turned and collapsed into a waiting room chair, burying his head in his hands. It was Ryuji who answered to Granny._

 _"_ _Thank you, Lady Fifth." Granny didn't reply though, her lips thin as she crossed her arms._

 _"_ _What else?" It was Uncle Sai who asked the question. "What did Hag do to her?"_

 _Hag, that was Uncle Sai's nickname for Aunt Sakura. Mira knew this too which was why she gasped when she heard him. That meant… Aunt Sakura hurt Sarada… Granny sighed before stating slowly._

 _"_ _The likelihood of Sarada becoming a kunoichi is extremely small. Her back was completely shattered when she arrived. We had to place her in a coma to operate on her and it was a miracle we didn't lose her during the surgery. I'm sorry, everyone, Sarada won't be a kunoichi."_

 _Taka didn't know what caused such fury in him. But he saw red after hearing Granny's declaration._

 _"_ _You're wrong!" Taka shouted, jumping out of Dad's arms as he stood in front of Granny. He was glaring and shaking and he couldn't stop crying but that didn't matter._

 _"_ _Sarada will be a kunoichi!" He insisted. "Even if I have to carry her for every mission! And she will be the Hokage after Mom and she'll be the best Hokage we've ever had!"_

 _"_ _Taka's right!" Mira shouted, joining him. "Sarada's strong! This won't stop her one bit! We'll protect her! We'll teach her! She has our luck which means that she will get better and she'll be a kunoichi! Just you wait, Granny! Sarada's going to make you eat those words!"_

 _For three weeks, Mira and Taka alternated who skipped the Academy to sit at Sarada's bedside, talking to her in her coma. Uncle Sasuke stayed there too, holding her hand or brushing her hair out of her face. The other twin would stay at the Academy, taking furious but detailed notes in Sarada's stead. For once, Shino-Sensei didn't even complain, he just let them keep doing what they were doing. Their friends visited everyday too. And Mira and Inojin didn't even fight at all during those weeks, which was a miracle in it of itself._

 _The revelation of what happened was the talk of the village and definitely the hospital, seeing how Haruno worked there. Mom and Dad tried to hid the truth from them before deciding that them knowing the truth was better then them believing a lie. Taka had never felt sicker before in his short life and the violent need to punch the bitch was strong. When Sarada finally woke up, her first words were,_

 _"_ _Papa, why can't I feel my legs? And where's Mom?"_

The kids fell silent after the twins finished their tale, Sarada unable to look at her parents now. It was only then that Taka noticed that the adults had been listening in too. Mira had turned, to face Sakura Uchiha, who was crying.

"We noticed that you were Sarada's mother when I realized she had your forehead." Mira told the sobbing woman. "And this Sarada calls you Mama so I'm guessing you guys are really close and have a good relationship. That's why Taka and I didn't attack you when we saw you."

"Though trust me, I came really close to doing it." Taka confessed, stuffing his hands back in his pockets before slouching. "Your other self restricted Sarada into a wheelchair for a year and crutches for another. She's better now and while her taijutsu isn't what it should be, she's the best damn genjutsu mistress in Konoha."

"She's going to be the Hokage." Mira stated firmly. "It's the only thing she's ever wanted and she's going to get it."

 **Author's Note - Woah, was that a drama-filled chapter or what?! I hope you guys like it as much as I did. I've kinda made Sarada 2.0 the Lee of 2.0s generation. You know, told that they never fight again and they're like, screw you, I'm going to fight again and nothing you can say will stop me! Again, let me know if you like how the story is headed. We are going to get more action and that is a promise! So, review, favorite and follow! I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	12. Wake Up, Shikadai

**Author's Note - Hey guys! I'm back with chapter 12! And guys, it is so hard trying to not write Naruto 2.0 as an OP character! I'm trying my best, but if you guys have ideas, please, send them my way! Again, this chapter has Canon and 2.0 clashing but I'm doing this for the plot. You won't get why I did it until later but that's ok! Trust me though, while the chapter may appear fillerish, it's not! Ok, that should be it! On to the story!**

Chapter 12: Wake Up, Shikadai

 _Shikadai_

"Maybe we shouldn't have contacted everyone…" Takashi grumbled from Shikadai's side as the adults continued to have a major freak-out. Motoko was still in his arms, snoozing against his chest with her thumb in her mouth.

"On the bright side, it's out now. Sorry about that, Sarada." His twin said to the Uchiha girl who nodded back.

"It's alright." She spoke softer now, looking back at her parents as her mother tried talking to her father. He remained stoic, ignoring his wife's demands of 'Are you actually gay, Sasuke?! Were you just using me?! Answer me, dammit!'

"Is it really that big of a deal?" Mitsuki asked, knocking his head to the side in confusion. Aw, Shikadai had forgotten that Mitsuki was, well, asexual and didn't understand the importance of producing an heir.

"It is when you have to revive a dead clan." Inojin drawled sarcastically before he was slapped on the back of the head by Shikamira.

"Hey!"

"Bastard, this is not the time for you to be an asshole." Mira scolded. He glared back.

"Tch, Bitch."

"And that is why I'm the Shika in Ino-Shika-Cho." Taka grumbled before standing, popping his back. "Well, I don't know about you guys but I'm going to find a tree to nap under." He started to walk away when Chocho's hand shot out to snatch the back of his collar.

"Hey, you can't just leave. Lord Seventh said we need an adult with us at all times." Chocho reminded him. Taka's eyes narrowed in confusion.

"You're actually listening to authority?" He sounded surprised while Chocho looked offended.

"Of course, I am! What do you think I am? I am a lady of respect and beauty!" She insisted, making Inojin, Shikadai and Taka sweat-drop.

"Right…"

"Shut up!"

"Hey, I just remembered something!" Boruto exclaimed before pointing at Taka. "What the hell do you mean, Konohamaru-Sensei is your sensei?!" Oh yeah, Shikadai had actually forgotten about that fact.

"Troublesome…" Taka groaned before reclining back on the couch. "Dad was insistent that Ino-Shika-Cho be led by a Sarutobi. Mirai was trying to pass her Jonin Exam before we graduated but she failed the last section. So, we got stuck with Konohamaru-Sensei. He's not bad, I'll give him that but he's like Mom but worse. Way to bubbly for six am missions."

"Aw man, your Mirai didn't make it too?" Shikadai's god sister asked as she leaned on the back of the sofa. "Hope you guys don't mind the company. The old farts are arguing again."

"Mirai! You're here!" Benihime cheered before jumping her. "Can we get ice cream?!"

"Only if your mom and dad say yes." Mirai compromised, flicking the redhead's nose before turning back to the kids.

"Yeah, sorry, Mirai. You've got another exam in three months." Mira stated as she made mini braids in Himawari's hair.

"Well, I'll get it this time!" Mirai insisted before she asked. "So, who's your sensei?"

"Lee-Sensei." Mira answered with a groan. "Sorry Metal, but your Dad's a real drag. The amount of times we've had to race back to Konoha on our hands…"

"But Eternal Rival!" Metal sputtered. "You are too proficient in the Strong Fist to not have learned it from Father!"

"That's because I did learn from your dad." Taka said. "Mom and I were running one day and your dad insisted that my speed was too youthful to not know the Strong Fist. I train with you guys all the time back at home. I just wished you'd stop waking me up to do challenges, man. Nap time is my time. We've been over this."

"How can my other self handle having Metal's dad as a sensei if she's hurt?" Sarada asked, pushing her lenses up.

"Actually, Sarada's the reason we have Lee-Sensei as our sensei. I'm going to go off on a limb and say that your Lee-Sensei was also told that he could never fight again after his first Chunin Exams." When Mira got the nods, she continued. "Sarada had to go through a strict rehab to get to where she is now. Lee-Sensei made it his mission to get her back on her feet and he helped plan her rehab. Lee-Sensei's also redesigned a taijutsu style for her so that it's less stress on her back. Not to mention Sarada has a bad habit of not stopping before she hurts herself so Lee-Sensei watches out for that."

"That- makes a lot of sense." Shikadai noted before glancing over at the adults. The Lady Hokage had her hands up in exasperation as Commander Nara was shaking his head in disbelief at the other adults in the room. She pointed at Sasuke.

"Seriously, people! He is one man! He's not that important!" The Lady Hokage insisted before stating. "Besides, my gay-dar isn't going off so your Sasuke's straight! There, happy?!"

"How is that reliable?" Aunt Karui asked.

"I will have you know that I am the reason Kotestu and Izumo got together after the war!" Lady Hokage stated before her husband drawled.

"Naruto likes to play matchmaker."

"And I am damn good at it too!" The woman agreed, making her husband sweat-drop and mutter 'troublesome'.

"Don't ask." The twins groaned as the kids, and Mirai, turned to them. Ok, time to change the subject then.

"So, you mentioned a Kenji?" Shikadai asked Mira, getting a shock look from her before she nodded.

"Yeah, Kenji's our third teammate. He's Aunt Hinata and Uncle Kiba's kid together. He's a bit of a hot-head but he's our hot-head." Mira stated as Boruto gaped at her, his eyes flicking between his mom, her former teammate, and back.

"How did that happen?" Boruto asked. This caused a strange reaction from the twins, who glanced at each other before Mira said,

"I'm not sure if we can tell you. The story's really long and we don't even know all of the details."

"Let's just say that the Hyuga elders were assholes and leave it at that." Taka stated firmly. _Tell us something we don't know._

"Does he have the byakugan?" Hima asked Mira, who nodded.

"Yep and he has a puppy whose name is Hyorinmaru. Now, that dog is an absolute cinnamon roll that needs to be protected at all cost!"

"That's because you like cuddling with fuzzy thing when you're on-" Taka started only for Mira to gain a deadly glow.

"Not. One. Word."

"…Got it."

"Mira, Taka, Dai?" Motoko asked softly, making the twins and Shikadai look to her.

"Yes, Momo?" Mira asked. "Is something wrong?"

"Why is Lord Hokage's arm still hurt?" Shikadai watched as Motoko pointed to Lord Seventh's arms, which were crossed in front of his chest in a 'No way!' Because of his movements, the man's bandaged right hand was visible.

"Ruto, why didn't Kurama fix it?" Motoko asked Boruto, making him narrow his eyes dramatically before scratching his head, laughing with closed eyes.

"Oh! It's just a fake arm, Motoko! Kurama can't heal something that isn't real!"

…

Beni and Motoko were blink in confusion as the twins were whipping their heads around, comparing their mother with Lord Seventh. Then, Motoko nodded before looking back up at Shikadai.

"Down please." Motoko demanded him gently. Her face was serious for a four-year-old as Motoko marched over to the adults, who, yes, were still having a freak-out session. Weaving in and out of the adults, Motoko found her mother's dress. Lady Hokage had been standing off to the side, chatting happily with Aunt Hinata as they watched the speculate before them. Motoko grabbed a fist full of dress and tugged, getting the woman's attention.

"Well, hello, Motoko!" Lady Hokage chirped before she knelt before her youngest and brushed her hair out of her eyes. Motoko raised her arms to the mother, causing the woman to blink.

"Oh, what's this? You actually want to be held by someone who isn't Daddy?" Lady Hokage teased with a smile before she turned back to Aunt Hinata, cradling Motoko against her chest.

"Hinata, did you meet my youngest? Motoko's best friends with your youngest back at home!" Lady Hokage questioned, getting a nod and a smile from the Hyuga woman. Aunt Hinata was about to reply back when Motoko interrupted.

"Mommy, Aunt Hinata, Kurama's being very mean to Lord Hokage." How is it that a little girl who barely spoke could silence a room so quickly?! Just, How?! Lady Hokage raised an eyebrow at her baby as the rest of the adults looked in their direction.

"Oh? And how is Kurama being very mean?" Lady Hokage asked, playing along with her daughter's demand. Motoko looked over to Lord Seventh and pointed.

"His arm is hurt and Kurama's being a big meanie because he didn't fix it. Tell Kurama to fix Lord Hokage, Mommy. It's very mean."

"Hinata, hold my baby." Lady Hokage pushed Motoko into Aunt Hinata's arms before heading over to her male self. She stood before him and crossed her arms, tapping her foot. Sighing, Lord Hokage rolled up his right sleeve before presenting the arm to her. She paused though, as she reached for it.

"Go ahead. It doesn't hurt." Lord Seventh promised, getting a nod from his counterpart. She turned the limb over before stating,

"Amazing, it's like an actual arm and you can use chakra with it!" She looked up at Lord Seventh's. "Granny's work?"

"Yep. She used Hashirama's cells to make it."

"Why do you need it in the first place?" Ah, there was the magic question.

"I'm guessing we have different version of the Fourth Shinobi World War?"

"It seems so." Lady Hokage agreed. "How did you lose it?"

"We defeated Kaguya and then I had to crush Sasuke's, I Need to Control the World, delusions. Sasuke was being an ass, again." Lord Seventh's closed-eyes smile meant that he missed how the woman before him froze, her commander looking up from his cigarette in shock.

"Shut up, Dobe."

"I think we need to have a talk." Lady Hokage said, causing everyone to look at her as she collapsed into an open chair. "Kaguya Otsutsuki, you fought her?"

"Are you saying you didn't?" Lord Sixth demanded as the commander moved to stand behind his wife, rubbing her shoulders gently.

"No, we didn't." She confessed, before bowing her head at her counterpart. "The fact that you faced her and won… dear gods, we were lucky to have stopped Black Zetsu when we did. Kisame had switched sides shortly after Itachi died and when he found out who the new Mizukage was. That when he broke the genjutsu that Obito had placed over him. He had overheard Zetsu praying to Kaguya, saying that she would live again. Gyuki was able to tell us the story of Kaguya and how her sons sealed her away. I sent ahead the story to Shikaku, Granny, and A with some messenger frogs. We faked Kisame's death and Killer B and I entered the war." Her declaration silenced the room before a small voice asked.

"Storytime?"

"Yes, Motoko. Storytime."

It was amazing how quickly the room returned back to normal. Then again, Shikadai was pretty sure everyone wanted and needed a distraction. At the beginning, a lot of the war was the same for both world's but it was once they started getting into the details that Shikadai realized that there were some differences in the war, even at the beginning.

"So, you never met Mom?" Lord Hokage asked his female counterpart, which caused her to shake her head, her head down as Commander Nara drew her close.

"No, I never did…" She was depressed. "I only meet Dad when he was reanimated and that didn't last long."

"Only?" Lord Hokage asked her. "You didn't meet him when you fought Pain? He didn't put a little bit of his chakra in the seal in case you let out Kurama?"

"No." She shook her head. "Pervy-Sage and Granny believed that Dad was rushing when he sealed Kurama into me. Mom had already passed away. Kurama didn't kill her but one of the Zetsu's did. Had to make sure she wouldn't be the jinchuriki again."

"How did you first gain control of Kurama?" Lord Seventh asked softly after a few moments. "Mom had to help me. Dad was able to seal some of her soul away with me so that I could have help controlling Kurama when the time came."

"Man, I wish I could show it to you guys. That would make a lot more sense then me trying to retell it." The Lady Hokage pouted, gaining some of her smile back. An idea struck Shikadai.

"Maybe we could have Aunt Ino mind-link with you and then we can project it on the screen?" Shikadai suggested. Everyone's heads snapped over to look at him. Lady Hokage pondered his suggestion before nodding happily.

"Yep, that could work! Let's do it, Ino!"

 _The screen light itself before dimming, revealing a dark sewer. Step, step, step. Shikadai watched as a younger version of the Lady Hokage walked slowly in the low water. She wore a black and orange short yukata with black leggings underneath, her blonde hair pulled back into a fishtail braid as her bangs framed her determined blue eyes. She walked until she faced a cage._

 _"_ _Well, well, if it isn't Naruto?" A growling, low voice echoed against the walls as a piercing red eye escaped the shadows. Then orange fur revealed itself and there it was, the Kyuubi in all of its glory._

 _"_ _Where's your guard dog, girl? It's odd to see you without him in your shadows." The Kyuubi drawled sarcastically._

 _"_ _Shut up." She didn't sound upset. No, she was determined not to let him push her buttons. Miraculously, she floated to where the paper seal covered the lock and ripped it off._

 _"_ _What are you doing, Naruto? Is this a trick?"_

 _"_ _It's not a trick. You and I, were partners. We've always been. It's time for us to actually work together for once." Lady Hokage said as she pushed her left sleeve up, her fingers flaming with blue chakra. Shikadai didn't even have time to blush when the young woman opened her dress, revealing her chest binds and the black seal on her stomach. She slammed the chakra into her abdomen, unlocking the seal on her stomach. He watched as her seal blacken and the lock on the cage opened._

 _"_ _Rawh!" The Kyuubi roared as he pushed her away. Lady Hokage crossed her arms in front of her face, wincing as she flew through the air before she caught herself._

 _"_ _You foolish girl, you think that you can control me, control my power!" The beast laughed as it formed a Tailed Beast Ball before swallowing it whole. It roared at her as it gained power. She didn't flinch as the wind galled through the sewer, her eyes now revealing that she was in sage mode. She sprinted at the Kyuubi, a clone behind her forming a gigantic rasengan in her hand before she launched the attack at the beast._

 _"_ _Rasengan!" The ball of chakra was blocked by the beast's tails and for a second, it looked like she was being crushed by the Kyuubi's paw. Poof, the clone under the paw vanished as blue chakra chains wrapped themselves around the Kyuubi's torso._

 _"_ _Gah rah!" The girl yelled as she grabbed ahold of her owe chains and used the chains to throw the beast. As it slammed into the wall, the Kyuubi was pinned back by her chains as she threw another attack at him._

 _"_ _Wind Style: Rasen Shuriken!" The attack hit the beast square on. Then she grabbed ahold of the tail closest to her and pulled. She didn't pull back fur or shin. No, she was grabbing ahold of chakra and she was absorbing it._

 _"_ _Tch, son of a bitch!" She hissed as the Kyuubi fought back._

 _Then the Kyuubi smirked and the blue chakra slowly turned red. The red chakra started to sallow her._

 _Then the voices started._

 _"_ _Look, if it isn't the demon whore!" People were pointing at a little blonde girl walking the streets alone, no more than five years old in washed-out shorts and a dirty, large white shirt._

 _"_ _Do us all a favor and starve, demon brat!" The orphanage matron tossed a whiskered two-year old out into the snow. The child was ill properly dressed in the same white shirt as from the other scene and nothing else. No pants, no shoes, no jacket, nothing. The girl shivered as the doors slammed shut, her blue-eyes wedeling up with tears._

 _"_ _Oh, she'll never be a kunoichi! She's already a demon!" She was at the academy now, listening as the sensei reassured this as he introduced her to a faceless class, all of who laughed at her. She blinked back tears, forcing a fake smile._

 _"_ _I'm surprised that the Third let her live. Maybe we should do us all a favor and kill it!" The villagers hissed as she carried her groceries close to her chest, her head bowed._

 _"_ _There's the bitch, get it!" She was running, weaving in and out of the alleys as a mob tried to get her. She escaped but Shikadai couldn't help but notice that it was shadows holding the mobs back._

 _"_ _The villagers hate you! You'll never be the Hokage!" Shikadai looked over as Sakura Uchiha flinched. That was her younger self, now the Lady Hokage's teammate, yelling at her with pure vitriol after the Lady Hokage's younger self declared that she would be Hokage._

 _"_ _Die, you fucking bitch!" A chunin was standing over her in a forest. She was clutching a large scroll in her arms before a younger Iruka-Sensei shielded her._

 _"_ _Stay away from my son, you whore!" A civilian wife dragged her son off of the swing, the blonde girl only swinging beside him. She didn't even say hello to the boy._

 _"_ _No one will ever love you, demon. You'll never be a wife and you'll never be a mother. That clan and Hiruzen can't protect you forever. You are nothing but the demon girl. Don't forget it." It was an old council woman, her hair decorated with a bejeweled pin as she glared down at the younger Lady Hokage. She had her forehead protector again, but she was wearing an elegant kimono. A kimono that had the Nara clan's symbol on the obi. A promised bride's kimono._

 _She was flinching and shaking now and slowly, the Kyuubi was draining her chakra instead. Her right eye was now black and red instead of white and blue. She knelt, her grip loosening as she hunched her shoulders._

 _"_ _Just give it up, Naruto." The Kyuubi purred as she started to shake. "This hatred is too great, even for you to overcome! Embrace it."_

 _"_ _No, stop it, you're all wrong." She whispered, closing her eyes to shut out the pain. Then the image changed._

 _"_ _Troublesome Girl." She turned around, her eyes wide as she watched the scene before her. It was herself and a younger version of the Jonin Commander. They both looked Shikadai's age and they had their chunin vests on. They were walking through the Nara forest, but it looks like she had been running away and he had stopped her, his hand gripping her wrist tightly._

 _"_ _Let me go, Shikamaru!" She was crying. "You know what I am now! I've mooched off of you guys for too long and I've hurt your clan because I've been here! Granny will find me a new place and you won't have to live with a demon anymore!"_

 _She was pulled into him, so that she stared him dead in the eyes. His eyes were fierce but kind as he spoke slowly._

 _"_ _You, Are. Not. A. Demon. You've never been a demon so stop calling yourself one! I've know about the Kyuubi for years, Naruto, and it hasn't changed anything. You're just its jailer. I'm not leaving you and I'm not letting you leave me. We're in this together, remember?" He brushed the tears that fell from her eyes. She stared at him, as if it was the first time she ever saw him, before launching herself at him, hugging the life out of him. In their hug, the Commander shifted so that could whisper something into her ear. Her teary eyes shot open in disbelief before they softened and she buried herself back into the hug._

 _The image shifted back to sewer, when the Lady Hokage's eyes shot open and she roared._

 _"_ _AWH!" The red chakra receded back to blue as it rushed towards the Kyuubi._

 _"_ _You're wrong!" She roared. "This hatred that you have, it's yours but I'm going to show to you that you can overcome it! You're not alone anymore! Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu!"_

 _An army of blonde girls appeared, some releasing chains themselves to trip the Kyuubi as other jumped above the fallen beast, rasengans forming in their hands._

 _"_ _Rasengan Barrage!" The orbs landed on the Kyuubi but he got away, damaged but still standing. The original Lady Hokage rushed forwarded, a Rasen Shuriken in her hand. She got close and threw it, the attack whistling as the Kyuubi took it head on._

 _The remaining clones started to pull on the chains, grabbing the Kyuubi's chakra as the original absorbed it._

 _She was glowing, her hair loosened from its braid in a red and gold flame as her beautiful figure shined in what looked like a skintight jumpsuit of gold and orange flames._

 _"_ _How dare you, Naruto?!" The Kyuubi screamed, forming another Tail Beast Ball. Before he could toss it, she closed her seal. The cage closed itself on the Kyuubi._

 _"_ _I'm sorry, Nine-Tails." She walked closer to the cage, even though he was clawing at her._

 _"_ _I'll be back and then we'll talk. But I promise you, I'm not going to let those bastards get you. I'm going to be the one to protect you, Nine-tails!" She turned away from the beast, so she didn't see how it's red eyes softened slightly._

 _With that, the image shifted and the Lady Hokage was standing in a white, pink and gold walled room with Killer B and Captain Yamato. She was still cloaked in the Kyuubi chakra as she faced the two men. She flashed them a peace sign._

 _"_ _I did it!" She cheered before her head snapped over to Killer B. "B, duck!" She leaped over the male jinchuriki's shoulder, snatching the bandaged blade off his back. She slammed the blade to the ground before placing her hand on the bandages. Chains appeared, keeping the wiggling blade in place as Kisame Hoshigaki was spat out of the blade's mouth. The shark man was shirtless as he held his hands above his head._

 _"_ _Wait!" He shouted as the three were prepared to attack him. "I have information that you could use!"_

 _"_ _Oh! Is that so?! Sorry, bro! That's not going to fly, yo!" B rapped as Yamato rolled his eyes._

 _"_ _And why should we trust someone we killed already?" Naruto asked, snapping her fans open as their chain appeared, the weapon becoming glided with her chakra._

 _"_ _I broke the genjutsu used on me?" Kisame supplied before he rolled his eyes. "Look, I know you're good at sealing and shit so I'll even let your tree-hugger trap me and you can repress my chakra." The blue man offered._

 _"_ _I am not-"_

 _"_ _Ok, Captain Yamato, capture him." The not-yet Lady Hokage ordered, causing her superior to stop his squabbling. Doing the signs, the captain slammed his hands to the ground._

 _"_ _Wood Release: Four-Pillar Prison Technique." A wooden prison trapped the missing nin. The Lady Hokage walked up, placing her hand on the wood, adding a chakra repressing seal to it._

 _"_ _Fuck! Is this how civilians feel?! How pathetic!" Kisame complained before dodging as one of the Lady Hokage's spinning fans slid through the gaps of the cell, nearly clipping the man before boomeranging back into her hand._

 _"_ _Start talking."_

 _"_ _Wow, someone needs to get laid- Kidding! Kidding! Ok, Samehada, give the pretty lady the scroll." With that, the chained sword started coughing before it spat up a scroll._

 _"_ _So, is this a trick or are you just being a di-"_

 _"_ _No trick, Killer Bee. That scroll has one of Zetsu's plans on it." That got the three shinobis' surprise._

 _"_ _Zetsu, your spy plant thingy?"_

 _"_ _That's the one!"_

 _"_ _And how is he important?" Lady Hokage demanded slowly._

 _"_ _Well, apparently he has mommy issues. Read the scroll, it'll give you a better idea of what he's planning." Kisame stated as she unraveled the scroll, pouring over the words with B and Yamato reading over her shoulders._

 _"_ _The Otsutsuki?!" Yamato cried._

 _"_ _Yo, I thought they were dead, bro!" Bee exclaimed, pointing at Kisame, getting a shrug from the man._

 _"_ _Most of them are, including the big mama, Kaguya. Zetsu thinks that if he can get all of the tailed beasts he can resurrect her somehow. To hell if I know. I just wanted to get the hell out of there after I broke free from Tobi/Madara/whatever-the-fuck-his-name is control. By the way, he wants to destroy us all and I'm fairly certain that he thinks that the pipsqueak is the only one who can defeat him. So, little Mei is the Mizukage, huh?" Kisame laughed before he sat, crossing his legs._

 _"_ _Naruto, Gyuki says that this is bad, really bad, yo!" Bee exclaimed. "He's talking now, by the way!" B straightened before his Tail-Beast lowered his voice. "Naruto, Yamato."_

 _"_ _Gyuki." The Lady Hokage nodded back. "What's up?"_

 _The group watched as the tail-beast explained the sealing of Kaguya to the two leaf shinobis. Captain Yamato started to get paler and paler as the Lady Hokage started to wrap her arms around her stomach, as if shielding the Kyuubi away from all who dare want him._

 _"_ _So that's why the Akatsuki were after the jinchurikis. It wasn't world peace, it was-"_

 _"_ _To bring back the Mother of Chakra. Shit!" The Lady Hokage cursed before she pulled more scrolls out of her pooch._

 _"_ _Naruto, what are you doing?" Yamato asked as Killer Bee shook his head, returning back to normal._

 _"_ _Shikaku and Granny need to know about this as soon as possible! And the Raikage too!" She rushed as she wrote coded messages in a fury. "And Shikamaru!"_

 _"_ _Your boyfriend?" B asked. "Why him?" She looked up as if to correct him but stopped herself, answering._

 _"_ _Shikamaru's smart! A genius! If his dad can't think of a plan, he will! Summoning Jutsu!" She bit her thumb before summoning four messenger toads. She tucked the three of the scrolls into three of the toads, who saluted her before rushing off in speeds that shouldn't be possible. Then, she crossed her fingers._

 _"_ _Shadow Clone Jutsu!" A clone of her with the cloak of chakra appeared before nodding to her and sealing itself into the scroll. That scroll was given to the last toad, who left even faster than the other three._

 _"_ _Come on, everyone! We have a war to fight! Kisame, we'll leave you on this island. Stay out of sight. I'll find you when this is all over. Let's go!"_

 _The screen shifted to Naruto running with Killer Bee, Captain Yamato and Guy-Sensei running behind her._

 _"_ _Naruto, as much as I enjoy this youthful run, what's happened?!" Guy-Sensei asked as they sprinted through the mountain valley._

 _"_ _The reanimation of everyone, Kabuto's helped the Akatsuki by drawing us thin. Sending out kage level shinobis left and right to drain everyone and what not. The Akatsuki doesn't want anyone to be able to protect Bee and I when they attack us. They're after our Tailed-Beasts because they want to combined all of the Tailed-Beasts in order to revive Kaguya, the Mother of Chakra!" She explained as she ran faster, her worry evident._

 _"_ _Really?! How?!"_

 _"_ _By sealing their chakra together, giving her back the chakra that her sons spread amongst nine chakra beings!" Naruto explained before a deep voice called out to her._

 _"_ _Naruto, message received."_

 _"_ _What's the plan, Shikaku?" Shikadai gasped. This was the first time he ever heard his grandfather's voice._

 _"_ _The Raikage and Hokage have been informed of this change in events. They want you both to stay out of the battle. But you aren't going to listen to that, are you?" Grandpa Shikaku said through her mind. Shikadai could almost picture him._

 _"_ _Nope! Too many people need our help!" She chirped back, cracking a smile._

 _"_ _Well, my son thinks that you should send out as many clones as possible. The battalions are having trouble figuring out who are friends and foes. Shikamaru can sense the differences between them but no one else can."_

 _"_ _You got it! Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu!" A plethora of clones surrounded the running group before all of the clones leaped away in different directions._

 _"_ _Commander Nara, where is Konoha's Youthful Beast most needed?!" Guy-Sensei asked._

 _"_ _Kakashi's branch, in the Land of Lightning."_

 _"_ _Yosh! I'm off to aid my Eternal Rival!" The group blinked as the Green Beast disappeared down the valley._

 _"_ _Yamato, make sure he actually goes the right way." Shikaku ordered, making Yamato sigh in defeat._

 _"_ _Guy! You're going the wrong way!" And with the screen turned black._

"Woah, head rush." Lady Hokage complained grabbing her head and rubbing it. The hand that rested against the sealed wall had fallen to join the head massage. "Man, Ino, how to do you do that every day?"

"Practice!" Aunt Ino joked before stating. "Man, that was wild. Your memories are so clear! Like we were watching a movie!"

"Really?" Lady Hokage laughed before she nudged her husband. "Brings back memories?"

"Yeah, though I would have been very happy if we didn't have to go to war." Her husband drawled.

"So, Kisame stopped Kaguya's resurrection?" Lord Sixth sweat-dropped in disbelief.

"Um, yeah, I guess so…" Lady Hokage hummed. "If he hadn't switched sides, who knows what could have happened."

"Oh, we have a feeling." Dad said sarcastically, cracking his neck. "Naruto, I think we've found the someone luckier than you. Yourself."

Hours passed as the adults continued to compare their experiences in the war. Then, the women decided to make everyone lunch. Thus, the kids decided to do some training, with Mirai as their babysitter.

"Do we have to?" Shikadai groaned, shutting his eyes when Mira had suggested the idea. He was still holding Motoko, who was like a personal heat warmer, perfect from napping. Ouch!

"Duh, we have to be prepared! We have alien ass to kick!" Mira asserted, pulling his ear. "And you need to increase your chakra reserves!"

"You're not going to stab me, are you?"

"I make no promises." Great… What a drag…

"Ok, Dai, I want you to connect shadows with me." Mira insisted once the kids got outside. Mirai was off to the side, supervising them and watching the little girls. Taka grumbled but decided to take the remaining members of Ino-Shika-Cho with him to see what he had to work with. Team Boruto looked to be doing a taijutsu battle royal.

"You sure?" Dai asked, his arms raised to make the hand-sign.

"Yep, let it rip!" Ok then. His shadow extended and grabbed her.

"Shadow Possession Jutsu complete." Dai confirmed before straightening. Mira straighten too before laughing,

"Oi, Taka, Dai has a better grip than you!"

"Shut up, Sis! Get back to me was you can seal something that isn't a kunai!"

"Ignore him, he's on his man-period again." Mira joked before saying. "Yeah, your grip is strong, Dai. You're probably a prodigy here, right?"

"Troublesome, yeah. Or at least, Grandma says so." Dai said, moving one hand out and she mirrored him.

"No, this is great!" If she wasn't stuck, she would probably be bouncing with excitement. "Now we can go into the shadows!"

"Eh?" Shikadai asked but before he could react, Mira's shadow had taken over his completely and they sunk down into the shadows.

There was black and grays everywhere with flickers of light that created more shadows in the room. Dai brought his hands before him, staring at them. They were now varying shades of gray, which enhanced and empathized the details on his hands. There was a poke to his shoulder and he turned to face Mira. She looked like a black and white photo.

"Well!" Her voice was echoy. "Welcome to the shadows, Dai! This is where you're going to be mediating!"

"Mediating?" Dai questioned as she nodded, bringing her legs up so that they crossed. It was then that Shikadai realized that they had been floating.

"Yep! Before the hag stabbed Dad, this is how he started to increase his chakra reserves. Dad was trying to keep up with Mom when she was away on her training trip. So, he looked through the Nara library and found this mediation method. Just stay here as long as possible. When you feel yourself get low, break the mediation and come back up." Mira pointed upward to the opening that they had slide from. "Every time you do this, you're awakening more yin chakra and increasing your reserves. Well, that's it! I'll leave you to it!"

"Wait, MIRA!" But the girl was already out, waving back from the ground above him.

"Don't worry, I'll stay here to make sure to get you if you don't do it yourself!" The brunette called down from the light.

Well, this is a drag…

Shikadai had nothing else better to do so he decided to get started. He crossed his legs before debating how he should have his hands. Since he was in a pool of shadows, the rat hand sign was probably a good choice. Now situated, Shikadai closed his eyes.

 _Search deeper…_

 _Keep searching, boy…_

 _He shouldn't be listen to the soft voice. It was intoxicating though, her commands nonnegotiable. He felt his chakra, deep within himself. It was expanding and shifting. Almost as if there had been sand falling from one glasses globe to the other. Expect the once narrow passage way had been replaced with a funnel._

 _Yes, your father avoided my calls but you won't…_

 _Wake, boy, and embrace the yin that runs through you!_

"SHIKADAI! WAKE UP!"

His teal eyes cracked open. It was fuzzy, the person cradling his head above him a brown blur. As his vision cleared, Mira's sapphires blinked back tears. Passed her was everyone, standing around his laying form. Mom and Dad were leaning over them, the worry evident in their eyes. Mira's parents were off to the side, their heads bowed as they spoke softly to Lord Seventh and Sixth.

"Huh, your dad was right, Mira. She is an old hag." Shikadai joked lightly as she helped him sit up.

"You idiot." She grumbled, punching him lightly. "I told you to mediate, not talk to the dead." Before she bowed her head, whispering. "I'm so sorry, Dai."

"Eh, on the bright side, I can keep up now." Shikadai joked before he got an armful of his mother. His father's hand rested itself on his hair, patting it as the man muttered a 'troublesome'.

"Um, so what just happened?" Chocho asked.

"Dai may or may not have awakened his yin chakra and I may or may not have helped him do it…" Mira confessed, scratching the back of her neck. Taka face-palmed.

"Good going, Mira."

"Shut up, Taka!"

 _The Lord Hokage_

They were so- ugh, who can one person be you but a completely different person from you! Naruto's brain hurt. Hell, he's been having a constant headache since the kids arrived. Not that he wasn't happy that they were there! No, Naruto loved it! Takashi had a calming effect of Boruto with a dry wit to knock him down a few. While Benihime had taken one look at Himawari and declared that they would be best friends for life and that Hima was an absolute cinnamon roll! (Beni's words, not his…)

Naruto hadn't spent that much time with Mira (Well, Shikamira, now) or Motoko. But just seeing the girls with the Nara men told Naruto how much they had helped them. Shikadai didn't seem as lonely, with Shikamira teasing him and giving him a challenge. While Motoko had latched onto Shikamaru and refused to see him unhappy.

Speaking of Shikamaru… Fuck, it was awkward now and even though Naruto was a little annoyed that the kids didn't tell him the whole truth at the beginning, he was eternally grateful that they didn't. Even if it was blatantly obvious just how Nara Takashi was. Or how Mira was always smiling. Or how all of the kids looked related. Man, being Hokage was making him lose his edge…

Honestly, he hasn't even talked to Shikamaru since the arrival of their counterparts and it need to be done soon, no matter how much Kiba teased him about actually being Shikamaru's bitch (by the way, fuck off, Kiba!) Yet, the fact that there was another Naruto out there was mindboggling, even if she was a woman. And a very pretty, very smart, happily married woman with four children who didn't seem to have any problems with her being Hokage. Did he mention that her husband was his best friend and advisor?!

This is it, his breaking point. His luck has run out. Goodbye, Hinata. Kisses the kids for him.

 ** _You're overreacting again._** Kurama said as Naruto watched the kids train. The women had gone to the kitchen to prepare lunch, his counterpart included. That had caused an uproar of 'YOU CAN COOK?!' from everyone. His counterpart huffed, turned to her husband and said, 'Why do people think that I can't cook?' rhetorically. To which her husband, sounding exactly like Naruto's advisor, replied, 'Because you used to live off of ramen before Mom taught you how to cook.'

 _Meet a female version of yourself, then tell me how you would react._ Naruto grumbled to the tailed beast, making Kurama snort.

 ** _Come now, Naruto. Think of it this way, she could have been married to the Uchiha._** That comment caused a shiver down both of their spines. Holy hell, that would be worse!

 _Thank God for small miracles._ Naruto joked before getting serious. _She actually knows about our clan though… All because she was a chunin…_

 ** _Well, farting in an enemy's will not get you a promotion._**

 _Shut up! I know that! Whatever, I just have a shit ton of questions for her now._

 ** _The woman's too much like you. She's honest and will tell you the truth. You just have to ask her._** Kurama prompted.

Naruto wanted to pull his counterpart to the side because these questions were killing him. Like, how did they win the war if they didn't fight Kaguya? How do they know about the Otsutsuki? Why is Shikamaru her husband and why were all of her kids so well-behaved?! (Clearly, the last question was the most important.) But his counterpart was in the kitchen and there was no way in hell he was going in there! _Never again!_

A hand clapped down on his shoulder but Naruto didn't jump. Kakashi had been kind enough to release the tiniest bit of chakra, giving Naruto some warning before the older man approached him. Never more than now had Naruto been so grateful that his sensei never changed, even after retirement. Kakashi (and Iruka, to an extent) was his only father figure left. Moments like these reminded Naruto just how much he needed him.

"How are you doing?" The elder man kept his voice low as his eyes drifted out the window. Naruto shrugged.

"Alright, I guess. It's just- have I done something wrong?" He asked softly, his eyes lowering to where his son was being given instructions on the basic kata of Breakers by Takashi.

"Like what?" Kakashi asked. Naruto knew what Kakashi was doing. He was making Naruto confess out his thoughts and feelings, even though he _really_ didn't want to.

"She has everything all set. She's strong, she knows about the Uzumaki, she's juggling being Hokage and a mother just fine. Her kids don't hate her-"

"Are you jealous?" Kakashi wasn't teasing him, Naruto could tell that by his serious tone.

"How can I not be?" He sighed, feeling more depressed. Kakashi squeezed his shoulder before letting go, crossing his arms.

"I don't believe it's just her. I think it has a lot to do with Shikamaru." Naruto looked back at his sensei. "I love Hinata and she is a good wife to you and a great mother to your kids. But you've always shouldered too much, Naruto, and Hinata doesn't want to hurt you by telling you to take a break or let her shouldered some of your burden. The village won't hate you if you go home for dinner or skip to train with your son."

"And them?" Naruto whispered, letting Kakashi's serious words sink in.

"From what I've observed, they've worked to achieve the balance that they have between their work and their family. And clearly, they talk a lot to each other and their kids. I'm grateful that their kids fell into our world." Naruto snapped his head back over to the masked man, who shrugged.

"They got you out of that office. You should talk to her when you have the chance, Naruto. I think you can learn a lot from yourself." Kakashi walked away, and Naruto continued to stare out the window, his daughter smiling as Benihime waved her arms and danced around Mirai. _Yeah, maybe I should._

The rest of the men were, honestly, they were lounging around and doing their absolute best not to make it obvious that they were staring at Commander Nara, who had light another cigarette. They were failing miserably at it.

"You know, if you take a picture, it lasts longer." Not Shika drawled, tapping his cigarette against the ashtray as he turned to stare down the men. "If you want answers, ask questions. I reserve the right to not answer them though."

"How good is Washboard in bed?"

Thunk, thunk.

"Next question." Not Shika deadpanned as everyone sweat-dropped at the sight of Sai pinned to the wall with trench knives aimed at some _very important_ bits.

"How do you have those anyway?" Choji was brave enough to ask as Not Shika retrieved his weapons. "Shikamaru gave them to Mirai when she became a chunin."

"Oh, I did too. These knives were my birthday gift from Naruto." He had one to Choji and Shikamaru to inspect. Kakashi stood and leaned over their shoulders as the other Nara explained,

"Before Asuma-Sensei passed away, we had been training on making my taijutsu more offensive. Turns out, I prefer trench knives over kunai. Most shinobi aren't used to them, making it easier to overwhelm an enemy. Asuma-Sensei was going to commission me a set after the mission but…" Not Shika trailed off, his face turning darker.

"They're engraved." Kakashi stated, lifting one into the light. Not Shika nodded.

"Naruto was helping Kurenai-Sensei with the dishes one day when Kurenai-Sensei brought up that I was supposed to get them. So, she decided to go the smith that made her fans and had them made with the same metal and kanji engraving. It makes performing jutsus much easier." He explained, taking back the knife.

"That's very- thoughtful actually." What the hell was that supposed to mean, Kiba?!

"Of course, it is, Naruto never thinks of herself."

"I knew about Kurenai-Sensei being pregnant?" Naruto found himself asking, vividly remembering that day when Shikamaru had dragged him to the hospital to get him out of that funk after Pervy-Sage's death. Not Shika raised an eyebrow before shaking his head with a laugh.

"Right, different world. Well, Asuma-Sensei liked to play matchmaker so Naruto normally spent most of her time with Team 10, especially after our promotion. She was actually the first one to pick up that Kurenai-Sensei could be pregnant. Something about her glowing. Anyway, after the mission, we all pitched in to help Kurenai-Sensei, including Naruto. She dragged Sai with her whenever she did, so that her and Kurenai-Sensei could get Ino to start dating him. You're welcome, by the way."

"Just how much time did you two spend together?" Sasuke asked suspiciously.

"You're going to go into protective-brother-mode with me?" Not Shika snorted. "Huh, guess you aren't that different from Sasuke back at home."

"Answer the question."

"Well, seeing as we were living together at that time, I'd say we spent a lot of time together."

…

"You would've both been fifteen." Shikamaru calculated, jaw dropped as everyone started at Not Shika, absolutely stunned.

"Yep." How is he so calm?!

"How youthful?" Lee nearly asked, unsure how to register the news. Not Shika shrugged.

"I don't know why you guys are so shocked. Naruto and I have known each other since we were eight. If you ask Ino, she'll tell you guys that we've been dating since we were eleven."

"Eleven?" Naruto yelped, his eyes turning to the kitchen where he could see the very curvy and busty (but not too busty) female version of him waving a whisk in the air as she skipped around his laughing wife.

"According to Ino, anyway. Man, you guys are worse than when Naruto has the girls over for their tea/gossip night." Not Shika rolled his eyes at them. "Anymore questions about my love life or do you want to know something else?"

"How long have you guys been married?" Kakashi asked, his eyes narrow as they locked on the wedding band on his left ring finger.

"Eighteen years."

Naruto nearly collapsed back into his chair as he choked on air. His other self had been married since she was sixteen?! Nope, Naruto couldn't even look over at his (and not in that way!) Shikamaru without the need to die in embarrassment. But if Kakashi, Sai, and Sasuke's reactions were anything to go by then-

"Holy shit, man, you've either got balls or you're whipped." Kiba commented, shaking his head. "Eighteen years, dude, we were fighting a war, not getting hitched!"

"We fought a war too." Not Shika confirmed. "We decided to have Dad and Tsunade do a civil service the day before Naruto was sent off to train with Killer Bee. Only Mom, Dad, Tsunade and Kakashi knew. We had an actual big wedding a year after the war. Now that was a party." Fuck, that made her fifteen, instead of sixteen! Not Shika must have noticed that everyone was still dumbfounded because then he commented,

"It's not that uncommon. And it's not like we were the first ones to kids."

"You weren't?" Choji asked, regaining some sense.

"Nope, we were second."

"That doesn't make me feel better. Screw this, I need sake. Where-" Naruto started when two voices interrupted at the same time.

"Third cabinet on the left in the office." Both Shikamaru's locked glances before this world's Shikamaru groaned, putting his head in his hands.

"Naruto, bring the whole stash."

Sake, must find sake. Ah ha, there it is! Holy shit, there were at least eight bottles in the cabinet alone. Scratch that, make that nine bottles. Struggling, Naruto carefully brought the stash back into the living room where Not Shika was still getting asked questions. But as Naruto was passing out the sake, Takashi rushed over to the window, pulling it open.

"Dad! Mira can't get Dai out of the shadows!"

Not Shika and Shikamaru scrambled to the window, sprinting out of it in a hurry to get to the large black circle in the backyard. When Naruto arrived to the scene, the kids were watching as Shikamira pulled tug of war with some shadows over Shikadai.

"Let. Him. Go!" Half of her body was kneeling on the dirt, bent at the waist as her upper body leaned over into the shadows. Shikamira was gripping an unconscious Shikadai underneath his armpits, her arms wrapped around his torso as tendrils of shadows wrapped themselves around his legs, trying to draw the boy back in. Shikamira's own shadow was trying to bat the tendrils away.

"Shikamira, keep pulling. Nara, help me by keeping the circle open! Hurry!" Commander Nara ordered as he knelt to, gripping the edge of the shadows and widening the opening. Dazed, Shikamaru did the same, not believing that he could actually do that.

"No, he's not yours! Let him go, you old hag!" Shikamira growled as she glared into the darkness. Naruto followed her line of sight to find an almost invisible woman, robbed in the shadows with a golden glint in her eyes, like this was all going to plan. Suddenly, she disappeared as the tendrils retracted. Shikamira, unprepared for the action, was flown backwards, taking Shikadai with her. The shadow hole closed up, making the Nara men jump back. That was the scene that everyone else arrived to.

"Ugh, wait! I got him!" The blue-eyed girl regained her senses as she gently moved Shikadai off of her. Wait, he wasn't unconscious, he was-

"Mediating?!" Not Shika commented before he gave his daughter a sideways glance. "Shikamira-"

"Ok, I get it, really bad idea!" Shikamira confessed. "But I couldn't teach him anything besides this. And you did this and was fine. Come on, Dai! Wake up!" She was shaking his shoulders now, getting more distraught as the boy refused to wake.

As Shikamaru and Temari moved closer, Naruto and Kakashi were pulled to the side by his female self. She was shaking her head in disbelief. Her husband approached them as she started talking,

"Shikamira's right, that shouldn't have happened. We've brought Motoko down there to mediate and she's been perfectly safe. There's something fishy going on here."

"Like what?" Naruto asked. Not Shika answered this time.

"Shikadai must have been more awaken than we had originally calculated. Something or someone wanted Shikadai to be awaken."

"Your clan's founder?" Kakashi asked, earning a head shake.

"No, while she was there, this isn't her normal strategy. Though perhaps- Lord Seventh, has my copycat ever been under genjutsu for a long period of time?"

"Does Infinite Tsukuyomi count?" Naruto joked, but then they nodded and Not Shika cursed.

"Shit, he was most likely on the edge of being awakened too but you," he pointed at Naruto, "must have stopped the awakening before it was finished." Not Shika concluded. "This is her payback. She forced Shikadai to be awakened as payback."

"Why though?" Kakashi asked. "And how does being trapped in genjutsu cause this 'awakening'?"

"The Nara records said that the few heads that became awakened had to completely bathe themselves in yin chakra. Which translate to using a powerful genjutsu and fighting against it or absorbing it. Or at least, that's what we believe those old scrolls say." Naruto's girl self explained.

"Her normal reasoning was that it was necessary. It was necessary for me to be awakened before I went to war so that we would win. It was necessary for Shikamira to be born already awakened and I wouldn't be surprised if it was so that the kids would come here." Not Shika's declaration raised a few eyebrows.

"Eh? Are you overthinking again?" His wife asked, not believing him.

"No, think about it, Naruto. You said it yourself. Just because the entire clan uses shadows don't mean every Nara could bridge those seals together. Only Shikamira and I could. And what was the result? The kids traveled to a dimension that is a shadow of their dimension. They even have their own shadow counterparts. There's too many coincidences here." Not Shika explained. All of this talk about shadow dimensions was making Naruto's head hurt.

"This is making my head hurt, Shikamaru." Oh, good, Naruto and his counterpart weren't too different. "Are you suggesting that your dead founder awakened your yin so that you would sire an awakened daughter who would end up meeting her shadow self solely to awaken the shadow self's yin? That's sounds-"

"Ludicrous, yes, but Shika Nara told me that she was waiting for me when I met her. I wouldn't be surprised if she planned all of this." Not Shika insisted.

"Great, first it's aliens, now we have to deal with the dead too." Naruto grumbled. "This is getting better and better. Thanks guys."

"Well, since Shikadai is awake, I'm off to go ground our daughter again." Not Shika told his wife before waving Kakashi over. "Kakashi, Benihime tells me that you bought her ramen." Kakashi caught on to what the commander was doing because he continued the conversation, leaving the two Seventh Hokages alone.

"Real subtle, honey." His girl self muttered before turning to him, raising a looped arm to him. "Want to go for a walk?"

Naruto looked back to the chaos that they had turned away from. Shikamira was bowing and apologizing profusely to Shikamaru and Temari. Sakura and Sasuke still weren't talking to each other. Hinata remembered that they had left the food on the stove, which caused the rest of the women to stampede back to the kitchen.

"Yeah, I could use a walk." And looped his fake arm through hers.

"This is would've been the field that Shikamaru and I went to when we wanted to hide from Yoshino." Uzumaki (it was easier just to call his girl self that) confessed when they arrived to an open field in the Nara forest.

"Should we even be here?" Naruto asked her, remembering how Shikamaru warned everyone about how protective the deer were of the forest. She waved him off.

"Oh, we're fine. We're nowhere near the heart of the forest. Besides, the stags like me. Sit down. Let's talk." Uzumaki urged, lowering herself down to the grass. He followed silently, leaning back on his elbows.

"So, how much did you guys get out of Shikamaru while I was in the kitchen?" Uzumaki teased, making him snort.

"You heard us?"

"It was hard not to. Don't worry about it. The girls were grilling me too." She laughed before her features grimed. "I'm sorry for bring my world's drama into your world." But Naruto shook his head.

"Don't be. How could you know that Sarada would be the one there?"

"True, but it doesn't make me any less guilty."

"I'm sorry you never met Mom." Naruto replied back. She tensed and drew her knees to her. "You're a lot like her." She gave him a watery smile.

"Thanks." She wiped her eyes before grumbling, "Stupid hormones, making me cry at everything."

"How do you do it?" Naruto asked, blurting out the question he's been begging to ask her. She looked over at him. "Being Hokage while keeping your family so together and happy."

"You aren't happy?" She questioned, making him shake his head.

"No, I am. It's just, Boruto's always hated the fact that I was Hokage. Hinata never tells me if she's upset and Himawari just like her mother, just slightly more passive aggressive." Naruto didn't understand why he was spilling his guts out to her but it felt good talking to someone who understood you. Even if it was yourself.

"And I'm trying! I'm really trying to stay on task. To be a good Hokage while being a good husband and father. To be home, on time for dinner. But it's always 'Lord Hokage this' and 'Lord Hokage that'. I feel like I have to chose between my family and my dream and I don't know what to do."

 ** _Tells us how you really feel._** Piss off, Kurama. But Uzumaki nodded, completely understanding what he was talking about. She laid back on the grass next to him, her eyes lifted to the sky.

"I was pregnant with Motoko for the first nine months of my reign as Hokage." She confessed, making Naruto sit up to stare at her. She laughed.

"Yeah, ok, Shikamaru and I celebrated a little too much. Oh, stop blushing. Fine, I'll continue with my point. Anyway, Shikamira, Takashi and Benihime were also upset that I wasn't at home anymore and that there was going to be another baby in the house. They were used to Shikamaru being the Jonin Commander but Mommy not being home, forget it. The first six months were rough. I had councilmen left and right tell me to step down because I was pregnant while my twins decided to go on a pranking spree that made my ANBU cry. All the while, my kids decided to play mute, avoiding me as much as possible. They thought that I had abandon them." She paused, playing with some grass.

"Shikamaru had brought me lunch one day and I had a complete break-down. An awful concoction of stress, hormones, and separation anxiety from my kids. I'll admit, it wasn't one of my finest moments. So, he got Kakashi to fill in for me and picked the kids up from school and Yoshino's. We sat down, talked and cried. The kids aired out their grievances while I really explained to them what being the Hokage entailed. Benihime was a little young, but the twins understood. The end result was making a list of promises, only to be broken under the direst of circumstances."

"What are they? The promises?" Naruto asked, gaining a soft smile from Uzumaki.

"First, Mommy and Daddy must be home by five o'clock."

"I thought the kids were just mad at you?"

"Oh, the kids were also upset at Shikamaru but like I said, me not being home was the real kicker. The kids missed us, badly. They wanted to spend time with us and wanted to tell us about their day at dinner. So, unless we absolutely have to be there and a clone can't take our place, we had to be home at five o'clock."

"Second, we always have dinner together, unless we absolutely have to be away. Motoko was actually very upset when Takashi first C-Rank made him miss dinner until we explained to her why he had to miss dinner." Uzumaki kept talking and Naruto soaked it all in.

"Third, if a clone can do the paperwork, have a clone do it. Even with the new technology, the level of paperwork was too much for me to handle. So, Shikamaru figured out that if I had a few clones that reviewed the paperwork before it got to me, the really important stuff would go to me while the clones handled the rest. That way, I was on time and I got work done faster. Most of the time, unless I'm in meetings all day, I can watch the girls in the afternoon until the twins get home from their missions."

"Fourth, no one goes to bed angry and you always say I love you to everyone before you leave for a mission. Those are no brainers but you'd be surprise how much that helped the kids."

"Fifth, Saturday is family training day. Being pregnant, I couldn't train with the kids as much as I could before but they still wanted me there, even if it was to just to point out their mistakes. Now, there are more promises but I think you get the gist of it." She finished, looking back at him.

"I wish I had a pen." He sighed, making her reach over to pat him.

"Hey, just because that's what my family does doesn't mean it'll work for you guys. But, I do think talking with your family is a good idea. Especially Boruto and Hinata." He blinked at her mention of his wife.

"Hinata?" She nodded slowly.

"She misses you and is worried that you're losing yourself in your job."

"And she told you this?"

"No, but it was pretty obvious, Me." She chuckled as he blushed, looking away.

"You must think I'm awful."

"I think you're human and a troublesome man whose afraid to be alone again." She grabbed his hand. "Trust me, I know." She smiled at him and he smiled back. A few moments passed, a comfortable silence eclipsing them.

"You defeated Kaguya."

"And I'm guessing you defeated Madara and Zetsu." Naruto replied back, making his counterpart shake her head sadly.

"Guy-Sensei defeated Madara, he was the real hero. Sasuke and I delivered the final blow and I was able to reserve the reanimation while getting all of the Tailed-Beasts out. Shikamaru had to bring Zetsu into the shadows and kill him there. Apparently, Nara shadows makes yin creatures mortal." Her sad eyes told Naruto the real story.

"Guy-Sensei didn't make it?" He asked anyway, needing the confirmation. She nodded.

"Lee was devastated and I've never seen Kakashi more distraught in my life. Kakashi had lost nearly everyone and Guy-Sensei was the only person he had left to share memories with, his best friend. And Lee, god, I was in the office the day Kakashi had founded Guy-Sensei's will. Everything he owed, went to Lee, the son he loved more than anything in the world but never had the strength to tell him in person. Kakashi commissioned a statue of Guy-Sensei to be erected at the Academy, so that he would never be forgotten and so that the students knew what a really shinobi looked like." She finished, her words softer now. "He's still alive?"

"Yes, but his career is over. Nothing Granny or Sakura could do fixed his leg." She gave him a watery smile though.

"I'm glad but let's agree that this talk doesn't leave this field. My Lee would figure out a way to get over here if he knew that there was a chance that Guy-Sensei was still alive." She held out her hand.

"And mine would breakdown at the news." Naruto agreed, shaking her hand firmly. "Is that why you let Takashi spar with Lee and Metal?"

"Oh, you picked up on that?" She blinked at him before giving him a foxy smile. "Yes, actually. It helps Lee, giving him students to train. He's 'Carrying on the youthful legacy of Guy-Sensei!' He had Metal but training your son is different than training students. So, as long as my son is never returned to me in that jumpsuit, Takashi can train with the Lees as much as he wants. That's also why he's Team 7's sensei too."

"Mira's team?"

"Yep!"

"Interesting pick." Naruto hummed before remembering something. "Wait, Shikamaru took down Zetsu?!"

"He had to. Zetsu couldn't 'merge' with him. Shikamaru could explain it better but the gist of the story is that when Zetsu tried to 'merge' with him, Shikamaru's shadows wouldn't let him. Shikamaru was able to dragged Zetsu down into the shadows." She tapped her finger to her chin as she tried to recount the story.

"Where Shikadai was mediating?"

"Yep, that's it. Those shadows, they're strong. Zetsu couldn't use any ninjutsu or genjutsu, not even the wood release that he stole. Zetsu never truly learned how to fight with taijutsu because it used other peoples' bodies and instincts." Uzumaki explained.

"So, that place made Zetsu mortal for probably the first time in his life." Naruto realized, making the woman nodded. "And Shikamaru killed him."

"Shikamaru wasn't going to give up the chance. Besides, Zetsu had stolen Kurama's yin half and I was dying. Shikamaru did what he thought was right and I wouldn't be here if he didn't." She stood, holding her hand out to help him. They rose and started to head back to the Nara compound.

"Who do you think is stronger, you or me?" Naruto asked. He was shocked by how quick her answer was.

"You, definitely."

"Me?"

"Absolutely. I can sense it. And any man who can take down Kaguya is definitely stronger than me." She confessed with no shame.

"But you know so much!" Naruto found himself protesting. She shook her head in disagreement, her blonde braid swinging in the air.

"Exactly. I relay so much on fuinjutsu that it's become expected. And I'm clingy. My enemies know exactly who they should attack if they really want to hurt me. I've lost my edge. I'll get it back though. After I teach you fuinjutsu." She promised with a smile.

They arrived back to the backyard to find everyone having a picnic. Only Uzumaki's family wasn't eating, making her scolded them half-heartedly to 'start eating already, you don't have to wait for me!' As Naruto sat next to his wife, he couldn't help but notice how Uzumaki leaned against her husband as she ate, laughing at her kids' antics. Naruto smiled before listening in to Boruto's cheerfulness over learning the katas for the Breakers.

That night, Naruto went home with his family. He didn't call a family meeting, because the timing wasn't right. When everything had calmed down, then he'll call the meeting. But that night, he turned to Hinata and they talked. They talked about everything that's happened these four days. They talked about the kids and how they need to spend more time with them. Mostly importantly, they talked about each other and Naruto realized just how much he's been hurting his gentle, too-nice-for-her-own-good wife. Hinata, bless her heart, never complained about how much she missed him. Or how she felt like a single parent most days. Or how incredible stupid it was to send a clone for Himawari's birthday. All because she didn't want to cause him extra stress. Hinata loved him so much that she would suffer for him. It broke his heart and made him realize just how lucky he was. _Never again, I won't cause you this pain, Hinata. That's a promise!_

 **Author's Note - Man, was this chapter hard to write! But, it's done and I really hope you guys like it! Again, send your ideas! I need inspiration, pretty please with a cherry on top! So, review, favorite and follow (P.S. We're almost to a 100 followers! Woah! Love you guys!) I love you guys so much! The next few chapters are going to have action, promise! See you guys soon!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	13. Beware of Matchmakers!

**Author's Note - Hi guys! I'm sorry it took so long to update and I've got some bad news. So, the next few weeks, it's going to be hard to update as often as I would like so I'm going to give you guys a heads up now. On the bright side, I made the executive decision to do give you this chapter, even though it's only got one POV! Also, there's a possibility that I'll do a side story about 2.0 but I want you guys to tell me if you want this or not. Finally, I'm sorry the chapter is shorter than usual and for the ending. You'll see. Alright, that's it! On to the story!**

Chapter 13: Beware of Matchmakers!

 **Meanwhile: In Konoha 2.0**

 _Ino_

"But really?! A cat lady?! Akamaru, back me up here…"

Ino drowned out Kiba's hysterics as they casually leaped across the village's rooftops to deliver the stranded Nara Uzumakis' message. And why the rooftops, you may ask? Because the last time the village saw the Vice-Commander and Head of T&I rushing somewhere, there had been a lot of downed houses… Anyway, like her, Akamaru was laughing at Kiba behind his back as the gigantic dog raced beside them. Normally, Kiba would have been riding on Akamaru's back but clearly, he needed to release his- whatever this was.

Her icy eyes gazed sharply at the tower as they approached it. Her mind was still racing. Sure, she had appeared cool, calm and collected when she appeared before the projection (Ino was a fantastic actress) but still, seeing that other world was plain disturbing. Naruto, as a guy?! Hell, Kakashi and Yamato will be sobbing in horror when they hear about this.

Her counterpart looked a lot like her, which made Ino sigh in relief when she left the compound. Though, Copy's hair was much longer than Ino's, seeing as Ino hasn't let her hair grow past her shoulders since _the incident._ Sai's clone didn't look different at all and Ino would bet her entire life savings that he was just as awkward as her own lovable hubby. Ironically, Team 10 from this new world looked pretty similar to Team 10 here.

Side note, Ino had always thought that Temari would have been a good girl for Shikamaru if he hadn't been completely and totally in love with Naruto since he was eight. Honestly, watching those two together could make anyone believe in true love and marriage.

Ino glanced back at Kiba, who was still babbling. Her eyes shifted down to his wedding band before they turned back to the sky, praying for strength. Right, the new world's Kiba wasn't married to Hinata which could lead to trouble when Kiba finally snaps out of his mid-life crisis.

Then there was the fact that Sakura was there, standing next to Sasuke, who wasn't trying to kill her. Or the fact that that world's Sarada wore the same shade of red that Sakura used to wear, with glasses. Karin's glasses.

Ino was a smart woman. There were times when she could pick up things faster than Shikamaru (Shikamaru was many things, but knowing people and their business was her thing) and all of the points led to the fact that Sarada was actually Sakura's daughter in that world. How Naruto didn't kill Sakura was a miracle. Though, Shikamaru was with her and Naruto hated killing bitchy ex-friends in front of her babies. Something about not wanting to scar them while they were young or something along those lines…

Sakura was still a touchy-subject amongst the Konoha 11, well, it should be 10 now but since Sasuke's returned permanently and Sai's solidified membership into Team 7- Ino was getting off track again but you get the idea. Anyway, the Konoha 11 didn't talk about Sakura. Her actions still stung and Ino could still remember Inner Sakura's distraught image and the memories that followed.

Oh, look, they were at the tower. Naturally, they entered through the window because, to quote Naruto, doors are overrated and Kakashi needs surprises, keeps the old man on his toes. Not that their arrival surprised Kakashi, who didn't even flinch when Akamaru jumped his back to lick him for a treat. Pulled up at his desk in a spare chair was Mirai, helping him organize his (Naruto's) paperwork.

Ino couldn't help the smirk that twitched her lips at the sight of the pair. Shikamaru was going to flip a shit when he finally realizes that Mirai had a huge but extremely well-handled crush on Kakashi, who's what, nearly 25 years older than her. And Mirai, being the smart girl that she was, performed her duties to a tee and never did anything to hint this crush for Kakashi and wouldn't until she was a jonin because yes, Shikamaru's rules applied to Mirai too. In the two years since she became a chunin and got her bodyguard orders, Mirai had become Kakashi's friend and confidant, his closest friend since the death of Guy-Sensei.

Of course, Naruto knew about Mirai's crush and supported it. (I'm telling you, Ino, she's exactly what he needs! She's smart, she doesn't put up with his I-Don't-Deserve-Love bullshit and she makes sure that he takes care of himself! And Mirai is into older men, not teenage boys that laugh at fart jokes!) And Ino, being Naruto's number one partner in crime when it came to making lasting couples in Konoha, their record was amazing, agreed with this match and would be there to laugh when Shikamaru tries to kill Kakashi for trying anything with his most beloved goddaughter.

"Ah, Akamaru. I'm sorry, boy. The pack finished off all of my treats yesterday…" Kakashi trailed off as the large dog munched happily at the treat Mirai tossed him. She shrugged at Kakashi as Akamaru moved to sit at his partner's feet.

"And you wonder why the pack likes me so much." Mirai teased him before waving to Ino and Kiba. "Hey Aunt Ino, Uncle Kiba, what's up? Anything from Uncle and Auntie yet?"

One guess for who Mirai's favorite Aunt and Uncle were. Not that Ino could blame Mirai. Shikamaru was practically the girl's father while Naruto was too Naruto to not love. Hell, they pretty much had shared custody over Mirai with Kurenai, especially when Kurenai started going on missions again.

"I'm married to a cat lady!" Kiba wailed dramatically as Akamaru whimpered mournfully.

"Oh, you poor man…" Really, Kakashi? Don't encourage him. Ino bopped Kiba on the head to shut him up before turning to face the Sixth Hokage.

"Shikamaru's brats fell into a world where Naruto's a guy." Ino decided that being blunt was the best course of action for this situation. The absolutely horrified, pale look on Kakashi's face was so worth it. Also, the ANBU that choked behind her must have been Yamato.

"Aw man, they went world hopping without me." Mirai whined before she waved her hand in front of Kakashi's unresponsive face. "Aunt Ino, you broke him."

Mirai's teasing snapped Kakashi out of his stupor before he banged his head against the desk. The grown man groaned in defeat while Mirai petted his hair like he was a dog.

"There, there."

"Stop, Mirai, I get it." Kakashi raised his masked face back to her and Kiba before sighing. "Anything else I should know about?"

"Naruto said that they should be back in a week or two." Kiba said, still pouting pitifully. Kakashi gave them a deadpanned stare.

"Did they give a reason for why it's going to take them so long to get back?"

"We didn't ask." Ino shrugged as Kakashi face-palmed.

"I'm getting too old for this."

"On the plus side, Mira yelled 3:00 to Sarada so we should be able to get another message from them." Ino supplied cheerfully before sobering. Kiba tensed too as the room felt grim. Lord Sixth's eyes narrowed at their posture.

"What else?"

"Sakura's alive in that world." Ino confessed. The Kage and his guard stiffened as she continued. "From what I could observe, that world's Sarada Uchiha is actually the daughter of Sasuke and Sakura."

"Honestly, I'm surprised the bitch was still standing." Kiba growled, his fangs sparkling dangerously. Kiba had actually been the first one on the scene when that night happened. "Naruto and Shikamaru looked like they were ignoring her even though she was demanding questions about why our Sarada was hurt."

"Sarada saw her?!" Kakashi demanded, the concern laced in his eyes. They nodded grimly. The older man reached for his water, sipping some to collect his thoughts. His gaze bore into them as he passed the empty glass to Mirai, who had fallen silent as the mood continued to darken.

"And Sasuke?"

"Got into full Papa Bear Mode and looked ready to jump through wall for the chance at killing her." Kiba stated. Kakashi stood, leaving the cape on the chair. He opened the window and waved at all of them.

"Come on. We should make sure Sasuke hasn't destroyed the Nara forest. The last thing I need is to have Naruto on my ass again for not watching Sasuke's emotions."

Thankfully, the Nara forest and Shikamaru's house was still standing when they arrived. The same could not be said about Naruto's underground training room. Sasuke was still in a pissy mood, his sharingan swirling as he sparred his anger out with Lee and Sai. Ink was everywhere and the floor was ruined.

"You know, Naruto's going to kill you when she gets back to find her training field trashed." Kakashi witted as he entered the fray. Sasuke just huffed.

"Hn."

"No, you break it, you pay for it." How was it that all of Team 7 was fluent in Uchihaniese? Even Sai was fluent, which was saying something.

"Washboard will be most unpleased." Ino's hubby agreed before he stepped towards her. "Beautiful."

"Hubby. Where's our son?"

"I believe the children are on Keep-Sarada-Happy duty."

"Yes! My most youthful son and his friends will ensure that Sarada's youthful spirits will be returned to her!" Lee interjected, jumping over the huffy Sasuke to speak with her and Kiba. Mirai looked towards Kakashi, her red eyes locking with his. He nodded and she disappeared, up to join the others with the Sarada support group.

"Hn."

"I'm sure Naruto and the kids will be fine. I'm more worried about the fact that there's two Narutos now. Shikamaru will be there to rein them in if they cause too much trouble." Kakashi comforted before getting into a fitting stance. Sasuke fell into one as well. And that was Ino's que to get the hell out of there.

Naruto's kitchen was where the kids were having their cheering up session. Poor Sarada did look paler than usual, if that was even possible. Ryuji was there too, pouring some tea for everyone. Inojin looked up at her as she entered, Sai, Kiba, Lee and Akamaru trailing in behind her.

"Mom, Sarada's back hurts again."

"Inojin!" Sarada hissed, her cheeks reddening. "I'm fine."

"No can do. Taka's not here so I'm on Sarada-Back-Watching duty in your boyfriend's stead."

"He's not-"

"Sarada, let Ino look at you." Ryuji said through his chuckling as he poured more tea. How he did it without spilling, Ino will never know. And no, Sai, she was not jealous! Whatever. Carefully, Ino placed a glowing green hand on Sarada's back. Par norm, her top half was fine. As she moved her hand lower, Ino scanned more closely. Eh, not too bad, but still…

"Alright, everything is fine as long as you don't push yourself. Lee, light training for the rest of this week and absolutely no sparing with Metal." Ino ordered. Instantly, the father and son duo fell into tears of guilt.

"OH, MY MOST BELOVED STUDENT! FORGIVE YOUR POOR SENSEI FOR HIS UNWATCHFUL EYES!"

"FORGIVE ME, SARADA, FOR MY UNYOUTHFUL SPARING TODAY!" Gods, why did they let Lee have a kid again? Ah, right, to give Lee someone to carry on Guy-Sensei's legacy.

"Sensei, Metal, it's ok! I'm fine!" Sarada insisted.

"And will you pip down. My ears hurt." Kenji grumbled, rubbing his sensitive ears before Kiba smacked him. "Ow! Dad!"

"Respect your sensei, brat." Kiba kidded before scratching Hyorinmaru's puppy ears. "Where's your mom?"

"Waiting for Ichiro at the west gate. He should be back soon." Kenji answered. Kiba made an 'oh' face.

"Oh yeah, he was due make today. Well, Kakashi can collect his briefing here then." Kiba said before slouching back into the chair. "Chocho, pass the food over here."

As the others ate, Ino moved to stand by her husband and leaned down to whisper,

"Is Choji in the office?" Sai nodded and she gave him back a soft smile. "I'll be back. Call me if Shikamaru and Naruto message again." He gave her one of his genuine smiles, something she taught him, before quickly kissing her cheek. As she left the kitchen, her son complaining about PDA parents, Ino couldn't be prouder of how far Sai had come when it came to his emotions.

Contrary to popular belief, Naruto had an amazing sense of style and her house reflected that. Sure, the woman loved the color orange and could pull it off somehow, but Naruto wasn't going to subject her family to it. The walls were either blue-grays or green-gray, giving the house a cool and calm vibe. While some of the rooms were still very traditional, most were relaxed, with clean, modern finishes and furniture. As Ino pushed the door open to enter Shikamaru's office, she was taken back once again by the plethora of books that greeted her. Only the window behind Shikamaru's desk was free from books. Books about the Naras' medical findings, different herbs and poisons books, Naruto's fuinjutsu scrolls, basic chakra control novel, and so much more filled the office, given the room the feel of a library.

Choji sat in Shikamaru's well-loved and grand chair, craved out of Nara wood with delicate details. Karui sat next to him, her vibrant red hair shielding her golden eyes as leaned over to read a report. Choji glanced up at her and smiled, waving her in. As Ino approached the desk, her eyes caught the pictures that Shikamaru kept there.

There was Team 10's picture from their first day as a team, Asuma-Sensei smiling proudly with a cigarette hanging from his lips while the then genins coughed through the smoke. Oh, the irony, Ino couldn't help the sad smirk that morphed on her lips before she looked at the next pictures. There was a picture of Shikamaru and Naruto, the day they got their vests with Uncle Shikaku and Aunt Yoshino smiling behind them with pride. Next was a rather recent picture of all of Shikamaru's kids, even Mirai with in the picture. Mirai had Beni and Motoko slung up onto her hips while Mira and Taka crouched down in front of them, wearing their own, new chunin vests with pride. They were all smiling at the camera, looking like the happy, dysfunctional family that they were. The last picture was of just him and Naruto, on their wedding day. When they had the big party and traditional ceremony.

It was the picture that had been snapped right after the ceremony, because Naruto was still in her elegant, white kimono. Ino could remember the disbelief that Sakura had when she learned that Naruto wanted a traditional wedding, which proved just how little Sakura knew about Naruto. After years of isolation and hatred, it should have been obvious to anyone with a brain that Naruto would have wanted a fairytale wedding, if only to say fuck you to everyone who said that it would never happen. And Shikamaru was more than happy to give her whatever she wanted, because Naruto didn't ask for much so when she did ask for something, she got it, no questions asked. Though, Naruto did forgo the headpiece for a more modern up-do, having complained about how heavy the damn thing was. _Which it was…_

Naruto's shiromuku kimono was skillfully crafted by the ladies of the Nara clan for the wedding of their heir to the Shinobi World's savior. Naturally, no small detail was overlooked. The picture on the desk was taken at the perfect angle, so that the beaded stitching of deer and foxes sprinting through the forest on Naruto's haori sparkled in the sunlight. Shikamaru, in a homage to his late father, wore the same black and navy hakama that Uncle Shikaku wore when he married Aunt Yoshino.

Naruto and Shikamaru were kissing in the picture. Her arms were thrown tightly around his neck as his were like a vice-grip on her waist. If memory serves, Naruto had jumped Shikamaru when they had gone outside after the ceremony and Hinata caught the picture at the right moment. It was just so- them, really. But then again, they've always been together and the idea of them not being together was as terrifying as it was downright weird.

Huh, how is that other Konoha 11 going to handle it when the couple does their flirting? Man, are they going to be scarred for life.

"You're back." Choji said, leaning back against the chair. "Anything new?"

"Shikamaru's going to have to replace Naruto's training field again."

"Seriously?" Choji laughed, his deep voice booming. "I don't know who's going to be madder, Naruto because the field's been trashed or Shikamaru because he's got to fix it." Three, two, one-

"Shikamaru." The teammates agreed with a laugh. Karui rolled her eyes at them before standing. But even she had a small smile on her lips.

"I'll get us some food." As the immigrant left the office, Choji's eyes trailed down to his wife's derriere. Ino rolled her eyes at him.

"Really, Choji?"

"Hey! Shikamaru does it all the time with Naruto!"

"They do it to each other in front of anybody. They've desensitized everyone." Ino countered. "How they don't have more kids is beyond me. Whatever, we should be expecting another message from them soon." Choji raised an eyebrow.

"Mira called out to Sarada to set a time. Bet you the last potato chip that it was so that Team 7 and 10 can meet themselves." Ino teased as the large man tensed dramatically.

"Never!"

"Calm down, I'm messing with you. But seriously," her lighthearted tone dropped, "we've got to be careful now. This other world is so similar but so different from ours that we have to keep our drama to ourselves." Ino explained. Choji nodded in agreement.

"They've already dealt with the Uchiha drama. We'd probably kill them if we reveal the Hyuga drama to them. When's Ichiro supposed to be back?"

"Today, Hinata's meeting him at the gate to explain the situation to him." Ino supplied before sighing, "And the Sand Ambassador will be here soon…"

"How is that important?" Choji asked, his eyes narrowing. Ino paled slightly as she waved her hands.

"Oh, nothing! Just thinking out loud again!" _Shit, can't have Choji telling Shikamaru that Mira has an admirer! That'll ruin Naruto and I's perfect matchmaking!_

Time passed and soon it was 3:00. Team 7 and 10 NexGen, as they like to call themselves, waited with excitement in the living room. Ino watched from the sidelines with the other adults. They wanted to give the kids some time before they got down to business. Mirai was with the adults, almost bouncing in anticipation at seeing a new world.

"Man, what's taking so long?!" Chocho whined as she looked back at the clock. The message was running late. "I bet I'm as beautiful there as I am here."

"And modest too." Smack! One day, Inojin's sarcasm is going to kill him…

"Yosh! I will finally meet another genin with as much youth as myself!" Metal Lee was crying tears of joy, making Sarada sweat-drop.

"Lee, you're meeting yourself…"

"I know, my most youthful friend! Isn't it beautiful?!" No, it was terrifying. Two Lees and two Metals… oh the horror…

"Sh!" Kenji hushed as the wall morphed into a staticky screen. Sasuke was whispering into Ryuji's ear, explaining the details to the blind man as the screen cleared.

"Eternal Rival!" Metal cried as Taka appeared on screen, a blonde boy looking eerily like Naruto with whiskers standing behind him.

"Hey Lee, what's up?" Taka waved lazily before slouching back. "Is our house still standing?"

"Of course, it is!" Chocho huffed, crossing her arms. "Now, where's the other us?! Just imagine it, another sexy Chocho!"

"Oh the horror." Taka smirked before him and the other boy was pushed off screen by the other Chocho. The two girls blinked at each other.

"This is so weird." Karui whispered to her husband as the girls pointed to each other, screaming.

"I'M SO PRETTY!"

"Tell me your secret!"

"No, tell me yours!"

"You first!

"No, you!" Luckily, Taka reentered the screen, glaring down the other Chocho.

"Troublesome teammates." Taka groaned as he shoved Other Chocho back off screen. "Wait your turn. Ok, guys, step forward."

Ino watched with interested as she took in the other Uzumaki boy stepped into screen with a boy that look just like genin Shikamaru and a little girl with Naruto's whisker and Hinata's hair. No way-

"Alright, guys, this is Boruto Uzumaki." Taka pointed to the whiskered boy. _Wait, a screw?! Who names their kid after a screw?_ "His little sister, Himawari Uzumaki." The blue-haired girl waved happily that them, looking so much like Beni in that moment. "And Shikadai Nara." Taka pointed next to Mini-Shikamaru.

Ino blinked. Wow, Shikadai and Taka should really be the twins…

"They've official been adopted into the Nara Uzumaki fam!" Mira's voice rang out but she stayed out of sight. "Guys, this is Team 7 and 10 NexGen! You've already met Sarada and you can figure out who Chocho and Bastard are so the guy with the tattoos is Kenji and his nin-dog, Hyorinmaru! Says hi, Kenji!"

"Um, why does the girl look like Mom?" Kenji asked shakily, pointing a nervous finger at Himawari.

"Kenji!" Beni hopped onto the screen, pulling Himawari into a hug as she exclaimed. "Hima's mommy is Aunt Hinata! That makes us sisters! Isn't that cool?!"

"What?!" Kenji looked from the girls to Boruto, then back at the girls. "No, that isn't cool! That means I'm more related to Mira than ever! Help me, Sarada! I'm dying!" As you can see, Kiba's dramatics are hereditary. Everyone sweat-dropped, even Hyorinmaru.

"Get off!" Sarada pushed him off of her lap before looking back at the screen. "Ignore him. It's nice to meet you guys, I guess." She seemed to tense under Shikadai's calculating eyes before the boy looked off screen.

"Oi, Mira, didn't you have something important to tell them?"

"Oh, yeah! Guys, is Uncle Kakashi there? Mom's got a message!" Mira called. Kakashi walked until he was in view. But before he could speak, Beni started to ramble.

"Uncle Kakashi! I met the other you and Mirai! And they got me ramen and ice cream! And you actually paid! And I got to ride on your shoulder! And-"

"Hello, Beni. Tell me all about it when you get home."

"Kay!"

"Now, the message?"

"Right." Taka shifted to shinobi professionalism. "The Lady Hokage will be staying here with the Jonin Commander in order to take down a rogue Otsutsuki who mission is to capture an awakened Nara child and Boruto Uzumaki. This Otsutsuki is looking for new chakra and new Kekkei Genkai. It shouldn't take more than a week but she wanted us to inform you of the situation."

"I see. And she couldn't tell me this because?"

"Well-"

A hand came down on Taka's shoulder as a man stepped into view. Ino felt her breath hitch as she took in the man before her. Early, she had just seen a glance of him, unable to take in any details. Now though, she could see the undeniable similarities between the tall, blonde man and her hokage. The eyes, the whiskers, the blinding smile, the obsession with orange. Yes, the man was Naruto Uzumaki.

"Fuck, it's true. You two fell into a world where your mother's a man." Kakashi stated slowly, the shock and horror over taking his features. Takashi gave him a smirk.

"Surprise!"

"I swear, you two will be the death of me." Kakashi grumbled as Male Naruto waved to Kakashi.

"I guess we know one thing for certain. Kakashi-Sensei never changes." He joked before becoming serious. "Your Hokage and her family will be returned back to you safe and sound. I promise."

An understanding passed between the men, before Male Naruto nodded and left the screen.

"Anyway, Uncle Kakashi, Mom's getting ready-" Taka started.

Then there was a crash, as if a plate was shattering. Everyone jumped as a shaky, feminine voice asked,

"Neji?"

Multiple things happened in those few seconds. First, the signal was cut and the screen returned back to normal. Second, the room swiveled around to towards the back entrance where Hinata stood tensed, completely in view of the screen before them. Third, Ichiro blinked at them, before facing Hinata and asking,

"Mother, why was the other you crying?"

 **Author's Note - Ok, so if it wasn't obvious enough, yes, Ichiro is Neji's son. Now, is Hinata Ichiro's biological mother? Eh, who knows because I haven't even decided on that yet so you know what, I'm letting you guys pick. (But, let us all remember that this is a fictional story and that incest in real life is** **bad** **. Get it, got it, good!) And how does Kiba fit into all of this? I actually have that planned out but that's for later! And yes, we'll head back to 1.0 and back to the main plot! I have so many ideas, mah ha ha! Rice Otsutsuki is going down and the kids will be kicking ass and taking names! Ok, so review, favorite and follow! I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	14. The Hag, The Fox, and The Psycho

**Author's Note - (Tries to sneak in quietly, dodges two chairs and a desk!) Hi guys! Please don't kill me!... Ok, it's safe. Well, I owe you guys a huge apology. I'm so sorry, guys! Life happens and writing needed to take a backseat. But I'm back and man, do I have a fantastic chapter for you guys! With three POV's (I wanted to make up for last chapter). This chapter picks up right where we left off and yes, there's, you guessed it, action! I hope you guys like it! On to the story!**

Chapter 14: The Hag, The Fox, and The Psycho

 _Boruto_

They say that curiosity killed the cat. So, it was probably a good thing that Boruto's a shinobi. And yeah, a lot of his questions were stupid but can you blame him? Dad had a girl version of himself! Who was apparently _very happily_ (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) married to Uncle Shikamaru. Thus, questions needed to be answered.

Questions like, Dad Mom, can you make that tempura again that you made for lunch? Or, Dad Mom, where did you learn sealing and can you teach me?! Or, Dad, does this mean you and Uncle Shikamaru after actually having an affair? (Naturally, that got Boruto a smack on the head and a deadpanned look from his father but it was _so_ worth it.) Dad Mom didn't mind his blabbering though, given how she was probably used to Beni doing it. She happily answered his questions before being dragged away with Boruto's mom by Hima and Beni for 'important girly stuff that needs both Mommies!'

Final verdict, Dad Mom was cool and could stay. Especially if she continued making that tempura. Umm, tempura…

Right, sorry, got off track again. Boruto shook his head before glancing over at Mira and Taka, who he had to admit, were way more relaxed since the arrival of their parents.

Also, how the hell did no one notice how much they look alike?! A shiver went down Boruto's spine when he thought back to when he checked Mira out. No wonder Taka looked ready to smash him to pieces… Also, ewww… Sorry, Mira…

"I'm telling you, we should make it a message-based test. You know, have one teammate be given the message but they can't tell their team by talking. That'll cut the teams down by three quarters." Mira stated, extracting the attention of, well, everyone, since they were still having their picnic lunch. Taka rolled his eyes at her.

"Been there, done that. Got idea that Iwa won't sue us over?" Taka said back sarcastically, causing his twin to glare at him. Sarada locked eyes with Boruto through her lenses before leaning over to face the twins.

"Are you talking about the Chunin Exams?" The Uchiha girl guessed, pushing her glasses up.

"Yeah." Mira groaned. "It's such a drag. The next one's not for five months but for some reason we have to have the tests prepared already."

She threw herself back in frustration, her left arm looping itself around Shikadai's neck. She leaned heavily against his side before snatching a piece of food off of his plate. Shikadai gave her an unimpressed stare.

"Ever heard of personal space, Mira?"

"Please!" Mira snorted. "Clearly, you've never been around Uzumaki women enough. We require hugs, shoulders to lean on and piggy back rides on a daily basis." _Huh, you know, that's actually explains so much._ "Don't worry, Dai, we'll teach you." Shikadai rolled his eyes but had a soft smile as Mira turned back to Sarada.

"Anyway, yeah, Taka and I have to help set up the Chunin Exams this year because we passed them last time. And we have to work with the guys from Suna, who fu- fudge, I said fudge, Mom! Who fudges up everything they touch!"

"Oh, is that so?" Oh damn, they just got Temari's undivided attention. Mira gulped, feeling the Suna woman's displeasure from hearing the girl's blunt opinions of her people.

"Oi, you can't blame us." Taka defended from his spot under the shade, his eyes closed like he was trying to get some shut-eye. "You're the one who allowed Kankuro to procreate with the chick from cryptography. Stupidity is hereditary, who knew?" Silence fell over the group before a loud smack was heard. Boruto glanced over at Dad Mom, who had face-palmed, side-glaring at her husband.

"That is your son, Shikamaru. I hope you're proud." She said sarcastically.

"Immensely."

"Ugh, don't encourage him. Takashi, Shikamira, enough. You two need to stop insulting Krow. He's not that bad." Her twins gave her deadpanned looks.

"Mom, you haven't read any of his ideas. They're awful." Mira whined. "Do you know how pissed off Kumo would be if we had the second test be capture-the-flag? They'll demand to host the Chunin Exams for the next five years to 'ensure that the level of shinobi excellence doesn't fall to the level of leaf pansies'." She finished in a funny, stuffy voice that made Boruto and his friends snicker.

"Even still-"

"Woah!" Aunt Ino said, holding her hands to make a 'T'. "Time out! Confused people here who need explanations!" Taka and Mira turned back to her, confusion in their eyes. Their parents looked over at the group, shifting towards them.

"Ask away." Not Uncle said, adjusting Motoko so that she was situated on his lap for another nap.

"Kankuro has a kid? Gaara let Kankuro have a kid?!" The horror in Shikadai's mom's voice was palpable. Uncle Shikamaru and Shikadai glanced at each other as disturbed looks entered their faces.

"Yes…Well… Kind of." Dad Mom commented slowly, glancing back at Hima and Beni. "I'll tell you all about that mess later." Oh, not suitable for little, non-shinobi ears.

"I'll hold you to it."

"And you two," Dad said next, pointing to the twins, "are creating the next Chunin Exams?"

"Yep. It's a drag and troublesome." Taka groaned, throwing his arms behind his head. "Do you know how hard it is to create a new exam every six month that has to be different and gain the approval of all of the Kages? Not to mention the Forest of Death is a no-go since one team decided to set it on fire again."

"Oi, Sarada and I were doing survival training and the tiger dodged! It's not our fault that those cats have good reflexes!"

"Who uses fire jutsus in a forest?!"

"Shinobi from the fire country, that's who!" Damn, Boruto was getting a nick in his neck from watching the twins argue back in and forth. Even if it was hilarious to watch.

"Alright, break it up." Not Uncle drawled with the steel of an order. "Unless you two want to show everyone how to do the obstacle course." Instantly, the pair paled before Mira laughed shakenly.

"No, we're good! Right, Taka?"

"Yep, no more arguing. Got it."

"Obstacle course?" Old Man Kakashi asked, getting a wicked smile from Dad Mom.

"Oh, just a little something for the twins. You'll see later. The twins have just volunteered to do a show for you all."

"What?! Mom?!"

"Troublesome…"

"This is your fault!"

"How is it my fault?!"

"You-"

"And to think, you guys thought that they were well-behaved." Not Uncle stated over the arguing. That's when a light bulb flashed in Boruto's brain as he remembered something that Mira said.

"Hey, wait!" Boruto shouted, gaining everyone's attention. "What do you mean you guys aren't doing capture-the-flag?"

"Oh, that!" Mira said, coughing dramatically before continuing. "The second stage of the exams has to be a survival mission. The equivalent of a B-Rank, boarder line A-Rank mission. On top of keeping your team alive, you have to do the objective of mission. Projecting an item, person, money, etc. Capture the flag is too easy, quite frankly."

"Easy?!" The genin exclaimed. Well, Boruto had thought that the exam was easy but he was a prodigy so that had to be it. Right?

"Think of it this way. You have to hide your flag while trying to find another team's flag. It's straightforward. What's going to stop you from keeping the flag with you and setting up a deco with a bunch of traps surrounding it? Nothing. Not to mention other teams would do the same thing. It becomes a waiting game, teams waiting to see which team is willing to advance first. And there's hardly any survival in it. Capture-the-flag only takes a few hours. A day at most. Most B-Ranks take a week, on average. Thus, defeating the purpose of the second exam." Taka explained.

Cricket, cricket. A leaf blew in the wind.

"Dickless, does this mean we shouldn't do capture-the-flag again for the next exam?"

"Yes, Sai." Dad said, rubbing his temples. Mira clocked her head to the side.

"I'm guessing you guys had capture-the-flag for your second exam. At least you guys didn't have to trek through the desert with only one water bottle and goldfish that you had to keep alive for four days." Mira said, trying to lighten the mood.

"May Goldie rest in peace." Taka joked. "He made for some great sushi."

"What? You ate your goldfish?!" Chocho asked in horror. Taka raised an eyebrow at her.

"It was your idea." Taka stated back before stretching, his back popping. "Then we had to do the tournament. Now, that was easy." Mira nodded in agreement.

"The tournament, easy?" Inojin parroted. The twins nodded.

"Yeah, my first match was some girl from Kiri who had a major obsession on the Mizukage. A real creepy yandere. Sorry excuse for a kunoichi focused too much on showing off her sword waving than on our match. The look on her face when I stole her blade, man, that was good." Mira chirped, a wicked grin spreading on her lips. Now, with that smile on her face, Mira looked a lot like her mother and a true Uzumaki.

"My match had me facing an Iwa shinobi who thought that since I was the Shika in Ino-Shika-Cho, if he trapped me in an earth dome, my shadows couldn't get him. Idiot, really. I'm more known for my taijutsu than my shadows." Taka stated, his face matching his twin's perfectly. "Then again, we planned for that to happen so brilliant planning on our part." The twins high-fived each other.

Boruto placed his chin in his hand as he thought over what the twins just told everyone. And one word stuck out more than any other one. Planning. The twins planned their matches out and from the sound of it, Taka deliberately made it so the guy he faced would think that Taka's attacks would be more shadow based versus taijutsu based. They used deception and trickier to win their matches. Like Boruto did against his match with Shikadai. _I wonder…_

"Taka, Mira, did you guys plan out your matches?" Boruto tried to keep his voice as calm and light-hearted as usual but if the look from Old Man Kakashi was anything to go by, he didn't do a good job at it.

"Well, kind of." Mira started. "The matches' line-up was available for everyone to see. We didn't have that long to get ready for them but we had a week to train and recoup after the preliminary matches. So, we did the natural thing."

"We spied on the competition."

"Yep!"

"And you allowed this?" Dad questioned Dad Mom, who shrugged.

"Gaara was running the exam that time around and didn't saying anything against it."

"If anything, it was good strategy on their parts." Not Uncle picked up. "The way the matches end up ensured that Shikamira and Takashi could be the final match if they played their cards right. By knowing their opponents and their abilities beforehand, they could create multiple different strategies to win against any opponent."

"For example, I had at least 83 different ways to beat Krow in my second match and I choose way #21 because I noticed that he didn't have time to fix his puppet from his first match. Granted, I had to modify it after he brought out the second puppet but I still won." Who creates 83 different strategies to beat someone… Mira, apparently….

"You don't think that's cheating?" Dad pressed. Puzzled, his counterpart turned fully to Dad, her sapphire eyes blinking.

"Cheating? No, I don't think it's cheating. Now, during our," Dad Mom waved between her and her husband, "Chunin Exams, the entire first exam was to cheat off of each other and not get caught. To be able to collect information off of each other for your own gain."

"What?!"

Deep down, Boruto knew that shouting was a bad idea. But can you blame him? He was pissed off now. The moment Dad Mom said what her Chunin Exams were like, Dad's face shifted. It was in that moment that Boruto realized that Dad had the same type of Chunin Exam as she did. Which meant-

"Boruto, stop. What you did was against the rules. I made it clear that the Kote wasn't allowed in the exams and I stand by my decision."

"But Dad-"

"A Kote? What's that?" The father and son stopped their glaring contest to turn back to Not Uncle. The man's eyes shown with curiosity as his wife leaned forward in confusion.

"This thing." Oi, how the hell did Taka get that?! "It's a cheap cope out of fuinjutsu, Mom."

"Did you-"

"Chill dude, I bought my own. Here." Taka tossed the tool over to his dad. "I wanted to see if actual fuinjutsu could make the jutsus in the mini-seals repeatable."

Boruto watched as Not Uncle explained the tool. His wife leaned over his shoulder, watching as the man fiddled with it. Then-

"Oi, did you just break it?" Dad Mom asked as Not Uncle removed the gear covering. He shook his head.

"No, I wanted to see something. You're going to hate this thing." Great, like Dad Mom, like Dad. Just what he needed…

"What does it do?"

"The Kote-" Mom started only to get cut off by Not Uncle.

"Look at the chamber. See, it works as a chakra reactor. Once the scroll is in place, the user needs to focus his chakra into his forearm. That hits the reader in the armband, which triggers the chamber to activate the scroll, releasing whatever jutsu you had sorted in it." The Lady Hokage straightened, the disbelief etched on her face.

"Are you telling me that absolutely anyone, even a civilian, could have the potential to perform ninjutsu with this thing? Even if they have no training?"

"From what I can tell, looks like it. Am I right?"

"Exactly." Old Man Kakashi confirmed. Dad Mom nodded to him, picking up the Kote. She fiddled with it, returning the gear back in place before attaching it to her wrist.

"Hm…" Boruto wasn't going to lie, his heart was racing as he watched Dad Mom stand abruptly and jumped away from the group before she tossed a scroll she got from somewhere. Where the hell did she get that? She tossed a scroll away from her and the group.

Poof!

Where the scroll landed stood a dummy that look suspiciously like Old Man Kakashi.

"Nice target, eh Sir?" Mirai ribbed, elbowing her charge. Boruto snickered at the 'I'm too old for this bullshit' face that the sixth Hokage made before his focus returned to Dad Mom as she unraveled the mini scroll. Her nose scrunched up.

"Who wrote this thing? Their penmanship is terrible!"

"I believe the scrolls are massed produced by a machine." Mom supplied.

"A machine? No wonder the brush strokes are awful! And the seal itself…" And Dad Mom started to ramble, listing off how one stroke was too far to the right. Or how another was too wide. Or how another stroke should have been added here.

"If you guys were wondering where Beni gets her rambling." Mira joked as her dad called out in a bored groan,

"Naruto, you've lost everybody. Just test the thing."

"What? I thought you liked it when-"

"Naruto…"

"Fine. Be that way. Alright!" The woman made hand signs so quick that Boruto couldn't catch the jutsu before it got sealed away, slamming her hand against the scroll. She placed the mini scroll into its chamber before pointing the Kote at the dummy.

WOOSH!

Crackle, crackle, crackle.

There goes the dummy…

"Well shit."

"Daddy, Inojin said a bad word."

"Not now, Motoko. What did you use? That had to be at least a B-Rank." Not Uncle questioned, getting a smirk from his wife.

"Fire Dragon Flame Bullet to be exact!" She raised the Kote to eye-level. A moment passed. Then two. He felt like he had ants in his pants when-

"I can see why you don't like it, Me but I don't see a problem with it."

"YES!"

"However, your Chunin Exams, your rules." Boruto felt like he had been stabbed in the heart with a kunai… Fine, so he was being dramatic. But seriously, Dad Mom, whose side are you on?

"And Takaski's right, using actual fuinjutsu should improve this thing tremendously and make it a reliable tool." Dad Mom finished, tossing the tool back to her son.

Boruto didn't know how to feel. On one hand, he had someone else who thought that the Kote was a useful tool. On the other hand, she agreed with Dad's decision at the Chunin Exams. But still, so what if he used the Kote in the Chunin Exams? It still didn't give Dad the right to embarrass him like he did!

"Embarrass you? How?" Boruto's ears warmed as everyone turned to him. _Fuck, was thinking out loud again!_ Boruto ignored the disappointed looks on his parents' face to stare at Dad Mom. The way she was standing, her left hand clocked on her hip and leaning on her left leg. The way her eyes seemed to glow with hidden wisdom. Yes, Boruto was weirded out by Dad Mom, how could he not be? But he had to admit, meeting Dad Mom was actually kinda cool. Even if it looked like she was about to scold him.

"Boruto got disqualified in our match for using the Kote." Thanks for telling the world, Shikadai.

"Look, I've said I was sorry already-"

"Were you now?" Dad Mom's question made him pause and glance back at her. She crossed her arms under her bust, then shrugged.

"If you were actually sorry, you wouldn't have asked the twins about their planning for their exams. You're sorry that you got caught, not that you planned to go against your father's rules."

"But-"

"Did you ever wonder your father's reasoning behind banning the Kote? Or asked, for that matter?" The woman continued to question. Her tone was changing slightly. Dad Mom was talking to him like he wasn't one of her kids but her student, similar to how Sarada's dad does. Boruto didn't trust his words so he just shook his head. The woman bobbed her head in Taka's direction.

"Tools like that have great potential. They also have a great risk. Shinobi can become dependent on them." She pulled an emerald necklace out of her collar, fiddling with it as her eyes bore into his. "A dependent shinobi is a dead shinobi."

"Shinobi that become dependent on anything, be it ninjutsu, weapons, techniques, the news spreads. It becomes a moniker, well known and easily exploitable by those who wish harm on the dependent shinobi. It's better to be underestimated and alive than overestimated and dead."

On that happy note, lunch was over.

The reality of Dad Mom's words stung the rest of the afternoon. Now Boruto understood what Dad was afraid of, why he hated the Kote. Dad was afraid that he would become dependent of the Kote at a young age. That he wouldn't be able to learn without it. That he could die because of it. Fuck, now he had to apologize to Dad. And he will, after he meets Team 7 and 10 NexGen, as Mira calls them.

"Alright, ready, Mira?" Taka asked as his twin rest her hand against the seal covered wall. The genin, plus Beni, Hima and Motoko, filled the living room. Everyone looked excited to actually meet Team 7 and 10 NexGen. Yet, Boruto's eyes drifted to Sarada, who looked uneased still. Like she was afraid to learn more about her other self. Hey, he may be a bit of an idiot but at least he cared about his teammates! Most of the time.

Anyway, lunch ended with most of the adults having to go back to their offices for a bit. Dad Mom had 'Gone off to explore the village!' and dragged her groaning husband along with her (and Motoko). That left Mom, Dad and Shikadai's Mom to 'watch' ( _cough_ babysit _cough_ ) the genin. The ladies were doing the dishes in the kitchen while Dad was leaning against the back wall, watching as Mira's chakra activated the seals and turned them silvery-black.

The wait was killing him as he watched Taka stand at attention in front of the screen when suddenly Taka glanced back at Boruto, a glim in his blue eyes.

Damn, Taka had a strong grip as he pulled Boruto so that they stood shoulder to shoulder before the screen.

"Taka, what-"

"You heard Mira. You're are a part of the fam now. That goes for you too, Dai, Hima." The other blonde shrugged, as if those words explained everything. And, in a twisted way, it kinda did. Taka and Beni, and Mira and Motoko, were family now.

More questions roared through Boruto's mind as the screen cleared up. Questions like, would Chocho be as annoying there as she was here? Or, would Inojin be just as blunt? Or did this Kenji kid look like yours truly? Clearly, the last question was the most important.

"Eternal Rival!" Boruto winced as the Other Metal cried out to them, his mini sunset genjutsu starting to leak out. Luckily, the genjutsu went away as quickly as it came.

"Hey Lee, what's up?" Taka waved lazily before slouching back. "Is our house still standing?"

"Of course, it is!" Other Chocho huffed, crossing her arms. "Now, where's the other us?! Just imagine it, another sexy Chocho!" Well, that answered the first question…

"Oh the horror." Taka smirked before Boruto felt pain. Ow! Shit!

"Ow, bro, that's my spleen!" Boruto whined as Taka's elbow dug into him from their dogpile.

"Sorry, man. Freaking Chocho and her strength. Troublesome." Taka muttered as he helped Boruto up as the two Akimichi girls blinked at each other.

"I'M SO PRETTY!"

"Tell me your secret!"

"No, tell me yours!"

"You first!

"No, you!" Thankfully, Taka reentered the screen, glaring down Chocho.

"Troublesome teammates." Taka groaned as he shoved Chocho back off screen. "Wait your turn. Ok, guys, step forward." Taka waved Boruto back before the screen as Shikadai and Hima followed quietly.

The genin on the screen looked odd. Not in a bad way but they dressed a lot like those old photos of Mom and Dad. Well, Metal and Chocho were actually dressed pretty much the same but Other Inojin had black pants and dark purple crop top on. And Glasses-Less Sarada dressed a lot like she was member of ANBU or something like that. Then there was the boy with a dog.

The kid looked like Hima. A lot like Hima. The same round face and big, Hyuga eyes. And he had Mom's light skin and blue hair. The hair was wild though, like he rolled out of bed and broke a comb trying to brush it. The red triangles on the boy's cheeks looked so wrong to Boruto.

Storytime! So, Mom's teammate, Kiba, had a super-duper big crush on her when they were younger. And Boruto was 85.76% certain that he still did (Hima did the math). There had been times when Kiba glared at Dad when he thought nobody was looking. Or that time when Mom got upset about Dad not being home on their anniversary and told Kiba, who then preceded to get Shino-Sensei so that they could drag Dad out of the office. The point is, Dad may not be Boruto's favorite person in the world, obviously, but that didn't mean he wanted _his_ Mom with anyone else.

So, this Kenji kid? Yeah, didn't like him. Even if his tiny, snow-white nin-dog was adorable.

"Alright, guys, this is Boruto Uzumaki." Taka pointed to the whiskered boy. Naturally, Boruto puffed out his chest. "His little sister, Himawari Uzumaki." The blue-haired girl waved happily that other genin. "And Shikadai Nara." Taka pointed next at Shikadai, rounding out the group.

"They've official been adopted into the Nara Uzumaki fam!" Mira's called out from her position but she stayed out of sight. Her chakra was giving them the connection with the other world, afterall. "Guys, this is Team 7 and 10 NexGen! You've already met Sarada and you can figure out who Chocho and Bastard are so the guy with the tattoos is Kenji and his nin-dog, Hyorinmaru! Says hi, Kenji!"

"Um, why does the girl look like Mom?" Kenji asked shakily, pointing a nervous finger at Hima. Then, someone stumped on his toe as they pushed him to the side. Ow! Really, Beni?! What is with people and hitting him all of the time? Boruto glared at the little redhead as she hopped forward.

"Kenji!" Beni pulled Himawari into a hug as she exclaimed. "Hima's mommy is Aunt Hinata! That makes us sisters! Isn't that cool?!"

"What?!" Kenji looked from the girls to Boruto, then back at the girls. "No, that isn't cool! That means I'm more related to Mira than ever! Help me, Sarada! I'm dying!" Geeze, dramatic much. Though, the scene felt oddly familiar. Weird…

"Get off!" Glasses-Less Sarada pushed him off of her lap before looking back at the screen. "Ignore him. It's nice to meet you guys, I guess." She seemed tense as Shikadai turned away to face Mira with a raised eyebrow.

"Oi, Mira, didn't you have something important to tell them?"

"Oh, yeah! Guys, is Uncle Kakashi there? Mom's got a message!" Mira called. Old Man Kakashi walked until he was in view. But before the masked man could speak, Beni started to ramble.

"Uncle Kakashi! I met the other you and Mirai! And they got me ramen and ice cream! And you actually paid! And I got to ride on your shoulder! And-"

"Hello, Beni. Tell me all about it when you get home."

"Kay!"

"Now, the message?"

"Right." Taka shifted to shinobi professionalism. Boruto blinked in confusion at the change.

"The Lady Hokage will be staying here with the Jonin Commander in order to take down a rogue Otsutsuki whose mission is to capture an awakened Nara child and Boruto Uzumaki. This Otsutsuki is looking for new chakra and new Kekkei Genkai. It shouldn't take more than a week but she wanted us to inform you of the situation." So formal. Weird.

"I see. And she couldn't tell me this because?"

"Well-"

A hand came down on Taka's shoulder as a man stepped between the Uzumaki boys. Boruto doesn't know why anyone would want to be Hokage and often wondered why anyone would think that his goofball and scatter-brained dad was a good person to be the Hokage. Yet, seeing Dad stand before another dimension in his cape, with no fear in his eyes, reminded Boruto that his dad was _the_ Hokage.

"Fuck, it's true. You two fell into a world where your mother's a man." Old Man Kakashi stated slowly, the shock and horror over taking his features. Takashi gave him a smirk.

"Surprise!"

"I swear, you two will be the death of me." Kakashi grumbled as Dad waved happily to Old Man Kakashi.

"I guess we know one thing for certain. Kakashi-Sensei never changes." He joked before becoming serious. "Your Hokage and her family will be returned back to you safe and sound. I promise."

An understanding passed between the men, before Dad nodded and left as quickly as he came. He headed back towards the kitchen.

"Anyway, Uncle Kakashi, Mom's getting ready-" Taka started. Before Boruto caught a glimpse of a teenager entering into view. He looked oddly familiar when-

CRASH!

A plate shattered. Everyone jumped as a Mom's wobbly voice called out,

"Neji?"

In a span of two seconds, Mira ripped her hand off of the wall, cutting the connection while the genin swiveled around. Mom was shaking. Taka hissed under his breath as her gaze locked onto him and his siblings.

"Goddammit, Mira. Now how do we explain this?"

 _Choji_

"So, do you want talk or are you going to do your Sasuke impersonation all day?"

"I don't have a Sasuke impersonation."

"Yeah, you do."

Choji rolled his eyes as he watched his teammates argue. Granted, this was a common occurrence but Ino's voice could get grating after a while. The gentle giant let her continue her intervention because quite frankly, it needed to happen. The moment Shikamaru made the bullshit excuse of checking on the account reports to escape _his own house_ , Naruto and the dimension hoppers, Choji and Ino followed.

Shikamaru didn't do emotions. Or more correctly, he didn't understand his own emotions and thought it too troublesome to deal with them. Choji learned this early on in their friendship and made it his duty as Shikamaru's best friend to help him when those emotions overpowered Shikamaru's logic. Naturally, this was a difficult task but Choji was more than ready to handle this. Oh, and Ino was too but her methods were more 'yell until the person caves' than Choji's 'wait until the person bursts from the pressure.'

"There's nothing to talk about." Shikamaru insisted only to receive deadpan looks from the pair. "I'm fine."

Yeah, right. Shikamaru was not fine. He was jumpy and fidgety. His fingers tapping, his knee bouncing, his unfocused eyes. The shadow user didn't look as bad as he did when he took Temari out for their first date but it was pretty damn close. Shikamaru avoided Choji's 'You know we're here for you so start talking' stare by looking at the report in his hand but Choji could tell that Shikamaru's brain wasn't processing the numbers on the page.

This went on, and on, and on until-

"Hey!"

"You've been staring at the same page for five minutes." Ino said, the report firmly in her hand. "What's going on in that mind, Shikamaru?"

"I told you-"

"You are not fine and if you say that you are, I'm going to hit you." Ino threated. Shikamaru met her glare head on before Choji stepped between them. It _so_ wouldn't help the situation if they trashed Shikamaru's office again and were sober this time around.

"Woah, calm down you two!" Choji placated before locking eyes with Shikamaru, patting his shoulder. "Just talk to us."

"Fine." _Huh, that was easier than usual._ "I'm embarrassed. There, happy?" _I stand corrected._

"You're a therapist's nightmare, you know?" Ino grumbled. "Why are you embarrassed?"

"You know why." Choji almost groaned as Shikamaru's smartassness caused Ino to finally snap. Not snap like psycho bitch snap but more 'aggressive methods need to be taken' snap.

"And you need to actually admit it so that you and Naruto can stop tip-toeing around each other!" Ino yelled, slapping her hands against his desk so that she could lean into his personal space. "So, you married your work wife in a different dimension? Congratulations, but what happens in that dimension is different than what happens here! Now bulk up and talk to Naruto before the village goes to hell!"

"He's not my work wife."

"Gah!" Throwing her hands up in defeat, Ino turned her glare to Choji. "You deal with him. I'll be back when someone stops acting like a five-year-old!" With that, she stomped out of the office, slamming the door behind her.

"She's just trying to help, Shikamaru." Choji scolded half-heartedly. Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

"She's being troublesome." He countered before lounging back into his chair.

Choji sighed in defeat at the advisor's stubbornness. He sympathized with his best friend's predicament, really, he did. It's just- Shikamaru needs to stop running from his emotions. Naras normally have a 'I'm not awake enough for your bullshit' persona which was pretty accurate when it came to most of the drama in the village. But their own drama, forget it! It was one of the main reasons they banded together with the Akimichi and Yamanaka, after all.

In fairness to Shikamaru, though, Choji could understand the brunet's stress and embarrassment over the entire situation. Naruto's girl self checked of every box when it came to Shikamaru's dream woman. Blonde, curvy and troublesome. It also didn't help that Girl Naruto acted so much like their Hokage and how similar the two worlds were. Knowing Shikamaru, it was the similarities between everything that was stopping him from seeing all of the differences in this fucked up situation.

"How's Temari with all of this?" The question wasn't going to get any reaction out of Shikamaru, Choji knew this. Yet, he had to try.

"Better than me." Choji blinked in surprise at Shikamaru's confession before smirking. They should have sent Ino away sooner if it got Shikamaru talking.

"And why is that?"

"Wipe that smirk off your face. Fine. Naruto's like my brother. You know that. How can I not be embarrassed that this other me married a girl version of my brother?"

"True-"

"And their kids. How could I not see it?! Takashi looks just like Shikadai and Benihime has my eyes, Choji. How did I miss it?" _Aw, it's the kids! And his hurt ego._ Choji realized as he watched the distressed advisor.

"Everyone missed it-"

"And the girls. It felt like they were my own daughters and I- I wanted-" Shikamaru trailed off, leaning his head against his hands. The room fell silent as the burden resurfaced.

Temari didn't know just how badly Shikamaru wanted and loved that baby. She didn't know because Shikamaru hid it from her so that she wouldn't be reminded of their loss. She didn't know how Shikamaru arrived at Choji's house with those pained, longing eyes. She didn't know how Shikamaru stupidly blamed himself for leaving for that trip, as if he could have saved the baby he had stayed. She didn't know how Shikamaru was jealous of Naruto for having multiple children, especially the little girl he had always wanted but could never say out loud. Which was ironic now, given the situation.

The moment Shikamaru arrived at Ino's house carrying Motoko with Shikamira teasing Shikadai at the man's side, Choji knew that those girls had him in the palms of their hands. Admittedly, Choji had been worried by the scene because of how calm and attached the girls were to the Nara men. Now, it made sense but Shikamaru's heart and sanity was shattering in the process.

"You make some good points." Choji confessed. "But you're missing something in all of this." Shikamaru looked up at his best friend.

"Like what?"

"Does it really matter what another you does? You're still you, Shikamaru. You don't have to compare yourself to this other you. Temari still loves you and you still love her. That hasn't changed." Slowly, Shikamaru nodded. Yet, he still looked down trotted.

"And I think the girls love you too, by the way." Golden brown eyes shot up in surprise as Choji continued. "They wouldn't be calling you 'Not Dad' or 'Other Daddy' if they didn't."

Ino returned a half an hour later, scaring the living crap out of them as she slammed the door open.

WHAM!

"Ino, be careful with the door!" Shikamaru ordered before yelping as the blonde woman leaped over the desk to grab ahold of the dark man's jacket. Choji stood up in confusion as Ino started to shake Shikamaru like a rag doll.

"NEJI HAD A SON!"

What?! Impossible!

"Get off of me, woman!" Shikamaru shrugged her off before giving her a calculating look. "What do you mean, Neji had a son?"

"Yeah, that's impossible." Choji parroted before throwing his hands up in a 'Don't Kill Me!' way as Ino's glare was redirected towards him.

"The other world, you morons! Neji had a kid in the other world! Do you know what that means?! There's a chance that he has one here!" Ino shouted, before she pushed the window open and perched on herself on the ledge. "Come on! Other You is waiting for us for the explanation!"

"This is so your fault!"

"My fault?! How the-"

"You should have given the signal when Ichiro entered the room!"

"I barely saw him-"

The twins, Choji has now learned, like to argue a lot. Choji could also see the resemblance between the twins and their counterparts. Internally, he was grateful that Chocho was an only child. The horror of her chatter doubled was, God, nope, to horrifying to think of. Though it was impressive how the twins were arguing with Shikadai and Boruto on their backs as they continued to do push-ups.

"Less talking, you two." Other Shika ordered from the seal-ridden wall as he paced before the group.

"His name is Ichiro?" Choji's gazed softened as they locked on Hinata's paler than normal features. Naruto's arm was slung over her shoulders in comfort. Then there was a tense cough from Ino. She nodded her head over to Lee and Choji felt bad for the taijutsu user.

Then a sense of relief over took Ino-Shika-Cho when the team realized that Ten-Ten wasn't here. She was away on a mission for Seduction. Which meant she wouldn't have to hear about Neji's son, even if he was from a different dimension.

"Yes, Ichiro. He's a jonin now and has a genin team. Neji would be very proud of him." Commander Nara confessed, stopping his pacing to finally face the group. The sight of the man's grim face made Choji gulp. He feared for what the Konoha 12 were about to learn.

"How?" Surprisingly, it was Shikamaru who spoke up, addressing his counterpart. Of course, he was still purposely ignoring Naruto but Choji would worry about that later.

"Neji had no lovers." Lee added firmly, his posture stiff. Other Shika's snort.

"Trust me, we thought so too." Commander Nara drawled before groaning. "Of all of the times Naruto had to leave, of course it would be now." His eyes drifted towards the ceiling, giving off the impression of 'of course, this would happen to me.'

"Where is she now?" Choji asked. From what Choji had learned about the couple, they appeared inseparable.

"Visiting the toad summons. News travels quickly and they wanted to meet her."

"What? How come I wasn't summoned too?!"

"Well-"

"ENOUGH!"

The room turned to face Hinata as she ripped herself out of Naruto's arms to start pacing. Her hands crimpled her bob as she turned to look at the eldest dimension hopper. She was shaking with pain and regret.

"Please, who is he? Please. I need to know." Hinata's voice cracked. The twins stopped their push-ups to look at their father with curiosity, like they didn't know the whole situation either. Not Shika sighed before stating,

"Fine. Just don't be disappointed if Ichiro doesn't exist here, Hinata." He paused again.

"Ichiro Hyuga, your adopted son and heir. He's Neji's only child." If anything, Hinata became paler as the man continued. "Nine months after the war ended, Naruto and I were summoned by the Kazekage because a newborn was abandoned after birth. All the mother left was a birth certificate with the last name filled out. None of the nurses could remember what the woman looked like or how she left. It was deduced that the mother was a Suna kunoichi who was a master of genjutsu."

"Suna?" Temari asked as her eyes narrowed dramatically as she crossed her arms. "This brat was born in Suna?"

"Yep."

"To a Suna Kunoichi?"

"Don't make me repeat myself, it's very troublesome."

"Impossible!" Lee yelled. The cheery man was gone, replaced by a distraught best friend and teammate. "Neji would never- He's youthful heart was with- should have been with…" As Lee trailed off, bracing himself against the wall in defeat. Tension grew before Hinata shook her head sadly.

"Neji never loved Ten-Ten that way." She confessed. "You and I both know that, Lee. Do you know the mother?"

She was addressing the Commander with her question. Choji's mind was racing, trying to list all of the Suna women that he knew. The list was a small as he expected it to be and most of the women on the list were already married or old ladies. Nothing, he got nothing. Commander Nara remained silent before he leveled his gaze at Hinata.

"I know who she is. Naruto knows who she is. That information is classified to you, Hinata."

"Fine, so the other me doesn't know who she is. I need to know. Please, Shikamaru." Hinata was begging now, the tears welling up in her eyes.

"I can't tell you. Even if I wanted to." Not Shika shook his head. "Orders from the Hokage."

"Well, I'm ordering you to tell us." Naruto tried but Not Shika just sent him a 'Really?' look.

"Nope, doesn't work like that. Look, I'm sorry, Hinata. I really am. But I-"

"Wait just a God damn minute! Shikadai, get me your cellphone!"

"What?! Mom-"

"Now!"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Huh. It seems like Temari's onto something." Ino smirked from the Ino-Shika-Cho corner. Temari now had the room's attention as she impatiently tapped her foot. The phone was on speaker.

"Come on, pick up you little shits." Temari grumbled before the phone finally picked up.

"Hello, you've reached the voicemail of the Kazekage's handsome bodyguard-"

"Kankuro, where is Gaara? I don't have time for your shit right now."

"Geeze, what died and crawled up your ass? Hi, Kankuro. How are you? I'm great-"

"Now, Kankuro!"

"Kankuro, give me the phone. Hello, Temari. What did Kankuro do now?"

"Me?! What the fuck did I do?! I haven't done jack-shit today!"

"Oh, really now? So all of the paperwork that you were supposed to be doing-"

"Paperwork, what paper-"

"Will you two shut up?!" And that is why Shikamaru complains about being deaf before he's forty.

"Now, Gaara, I need information and I needed it yesterday. Sen's kid. How old is he and who is the father because it sure as hell isn't Shira."

"Temari, you no longer have access to that informa-"

"Now, Garaa."

"Yes, ma'am. Kankuro will send it over to momentarily."

"On it."

"Perfect, see you two at the exams." Temari ended the call, smugly. Naturally, the entire room sweat-dropped. "Sen, that's who the mother is. I knew that kid wasn't Shira's."

"Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner." The Commander drawled.

"Sen, who's Sen?" Kiba asked.

"Sen of Suna. Jonin. Genjutsu Mistress. Lee probable remembers her teammate. Does the name Shira ring any bells, Lee?" Temari asked. Lee face was blank until-

"THE FAIR MAIDEN WITH THE FLUFFY FANS AND FLOWER GENJUTSU FROM THE SAND CHUNIN EXAMS!"

"Sand Chunin Exams?" Choji asked his team. "The one you and Temari had to supervise?"

"Apparently. The name's not ringing a bell… Hold on." Shikamaru stood before he walked over to a shelf on the other side of the room. He took out an album and flipped through a few pages. When he landed on the desired page, he removed a picture and handed it to his wife. "Is she in this picture?" Temari inspected it for a brief moment before nodding.

"Yep, here she is." Temari stated as she faced the picture towards the group.

Temari stood in the center of the picture with her arms wrapped around two girls. The girl on the right was painfully short. Her big, brown hair and eyes nearly swallowed her features. She had a pretty smile though and her blushing cheeks gave her a cute appearance. It was the girl on the left that Temari was point at though.

The girl on the left was tall, thin, and delicate to look at. Her pale skin made her darker features stand out, to her light brown and spiky high pony tail to her deep caramel eyes. She was skinny, so skinny that Choji was demand that she eat second and thirds just so that she wouldn't blow away in the wind. Her mesh body suit and red dress combo fit her prefectly. Attached to the belt on her waist was a stick with a ball of fluff. She was pretty, very pretty actually. The girls in the pictures did look familiar though.

"They were are your wedding." Choji remembered finally. "And she had a little boy with her."

"Yep, and that little boy is 'blind'." Temari put air quotes around the word blind. "Sen and I have been friends for years. After the war ended, she showed up with a blind baby. Her team didn't even know that she was pregnant until her labor broke the genjutsu she had on herself. She made up some bullshit about how it was a 'the world is ending' one-night stand with some random nin. The rumor going around Suna was that Shira, her ex-teammate, was the father. They both denied it, of course. Kid's got to be what, fifteen now?"

"Well, the timelines are matching up." The Commander agreed before turning to Hinata. "Yes, Sen of Suna is Ichiro's birth mother. Now, as to how Ichiro was conceived-"

CRACK, SMASH, BOOM.

In all of the drama, Choji and the rest of the adults for that matter, had forgotten about the kids. They were no longer in the house.

 _Shikadai_

This day had gone from absolute crap, to better, to soap-opera drama, to pure shit show and it wasn't even sunset yet. Mira, Boruto and the Lady Hok-Auntie had been kidnapped by aliens, the Jonin Commander was suffering from chakra depletion, and just about everything that could have gone, went wrong. Did he mention that he had his dead ancestor on speed dial now? _Man, what a fucking drag._

Oh, are you confused? Well, it all started when the kids decided to go outside while Shikadai's mom and uncles where distracting the other adults. Why did they go outside? It's Boruto's fault, obviously. The knucklehead was the one who suggested that they bail. Granted, not even Boruto could be blamed for the shit show that followed.

"You know, I still don't get it." Mira started as everyone got ready for a spar. "How would the Otsutsuki from your world know about me?" That earned her some looks.

"What do you mean?" Sarada asked, shifting her weight to one side. Mira scratched the back of her head, her nose wrinkling in thought.

"It's not common knowledge back at home that I'm 'Fertile with Yin.'" She air-quoted the title with annoyance. "Maybe the Otsutsuki back home would know about my chakra but how does the Otsutsuki _here_ know about me? And what do they want with Boruto? Nothing is adding up."

At that moment, Shikadai's brain went into overdrive. Four days. It had been four days since Mira and Taka arrived in their world. The Otsutsuki had attacked them yesterday and specifically singled out Mira. The only reason that everyone knew that the Otsutsuki were also after Boruto was because No Name told them that he was a target. Nothing was adding up. The only way that the Otsutsuki here would know about Mira was if-

"Didn't anyone ever tell you, brat? Curiosity kills the cat."

CRACK, SMASH, BOOM.

Everyone scattered as the ground below them collapsed. The kicked-up dust made him choke as Shikadai tried to jump out of the way of the racing yellow beam of light. He barely dodged, hissing as the light burned his left forearm.

"Dai, you ok?" Taka asked as he landed next to him. His blonde stunt double was gripping his kunai so tight that his knuckles were turning whiter than his bandages. Shikadai grunted back an affirmative. The pair had jumped away from the garden so that they were facing towards the house instead of the forest. And more specifically, facing the enemy.

"You know, you look _so much_ like your mother. It's sickening." The voice cooed. It was a feminine and familiar voice. And yet, it was colder than ice and sent a shiver down his spine. As the dust begin to settle, he could make out the yellow barrier that eclipsed his home. Trapped with the barrier was his team, Lee, Sarada, Mitsuki, Beni, Hima and Motoko. Outside of the barrier was Boruto and Mira, cautiously waiting from the rest of the dust to die down.

The wind blew, revealing a woman. Shikadai could feel his eyes widen as Taka growled in fury. She was thin and robbed with in blood red. It clashed with her long and loose pink hair.

"No fucking way." Boruto murmured in disbelief while Mira hissed in disgust.

"My, how you've grown, Shikamira." Sakuro Haruno drawled. "Your body will make the perfect host for Kaguya."

"No, TAKA!" Shikadai screamed as the enraged blonde rushed towards the pinkette, leg raised to drop-kick her. The woman dodged with ease, the area that she once stood caving under Taka's strength. She maneuvered herself so that she was looking at all of them now, her back to the forest.

This Sakura Haruno had longer and wilder hair. Her blood red kimono top was open, revealing her chest wrappings. Her lower half was cladded in white leggings with a black stripe down the seam. Black shinobi sandals covered her feet. The diamond on her forehead was venom green and matched the tattoo of what looked like a compass on the right side of her bellybutton. Around her neck was her Konoha headband, a scratch straight through the leaf. Her eyes were crazed and deadly. She made Anko-Sensei look sane.

"Tsk, tsk, Takashi. Is that anyway to greet your _favorite_ aunt?" She crossed her arms and faked a pout. "And here I thought Naruto taught you some manners."

"Go to hell, you bitch." Taka snarled, about to lunge forward again when Mira's shadow stopped him. Behind them, Shikadai could hear gasp of horror and a snarl of disgust. Oh, would you look at that, the adults finally arrived… Great timing, guys. Not!

"Tell me, Takashi, Shikamira. How is Sarada doing?" She was chuckling.

"Let go of me, Mira! I'm going to rip her head off!" If anything, Taka's declaration amused the pyshco even more. She was laughing now, her cackle ripping through the air before her gaze locked onto something behind the eldest Nara Uzumaki kids. Shikadai followed her gaze. Mira and Taka's dad was glaring daggers through the barrier at Psycho Sakura, the rest of the adults flanking him, completely powerless like last time.

"Oh, isn't that cute, Shikamaru. Your son is just like you. Always protecting the unwanted little whore, huh?"

"Benihime, start messing with this barrier." The Commander's eyes never left the enemy as Beni and Hima started to work on their cage.

"Come on, Shika." She was purring now. "Aren't you happy to see me? Aren't you _so_ glad that you didn't kill me when you had the chance? Have you told your other self about how much you've hated me because I didn't like your _poor_ Naruto?" Her eyes slid into an icy glare. "How I love to see you caged and unable to protect anyone, especially your spawns."

"You have no right to talk to him." Mira sneered. The woman shrugged.

"Perhaps." She took a set closer to the four, causing Mira to use her shadow to pull Taka and Shikadai back to stand with her and Boruto. "Not that I care. Now." She snapped her fingers. Instantly, they were surrounded by an infinite amount of shinobi puppets.

"Shikamira and Blonde Brat with the Whiskers-"

"Boruto!"

"Dude, so not the time for that." Shikadai hissed at his friend only for Psycho Sakura to nod in agreement.

"Shikamira and Boruto, come with me willingly. If not, well, I'll let you imagine the outcome."

"You jealous bitch." Shikadai glanced back to see this world's Sakura Haruno glaring at her copycat. The next moment, the two women were face to face, only the barrier separating them. Again, Shikadai felt a tug on his shadow as Mira maneuvered them away, creating as much space as she could away from the woman and her army.

"Oh would you look at that? Hello, me. Enjoying the show?" Sarada's mother flinched at her doppelganger's question before snarling,

"You're not me."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. After all, who else has this hair color?" Then Psycho turned her sights on Aunt Ino. "You should take notes, Ino. This," She pointed to herself. "is what it looks like to break a mind. Actually, you did me a favor. Inner was getting rather annoying, trying to make me feel guilty and all." She turned to look at Sasuke, lust entering her gaze.

"While she's distracted, take out as many puppets as you can. Hurry." Mira hissed out before her katanas appeared.

As they leaped into action, Shikadai realized just how painfully slow he and Boruto were compared to the twins when it came to hand-to-hand combat and teamwork (something Shikadai was solely blaming of Boruto, the dumbass). Granted, his taijutsu style was purely defensive. Naras don't directly engage the enemy. Their style was to dodge or divert any attacks sent their way and only strike when there was an opening. Luckily for them, Boruto actually had some half-ass taijutsu skills and Shikadai's kunai skills weren't too shabby. However, the damaged that they caused to the army was nowhere near the level the twins were causing. They were demolishing any puppet in their path.

Surprisingly, Mira took point, her katanas glinting in the sun as she leaped over puppets. Her shadow projected out before her, trapping her prey before she sliced through. She didn't stop to look back, plowing her way through the army. Any puppet she skipped, Taka was right behind her, pulverizing the remainders in speeds that made Lee look slow. The quartet were doing great and soon the army was nothing. Shikadai didn't bother celebrating.

 _She's letting us fight_. Shikadai bit back the words as the woman turned to face them. There was no doubt about it. Shikadai could almost taste her chakra, it was so strong. She was Kage level and she knew it. There was no way they could defeat her, two chunin and two genin. That wasn't going to stop them. They were going to go down swinging.

Her pale eyebrow was raised before she started to clap slowly, facing them completely. Over her shoulder, Shikadai flinched as his mother was sent flying back against their house, her giant fan lying beside her. Mom, in her fury and worry, had tried to break through the cage with pure strength and paid the price for her stupidity. He could make out Dad's worried cries to Mom, Aunt Ino's efforts to revive his mother, Uncle Naruto's outraged eyes.

"This can't be happening." Shikadai whispered under his breath. The twins, who were crouched in front of him and Boruto, flinched in unison before glancing back at them. Their eyes rippled with guilt.

"Don't even think about it!" Shikadai whipped his head towards Boruto as the blonde continued his declaration. "None of this is your guys fault! We're in this together and we'll get out of this!" Shikadai smiled at his friend (and brother, now, he guessed) before adding for the cheesiness of it all,

"Believe it!" At got a snort from Taka and a blinding smile from Mira.

"Just what I needed, two more troublesome brothers." Mira teased before Taka added,

"Man, what a drag but I guess we'll keep you around."

"How cute. If you four are quite done with your lovefest, I'm on a tight schedule." Psycho complained, a hand on her hip. "I'll admit though, you finished off the puppets sooner than I expected."

"How are you even here?" Mira asked. You could practically hear her brain turning. "You should be in our dimension, running from hunter-nin." A wicked grin ripped across Psycho's face.

"Oh, about that, my husband found me and brought me to this world." Crazy woman say what now? And who would be stupid enough to sleep with _her_? "Might as well tell you everything. I've got nothing to lose."

"Great, evil villain monologue time." Taka grumbled as the woman continued.

"My husband's wants to revive Kaguya in this world. Poor Zetsu" The adults behind her paled at the name. "was sealed with his mother and only got out just recently. Wouldn't you know it, he escaped the seal just in time to save me from Kumo's assassins. Not that I needed saving but it's the thought that counts."

"Zetsu, didn't Dad kill him?" Mira questioned. Taka opened his mouth to answer her but Shikadai beat him to it.

"Your dad killed the one in your world. Ours was sealed away with Kaguya." _Jump!_ Everyone dodged, Taka and Shikadai on one side of the new valley and Boruto and Mira on the other.

"It's rude to interrupt your elder, brats." Psycho pulled her heel out of the ground, patting the dust off of her pants. "My Zetsu misses his mother, who needs a new body. Shikamira's body has been volunteered as tribute." A growl built up in Shikadai. "As for you, Whiskered Spawn, that eye of yours is going to tell us where Kaguya is sealed away."

"Like hell I am!"

"Funny, you seem to think you have a choice." Before they could react, Psycho bit her thumb and started signing. "Summoning Jutsu!"

Psycho had squatted, her bloody hand on either side of the valley. The ground trembled as smoke overcame her. It was thick, so thick that Shikadai lost sight of his house behind her. The smoke started to barrel towards them.

 _ **Boy, don't breathe in the smoke!**_ Luckily, he didn't have to because Mira sent a gale force wind, dissipating the smoke before it could reach them.

 _ **Pay attention, child. You are far from ready for this. I'll lend you my strength for now but when this is over, boy, I expect you great things from you. Do the Naras proud, Shikadai. Only we are Fertile with Yin.**_ Shikadai could picture the Hag in the back of mind, Shika Nara standing in her robe of shadows, her golden eyes blazing. His chakra was roaring and he felt more awake than he ever had.

"Slugs?" Boruto questioned, earning a nod from Taka.

"Don't let them touch you and watch out for acid attacks." The dirty blonde explained, analyzing the beasts. "They're probably poisonous."

The two slugs were huge and easily towered over the low house. The slug on the right was a pale lavender with wicked venom green markings. The slug on the left was pearly white with sky blue markings. Movement to Shikadai's left drew his eyesight towards Mira's hand. What looked like a finger tapping impatiently on the gild of her blade was actually code. R-A-T. Time to make the hag proud.

Mira's shadow launched forward, latching onto the slugs as Shikadai leaped over Taka.

Rat - Bird; Shikadai signed in the air before landing right before where Mira's shadow split. _Shadow Stitching Jutsu_! His chakra felt open, in a way, like a dam releasing for the first time.

His shadow chased towards Psycho far faster than it ever had and clearly, he wasn't the only one who was surprised. Alarmed, Psycho back flipped, before sprinting. She raced up the yellow cage as Mira's shadow completely overtook the summons, smothering them into oblivion.

Psycho was growing angrier when she pivoted from the top from the cage. Just when he was about to grab her shadow, she pushed off the cage into the air.

"Oh no you don't!" Mira yelled as she signed some more, her shadow joining chase in the air. Their shadows linked together, weaving a big net to catch Psycho. The woman raced through her own hand signs before spewing acid. The brunettes retreated as their net took the brunt of the attack. Psycho landed, the earth cracking beneath her.

"Oi, Other Shika Brat, when did you wake up?" She cracked her neck before sneering. "You've Naras have been a pain in my ass for too damn long. I'm going to love killing you."

She raised her fist over her head, ready to slam it back onto the ground when the wind started shrieking. Above her, the sun glaring his form, Boruto appeared. He crossed his fingers. A trio of clones flanked him as they started their descent. Shuriken and kunai flew towards her. They missed her on purpose as the main Boruto yanked his fist back. The ninja wire shined as it wrapped itself around the woman and tightened. It dug into her skin, but she didn't cry out in pain.

"You think that this can hold me back?" She looked bored. That's when the main Boruto smirked and Psycho froze completely.

"Shadow possession jutsu." Boruto poofed away, revealing Taka in his place. "Complete."

"Why you little-"

"RASENGAN!" The actual Boruto yelled, throwing his rasengan at her like a discus. It turned invisible before slamming into her right side.

"UGH!" She was sent flying into the forest, taking down some trees as she flew.

"Aw hell yeah!" Boruto cheered, causing Shikadai to look at his friend only to do a double take.

"Boruto, your eye!" The whites of Boruto's right eye was pitch black. The pupil was clear but pale blue, looking extremely similar to his mother's byakugan without the popping veins.

"Yeah, I know. It decided to show up this time." Boruto explained before yelling, "Mira, two o'clock!"

Mira barely dodged as Psycho dug up beneath her. The woman pulled herself up and Shikadai nearly threw up at the sight of her. Boruto's rasengan had torn up her entire right side. It had ripped off her right arm below the elbow while spiraling into her abdomen so deep that he could almost see bone. And yet-

"Fuck, she can regenerate." Taka cursed as they watched her grow back the skin and arm. She raised her new arm, flexing it. Mira took her chance while the woman was distracted, one blade crackling with black lightening while the other burned charcoal flames. Green eyes blazing, Psycho raised her palms, grabbing ahold of the blades with her bare hands. Her skin seared but she didn't care.

"NO!" Shikadai couldn't tell you which of the boys roared the cry first. It happened like it was in slow motion. Taka started to run towards the scene, Shikadai let his shadow loose, Boruto tried to form another rasengan. They were too slow. They were too slow.

Using her grip on the blades as Mira freefell, Psycho pulled Mira closer before driving her heel straight into chest. The Nara heiress coughed blood as she was launched airborne, the consciousness leaving her eyes as she flew. Mira crumbled at least 50 yards away from where she once was and didn't move.

"Mira!" Taka called as he sprinted towards his fallen twin before an earth wall stalled his attempt to rescue his sister. Shikadai heard the sound of another summoning before Taka's fury caused him to turn the wall to dust. As the wall crumble, Shikadai caught sight of the summons. This slug was pale white with mint green accents. The slug was so pale that you could see through it. In the belly of the slug was Mira, green chakra surrounding her floating body.

"ROARING RIPTIDE!" Taka roared, his leg raised to Psycho's head only for her to grab his leg with blue hands. She threw Taka to the side like he was a rag doll. Psycho wasn't using her full strength, Shikadai could tell but all that changed in the following seconds.

With Taka down for a few second, Psycho used the speed she had been saving. Faster than he could blink, she was on Boruto and Shikadai was too slow. He was too fucking slow to save his best friend.

Her right hand punched him right underneath the blonde's ribcage. As Boruto keeled over, his activate eye got covered by her left palm, a purple glow covering the hand. For a horrifying millisecond, Shikadai though that she was going to rip out the eye but she didn't. As Boruto lost consciousness in her arms, she grabbed the back of his jacket and through the Uzumaki back at her slug. The slug swallowed the boy whole and Boruto joined Mira, unconscious and in green chakra. That's when the summons returned back to its own world, taking Mira and Boruto with it.

"No…"

He felt like the world was crumbling at his feet as his heart crawled into his throat. His eyes burned with tears and fury. This can't be happening, this can't be happening, this can't-

"Well, that was easy." At her words, Shikadai snapped.

"AH!" His shadow pierced into her, right through her tattoo, up and across into her heart and out her back. It should have killed her and for a split second, he thought he had. She hung from his shadow, her pink hair curtaining her face.

"Not bad, Other Shika Brat." She raised her head to him. He could clearly make out her bloody smile, her crazed eyes, her releasing green seal. "You'll have to do better than that." She gripped his shadow as leverage before heaving herself out.

Shikadai didn't know that Psycho was going to do next when he was grabbed. He suffered whiplash before his head rested against something soft, warm and safe. His vision became orange and yellow as he was moved faster than lightening, stopping once before moving again. Finally, he stopped moving. He was seated next to Taka, his back leaning against the yellowy cage. Another woman stood before them. She was blinding.

"Well, well, well. I see you finally made it." Psycho called out as woman in flames turned to face her. Nine-tails sprouted from her lower back, her once blue-eyes ruby red. "Naruto."

 **Author's Note - Damn, peeps. That chapter was long and tough to write. I needed to (kind of) clean up the Ichiro story, add some action and I always wanted to have the Kote scene so I decided, screw it, it's going in this chapter. Honestly guys, I'm probably going to make a second story just for the 2.0 timeline because my ideas for 2.0 are overwhelming. However, this story takes main priority. I hope you guys still like this story and where this is headed. Also, let me know if you guys think I threw too much into this chapter. Anyway, please review, favorite and follow! I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	15. Stupid Alien Thingy

**Author's Note - Oh my god, people, this chapter took the life out of me! It's not even the longest chapter I've ever written but man, it has everything and then some. Also, let me know if you guys like the flow of the chapter. It's kind of boarding the line for me when I comes to the flow of the story but then I was like, screw it, if I don't do this chapter, this story will never get finished. And we can't have that! I am determined to write a sequel for this story and I'll be damned if I don't! Side note, writing fight scenes in a way that allows you to picture the fight as you read it is hard. Brownie points if they can name which show a certain move in the fight scene is from! Review the name after you're done reading! Well, that should be it! On to the story!**

Chapter 15: Stupid Alien Thingy

 _Kakashi_

Team 7 was cursed. There was no way around it. As Kakashi stared pathetically through the yellow barrier, his mind made the connection. This insane Sakura was Obito, was Orochimaru, and at one point and time, was Sasuke. He could see it in her eyes. The curse for vengeance, the hunger for power, the crippling loneliness. Later on, Kakashi would ponder what the Other Sasuke's position had been on Team 7 but that was a story for another day.

The barrier was annoying and humiliating, Kakashi decided as the trapped group watched the Nara Uzumaki kids fight for their lives (and yes, that included Boruto and Shikadai now, too). They had put up a good effort, great effort, actually. Unfortunately for them, Tattoo Sakura (with an Otsutsuki clan symbol tattoo) was just as powerful, if not more powerful than this world's Sakura.

"I-" His female student struggled to form words as she watched in horror as Shikamira and Boruto vanished in the belly of slug. "How can the contract still listen to her? That shouldn't be possible."

"Forget the contract!" Snapped Naruto, his fisted banged against the barrier. His back was hunched, his teeth clinched. "We need to get out of here and help. Benihime, how much longer?"

"Um- Ten minutes! Maybe!" Benihime and Himawari sat before a section of the barrier that was riddle with lines and seals. The lines were their way out of their cage but the two Uzumaki girls needed to solve the elaborate labyrinth.

"Well, that was easy."

"AH!" Shikadai's battle cry pulled Kakashi back to the battle at hand. Tattoo Sakura went limp as his shadow ripped through her. It was then that Kakashi remembered the other person this Sakura reminded him of. Hidan.

"Not bad, Other Shika Brat." She raised her head to Shikadai. Even from the barrier, Kakashi could make out her bloody smile, her crazed eyes, her releasing green seal. Yep, definitely reminded Kakashi of Hidan. "You'll have to do better than that." She gripped the shadow as leverage before heaving herself out.

Shikadai looked like a deer in headlights (puns, don't you love them) as the woman healed herself shut. Then, a beaming orange light raced through the Nara forest. Tattoo Sakura sidestepped, a snarl on her lips as she glared at the beam of light. The beam snatched Shikadai away before making a sharp turn. It raced towards where Takashi laid, clenching his right leg in pain.

In the next second, both boys were reclined back against the barrier and the Lady Hokage stood protectively in front of them. In her Kuruma form.

When Kakashi first saw Naruto's Kuruma mode, he looked so much like Minato-Sensei that it hurt to look at him. It hurt to look at Girl Naruto, too. Because she looked like Kushina. A glowy version of Kushina, but the point still stands.

"Well, well, well. I see you finally made it. Naruto."

Her cape was gone so the golden, yellow-orange hue laid snug against her form, defining every curve. Her hair had fallen from its braid. It fell down her back and curled at the ends, resembling upside down flames. Sprouting from her lower back were nine tails, see-through and made of orange chakra. Girl Naruto was tense, her fists clenching and unclenching as she shifted and glared at her surroundings.

"Sakura." The growl was deep and husky. The underlining of Kurama's voice sent a shiver down his spine. "Where are they?"

"Who?" Tattoo Sakura flipped her long hair over her shoulder before inspecting her finger nails for mud. "Oh, your brat and other you's brat? They got lost on the road of life."

"Low blow, Hag."

"Shut up, Sai. Not now." Ino hissed as Kakashi choked on his saliva as Tattoo Sakura purposely stared over Girl Naruto's shoulder to smile at him as she spoke. The growl that escaped the blonde woman was deadly as she shifted so that Kakashi was no longer locking eyes with the enemy.

"Shikadai, Takashi. You two stay put." Girl Naruto reached her right hand back before the same barrier that she put of Mira the first time around surrounded them. "I've got a score to settle."

"But Mom-"

"But Ma'am-"

"Auntie, Shikadai, Auntie."

"Fine, Auntie, we can still-"

"Shikadai, Takashi's in no condition to fight with his leg like." Kakashi inspected Taka's leg and agreed with the mother's assessment. Tattoo Sakura had managed to break it while chopping off its chakra supply. "If the barrier goes down before he can free the others, I need you to protect him. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."

"Mom-"

"Takashi Nara Uzumaki, do not make me repeat myself, young man." At the steel in her order, Taka nodded to her back and maneuvered himself so that he was facing the yellow barrier.

"Beni, move it over here!"

"Kay!"

"Ugh, you make me sick. Then again, you always have." Tattoo Sakura complained before spitting off to the side. The spit connected to the earth, acid tearing through it before a small but sizzling hole remained. "Poor little Naruto. Always protected by everyone."

"That's a lie." Tattoo Sakura raised an eyebrow in a mocking manner at Girl Naruto.

"Bullshit. You were given everything and anything. Everyone was always protecting you, treating you like you were a goddess on earth." Her voice got louder with every sentence. "You were everyone's favorite. The Naras, Kakashi's, Sasuke's, Sai's, Tsuande's. The list goes on and on! It was always Naruto this, Naruto that! Well, that ends now!" The releasing green seal returned back to its original form now that she was completely healed. "When Kaguya is back, I'll get the life I should have. And you and your brats are going to help."

"Like hell we will."

"We'll see about that." She raised her right hand to her face. Her pointer and middle finger out with the other fingers making a fist. The seal of confrontation.

"Nothing I say can stop you." Girl Naruto sighed, her Kurama mode dissipating.

"Please, I became immune to your Talk no Jutsu a long time ago."

"Let's end this, Sakura." Girl Naruto made the seal.

"Let's."

The wind blew before a leaf fell from an on old oak tree. The leaf landed. Blue and green eyes locked with primal gazes. The pair of women rushed towards each other.

Kakashi blinked when the two women changed before his eyes. Instead stood a pair of genin. One genin had spiky blonde hair pulled into a high ponytail and wore a brunt orange battle yukata with dark navy-blue fishnet leggings. Her forehead protector was worn proudly on her forehead while her eager smile enhanced by the cute whisker marks on her cheeks. The other genin had long pink hair that was held back by her headband forehead protector. She wore a ruby-red dress with white accents and navy-blue shorts underneath. Her face was riddle with annoyance. The short, little girls rushed towards each other before their kunai collided in the middle, the 'don't to let the other win' look covering their face.

CLANK!

Kakashi blinked again and gone were the genin, replaced by woman fighting to the death, their kunai tossed to the side before they rushed towards each again for hand-to-hand combat.

"Did anyone else see that?" It was Hinata who had voiced the question. As murmurs of agreement and confusion rippled through the trapped group, Kakashi returned his focus back to the action. The fight before them displayed the true strength and viciousness of a kunoichi that her highest level. The taijutsu was unmatched.

Tattoo Sakura was on the offense, sending a mealy of punches to the sides of Girl Naruto. Girl Naruto dodged every punch until one sailed past her left cheek. With her right hand, she pushed Tattoo Sakura's arm down as she leapt straight up. The sudden lose in balance was enough to distract Tattoo Sakura as the hovering blonde woman jammed her left elbow right in the back of the neck. Crack!

Girl Naruto didn't stop there, driving her left knee up into the pinkette's stomach. The pinkette haired woman crumbled to pieces, quite literally, revealing that it had been an earth clone in Tattoo Sakura's place. Again, Girl Naruto took to the air as Tattoo Sakura dug herself from the earth completely. Girl Naruto, flipping herself over and over almost like a spinning bowling ball, drove her heel into Tattoo Sakura crisscross arms, which were protecting her head. The earth cratered beneath them.

"Rah!" Tattoo Sakura pushed Girl Naruto away, who flipped and preformed acrobatic tricks in the air as she flew. Tattoo Sakura dug her hands into the earth, pull out a good chunk of the Nara's backyard and was about to flinging it at Girl Naruto when her gaze shifted.

"Shit!" Takashi and Shikadai cried in unison before Shikadai's shadow formed another level to the barrier as the boulder sailed towards them. That was unnecessary though, as Girl Naruto leaped in front of the boulder and punched it to itty-bitty pieces.

It was like watching two Tsuandes fight each other, which was a terrifying picture in it of itself. Girl Naruto glared back at her opponent, her blue eyes narrowly dramatically.

"Leave them out of this!"

"Oops, sorry." She didn't sound sorry at all. "My aim was off. Besides, what's one less Nara in the world?" Pissed off, Girl Naruto raced forward against her opponent again as the taijutsu battle continued.

Girl Naruto threw at right hook at Tattoo Sakura's head. The pinkette dunked, pivoted so that her inside foot, her left foot, swung out and upwards. Girl Naruto blocked the kick to her head before quickly leaping out of the way to avoid Tattoo Sakura's attempted swipe at her legs. Tattoo Sakura raced forward, swinging a kick with her left leg, followed by the right one. Girl Naruto leaned back, almost back bending away before snapping back. The blonde woman launched her right foot and clipped Tattoo Sakura's ear.

"Gah!" Not letting up, Girl Naruto used the distraction to cross her fingers, only for Tattoo Sakura to start up a barrage of punches, disrupting the jutsu. Girl Naruto flipped away for the assault, gaining air again.

"Why isn't Naruto's chick form going all out?" Kiba asked as they watched Girl Naturo perform Siren's Snare on Tattoo Sakura, driving her back into a crater. "Not that this isn't awesomely terrifying enough as it is." Tattoo Sakura retaliated by grabbing Girl Naruto, who was using wind chakra to keep herself in the air, by her blonde hair and throwing the other woman over her shoulder. Girl Naruto slammed into top of their cage, shaking the entire structure.

"Naruto!" Her husband shouted as the woman rolled to the side, Tattoo Sakura right fist pounding where she once lay. There was another cracking noise. Gross, no arm should bend that way.

"Fuck!" Tattoo Sakura swore before glaring at Girl Naruto. "You broke my arm." Naturally, Tattoo Sakura snapped it back into place.

"You're the idiot who decided to punch through an unbreakable barrier." Girl Naruto started signing before taking in air. "Wind Style: Immense Breakthrough!"

Hurricane force gales sent Tattoo Sakura flying into a personal tornado. The tornado moved her off the barrier. Tattoo Sakura was flipped every which way. It would hold her but not for long. Girl Naruto pulled out her fans, sending chakra through them before sending another attack at the tornado.

"Wind Style: Great Whirlwind Rasengan!" The tornado was now laced with even more of Girl Naruto's chakra, causing cuts to appear on Tattoo Sakura's body as she flipped.

"Thanks again, Temari, for helping me with that move." Girl Naruto said before sliding down to rest next to where the boys rested and they all stood.

"You're welcome, I guess." The now awake Suna woman responded with hesitation before Girl Naruto looked at her son.

"Report."

"Level 10 Fuinjutsu barrier. Odd seals on top of even seals with chakra woven into the interlocking seals. Whoever made this was good. Better than the last barrier. Not only is it stopping them for using chakra, it's projecting another barrier around the compound-"

"Which is stopping any ANBU from interfering. Can I punch through it?" At her question, Taka shook his head.

"Not with the amount of yang chakra you've got, Mom. This entire thing is pure yang chakra. If anything, you'd make it stronger. This barrier needs a large source of yin chakra in order to overload it."

"In that case-" Commander Nara started, only for his wife to look up with him with a worried-filled glare.

"Absolutely not! You are not pulling that shit again. The last time you did that-"

"I was fine."

"You were not fine! You nearly died! Again!"

"The key word is nearly- Naruto, move!" Girl Naruto jumped out of the way as a black blob crashed next to the barrier where she once stood. The blob turned as if ready to attack the boys when it hissed and moved. Another protection barrier from around the boys. Girl Naruto moved away from the barriers, the blob chasing her. Just as it was about to catch her, her hand formed the kai release. Blue chakra spirals formed in the air, creating four corners around the blob before becoming an upside-down pyramid. Then the pyramid sprouted chakra chains that wrapped themselves around trees, suspending the blue pyramid in the air.

"Zetsu." The name caused a ripple of gasps from the audience as they watched the blob take shape of a man. He was completely pitch black, the definition of his form only coming from the sun forming gray lines. His eyes were pupiless and his face black before more definition came. Kakashi choked again as Zetsu took on a bastardized form of Obito.

"Naruto Uzumaki Nara. We meet at last. I must say, I was not expecting this. Sakura's descriptions of you don't do you justice." Commander Nara growled at the almost flirtatious tone that Zetsu used. "And this barrier, simply marvelous."

"Flattery gets you nowhere, Zetsu." Well, actually, it does but that was _so_ not the point. "Where are my children, Zetsu?" That caused a lot of raised eyebrows, including one from Zetsu.

"Oh, so you consider the children here yours? Including the Kazekage's nephew?" She looked like she was biting back her tongue to stop herself from answering but that was all the information that Zetsu needed.

"I see." He chuckled. "This is truly interesting. No matter. They" He bobbed his head towards the boys. "are not important. You and those other children, on the other hand, are."

"How?" She crossed her arms under her chest, glaring at the alien-like thingy. "I'd have killed you by now if you didn't have my kids somewhere."

"Now, now, Lady Hokage. Patience." Zetsu shifted so that he could look at this world's Naruto as he asked,

"Have you told yourself how your pregnancies have made your seal with the Kyuubi weaker, Milady?" Girl Naruto paled.

"Fucking bitch told him." Commander Nara growled causing the trapped group to stare at him. _Pregnancies, what did pregnancies have to do with-_

"Clearly, you haven't-"

"You can't have Kurama!" The Lady Hokage widen her stance. "I won't let you."

"You don't have a choice." That's when the tornado was ripped apart by the rising earth dragon.

"Earth Style: Earth Dragon!" A bleeding but rapidly healing Tattoo Sakura yelled at the base of her earth dragon. It roared towards Girl Naruto, who prepared her counter. One arm was covered with water, the other was crackling with. She clapped her palms together in front of her face before pushing towards the approaching dragon.

"Lightening Water Style: Lightening Water Dragon!" The two beasts clashed, canceling each other out in a ball of smoke.

Tattoo Sakura busted through the smoke, a long black and red spear aimed at Girl Naruto. This time her chains appeared as Girl Naruto drew her fans, knocking Tattoo Sakura's blade away before leaping back. She threw her left fan at Tattoo Sakura. The fan and chained wrapped themselves around the center of the spear before Girl Naruto tugged. Tattoo Sakura allowed herself and her spear to be pulled towards her opponent.

Like a ball and chain, Girl Naruto twirled Tattoo Sakura around, plowing her into tree after tree. Grunting in pain, Tattoo Sakura used her strength turned her spear so that the blade pierced the earth, stopping the momentum. Tattoo Sakura slammed her heel into the ground again, the parting earth forcing the Lady Hokage to move and recall back her fan and chain.

Tattoo Sakura used this moment to attack, rushing forward with rapid fire stabs at the other women's chest, arms, legs, everywhere. Girl Naruto wasn't an easy target though. She dodged and twirled and parried any attack that came her way. Sakura stabbed at her shoulder, Naruto parried with her fan. Sakura slash at her elbow, a chain was ready to block it. The women fought, twirling and twisting towards and away from each other. Their weapons kept clinking and chiming with every parry. As they fought, they moved closer and closer to where their dragons had clashed. Tattoo Sakura found an opening, ready to stab Girl Naruto through her heart.

"NO!"

Clink.

Turns out, Girl Naruto was just as unpredictable as regular Naruto. Kakashi stared in disbelief at the women trapped in ice. Right as Tattoo Sakura was about to stab Girl Naruto throw the heart with her spear, they had stepped in the large body of leftover water Girl Naruto had used for her water dragon. Somehow, using a jutsu Kakashi had never seen before (which, again, was saying something) Girl Naruto had completely encased the pair in ice. Girl Naruto then breathed through her nose, slow unmelting herself and only herself. Tattoo Sakura remained completely froze and unable to move.

"No, Dai!" Taka's screamed pulled everyone's attention back to the upside pyramid, which was missing its prisoner. Everyone pivoted to the other side of the yard, where Zetsu had appeared. Shikadai was struggling in against the alien thingy's grasp on the back of his neck.

"No…" Shikamaru whispered pitifully, completely useless and unable to save his son.

"Another awaken Nara?" Zetsu wondered, his yellow gaze locked on the Lady Hokage. "And he bears a striking resemblance to your husband, perhaps even more so than your own children, Milady."

"Let him go!" Girl Naruto growled, her Kyuubi eyes returning as Zetsu started chuckling. The alien heaved Shikadai up before readjusting his grip so that he was holding Shikadai close to his chest, the boy a foot off the ground. Shikadai was wincing, tears starting to well up.

"Funny, I can't merge with him." Zetsu noticed as the hand not holding the teal-eyed boy shifted, becoming a sharp wooden stack. The tip was resting against Shikadai's pale neck. "No matter. This should do the trick though." He started to draw blood.

"WAIT!"

The woman's scream stopped the alien. Everyone looked up to watch as the Lady Hokage raised her hands before dropping her fans, her chains vanishing. The metal weapons clacked at her feet. There was a resigned look in her face. Her eyes locked with Shikadai, warm with – love, yes, that was love in her eyes. 'It's going to be okay' her lips mouthed as tree roots sprouted under her feet. She was going to give herself up for a child that wasn't her own. It was funny, Kakashi realized later on, how being a different gender didn't change the core of their personality. They truly were one, well, two of a kind.

"No! Don't! I'm not-" Shikadai protested but the woman shook her head as the roots rose. Her right hand quickly made three signs that Kakashi had never seen before at Shikadai and Takashi. Two roots wrapped themselves around her wrists, violently locking her arms behind back as another collared her neck. The roots pulled Girl Naruto to her knees before forming a cage. The cage resembled a cast iron bird cage, with Girl Naruto as its prisoner. Zetsu smirked, throwing Shikadai to the side. Taka, his leg still fucked up, half lunged to barely catch the other boy. They tumbled and rolled, their backs slamming into the yellow barrier.

"Ugh! No, Mom!"

"Auntie-" The boys struggled to their feet, Shikadai slinging Taka's arm over his shoulders to let the blonde lean into him.

"Stand down, boys!"

"You should listen to your mother, Takashi Nara Uzumaki." Zetsu chided, roots overgrowing and producing a wall, blocking the boys from trying to reach Girl Naruto.

Crick, CRACK!

"Ah, you escaped."

"No thanks to you, you fucker." Tattoo Sakura shivered, joining her husband's side before starting another glaring contest with Girl Naruto. "Bitch."

"Whore."

"Slut-"

"Ladies, you are both pretty. Now, dear, if you would be so kind." Tattoo Sakura wasted no time, heaving the giant bird cage with Girl Naruto still trapped inside. She hissed as her body slammed against the side of her prison. Zetsu turned to face the trapped group.

"Do look out for the full moon tonight." With that, Zetsu became a blob again, covering Tattoo Sakura and Girl Naruto and disappearing.

They were gone.

They were gone.

 _Takashi_

He had failed. Screwed up. Fucked up so royally that there was absolutely no way he could fix it. Mom and Mira, his mother and his fucking twin sister, were gone. Oh, and Boruto too but you'll have to excuse Takashi for putting the most important women in his life above one of his newest brothers.

Besides the point, Taka choked back the disgust mixture of tears and bile as he leant against Shikadai. Poor Dai, who had almost got skewed into a Dai Dango, had to basically manhandle him back over to the stupid barrier from hell.

His leg was fucked up, he couldn't use his seals to fix it and that bitch knew that the moment she did it. You see, Taka's seals, especially the healing ones, manipulated the user's own chakra into healing chakra, then amplified it in order to ensure a speedy recovery. However, since Psycho Haruno cut off the chakra to his leg, his seal was useless until someone reopened it for him. What a drag.

And yes, he was clinging to Dai like a baby because dammit, Dai's chakra was so much like Mira's that it was comforting. But could you blame him? After everything that had just passed and Taka's heightening separation anxiety and worry, he didn't even want to know what he would do if Dai was suddenly whisked off too. Clearly, he and Dai were on the same wavelength if his grip was anything to go by (which was weird because that only happened with Mira and Dai wasn't Mira, expect he was, and- dammit, Taka was confusing himself just thinking about it).

"We're going to get them back." Dai promised, shouldering more of Taka's weight when the blonde had winced after putting pressure on his bad leg. Taka glanced over to his sister's counterpart. The determined look on his face was so Mira.

"And then we'll raise hell while doing it."

"Spoken like a true Nara Uzumaki." Taka smirked slight, earning one back in return before they face the Yellow Cube of Suppression and Headaches. Taka gulped as his father looked at him before flinching with guilt. Dad had that look in his eyes. He was hurting, upset, lost and angry. He was so angry and his father had every right to be angry with him. He had failed to protect the most important women in their lives.

He had failed.

"Dad, I'm-" The tears were falling now and his voice was shaking. He couldn't look the man in the eye. _I deserve Dad hating me. I must make him sick. Hell, I make myself sick._

"Takashi, stop. Look at me, son." The soft tone in Dad's words and Dai's soft nudge made Taka look up. To his utter surprise, Dad no longer looked angry. Yeah, he was still upset but not at him. Not at his little boy. "Never apologize for events out of your control."

"But-" Takashi started, wanting to cry even more. His voice was cracking. "But Mira and Mom and Ruto are-"

"We will get them back, son. But to do that, I'm going to have to break an order." The commander's comment caused everyone to look at him in confusion. Except for Taka, who stared that his old man in horror.

No, Dad wouldn't do something as stupid and reckless as to try and an override a suppression barrier from the inside. That was something Mom would do, not Dad! Except Mom wasn't here right now (Guy Mom kinda didn't count, especially with his lack of fuinjutsu knowledge) and sadly, Dad was right. He was probably the only one who can break down this barrier from the inside. That didn't mean that Taka had to like it.

"No! Dad, please! If I had more time I could-"

More time, more time, there was no more time. Taka knew what Zetsu wanted with Mira and Mom now and he knew that they were running out of time. Zetsu wanted to resurrect Kaguya tonight, on the full moon.

Taka trailed off as his father approached the barrier. The man placed his hand against it. Hesitating, Taka did the same. A moment passed through the father and son. Taka could see it in his father's golden-brown eyes, almost as if Dad was transmitting the plan forming in his brain to his son through sight alone. Dad was entrusting him to finish the mission. The message was received. Taka swore right then and there. He wouldn't fail this time. Then the Commander stepped back and did an unrecognizable sign.

Well, unrecognizable to everyone in this world except Taka and Benihime both knew it. It was Mom and Dad's sign that they made when they wanted to say 'I love you' to each other but didn't want anyone to know. A quick fist with the pinky sticking out, followed by tucking the pinky back in, the pointer finger and thumb popping back out. Finally, Dad finished the sign by fisting his hand again, his thumb and pinky sticking out again. _Well, at least Dad still loves me._

"You and your sister are still going to be in so much trouble when this is all over." Yep, that was his old man. Smiling, Taka signed his Dad back before saluting his father.

Beni, shit, he had forgotten about everyone else in his own pity fest, was not happy to say the least. She leaped forward, attaching herself to Dad's leg. Clearly, she realized that Dad was about to do something with seals, which Mom had banned him from doing since forever. Dad sighed, leaning down to cradle Beni against his chest.

"Nara, Uzumaki, I have a request for you." Guy Mom and Other Dad (Mira and Taka had decided to change Not Dad's name to Other Dad because it fit the situation better) both straightened as the Commander turned to them. "What I'm about to do is incredible stupid and if I live through this, my wife will probably kill me for doing something so reckless. Tch, what a drag."

"What are you going to do?" Uncle Choji asked, the worry palpable in his voice.

"Dad's going to use his chakra to override the barrier." Taka explained in an exhausted voice. "This thing needs a huge dose of yin chakra to break it down." Dai looked up in confusion.

"Then maybe I should-"

"No, Shikadai. No, we can't afford to have you down for the count. Not with the control you have over your awaken chakra." Dad explained, rocking Beni back and forth. It was probably a very good thing that Mirai, when this had all started, brought Motoko back inside the house so she wouldn't be scarred for life.

"What do you mean?" Other Dad asked his counterpart, who softly pecked Beni's forehead, before answering,

"Shikadai's control over his awaken chakra is unmatched. You guys are going to need him because he's going to be the one to lead you to where those bastards took everyone."

"How?"

"You already know. Afterall, it's what got us into this mess in the first place. Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two." With that, Dad tried to place Beni on the ground. Unfortunately for him, Beni was throwing down an Uzumaki Tantrum. Hell, he would be too if he didn't know that this was the only way to save everyone.

"NO! No, Daddy! No!"

"Benihime-"

"Bad Daddy! You shouldn't mess with seals! You're bad at it!" That got a soft chuckle out of Dad as he knelt down, placing Beni before him. Beni refused to look at him so Dad had to gentle lift her chin up. They were eye-level, golden-brown locking with golden-brown.

"You're right. I'm very bad with seals. That's why I leave them to you, your brother and your mother." He pushed a lock of red hair back behind her ear as Beni started wiping tears back. "But I need to do this. Only I can do this."

"To help save Mommy?"

"To help save Mommy."

"But Mommy said that you need to stop trying to save her because then you'll get hurt and then you'll be gone, and Mommy's already missing and we just got you back and you can't leave again and-"

"Sh. Look at me, my Mini Whirlpool." If anything, Beni started to cry even harder at Dad's nickname for her. "Listen to me, it's going to take a lot to stop your mother and I from coming home to you and your siblings. We love you all very, very much. You four mean the world to us. We'll do anything and everything in our power to come home. But I need you to be the strong kunoichi that I know you can be. I'm going to be taking a really long nap so I want you to listen to everyone here while I'm out. Do you understand, Benihime?"

"Do I have to listen to Other Daddy and Guy Mommy?"

"Especially them."

"And you're going to be napping?"

"Remember when you ran too much with Mommy that one time and didn't wake up until really late at night? It's going to be like that." Yeah, expect hell of a lot worse, if this doesn't kill Dad in one go. But Beni _so_ didn't need to know those details right now.

"Oh! Hmph, lazy Daddy." But Beni was smiling again and that made Dad smile. He signed 'I love you' and she signed it back before turning to Hima. She took Hima's hand, pulling the other Uzumaki girl away from the wall.

"Come on, Hima. We have to give Daddy space. He's about to do something stupid."

"Very eloquent, Benihime. Everyone, back away from the barrier." Dad ordered. Everyone gave him space as Dad pulled the labyrinth key so that it was level with his chest. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"Holy shit-"

"How the-"

"He could use chakra-"

"Not now! Don't distract him! I'll explain later!" Taka yelled as a black chakra circle formed at his father's feet. The violent chakra started off like a ring of fire before rising, resembling lightening. The lightening crackled through him, causing Dad to bit back the pain. Taking a step forward, Dad's strong hands gripped the labyrinth key. As his yin chakra reacted with the key, black chakra lines started from the ley before it started to spread to every corner of the barrier.

"Rah, GRAH!" Dad pried the barrier open, the yellow cube crystallizing black before shattering completely.

"He did it!" Dai watched in awe before Taka pushed himself away. "Taka, wait!"

Taka didn't care that he was fucking up his leg even more. He didn't care that the other adults were standing in shock at what they had just witnessed. He didn't care that Beni had started screaming. Dad was barely standing, his eyes starting to glaze over, his breath getting heavy.

Taka collapsed under the weight of his father, near sobbing from the pain in his leg. That didn't matter though. Dad needed him and fuck, he wasn't breathing now! Quickly but gently laying his father on the ground, Taka dug through his seals pack on his unbroken leg before finding his 'Only Encase on Emergency' seal. Ripping Dad's vest and shirt open, he slapped the seal against his father's heart and prayed as he released the seal.

Taka's 'Only Encase of Emergency' was pure healing chakra curtesy of Kurama. It could heal any wound and, in this case, ensure that Dad didn't kill over from severe chakra depletion. Oh, and cardiac arrest.

Taka almost sobbed in relief when orange chakra escaped the seal, wrapping around Dad like a mummy. Gentle, he saw the slight rise and fall of Dad's chest. He would be ok. He's going to be ok. Mom's chakra had saved Dad once again. A hand fell on his shoulder, snapping Taka out of his thought as Guy Mom knelt next to him.

"Is it ok to move him?" The Lord Hokage's voice was gentle. Like Mom's. God, Mira was right, he was such a crybaby. Not trusting his voice, Taka nodded and watched as Uncle Choji and Lee-Sensei lift his father back inside. He watched until he couldn't see his father anymore before looking up at Guy Mom's blue-eyes. The same eyes that he had. Taka didn't protest when Guy Mom gently lifted him up bridal-style and he had no problem admitting that he, yes, did curl up against the man because dammit, Guy Mom was Mom (ish) and he needed a little bit of his mother right now.

They had laid Dad across the couch as Aunt Ino looked him over, fussing like a mad woman.

"Sai, get me a towel and warm water! And make sure that water is warm this time! Honestly, chakra depletion of all things!"

"Yes, beautiful."

"Shikadai, are you all-"

"That was a youthful effort-"

"We have to get-"

"Where could they have-"

"Daddy?" Instantly, the room fell silent as Motoko walked into the room from the office, dragging Mirai by the hand. Tapping Guy Mom's shoulder, Taka gestured to the armchair at Dad's feet. After he was situated, he opened his arms to Motoko.

"Come here, Momo." The little four-year-old was hesitant, as if she was walking on lava as she approached her big brother. _I must look like hell._

"Taka?" She blinked at him with her big, beautiful, innocent purple eyes. Lifting her from her armpits, he plopped her on his good knee only to look down to find Beni at his feet. _Man, what a drag. The life of a big brother never ends._ He lifted Beni up too, before sighing some more. Troublesome.

"Ok, girls, I've got a very important mission so listen very carefully." Taka started, pausing so that they were both looking at him before continuing.

"Mom, Mira and Ruto have gotten themselves into some trouble and Dad used a lot of chakra so that we could go save them."

"Is that why Daddy's sleeping?"

"Yep, Daddy messed with sealing again."

"But Daddy's not allowed to mess with sealing."

"That's what I told him!"

"Girls." He coughed, gaining their attention. "You're right, Motoko. Dad's not allowed to mess with sealing so now he's hurt because he didn't listen to Mom. But don't worry!" Taka added quickly as worry-filled tears started to leak from Motoko. "He's going to be just fine! He just needs to rest and I want you two make sure that he's comfortable while he's resting. So that means no more fuinjutsu or sword welding, Beni."

"Awh!"

"Unless you are attacked, in which case, raise hell."

"Kay!"

"What about me, Taka?"

"You," He pinch Motoko's nose. "Little Fawn, are to listen to the adults here and make sure you keep yourself out of trouble. Maybe help Miss Temari clean up the house a little or play with Mirai. Just make sure you let Dad rest."

"Do I have to listen to Other Daddy and Guy Mommy?" _Dang, like sister, like sister._

"Especially them." Great, now he sounded even more like Dad than normal. Troublesome.

"Can I take a nap with Daddy?" Taka hated how his youngest sister's face felling when he shook his head.

"Not today, Momo, but definitely next time, okay?"

"Okay." Both girls answered before tackling him in a life-ending bear hug. Which he gave back just as good as he got. Taka quickly pecked both of their hairlines.

"I love you."

"We love you too." With that, he put his sisters down. _Ok, deep breathes, Taka. You have to do this. You need your legs._

"Aunt-" Come on, Taka, be a man. "Aunt Sakura, can you fix the chakra in my leg?"

Silence.

Said woman had been shielding herself away in shame over her other self's actions. Which she had absolutely no control over what so ever. Sure, he could have asked Aunt Ino to do it but he needed to do this. This world's Sakura was completely different from Psycho Haruno that took him family from him. She didn't deserve any of this and he was going to let her know it.

"You want me to- to heal you? After everything that I've-"

"You haven't done anything." Taka protested. "Ok, so Psycho Haruno is your counterpart. So what? You're still you! One, you're Sarada's mom. Two, you're sane. And three, and most importantly, you still care! You still care and feel guilty over actions that you didn't commit and that's more than that bitch has ever done! So please, Aunt Sakura, can you heal my chakra for me so I can fix my leg and kick ass again?"

"Naruto, I don't care what anyone says. He is _so_ your son that it's terrifying." Aunt Sakura smiled for the first time in what, two days, maybe, before she knelt next to his bad leg as everyone started to crowd around them.

"How close were we?" The woman asked softly as her green chakra covered his shin. "Before the incident."

"You were my godmother. You taught me everything I could know about the human body so that my healing seals would work better." So yeah, it really fucking sucked when Psycho Haruno hurt Sarada.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be troublesome. It's not your fault. Now I know why Dad tells me to stop apologizing about everything. It's annoying."

"Hm, cheeky little brat, aren't you?" She teased. He smiled. It was good to have his godmother back.

"So now what?" Dammit, Inojin, read the mood.

"We need to find them and fast." Sarada noted, checking the time. "Sunset's soon."

"And the full moon is about to rise." Uncle Sasuke finished. Guy Mom nodded before he started pacing again.

"So, what do we know?"

"The Lady Hokage, Shikamira Nara Uzumaki, and Boruto Uzumaki have been kidnapped by Psycho Haruno as Takashi eloquently has dubbed her and Zetsu." Uncle Kakashi summarized.

"How the hell did Zetsu get out from the seal, anyway?" Uncle Kiba asked, Akamaru barking in agreement.

"No clue, but we'll worry about that later. What else?" Guy Mom pressed. That's when Other Dad got that face. You know, the one when your brain goes into overdrive and everything in the picture starts connecting.

"Pregnancies, that's it!"

"Eh, do I have to look you over too, Shikamaru?" Aunt Ino questioned. Other Dad swatted her hand away that was reaching for his forehead.

"No, listen, I know why they wanted the Lady Hokage. Takashi," Taka looked up at Other Dad. "Do you know why your mother's seal maybe weaker than Naruto's?" Taka though about it for a second before face palming. Stupid, it was so obvious.

"Guy Mom, can I see you seal for a second?" Guy Mom didn't even look embarrassed, over his new title or the fact he had to raise his shirt up. Yep, just what he thought.

"Mom's seals different than that." Taka concluded as Guy Mom dropped his shirt. "Guy Mom's seal is specifically made to keep whatever is in him, in him. No matter what. Mom probably had the same seal on her too but had to change it so that she could give birth to us without trouble from her seal and Kurama. And Psycho Haruno was Mom's midwife during all of her pregnancies."

"So she would know about the weaker seal." Aunt Hinata connected.

"It's all making sense now." Other Dad said.

"Um, how?" Aunt Ino asked.

"Think about it. They need two things to resurrect Kaguya. A new body for Kaguya."

"Mira." Thanks for the reminder, Chocho.

"And large source of chakra to resurrect her with, the Lady Hokage. The Kaguya in your world, Takashi, was never awakened in the first place but this world's probably just needs Kurama level chakra in order to get out. And it would be easier getting Kurama out of the Lady Hokage than to get him from Naruto."

"What about Boruto though?" Aunt Hinata asked. "Why do they need him?"

"His eye can help Zetsu find the exact location where we sealed them away." Uncle Sasuke noted. "It can locate specific bodies of chakra, even ones the byakugan can't see. That's why they need him."

"Dammit, it'll take days to get for all of us to get there." Guy Mom noted, punching the wall.

"Oi!"

"Sorry, Temari."

"Actually, Taka and I can get us there." Everyone turned to look at Dai, including Taka, who had been busy healing his leg now that chakra could go through it.

"Huh, we can?" You'd have to excuse Taka's brain, it was currently running on fumes.

"Dude, your dad said it himself. Your seal is the reason we got into this mess in the first place. If you do the seal and I put my yin chakra through it-"

"You could shadow travel us wherever we need to go! Dai, you're a genius!"

"Thanks." With that, Guy Mom gave a huge Uzumaki smile.

"Alright, Kakashi, you need to stay here and protect the village. Sasuke-"

"No."

"Right, you're with me then. Shikamaru-"

"Someone has to make sure you don't kill yourself or destroy the world."

"Your vote of confidence is very touching, Shikamaru." Damn, that was such a Mom and Dad conversation that it was actually comforting. "Sakura-"

"That bitch is mine!"

"Great, boys, get that seal ready! Everyone else, stay on guard! That stupid alien thingy is going down!"

"Stupid alien thingy?"

"Shut up, Shikamaru!" Yep, just like Mom and Dad.

 **Author's Note - Finally, this chapter is over. This story will be the death of me, I swear. Well, what do you guys think? Do you like where everything is headed? Do you like the fight scenes? Do have any thoughts, comments, expostulations? Remember to review, favorite and follow! Also, we've passed the 100 favorites and we're rapidly approach 150 followers! Not to mention over 75 comments! Man, you guys rock! I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	16. Kurama, The Delivery Fox

**Author's Note- Ugh, guys, this chapter was a beast to write! Lord have mercy, I swear it almost killed me! But for you, my amazing readers, I forged ahead and finished this beauty! Right, enough being dramatic, Winthrop, finish up this author's note. First off, the first POV in this chapter is plot while the second POV is half-filler/half-tying up lose ends. However, the fillery half is a necessary evil so yeah... You guys have been warned. Second, the Naruto that we all know and love is, when you think about it, is a pretty chill dude. Think about it. Crazy shit happens to the man and he takes it in stride. Sure, he has his freak out session and crazy antics but you have to give Naruto credit when credit is due. With this in mind, this should example Naruto's, shall we say, acceptance with 2.0 fam. Third, I've given you guys a hint in the chapter title and let me tell you, I've had that scene in my head for ages and I'll be damned if I didn't put it in this story! Besides, it fit. Ok, this author's note is getting too long. On to the story!**

Chapter 16: Kurama, The Delivery Fox

 _Boruto_

"He is so dead the next time I see him! I'm going to string him up the yin-yang from the Hokage Heads, cover him in orange paint-"

Shikamira's plans to commit fratricide caused Boruto to inch slowly away from the girl. Which was kind of hard to do when they were in still trapped in the slug's belly. Did he mention that they were also defying the laws of gravity by floating in said belly? No, he didn't, well never mind. Totally not the point. But damn could Mira be scary when she wanted to be.

"Mira, don't you think that's a little overkill?"

"Overkill?! Not if Taka's still wearing clothes when I do this… Actually, Ruto, that's a great idea!" _Oops, sorry Taka_. All jokes aside, Boruto was worried. And grossed out given their current cage (thankfully, they were not sitting against the slimy lining). But mostly worried.

Physically Boruto felt fine. Better than fine, actually. However, he was pretty sure, if his memory served him right, that Psycho Haruno, as Mira dubbed her, had punch the living shit out of him. Which would explain why he didn't know how he woke up floating next to Mira in a stomach. Mira looked all healed up too. This begs the question, why were they all healed up? Also, how the fuck do they get out of, wherever here was?

"Great questions, Ruto." _Great, thinking out loud. Again._ "Sadly, if I knew the answers to those questions, we'd have bailed already." Mira threw herself back in exasperation, her arms pillowing her head. "What a drag…"

"Well, we can't just stay here." Boruto protested, sit/floating with his legs crossed as he watched the girl back float. "Can't you do something with your shadow to get us out of here?"

"I'd love to." Great then why- "But I can't. This place is messing with my chakra. It feels like mini dams are blocking every chakra point." She then flicked her wrist, before glaring at her hand like it had personally offended her. "See, I can't even unseal my katanas and Taka did the sealing to make sure that I, Miss Shit at Sealing, could _always_ unseal them." He raised an eyebrow at her, remembering the fuss Beni had put up when she learned that his family didn't know anything about sealing.

"You're bad at sealing?"

"Pathetically so. Dad and I have been banned from doing any time of sealing higher than a Level 2. Even us performing a Level 3 seal would be pushing it."

"Why?" Boruto could feel his curiosity peaking as the girl sat up, scratching the back of her head bashfully. And yet another Uzumaki trait that they all shared. The bashful head scratch.

"I've got too much yin chakra. Sealing in nearly every form is yang chakra and a lot of it. I also have the creativity of a teaspoon."

"A teaspoon?"

"Taka's words, not mine. I know the foundation and history of sealing. Hell, I could probably look at seal and tell you what it's supposed to do. I just can't do the sealing itself. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah." That's when Boruto looked down at the little diamond seal on his right palm. The one that appeared after he killed Momoshiki Otsutsuki. In all honesty, everything that had happened in the past five days (fuck, had it really only been five days?) had made Boruto forget about the stupid thing. And given what Mira just told him…

"Here." He thrusted his hand towards her. She blinked her sapphires eyes at him.

"Eh?!" She pulled the palm closer to her face, the inspection commencing. "How long have you had this thing for?!"

"Since the Chunin Exams." Boruto explained as she turned his hand over and then back again. "Long story short, I helped Dad kill the alien that interrupted our exams, Momoshiki and the next thing I know, this thing was there." Her eyes narrowed dramatically.

"Arrogant, looked like a Princess, wet himself the moment he actually fought against someone stronger than him?" Boruto blinked.

"You know him?" That when Mira shifted slightly so that more of her back was facing him. Using her free hand, she pulled back the collar of her halter top slightly. There it was on the back of her neck.

Of course, she had one… Stupid multiply dimensional universes…

"You could say that." Mira readjusted herself. "Have you activated your seal before?"

"Once." He winced. "It made me pass out after-"

"You absorbed some ninjutsu?"

"Yep." Mira shook her head in disbelief but there was a soft smile on her lips.

"Yeah, me too. Mom and Taka have a theory of what it supposed to be, though."

"Which is?"

"This seal is supposed to absorb ninjutsu when activated but Mom thinks that after we absorb the ninjutsu, we're supposed to send the ninjutsu back at our opponent." That was news to Boruto.

"Really? Kind of like redirecting the attack?"

"Not just redirecting the attack. Amplifying the power of the ninjutsu with our own chakra. Since we never released the ninjutsu-"

"We passed out." Boruto realized.

"Bingo."

"Dang." He looked back at his palm, curling and uncurling it. His right eye twitched before his vision blurred. As it cleared, he looked around. He could see the navy-blue, almost purple chakra lines that surrounded their cell. It was pulsing and churning.

"Boruto." The concern in her voice made him look back at Mira, only to blink back in shock. Her chakra, her energy, looked like an eclipse. Pitch black with white lining leaking out before mixing in with a blacker outline. It hovered over her, almost like a veil. He looked at her closer, causing Mira to leaning back slightly with a disturbed look on her face.

"Dude, we're related now-"

"What? No! I wasn't going to kiss you!" Ugh, gross! He gripped her shoulders, pulling her shoulders straight again. He watched as her chakra veil did nothing under his hands. It almost was like it wasn't there, expect it was. Boruto was certain out it. "I see something."

"Like what?"

He glanced back at the purply chakra lines. While they lined the stomach, some lines seemed to be stretching out, only to stop inches from Mira's veil. None of the lines were going after him, which he was slightly insulted by. Who wouldn't want a piece of him?

Sorry, got off track again. That's when Boruto noticed how her veil lightly rested in certain spots over her body. Mira's tenketsu system. All 361 of them. Note to self, remember to thank Mom and Aunt Hanabi for forcing him to remember _all_ of the points of a person's tenketsu system. The veil seemed to be protecting her, like it didn't want the purply chakra lines to -

Boruto started to open his mouth when their cage lurched. The pair slammed into each other as the walls contracted and waggled. _Oh no_! With wide eyed looks of horror, Boruto and Mira paled violently as they were upchucked. And yes, it was just as disgusting as it sounds.

"Ow!" Boruto cursed as his back slammed only to get the wind completely knocked out of him when Mira's butt crashed land onto his stomach. His luck really, really sucked sometimes.

As Mira moved off of him, whispering sorry as she slid, Boruto took in his surroundings. Rocks, lots and lots of rocks surrounded them. There wasn't a tree in sight. _Well Toto, we're not in Konoha anymore._ They were at the bottom of a valley, the rising full moon clear for all to see. There was the sound of a summons disappearing as smoke took its place.

"It didn't work." A deep voice said, sending shivers down Boruto's spine.

"Fucking Naras and their fucking chakra." Great, she was still there. Boruto glared at the newest member of his 'I'm Going to Kick Your Ass' list as the smoke parted. Next to Psycho Haruno was a man that look like one of those toy soldiers, expect in black and gray instead of green.

"Now dear, no need to be crude-"

"Oh, piss off, Zetsu-"

"Kids!" Boruto rolled over to his left side to see Dad Mom. She was seated in a giant wooden bird cage, her arms pinned to her back. Her eyes searched their bodies for wounds. How she got kidnapped? To hell if Boruto knew but that so was not important right now.

"Mom!" Mira jumped up, with Boruto right behind her, ready to run to Dad Mom, when Psycho Haruno slammed her hands on their heads.

"Eck!"

"Hiss!" She drew them against her chest by their hair, resting her chin in between their shoulders.

"Now, now, kiddies. There's no need to go running to Mommy. We're going to have a little savagery hunt." Psycho Haruno cooed before looking up at her former teammate. "Don't worry, Naruto. I'll take _great_ care of them."

The glare that Dad Mom sent Psycho Haruno would have scared the piss out of any man. Sadly, Psycho Haruno wasn't a man. (Well, actually, you can never be too sure nowadays. However, we'll just say that she's a she and a crazy psycho bitch and leave it at that.)

"Hurt them and die!"

"Hurt them, oh no!" Psycho Haruno mocked. "I would _never_ do such a thing." Psycho Haruno released their hair, only to lock her arms around their necks. Boruto winced and glanced, catching the woman's crossed fingers. Dad Mom growled before they were turned away from her. Psycho Haruno pushed them. Stumbling, he glanced back at the madwoman.

"Start walking, brats." Geeze, pushy much?

Boruto adjusted his jacket as they marched forward. Zetsu, the weird blob man, took point. Mira and Boruto walked side by side as Psycho Haruno took up the rear, carrying the caged Dad Mom.

He'll confess, he did think about trying to escape for like a nanosecond before scolding himself. For one, he'd get caught. But two, and most importantly, he couldn't abandon Mira and Dad Mom like that. That would be horrible. He'd felt awful and guilty. He'd be scum. Worse than scum. Yep, no, not happening. That didn't mean that he wasn't going to get answers though. Ah hell to the no.

"Who are you, anyway? No Name's long-lost brother?" Boruto called out, getting Zetsu's attention. Mira looked like she was about to say something when Boruto faked himself tripping slightly. He bumped into her, his fingers quickly and lightly tapped out a Morse code of 'wait' into her hip.

"You've never heard of me? Surely your father has told you about me." Boruto faked a face of hatred.

"Clearly you don't know me. I stopped listening to my idiot of a dad a long time ago." These were lies now, but he had to make this believable. "So, who are you? Or what are you? Or both?"

"Well you have your father's mouth and brain." Zetsu gained a tic mark. "I controlled the leader of the Akatsuki. I made Madara control the Kyuubi when it attacked your village, all those years ago. I was the one who started the Fourth Shinobi World War to resurrect Kaguya, the mother of chakra. I have had a hand in every major event in the history of shinobi. I am Zetsu, son of Kaguya, and my mother will rise again."

"Nope, still nothing." Which was another lie. Boruto knew exactly who this guy was. Boruto was using the Uzumaki stereotypes to his advantage right now. Play dumb, say stupid shit, get the enemy so annoyed that they start to explain their _oh so evil_ master plan. Works every time.

"The Akatsuki's plant, spy thingy." Mira supplied helpfully. He glanced out of his peripheral to catch her sly smirk. Man, she catches on quickly.

"Oh, you're him!" Boruto cupped his fist into his palm. "So, what are you doing here?"

"To resurrect Kaguya, you fool!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get that." Man, someone was touchy. "I meant, didn't you get sealed away or something? How'd you escape?"

"There was a crack in the veil between the dimensions during the Chunin Exams. I was able to slip through. Sadly, I fell into the wrong world." _Chunin Exams, why is it always the Chunin Exam?_

"Wrong world?" The kids parroted.

"Then how did you get here?" Mira questioned, crossing her arms. "You're not Fertile with Yin."

"Child, I am yin in its purest form."

"Yeah right." The Nara heiress snorted. Another tic mark appeared.

"Don't kill Mother's new body, Zetsu. That would be impractical, Zetsu." The blob muttered to himself before shaking his head and sending a glare at them over his shoulder.

"We followed your parents here, Shikamira." Psycho Haruno interrupted. Boruto glanced back to see Dad Mom's frowning face as Psycho Haruno grinned up at her.

"We would have followed you and your siblings here but we need your mother for the Kyuubi's chakra. When your parents activated their seal, Zetsu was able to use the leftover seal to get us here. It took us a day but oh well, we made it on time."

"What do you need her for?" Boruto asked, his curiosity getting the better of him. He threw his thumb back at Dad Mom. "I get you want Mira for her body, you perv."

"Why you little-"

"And you think my eye can help you find Kaguya for some stupid reason. I don't even know when it's working half the time. But did you really need to kidnap Dad Mom too? I mean, why go through the trouble of getting another Kurama chakra source when Dad's already here?" That's when Psycho Haruno snorted.

"Wow, you don't know jackshit about sealing, do you?" Hey, give him a break, he was working on that! "The Reaper Death Seal was a nasty piece of work. Two Four Symbol Seals overlapped onto each other to create the Eight Sign Seal. Well that locked away the Kyuubi for good, practically. It's not impossible to get the Kyuubi out of its jailer, mind you, but why bother struggling to get the Kyuubi's chakra from her male counterpart when Naruto made it so accessible for us. Right, Naruto?" Dad Mom remained silent as Psycho Haruno continued.

"Naruto had to change her seal to be a Four Symbol Seal when she found out that she was pregnant with you and your brother, Shikamira. It was to ensure your safe delivery into this world. Without the change, we probably wouldn't have been able to get you out, especially if we had to perform a cesarean, which was highly likely since she was pregnant with twins. The Kyuubi's chakra wouldn't allow it and would've kept healing Naruto's body up during the labor. Even through a vaginal birth and the Kyuubi being on good terms with your mother, the chance of us being unable to deliver you two because of that seal was high. Besides, it wasn't like changing the seal was going to reenact the events of Naruto's birth. In short, while changing the Eight Sign Seal to a Four Symbol Seal made your births easier, it also made it easier to take the Kyuubi."

"Which is why we need your mother. My thanks, Lady Hokage." Zetsu added at the end before entering another valley. This valley was looked like it could hold three Konohas and still have room. As Boruto peered down into the valley from his spot on the edge, he processed the information he just received.

His first thought was, naturally, ew… TMI much… His stupid brain's first thought when he heard about Dad Mom going through labor and delivery was to replace her with his father and yeah, we're going to end that train of thought right there.

Moving on, it was starting to make more sense now. Why Mira and her family popped out of Shikadai's backyard when they did. Why it seemed like they had been a part of the Konoha family all along earlier in the week. And why, unfortunately, they were currently hiking through rocky mountain about to be sacrificed to an alien mama with a blob for a son and a psycho for a daughter-in-law.

Boruto nearing leaped out of his shorts at the loud crash noise that Psycho Haruno made from the giant valley. She had leaped over them and landed at the bottom of the valley, shifting the cage so that it took the brunt of the landing. Boruto wrapped his arms around Mira's waist to stop her from leaping after them.

"MOM!"

"I'M OKAY!" Man, do they have lungs or what? It has to be genetic. Boruto didn't have time to react when he felt himself being thrown over one shoulder, Mira over the other before Zetsu jumped.

"AHHHHHH!" See, genetic.

Before they knew it, Boruto and Mira found themselves tucked away in their wooden own cage, curtesy of Zetsu. Dad Mom's cage was placed in front and slightly to the side of theirs. And since she was all tied up, Dad Mom couldn't turn to face them. Zetsu and Psycho Haruno were away from them, discussing their master plan. Mira glared at them and flicked her wrist again.

"Dammit. What's wrong with my chakra?" Her voice was in whisper. "I can't do anything."

"It sealed itself away." Mira looked at him in shook. He pointed to his right eye, which was back to normal, for now at least. "I saw it while we were in the stomach. Psycho Haruno's slug was trying to drain your chakra while you were in there. Somehow, your chakra made a veil of some sorts and plugged up all of your tenketsu points. That's why you can't do anything."

"That's what you were looking at early?"

"Yep." Boruto looked over at their wardens. They looked like they were arguing over something and kept glancing back at the moon. "Want me to unblock them?" If anything, Mira's eyes grew wider.

"You can do – of course you know the Gentle Fist, you're Aunt Hinata's kid."

"I know the basics and where the points are. I couldn't do this during battle so hold still and tell me when they look over. This is going to hurt though."

"I can take it. Do it."

The following passing minutes were tense as Boruto did his best to open Mira's tenketsu back up again. Boruto did not have the Byakugan, obviously. And while Boruto knew where the points were, he definitely missed a few (ok, a lot) of them. Mira took it though, all the while watching out encase Zetsu or Psycho Haruno caught on to what they were doing.

"That's the best I can do." Boruto confessed as Mira reclined herself back against his chest, wincing. Had it been any other girl (sans Hima, obviously), he'd be blushing like his mom that time he walked in on her and Dad doing the dirty.

Gah, bad thoughts, Boruto, bad thoughts.

Back to the main point, he had no problem with Mira using him as a chair. Huh, so this is what it's like to have a sister who was his age? Eh, he could get used to this.

"I'm sorry." Mira shook her head at his apology, sending him a quick smile.

"Nah, you did good, Boruto. You got a lot of them." She raised an eyebrow. "How's your chakra?"

"Fine. Really good actually. I'm pretty sure that the slug just wanted your chakra and ignored me."

"Well, that's just plain rude."

"I know, right!" Ah, sarcasm, how we've missed you. Boruto glanced at Dad Mom, who hadn't moved from her spot at all. Granted, the way her cage had her all chained up so that she couldn't move or turn around didn't help at all. Still, she seemed perfectly still, almost like a statue.

"Is she okay?" Boruto asked, bobbing his head towards Dad Mom. Mira shrugged.

"I think so… Maybe. It kind of looks like she's meditating right now." Mira glanced over at their capturers who were at each other's throats over something.

"Mom? Psh, Mom?" Mira called out in a whisper. Dad Mom didn't even wiggle. "Yep, she's gone."

"She could hear that from this far away?" Mira nodded.

"Mom's got great hearing. Taka and I can't plan any pranks if she's at home. That's why we do them at Sarada's house."

"Oh, good to know, Honey." Boruto snickered at Mira's 'You've got to be kidding me' face when Dad Mom called back to them. "Remind me to kick Sasuke's ass when we get home, Shikamira. He knew about all of your pranks and never told me, that bastard!"

"Mom, seriously, that's what you're upset about right now?" Mira grumbled, face palming. "What a drag."

That's when Dad Mom started fighting against her wooden chains. Boruto nudged Mira, as they looked back at the mother. Mira gasped lightly, drawing Boruto's attention to her line of sight. As Dad Mom wiggled, her locked arms behind her back stayed in their line of sight. The woman started signing in with hand symbols that Boruto had never seen before. They were quick, one right after another with little to no pauses in between.

"Mom, you're a genius." Mira whispered, before a wicked gleam entered her eyes. "Oi, Ruto, do you still have the Kote on you?" That's when Boruto let out an Uzumaki grin of his own.

"Always."

"Well, take the brat out then and use him!" Psycho Haruno's yelling snapped them back to attention when Boruto felt tug on the back of his jacket.

"Holy shit!" Boruto yelped as he was pulled upward by a wooden claw, kind of like those you see in those stuffed animals' machines at restaurants.

"Boruto!" Mira screamed in horror as their cage opened up at the highest point. The claw dangled him, now at least 20 feet in the air. _Don't look down, don't look down._

Rip. Great, his jacket was starting to rip. Fan-fucking-tastic. Luckily, or unluckily for him, the claw decided to readjust its grip on him, holding him like it was about to throw him.

Wait, what?!

"GOODBYE SWEET WORLD!" This is the end, Boruto thought as he flew towards the earth. He closed his eyes. Goodbye, Mom, kiss Hima goodbye for him.

"AHHHH!"

"Kid, shut up." Boruto opened his eyes and blinked.

Huh, he was still alive? Sweet! And he was tucked into Psycho Haruno's side with her holding him like he was a bag of sugar. Not sweet.

"Put him down, Sakura." Zetsu ordered. Naturally, she let him go. Ow! Boruto rubbed his sore ass, glaring back at the woman who shooed him towards Mr. Blob. Well then. Boruto decided to pull a Shikadai and slump, lazily shuffling his feet as he dragged himself over to Zetsu. The man/blob/thing was unamused when Boruto reached him and yawned.

"Sup." He heard a snort behind him and could practically feel Mira's smirk that she was directing towards him. Zetsu stare harshly back at him before glancing at Psycho Sakura.

"You sure you grabbed the right blonde?"

"Of course, I did!" Psycho Haruno actually sounded offended at her husband accusation. "It has whisker marks." It! Excuse you, Boruto was a he, thank you very much.

"Ah, yes, you're right." Zetsu ignored his wife's grumbling to glowered down at Boruto. "Activate it."

"Nope." Boruto emphasized the 'p' for shits and giggles. Mr. Blob raised an eyebrow at his sass.

"And why not?"

"I can't control it. Duh." Oh, would you look at that? There were sharp, pointy pieces of wood aim at him. Wonderful.

"Activate it or die." Geeze, bipolar much.

"What's the magic word?"

"Now, you little shit." Just as he was about to become Swiss cheese, Boruto heard a cough behind him and then snapping fingers. His right eye felt warm as chakra ran through it. Instantly, his vision shifted over. The purply chakra lines were back, lining the entire valley from the walls to the ground below him. It kind of reminded Boruto of a spider's web. A giant spider web, but a web, nonetheless.

"You couldn't have done that sooner?" Zetsu was not amused.

"You didn't ask." Psycho Haruno shrugged as she pushed the spikes away from Boruto's left side. His skin crawled as her hand clamped down on the back of his neck. He looked up to glare at her when she forced him to look back out into the valley.

"What do you see, kid? Time's a wasting."

"Why should I tell you anything, you crazy-"

"Boruto!" Dad Mom's voice caused him to bite back the rest of his sentence. He was able to glance back at her. She shook her head. "Do as they say, Boruto. It's ok."

No, it wasn't ok, Boruto wanted to yell back. This whole situation wasn't ok! He wanted to scream and cry because dammit, he didn't want to help these guys! He'd rather die than help these guys in anyway. And he felt guilty. He felt guilty that he never apologized to Dad for his behavior for the past, well, God, it must have been five years now. He felt guilty that he let himself, Mira and Dad Mom get into this situation in the first place and scolded himself for not training harder, for not learning more about his Uzumaki heritage, for being so stubborn and cocky. He felt guilty that he couldn't do anything. God, he was pathetic. But Boruto did as he was told, for once. It wasn't like he had a choice anyway.

"Listen to your mommy, kid."

"It's Dad Mom. Get it right." Boruto corrected as he inspected the web of chakra. "What am I looking for, anyway?"

"Where is the most concentrated source of chakra?" Zetsu asked. Unwillingly, Boruto looked out again before his eye zoomed in on an area off to his right side. About 50 yards away was a large, concentrated pile of chakra lines. It was pulsing and stank of evil mojo. Well, that had to be what they were looking for. He pointed to it.

"Over there. About 50 yards to the right of us. You can't miss it."

The madwoman's hand latched out to his neck again, making him gulp. She gave him a crazed smile.

"After you."

The chakra leaking out of the ground was suffocating Boruto with every step he took as they approach the heart of the web. Boruto's fight or flight senses were tell him to 'get the hell out of dodge before you die, you idiot!' There was something seriously evil buried under his feet and he didn't want to find out what it was. He was about to take another step forward when Psycho Haruno pulled him backwards and moved herself in front of him. He blinked. Was she… trying to protect him? The hand she had on his shoulder pushed him down so that he stumbled backwards onto his butt. Ok, maybe not…

"Stay here, brat. You've done your part." Boruto watched around Psycho Haruno's body as Zetsu walked to the concentrated zone. At his feet, the chakra lines churned and pulsed before the earth opened up at his feet. A hole full purply chakra sent waves of killing intent through the valley. Zetsu reached into the middle of it, his arm sinking up to his shoulder into the hole as he knelt before it. He was searching for something, Boruto realized before Zetsu smiled.

"There it is." And he pulled.

The earth rumbled as the chakra lines pulsed. _What is that thing?_ The hole expanded as Zetsu pulled up iron chains. The alien jumped up, the chains clanking as they heaved up gated doors. They were the size of Konoha's main gate. The door on the left was snow white with the kanji for yang (陽) carved into it. The door on the right was pitch black with the kanji for yin (陰). Both doors were bound shut by chains. In the center of doors was a lock where the chains sprouted out from. On the lock was the kanji for heaven (天国). The earth closed as the gates hovered a few feet off of the ground. More purple chakra leaked out. It was suffocating.

"Woah…"

"So that's what she was sealed away with. Sixth Path Planetary Devastation." Boruto couldn't tear his eyes away from the doors to look back at mother and daughter.

Boruto moved to his feet as his eye locked on the yin door. Under its carved kanji, he could make out small cracks in the metallic material of the door. Not completely broken but slightly shattered, kind of like breaking a window but all of the pieces remaining in the window frame. _Is that where Zetsu broke lose?_

"At last." Smirking, Zetsu raised his arms to the gate. "You will live again, Mother." He turned his head up at the moon. It was almost directly above them. They were running out of time.

"Throw the brat back into the cage." Zetsu turned to stare down Dad Mom. "Shall we begin, Lady Hokage?"

 _The Lord Hokage_

"Ok, come on, Dai. Let's go to the backyard."

Naruto waited until Takashi and Shikadai left the house, the other genin following them before he turned to his shinobi. They were all tense and itching to fight. But no matter how much Naruto wanted to take all of them with him to face Zetsu, he couldn't.

Naruto had matured _a lot_ since his genin days. They couldn't all race out of the village. The village couldn't afford it and as the Hokage, he couldn't afford the risk. The possibility of Kaguya's return meant that the village needed to be prepared for war.

 _Again_.

Naruto sighed before straightening up from his slouch against the wall, his gaze firming up. The war veterans stood at attention, waiting for their Hokage's orders.

"Lee, Kiba, Sai, I want the village to be put on high alert. Any and all shinobi ranked chunin and higher are to prepare as if we are to be invaded. This includes the retired shinobi. All Jonin senseis are to inform their squads of the development. The Genin are to remain in the village with orders to protect the civilians should anything happen. No one moves unless order to by myself or Kakashi. Dismissed."

"Sir." The three dashed off, leaving smoking trails behind them. Naruto turned to his wife.

"Hinata, you, Ino and Karui are to prepare the hospital. Hopefully we won't need it but…" It felt weird, ordering his wife around. Luckily, Hinata was the greatest woman he knew and she knew that this wasn't the place or time to argue. She sent him a loving smile as she bowed.

"Lord Hokage." He sent her his own smile before her and Karui leapt out of the window. Ino checked over Not Shika one more time.

"He should be fine. Whatever seal Taka used on him saved his life for sure." Ino's declaration caused surprised looks from everyone except Sakura, who nodded in agreement at her best friend's assessment.

"How low were his reserves before the seal kicked in?" Sakura asked, causing Ino to snort.

"You mean before or after he started to go into cardiac arrest?"

"Cardiac arrest? But that means he used at least 75 percent of his chakra in one go!"

"He actually used 94 percent of his chakra to get us out, Temari." Ino corrected as everyone looked at the sleeping commander in disbelief. "I don't know anything about sealing but judging by the kids' reaction when this idiot," She waved at Not Shika. "told them how he was going to get us out, he damn well knew that he could have died. Let me put it into perspective for you on just how stupid and dangerous his stunt was. He somehow performed his own version of opening the Eight Gates in one go."

 _Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two._ Those words repeated themselves over and over again as Naruto took in the glow of orange chakra that leaked from the seal over Not Shika's heart. In that moment, Naruto's will strengthened. This had become personal.

Ok, so it was already personal before but that was beside the point. Zetsu and Psycho Haruno had attacked his family and no one did that and got away with it. Failure was not an option. Naruto would personally see to it that everyone was saved (especially his son) and that the Nara Uzumakis were reunited and returned to their home safe and sound.

"Impressive." Kakashi whistled before Shikamaru looked up from his cigarette.

"Choji, Temari." He puffed out smoke. "Make sure the house doesn't become more screwed up than it already is." Which was Shika Speak for 'Take care of everybody, especially Other Me and his girls'. "I need to grab some stuff out of the office."

"You should go talk to him." Naruto swiveled around to face Temari, her gaze locked on the door that Shikamaru left through. Temari shrugged at his confused gazed. "He's moody and tense again. He won't be able to think clearly like at and then we will all be screwed. Go fix your work husband, Naruto."

"He's not my work husband. And why is he the husband?" At the deadpanned stares that he received, Naruto groaned. "Yeah, yeah, I know why. I hate you all, by the way."

"Hn."

"Fuck you too, Sasuke. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go die from embarrassment. Call me when the seal is ready."

"Make sure to leave the door open!" Temari was having way too much fun with all of this now.

The office door creaked as Naruto pushed it open. Shikamaru didn't even acknowledge him as he continued to stare out the window. Resting on his desk was a fur pelt. Shikamaru was leaning against the desk, flicking his lighter on and off.

"I'm surprised you're not smoking." Naruto went around the desk to leaning against it too. Man, the Nara forest had taken a real beating from all of the attacks. Shikamaru shrugged.

"I ran out."

"Ah." The men fell to complete silence until-

"So, I'm your type, huh?" Naruto poked Shikamaru's shoulder. The shadow user flicked him the bird but had a small, barely there smile on his lips. Hah! Mission Make Shika Laugh: Success!

As his acceptance over this whole alternate dimension situation grew, Naruto's levels of embarrassment and horror were diminishing. Was the situation still shocking? Yes. Embarrassing? Hell yeah. Had it changed how he would look at Shikamaru for the rest of his life? Um, possibly, depending on how this conversation went.

The thing that terrified Naruto the most was that he could understand why his girl self had chosen her Shikamaru. Now, don't get Naruto wrong, he still loved Hinata more than anything in the world and no, you will not be finding him and Shikamaru doing anything close to romantic anytime soon.

 _ **You sure about that?**_ Piss off, Kurama!

Back to his brilliant point before he was so rudely interrupted, he could see it. He could see why Uzumaki wanted someone like Shikamaru. While Shikamaru growing up was lazy, blunt, and had a weird obsession for all things napping, Shogi and cloud watching, (and none of that had changed as he got older) he was also a loyal genius who did everything in his power to protect the ones that he loved. Once you gain Shikamaru's attention, you were stuck with him.

There was a saying in Konoha. There is nothing to fear except fear itself. That, and a motivated Nara. Asuma-Sensei's death had been Shikamaru's motivation in this world to become the shinobi that he was today. In the other dimension, Shikamaru's motivation had been an orphaned blonde girl who just wanted a friend and to be loved. In short, Naruto could see it and had come to accept it.

Now he just had to get Shikamaru back to normal (ish) because there was no way in hell that they could run the village if they couldn't look each other in the eye, let alone talk to each other. Besides, Naruto kind of liked the fact that he had more kids now, even if they were from a different world and called him Guy Mom. He always wanted a big family.

"Well, you are blonde and troublesome. Two out of the three aren't too bad." Naruto smiled at the drawled-out, teasing words from his advisor. Yeah, they would be alright again.

"Two out of the three? What's the third?"

"Curvy, which you are not."

"Excuse you! I'll have you know that I have an amazing ass!" Shikamaru snorted before full on laughing.

"You're an idiot."

"But I'm your idiot. Who just happens to have an amazing ass."

 _ **Should Hinata be worried? You're laying it on a little thick there, Naruto.**_ Shut up, Kurama. No one asked for your opinion. And stopping wagging your eyebrows!

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." Shikamaru teased before his face turned serious again. "We don't have that much time left."

"I know." The blonde Kage stood, walking closer to the window. He could make out Takashi as he drew chakra lines of kanji into the earth. Shikadai followed after him, measuring the spacing between the kanji. "You know, when this is all over, I think we need to do a lot of investigating."

"Such as?" His advisor raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I have to learn more about my family, for one thing." Naruto started listing. "Hinata won't stop until we're certain that the Ichiro from their dimension exists here so that means another trip to Suna. And it seems like your family's got some tricks up its sleeves."

"Yeah, tricks. What a drag." Shikamaru reached his hand back. He picked up the fur pelt. He stared at it before folding it against the back of his chair.

"When I was younger, all I really wanted was to be just an average shinobi, making an average living. I'd marry a regular girl who's not super pretty or super ugly. Have two kids, a girl then a boy. Retire when my daughter got married and my son became a successful ninja. And spend the rest of my days just playing shogi. A nice, care free and leisurely retirement. Then I would die of old age before my wife. Yep, that was the life I wanted."

"Has Temari ever heard that speech before? Because I'm pretty sure she'd kick your ass if she heard that."

"Would you look at me now?" Shikamaru continued, completely ignoring him. How rude. "I have everything I never thought I needed." There was a moment of silence when- "I blame you, Naruto."

"Me?! What did I do-"

"Clearly you and other you make it your life's mission to cause me as many headaches as possible. How troublesome."

"But you love it anyway? Eh, right, Shika, you masochist?" Nudge, nudge, nudge.

"Stop, you've got pointy elbows." But Shikamaru was still smiling.

"Come on, Shikamaru! We've got alien ass to kick and our family to protect!" The advisor raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"Our family?"

"Well, there's no denying it now. Might as well embrace it. Let's go save the kiddies, Hubby!"

"Please don't call me that."

"Whatever you say, Work Husband."

"Naruto, you are such an ass." Love you too, Shika, love you too. (Not in that way! Dammit Kiba!)

With a promise of, yes, Naruto, I'm fine and yes, I'll be outside in a minute, Naruto had left the office to track down the other man he had to talk some sense to. Or beat some sense. It really did depend on Sasuke's mood. Luckily for Naruto and his poor fake arm, Sasuke was actually in the mood to talk.

"Hn." Scratch that, in the mood to listen to Naruto's Talk no Jutsu. He had cornered his best friend in the hallway. Naruto was giving him his patented crossed-arms-foot-tap-raised-eyebrow look before deciding that waiting for the Uchiha to actually start talking was pointless.

"You could at least, you know, talk to Sakura. Tell her that you love her and that you don't care that she's got a crazy person as her counterpart. That would make her feel better- Sasuke, are you even listening to me?"

"Hn." He could see what Uzumaki meant about having to create a new language for the Uchiha.

"No, I am not playing personal translator this time. Now go in there," Naruto pointed towards the living room, where Sakura was checking over Not Shika. "and tell your wife-"

"I don't know." He blinked as he watched Sasuke slump against the wall. Holy shit, he actually looked guilty. _Don't tell me…_

"Sasuke," Naruto spoke slowly, waiting for Sasuke's one visible eye to meet his gaze before continuing, "you love Sakura, right?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?! How can you not-" The words stopped when Sasuke raised his only hand.

"I don't know how to love anyone, ok?" _**Hm, totally called it.**_ So not the time, Kurama. "And I'm afraid to love anyone. Everyone I've ever loved is dead and if I let myself get to close, if I let those walls that I put up all those years ago fall-"

Naruto couldn't silent to anymore bullshit so he did the natural thing.

"Ow!" He punched him. "What the hell, Dobe?" Sasuke glared at him but didn't move as Naruto towered over him. Naruto fisted the fabric around Sasuke's neck, pulling him in close to glare even harder at his best friend.

If Naruto was going to be honest with himself, he had let Sasuke off of the hook one too many times. Sure, he had punched some sense into Sasuke more times than he could count. But with this, Sasuke's relationship with his family, Naruto had been lenient with the former avenger. Perhaps it was the ramifications from his teenage years that had Naruto so nonchalant over Sasuke's current actions.

In the older man's efforts to ensure that Naruto was ready to become Hokage, Kakashi had made Naruto almost an assistant Hokage. At the time, Naruto had hated the work that was given to him (Kakashi-Sensei totally Naruto as personal paper signer so that he could reread his smut on the job). However, the work had given Naruto an understanding that he never had as a teenager.

Sasuke had abandon his village and his right to anything within the village. The list of crime after crime after crime at his trial should have killed him, regardless of the fact that he was the last Uchiha or his efforts in the war. His sorry ass was only saved because Naruto and Kakashi pulled nearly every political string that they could with the promise that Sasuke had changed and would stay loyal to Konoha. Sasuke had changed for the better, in the loyal shinobi kind of way. But with romance and human relationships, he was still an emotionally-stunted, constipated idiot. Screw it, this had gone on for too long and Naruto let him have it.

"First off, that's the biggest load of bullshit I've ever heard. Yes, your clan is dead, but newsflash, Sasuke, we are still here, dammit! Team 7 is and will always will be your family so you should thank your sorry duck-butt that we still love your dumbass after all of the shit you put us through! We are still here and we aren't going anywhere!" He dropped the other man, stepping back to glare down harder.

"And second, if you really don't know how you feel about Sakura, then for her and Sarada's sake, you need to figure it out and fast. Hell, you should have done that after the whole Shin Uchiha business. They both deserve better than what you're giving them, you bastard, so either grow a pair or leave."

 _ **I'm impressed, Kit, you actually had the balls to say what everyone's been thinking for the past two decades.**_

 _Again, so not the time, Kurama._

"Tch, like you are the epitome of being a good husband and father." Naruto could feel his eye twitch as he glared harder at the confused man.

"At least I'm trying. Which is a hell of a lot more than you're doing right now." Pivoting, Naruto marched out of the hall.

"Tch, I hate it when you're right, Dobe." Ah, music to his ears.

Sealing, Naruto learned, required a very penmanship. A skill, sadly, he lacked. Ok, he was exaggerating. His handwriting wasn't that bad- Stop rolling your eyes, Shikamaru! Anyway, it turns out that Takashi had superb penmanship, even without using a pen. Etched into the earth was a circle of chakra lines made out of the kanji for the twelve months. In the middle of the circle was the Flying Thunder God Seal. His father's famous seal. However, the seal in the earth seemed slightly different to the one that Naruto examined in Takashi's note book before the Konoha 12 dinner. There were more lines between the kanji for the months.

"Ok, it should be good to go." Takashi swiped the sweat from his brow. "I made some minor changes so that we can locate where we want to land."

"What do you mean?" Sasuke asked as he and Sakura approached the seal. It seems like their own heart to heart went well if how close the pair were standing next to each other were anything to go by. He'll weasel the dets out of Sasuke later.

"Well, we figured that it would probably be a bad idea for us to just activate the seal and hope that we get to where Zetsu's keeping everything." Shikadai started. Takashi nodded in agreement.

"Even though seals are all intent based, it'll be more accurate if we had an exact location or know what the place looks like before we used it. If we just think, take us to Boruto Uzumaki and he's trapped in a barrier-"

"We'd be trapped as well." Shikamaru nodded in understanding. "Good plan, boys."

"Thanks, Dad." The boys said in unison before Takashi looked down with a furious blush. Wide eyed, Shikamaru looked at the dirty blonde. Ah, that's right, Shikamaru had barely spent any time with their- his son from another dimension. Perhaps he was used to Shikamira and Motoko calling him a version of Dad. But Takashi, nope, he definitely wasn't used to it.

"Sorry, Sir." Takashi scratched his head bashfully. "It's a force of habit. You and Dad sound the same. Well, obviously you sound the same. You're the same person. No wonder Mira was worried about calling you Dad-" _**He has your insistent rambling, Naruto.**_ Way to state the obvious, Kurama.

"Takashi." Shikamaru snapped himself out his stupor and gave the Chunin a smile. "It's alright. Now tell us about the changes to the seal."

"Right!" The seal glowed before it projected a holographic sphere. The sphere was staticky before it cleared, zooming into a map of the shinobi world. One dot on the map was yellow over the heart of Konoha. Another dot was in the Land of Lighting.

"Ok, so I telling the seal to show us where we are in comparison to where Boruto is."

"Why Boruto?" Naruto asked. Takashi shrugged.

"Boruto is from this dimension. I wasn't sure if I could do this if I tried to locate Mom or Mira. I figured it was better to be safe than sorry."

"Makes sense. Continue."

"It appears that they are still moving through the Land of Lighting. I can try to see if I can zoom in the image more if you want me to, Lord Hokage."

"Sure, let's see if it works. And stop being so formal, Takashi! Call me whatever nickname you and your sisters came up with."

"If you're sure-"

"Of course I'm-"

"Oh, for the love of all that is holy, you two can discuss this later!" Geeze, Sakura, why are you so tense- Oh, right…

The group watched as the map replaced itself with static again before clearing, becoming a clear image. Zetsu and Psycho Haruno where standing in the middle of the Land of Lighting. The pair stood next to his counterpart's cage and the giant slug that had swallowed up Boruto and Shikamira. They seemed to be arguing with Psycho Haruno glaring fervently at the slug.

"That's not good." Sakura leaned forward to get a better look at the slug before shaking her head. "Yep, that's Yoki alright."

"Yoki?"

"The chakra stealing slug. One of the few offensive and healing slugs in the contract. His main job is to steal the chakra out of anyone in his belly."

"But that means…" Shikadai furiously growled as Takashi whipped his head around to glare at the slug.

"They're trying to steal Mira and Boruto's chakra." Takashi finished.

 _What the?_ Naruto side glanced at his also frozen teammates before his gaze fell to his feet.

"Troublesome. Boys, rein in your shadows." At Shikamaru's order, Naruto could move again as their shadows slicked back into place. The boys blushed in embarrassment.

"What a drag. I haven't done that since I was five."

"How do you think I feel? I've never done that before." Takashi waved him off.

"That's because you're awaken now. More chakra means you need more control."

"What's your excuse?"

"I'm half Uzumaki. We don't do anything normal." Truer words have never been spoken.

"Takashi's right, Shikadai." Shikadai looked up as his father spoke to him. "You have more chakra now. Don't let your emotions take over that control of yours."

Shikadai's mouth started to open when Naruto felt a tug at his navel. His vision blackened.

 _What the hell, Kur- Why are there two of you?_

Yep, there were definitely two Kurama's in his mindscape. While the mindscape was no longer a jailed-up sewer, it was still a tight squeeze with the two Kuramas sitting next to each other. The Kurama on the right was stocking him up, his red eyes never leaving Naruto's.

 _ **I was expecting longer hair.**_ The Kurama on the right noted. _**We meet at last, Naruto Uzumaki.**_

 _Um, hi?_

 _ **Hm, just as eloquent as my Naruto, it seems.**_ The Kurama on the left (which Naruto was 99.9% certain was his Kurama) rolled his eyes at his counterpart.

 _ **Kit, meet your girl self's Ninetails. Apparently, he has his own delivery service.**_

 _ **Just appreciate the fact that your jailer doesn't go through heat and has the most recurrent sex life with her mate that puts rabbits to shame.**_

 _Huh? What-_

 _ **Nonetheless, my jailer wanted me to tell you a few things so listen up because we don't have much time. First off, her former teammate and the alien reject have figured out that they can extract me out of her-**_

 _We already know that._ Naruto pointed out. _They want to use you to resurrect Kaguya and put her in Shikamira's body. Boruto's eye is supposed to lead them to the exact location of where Kaguya was sealed away._ Kurama #2 deadpanned at him.

 _ **Of course, Shikamaru must have figured it out al-**_

 _Actually, my Shikamaru, don't even-_

 _ **Your Shikamaru, huh?**_ Yeah, he walked into that one. Naruto rolled his eyes at his prisoner/friend.

 _Whatever, Shikamaru figured it out. Yours is currently passed out on the couch after a nearly killing himself because he broke down that stupid barrier-_

 _ **Shikamaru messed with fuinjutsu?!**_ Naruto and Kurama #1 blinked in surprise as a cloud of doom appeared over Kurama #2.

 _ **I'm doomed.**_

 _ **Doomed?**_

 _ **You don't know.**_ Kurama #2 insisted. _**She'll be mad, overprotective and horny when she finds out. Then they get into a fight over who should protect who and blah, blah, blah. And then they'll have copious amounts of makeup sex. I'm doomed! Doomed, I tell you!**_

…

 _Yep, didn't need to know that._

 _ **Me neither, Kit.**_

 _ **You have no idea what it's like when she was growing up. Clothes, periods, sex, bitchy teammates, piety drama, sex-**_

 _ **Sounds pretty much the same to me.**_ Hey! But before he could verbalize his protest.

"Ow! Dammit Sasuke, you bastard!" Sasuke had punched him out of his mindscape.

"Naruto, we've been trying to talk to you for the past ten minutes." Sakura explained as Naruto picked himself up off of the ground.

"Sorry."

"So what did Kurama want?" Takashi asked as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He was getting antsy. "I know you were talking to him."

"Kurama?" Shikamaru parroted, earning a blush from the blonde man as horrifying images flashed through his mind.

Nope, bad thoughts, Naruto, nope.

"Yeah, well, apparently Takashi's mother and I share a mindscape so her Kurama was sent over to tell us Zetsu's master plan."

"Which we already know." Shikamaru and Sakura deadpanned.

"Hn."

"True but-"

" _ **Oi, Male Naruto, I had more to say."**_

"If it's more about her sex life-"

" _ **No, you idiot! As much as I would love to kept going on and on about my jailer's mating habits, they aren't important! Haruno's can't die unless to complete incinerate her corpse! And the only way you can kill Zetsu is to kill him with an awaken Nara! With Shikamira is still in the belly of the slug, Shikamaru out for the count and your lack of an understanding about fuinjutsu, you won't be able to kill Zetsu!"**_

"Don't worry, Kurama #2. We've got that covered. Mind telling Uzumaki that we'll be there soon?"

" _ **Uzu- Ah, yes, I'll tell her. But you get to tell her that Shikamaru messed with fuinjutsu again. I don't pity you. Goodbye Me. I hope to never see you again."**_

" _ **I doubt that will happen."**_

" _ **I know but one can dream."**_

"What?" He could feel everyone's eyes on him.

"You were talking to Kurama out loud again." Sakura admitted.

"So?" He didn't understand the looks.

"The Kuramas' kind off took over your voice when they spoke to you."

"So, you guys heard that last conversation…" Naruto figured out, much to his chagrin. See, his vocabulary had improved a lot since he became Hokage.

 _ **Suffer.**_

To hell with you, Kurama #2.

"Ok, I'm going to try ignoring the fact that Kurama talk's about Mom's- you know what, I'm not even going there." Takashi blanched in disgust.

"Am I, err- Nara that bad at fuinjutsu?" Shikamaru asked. Takashi shuddered.

"Yep and so is Mira."

"Ok then. We should get going. Takashi, can you get their coordinates?"

"Give me five minutes."

"Alright then, everyone-"

"WAIT!"

Naruto spun around only to tumble backwards into the ground. And of course, he could have dodged the attack. He just chose not to- Stop rolling your eyes, Kurama! Groaning, Naruto raised himself onto his elbows. He blinked.

"Motoko?"

The littlest Nara Uzumaki was the child he knew the least and had spent the least amount of time with. She was an adorable thing, though. So small with Nara's coloring and big, amethyst Uzumaki eyes. She sat on his chest, her tiny fists gripping his orange sweatshirt. She was giving him a tiny, pouting frown. Small tears pooled out of the corner of her eyes as she gave him a baby glare. She looked just like Himawari when she was that age and wanted nothing more than to be held. He barely registered the fact that everyone that had stayed at the compound had ran after Motoko. He just kept watching the trembling child, who looked ready to sob at any second.

"Eh, Momo!"

"Motoko, get back-"

"Naruto, are you-"

"Bad, Guy Mommy. You didn't say goodbye." Motoko's words silenced the growing noise from everyone. His undivided attention was solely on the four-year-old with the trembling bottom lip.

"Mommy says that you should always say goodbye and 'I love you' before you leave for a mission. In case something bad happens. Why were you leaving without saying goodbye?" Naruto could feel his gaze soften as he took in the sight of the worried little girl.

"Motoko's right!" Benihime cried as she rushed over to Shikamaru. She didn't even wait for him to open his arms to her as she leaped up. She wrapped herself around his neck as he stumbled to keep them upright. Her red hair shook with her trembling shoulders as she tried to bury herself into the crook of his neck.

"You're supposed to say goodbye and 'I love you' because you don't know what's going to happen, and we just met you but you're family and we want everyone back and safe and please come back because we scared and we're sorry we didn't get spend any time with you!" Benihime's confession caused Motoko to hiccup as the tears fell from both girls.

If anything, this entire experience had taught Naruto three things.

Being Hokage has totally dulled his senses and he needed to step up his game bigtime.

The guys were right when they thought that Naruto would be a pretty girl if he had been one (the bastards…).

And most importantly, he had been neglecting his family for too long and that ends now.

Kakashi was right. Naruto had been stuck in that damn office for so long that he failed to see the turmoil under his own roof. He failed to see that Boruto's anger towards him was really him saying that he missed spending time with his dad. He failed to see how lonely Hinata was behind her fake smiles because she didn't want to stress him even more. He failed to see how Himawari was blossoming right from under his nose, growing stronger and smarter with each passing day. He had failed them but that ended, today.

Paperwork, be damned.

"Girls-" Naruto raised his hand, silencing the older brother before using the free arm to cradle Motoko close. Gingerly, he stood as the little one soaked his sweatshirt with her tears. There was a tug on his pant leg and Naruto didn't even have to look down to know that it was his own baby girl. He swung Himawari up into his other arm. Blinking back the tears in her beautiful Hyuga eyes, Himawari peppered kisses on his cheek.

"I love you, Daddy. Be safe."

"Love you too, Princess." He whispered, kissing her forehead before shifting Motoko up slightly, causing the brunette to look up at him. He gave her a big Uzumaki grin.

"You're right, Motoko. Thank you for reminding me that I forgot to say goodbye." Motoko smiled back at him. She pulled herself up so that she could peck his cheek.

"Love you, Guy Mommy. I'm sorry I didn't get to spend time with you." She spoke slowly, as if she was carefully choosing ever word so that she got her point across. To be so young and so sharp, that had to be He pecked her hairline.

"Love you too, kiddo. Don't you worry, we'll spend more time together when we get back. Right, Shikamaru?"

The advisor nodded in agreement, but you could tell that his attention was locked onto Benihime. He was muttering to her softly, bouncing her up and down slightly as her smile started to replace the tears.

"When you get back, we're going to get ramen." Benihime pointed her finger against Shikamaru's chest, as if daring him to say otherwise. "Then we'll go cloud watching and you can tell about when you were a genin and about Asuma-Sensei."

"Oh, is that what you do with your father?" At her nod, Shikamaru smirked at her. "I guessing I'm not getting a fuinjutsu lesson?"

"No fuinjutsu for you." Benihime deadpanned. "Bad, Other Daddy. It's ok, though. I still love you. Be safe and come back. I want my ramen."

"Does your father ever say no to you?" Shikamaru kissed her forehead.

"No. Either does Uncle Kakashi. Mommy says it's a problem."

"I see. Love you too, Benihime. Don't be too troublesome to Temari."

"Me? Troublesome? Never!" They shared wink. It was good to see Benihime act like her mischievous self again and it came as no surprise to Naruto when the redette grinned an Uzumaki grin as she locked her sights on her next target.

"Dai!"

"Ah, Beni!" Naturally, Himawari and Motoko decided to join in on the fun too.

"Geeze, Hima! Momo, Beni, Dai needs to be able to breathe!"

"Sorry, Taka! Sorry, Dai!"

"Man, you girls are troublesome."

"But Dai, we're your troublesome girls! Right, Momo?"

"Right!"

 _Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two._

Don't worry, Not Shika, they were going to protect your family. _Our family!_ _Believe it!_

 **Author's Note - (Dodges chair because of the cheesy last line) Ok, peeps, this is the last fillery chapter in this story because shit is going to go done for the next few chapters! Obviously, I'll still have humor in this story, but it's about to get serious. Also, before I get the 'Your FemNaru is too OP', people, be patient. If you haven't notice, Canon Naruto's hasn't been able to kick ass like he normally does. I did that so that you guys could see the differences between Canon (who we can all agree, or mostly agree, is OP AF, even for the world of shonen anime) and 2.0. I wanted to give 2.0 some time to shine before I let Canon do its thing. If you know what I mean. And lastly, does it seem like Canon is adjusting to 2.0 too quickly? You could argue that yes, it does seemed rushed but I really don't think so. The way I see it, Canon could either completely disavow 2.0 altogether or they could accept the craziness around them and have fun doing it. So, what do you guys think? Did you love the chapter? Tell me your thoughts! Give me your ideas! Also, shout out to my artists out there who would love to make a cover for this story! You guys rock and we are one follower short of 150 followers! (YAY!) I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	17. You Are My Friend, AH AH

**Author's Note - Hi guys, I've overcome the bane of every writer. That's right. I was blocked! Writer's block is a real thing and it sucks... Anyway, as you guys all know, writing fight scenes, so not my forte. And I felt that you guys needed some more background info about one character in particular. Sakura 2.0 to be exact. And to do that, we kind of had to dive head first into Konoha 2.0 again. Thus, that's why Naruto 2.0 is starting us off (brownie points to anyone who gets why I picked this particular chapter title). Now, while the first half of the chapter, once again, appears fillery, it's not and it's also giving you guys a preview of what I have next for the fic's sequel. There's so much more I want to tell you guys but this note is getting too long and you've guys haven't had a chapter in a while. Now, I think I've kept you guys waiting long enough! I hope you like the chapter! On to the story!**

Chapter 17: You Are My Friend, AH AH

 _The Lady Hokage_

Ok, so Naruto's made a few mistakes in her days which was normal because, hello, she was human. And a shinobi. And like the majority of her mistakes, they were centered around fuinjutsu. Now, when Naruto was first starting out learning fuinjutsu just after her promotion, she was basically doing the ye-old, _read then copy and hope you don't die_ , technique. Could she have gone to Pervy Sage and forced him to teach her? Yeah, she could have but there was a lot of shit going on, her and Shikamaru were traveling a lot as the Leaf Ambassadors and they were basic seals, just how dangerous can they be?

Extremely dangerous, it turns out which was why she was forbidden from experimenting with seals while in the Main House until after her mastery.

Anyway, while her greatest mistake was agreeing to let Sakura (aka. backstabbing, jealous, bitch of an ex-teammate) raise Sarada, her second greatest mistake was to let that very same woman learn fuinjutsu.

What? How the hell did that happen, you are wondering? Well sit tight because this is a long ass story.

And seeing as Naruto wasn't going anywhere anytime soon (stupid, Kurama-proof cage), now was the perfect time to go down memory lane. It all started back at the academy. Or more specifically, the academy's mediocre at best attempts at Kunoichi Lessons.

People often forget that Yoshino Nara wasn't just the Lady Nara but also an extremely well-respected chunin in her day. Like, so well respected that the only reason she wasn't a jonin was because she liked her job as Vice-Commander of the Chunin Assassination Divination too much to leave until after she had had Shikamaru.

Reason 55 as to why you don't mess with Yoshino.

Anyway, Naruto had decided to invite Hinata and Ino over to the compound so that they could teach her the _oh so important_ message behind the bugloss, dog's vine and basil bouquet (they were already friends and Sakura was very unhappy to learn about the girls' friendship once they became teammates, but that was a story for another time).

As you can see, skipping with the boys had been a much better decision. But Ino had nagged that learning how to read flower messages was important and Hinata wanted to make sure that Naruto didn't fail the next test and you really can't say no to Hinata because then she'll giving you the Puppy Dog Eyes no Jutsu and –

Sorry, rambling again.

Where was she? Oh, right. Major story time! Anyway, they had come with her to the compound and that is when it all started.

" _But Ino, this isn't important! Half of these plants aren't even native to the Fire Country, let alone Konoha." Naruto pouted, crossing her arms and glaring at her fellow blonde from her seat in front of the couch._

 _Hinata was behind her on the sofa, braiding her golden locks so that she couldn't run away. See, sweet and innocent Hinata is a closet sadist for making her sit through Ino's going on and on about flowers. Ino, on the other hand, was using Shikaku's coffee table as pedestal to stand on as she lectured on, and on, and on._

" _So? What if you're on a mission in a different country and you see aconite in someone's window?"_

" _I'd say, 'oh, that's a pretty flower that no one knows the name of,' and keeping walking."_

" _Naruto, I think your time with Shikamaru's family has made you sassy."_

" _Eh? Really?" Naruto tilled her head back to smile at her quieter and no longer stuttering friend. That was Naruto's doing, in case you wanted to know. "Cool!"_

" _No, not cool! Naruto, how can you become the Hokage if you don't pass your kunoichi classes?!"_

" _Shikamaru and I will think of something." Naruto reassured Ino, who sweat-dropped with Hinata at her casual, yet dead-serious and confident tone. "He's already calculated the bare minimum we need to pass so as long as I don't completely bomb this test, I'll be fine."_

" _Only that lazy-bum would figure out how much you guys needed to not have another year in the academy." Ino grumbled as Naruto grinned._

" _You know how he is, Ino. He's lazy."_

" _No really?" Ino replied sarcastically. The Yamanaka was going to say something else when-_

" _Oh, he gets that from Shikaku." The girls all jumped and looked up, only to find Yoshino standing upside down on the ceiling. The matriarch wasn't wearing her pink dress today and was still lounging around in her old assassination uniform that she had worn to the Traditional Morning Training. If memory served, Yoshino was supposed to be meeting up with some old coworkers for a get-together/spar royal. The girls watched as Yoshino walked off the ceiling and down the wall. While the older woman didn't look upset at them, she was giving off that vibe again. You know, the one that appears when she's about to smack Shikaku around with her frying pan. Yeah, that one._

" _How long have you been up there, Aunt Yoshino?" Ino asked tentatively as Yoshino picked up Ino's textbook and started flicking through it. Her mouth fell into a frown as she continued to read. They sat in silence, watching the woman grew more irritated with every page before she snapped the book shut._

" _Enough." Was her short response before Yoshino started leafing through the rest of Ino's notes in a hurry. "Girls, have you started learning about Seduction yet?"_

" _Seduction?" The three friends all glanced at each other in confusion before shaking their heads._

" _What about Assassination? The basics of poisoning?"_

" _That's for our Jonin-Senseis' to teach us." Hinata nearly stuttered as Yoshino's ire grew more visible. The ex-chunin's right eyebrow was twitching, a habit that Shikamaru had inherited from her._

" _Naruto, I know I already gave you 'The Talk' but have they gone over that and pregnancy prevention in class?" Naruto tried to think back to the times that she hadn't skipped kunoichi lessons before shaking her head._

" _No, I don't think so."_

" _THAT'S IT!" The girls straightened in their sits at the shout as Yoshino shoved Ino's stuff back into her bag. She slung it over her shoulders. "Follow me, girls, we're getting to the bottom of this."_

" _Why?" Ino bravely asked as they were marched out of the door and out of the compound._

" _There's something fishy going on but I need a second opinion."_

That had led to them to Kiba's house, where his mother, Tsume, flipped an even bigger shit than Yoshino did before summoning Kiba's older sister, Hana, home from their veterinary clinic. After Hana had confirmed that, no, that wasn't the curriculum that she was taught, and holy shit, do those assholes at the academy want them to be unprepared for the life of a kunoichi, the girls found themselves being taught actual kunoichi lessons every Saturday until their graduation by the Inuzuka women. After graduation, the lessons continued until the shit hit the fan at the Chunin Exams.

Where was Sakura during all of this? Well, originally the lessons were only for Hinata, Ino and Naruto. They had done this for a few reasons.

First reason, politics.

Ino and Hinata were both heiresses and there was no way that they weren't getting a jonin-sensei. As for Naruto, do to her position as kind of the next Lady Nara (she'll explain that later) and being the village's jinchuriki (not that she knew about that at the academy) also meant that she would have a jonin-sensei.

The second reason was that Sakura and Ino weren't friends at that time. The whole, I love Sasuke and I can't be your friend anymore, fight had already happened and Ino was still salty about it. ( _I was the one to protect her from those bullies! I was the one who started our friendship and she wants to throw it away for Sasuke! Well, fine, let's see if I ever help her again!)_ Ino's crush over Sasuke was more of a competition between her and Sakura than an actual crush. And since Hinata and Naruto tried to stay as far away from Sasuke's fangirls (ugh) as possible, they weren't friends with Sakura either.

The third reason was the squad formation.

Sakura should not have been on Team 7. Genin teams rarely had two kunoichis and if they did, one of the two kunoichis was the Jonin Sensei. Case in point, Team 8 with Hinata as a genin and Kurenai as the Jonin Sensei. The main reason being that years of analysis since Konoha's founding showed that kunoichi's were pushed more and grew faster when they were pushed by their male shinobi teammates. Those kunoichi were tougher, were smarter. Those kunoichis lived longer. Enemy shinobi don't discriminate when it came to completing their mission. Shinobi, kunoichi, it didn't matter. On the battlefield, no one pulled back punches and placing kunoichis on a male heavy team prepared them for the battlefield. Thus, by all accounts, Naruto's Team 7 shouldn't have happened.

Not that Team 7 was much of a team, mind you.

Kakashi was her big brother and Naruto loved him very much. But Gramps had to be smoking something over than tobacco when he made her team because, quite frankly, Kakashi had been a shit sensei.

Kakashi had suffered so much in his life before becoming a jonin sensei that he made up a plan to protect himself from further heartbreak.

Step 1: Fail every genin team the Third had tried to force on him.

Which he did. Until her year came around and the civilian council and 'Honorable (her toned ass) Elders' flat out ordered him to be Sasuke's sensei. Since Sasuke was the Rookie of the Year, his genin team needed the Kunoichi of the Year and the Deadlast. Sakura and her.

However, this is where the tension between Sakura and her all started because Sakura shouldn't have been the Kunoichi of the Year.

Not that Naruto was saying that _she_ should have been the Kunoichi of the Year. _Hell no._ Her scores were nowhere near the level of Kunoichi of the Year, due to the sabotage of her first three years learning by every academy sensei (sans Iruka, obviously) and her fourth and last year of her wanting to keep her growth and intelligence under the radar (which her and Shikamaru planned to do, but that was a story for another time, and, man you guys are in for an even longer story time later and oh, would you look at that, foreshadowing, oh!).

Ino or Hinata should have been Kunoichi of the Year. Sakura did great on the written exams, there was no denying that. Ino and Hinata both out scored her in all of the other categories. Ino knew this, Hinata knew this and Sakura knew that Naruto knew too. Because of this, Sakura tried to assert her place on the Team 7 as ' _the true kunoichi of Team 7 because Naruto didn't actually pass the graduation test so she shouldn't be on this team, right, Sasuke?'_. In Sakura's mind, Naruto had been the girl who was trying to steal her place on Team 7. Oh, and Sasuke too.

Which, Naruto really wasn't trying to steal Sasuke, more like give him the Uzumaki sisterly affection that he craved. But to Sakura, that made Naruto her second rival for Sasuke's love.

Now imagine a genin team consisting of an emotional reek of a jonin-sensei, a brooding, anti-social and nearly mute avenger who needed Uchihaniese translation whenever he 'spoke', a jealous kunoichi who wasn't really prepared for any of the physically aspects of being a kunoichi and Naruto, the village's jinchuriki that was hated by civilians and yet somehow was not-dating the heir of one of the Leaf's most important clans, oh and by the way, just so happened to be a competent kunoichi.

Yeah, it was not pretty. There was a reason Naruto spent most of her free time with Team 10. Any attempts by Naruto to bond with Sakura, like saying that they should go get ramen or inviting Sakura to join the rest of the girls for Kunoichi Lessons, were rebuffed, violently.

 _They had been with their teams for about a week now and Saturday was rapidly approaching. The past week could only be summed up with one word, troublesome. Naruto was annoyed and getting bored (which was a dangerous combination to begin with) and the Naras could sense her growing ire. Granted, her violently stabbing her chopsticks into her omelet probably queued them about her unpleasant mood._

" _What did you do?" Shikaku accused his half-sleep son. Yoshino, who was best in the family at reading the room, just patted Naruto on the shoulder and topped of her juice for her. Shikamaru blinked out the Post Traditional Morning Training Nap from his eyes before shaking his head in confusion._

" _Shikamaru's fine. He has a team that, you know, actually talks to each other without using grunts, hns, and fangirling." Naruto tightened the grip on her chopsticks before the left one snapped. She also ignored Shikamaru's comment of 'Ino fangirls too, you know' because this was her rant about teammates, thank you very much. "Oh, and his Jonin-Sensei is on time and doesn't make shit excuses when he's not."_

" _Language." Yoshino's scolding held no bite behind it as she stood to get another set of chopsticks. Shikaku raised an eyebrow at the angry blonde that sat across from him. Shikamaru, the lazy-ass that he was, just shrugged and tried to focus on finishing his breakfast without passing out into his plate again. Naruto gave him a pass though. She had spent the past week ranting to him as they walked home from their training fields._

" _How late has Hatake been?" Was Shikaku, amused? Naruto, who had been adding more protein on Shikamaru's plate (because he didn't eat enough protein, or food in generally, in the mornings), snapped her head up as the realization struck her like a kunai._

" _You knew?!" How dare he smirk at her. Maybe Yoshino would let her borrow her frying pan. "You knew that Kakashi-Sensei was late to everything AND that D-ranks were just glorified chores and you didn't tell me?!"_

" _Of course, he knew. Just like he knew that Asuma-Sensei can't talk without a cigarette in his mouth." Excuse you, Shikamaru, she so did not need his sass right now. "He's the Jonin Commander."_

 _That does it! Both Nara men gulped as she grinned wildly._

" _Yoshino, can I borrow your frying pan?" Please say yes, please say yes._

" _Why?" Yoshino popped her head back in only to yelp when Shikaku was suddenly in front of her. Two seconds later, she was slug over her husband's shoulder._

" _Later kids. Don't forget to clean up." And the adults had left the building._

 _Cricket, cricket. Then Shikamaru groaned, banging his forehead onto the table as he side-glared at her. Naruto scratched the back of her head with a nervous laugh._

" _Oops?"_

" _Man, what a drag. Come on, we're going to be late. Troublesome Girl."_

" _Lazy Boy."_

 _Not that it mattered that if Naruto was late for practice because of Kakashi-Sensei but she would feel bad if she made Shikamaru late. There was only so much of Ino's nagging he could take on a daily basis. Wasn't she a good friend? Anyway, they walked to Training Field 10 first, since it was the closest to the Nara compound. Asuma-Sensei spotted them first from his reclined position against an oak tree._

" _Naruto, thank you for making sure that your boyfriend didn't sleep in." Asuma-Sensei's teasing caused the teens to sweat-drop as the rest of Team 10 snickered. Shikamaru and Naruto didn't even bother to correct Team 10 anymore and it's only been a week. It was just too, what's the word… oh! Troublesome, that's it!_

" _Well, I'll see you later." Naruto waved goodbye as she turned to start the hike to her own training field when Ino called out,_

" _Hey, Naruto, is Sakura joining us on Saturday?" She stumbled slightly before turning back to face her fellow blonde. Naruto rubbed the back of her neck, her cheeks rouging in embarrassment._

" _She keeps saying no… kind of." Naruto's confession caused Ino's eyebrow to go to her hairline._

" _Kind of?"_

 _Naruto could feel the sweat dripping down the back of her neck as she tried to ignore Ino's beading gaze. Her teammates also had looks of peaking interest. Even Shikamaru had that 'what aren't you telling me' look in his eyes. A lot, she was hiding a lot from him but she didn't want to keep bothering him with her problems._

 _While she could rant for hours and hours about Kakashi-Sensei's inability to look at a clock or Sasuke's need for a Uchihaniese translator, there was always something that stopped Naruto from voicing what she really thought about her female teammate. If Naruto was being honest with herself, it probably had something to do with her childhood. Or more specifically, the fact that Sakura came from a civilian home._

 _Naruto didn't trust civilians. At all. Except Old Man Ichiraku and Ayame but they were different and family. Granted, shinobis weren't always the nicest to her but at least they didn't destroy her stuff, overcharge her food and clothes, kick her out of restaurants for just entering the building, or drive her out of orphanages in a snowstorm. Shinobis just kind of ignored her which honestly, Naruto preferred. At least when you're ignored, you don't have worry about leaving for school and not knowing what kind of home you'll come back to. So yeah, Naruto didn't trust civilians._

 _And Sakura, well, Sakura was the embodiment of every civilian stereotype that made Naruto's life hell._

 _Sakura was mean. She yelled at Naruto for suggesting them teaming up to find Sasuke during their bell test. Then she had the balls to yell at Naruto for offering the tied-to-a-log pinkette lunch because her offer was suggesting that Naruto was 'trying to make her fat so that Sasuke won't like her and get to keep Sasuke all to herself!' All Naruto was trying to do was help because just because she didn't like Sakura, Naruto didn't want her to starve._

 _Sakura was lazy. Every freaking D-rank that Team 7 had done this past week had taken forever because Sakura was too busy trying (and failing) to seduce Sasuke while doing something as unsexy as pull weeds or paint a fence. And because Sasuke, the poor boy was surely scarred from liking anything remotely girly and feminine by now, ended up having to hide behind Kakashi-Sensei just so that he wouldn't have to look at her._

 _And who was doing all of the work, you must be wondering? Naruto, that's who, because dammit, she wanted to get paid and she was terrified to think about how this whole situation would have been if she wasn't living with Shikamaru and his family. Because D-rank pay sucked, her orphan pension stopped when she became a shinobi and only doing one mission a day wouldn't have paid the rent for her old shit-hole of an apartment._

 _Lastly, Sakura was not kunoichi quality. Period. End of story. How she passed anyway of the physical test was beyond Naruto. Though, she did have a good right hook so Naruto did have to give the other girl credit for that. Even still, all Sakura did was scream at Naruto for trying to crack a joke, whine about how training was making her sweat and stalk Sasuke. That's it._

 _For the sake of Team 7 and to make sure Sakura didn't die on an actual mission (Naruto may not like Sakura, but she didn't want her dead), Naruto decided that Sakura needed actual kunoichi lessons. She had tried to invite the girl this past week after Kakashi-Sensei dismissed them from their D-ranks. Their conversations normally went as followed._

" _Hey Saku-"_

" _Sasuke! You did amazing today during our mission- wait, Sasuke, are you leaving so soon? Wait for me! I'll walk you home!"_

 _Or…_

" _Hey Saku-"_

" _Shut up, Naruto!" Insert violent punch to the head here. "Dammit, Sasuke heard you, you idiot! It'll take me hours to find him again."_

 _Or…_

" _Sakura, Hinata, Ino and I-"_

" _Ino-pig, you're friends with Ino?!"_

" _Yeah, listen. The girls and I hang out on Saturdays and I wanted to invite you to join us. You know, for kunoichi bonding."_

" _Oh, so that you can fatten me up when you all go get ramen so that Sasuke won't want to be with me anymore and run away with you?! Fat chance of that happening!"_

" _Dude, I don't even like Sasuke like that-"_

" _Shut up, you idiot! Oh! Sasuke, I have cabbages for you for our dinner together! You're favorite!"_

" _His favorite food is tomatoes."_

" _Not it's not! Right, Sasuke?!"_

" _Hn."_

" _WHAT?!"_

 _That last conversation was from yesterday._

 _And did Shikamaru know anything about this? Nope, because Sakura was her problem and she could handle it and Shikamaru had already done so much for her and if he knew she really wasn't being overly dramatic about her team's dynamic then he'll do something impulsive and-_

 _Oh, would you look at that, Team 10 was still waiting for her answer to Ino's question._

" _She's kind of shooting me down whenever I trying asking her… She thinks that all we do is go get ramen and she's on 'diet' again." Ino's eyes grew wide before they narrowed rapidly. Ino whizzed around to smile a 'we're going to do what I want' smile at Asuma-Sensei._

" _Sensei, I'll be back in a bit."_

 _Ino didn't listen to Naruto's words of 'really Ino, you don't have to do this' as Ino frog marched them to Training Field 7. The remainder of Ino-Shika-Cho had made the executive decision to follow the girls because catfights are always fun to watch. Choji, always the prepared one, brought popcorn for moments just like these. Before the group had crossed into Training Field 7, Naruto had convinced Ino to let her enter the field first. She drew in a deep breath and steeled her nerves._

" _Hey guys." Naruto called out as she approached the opening in the forest with the three logs. Sasuke looked up from his mediating position on the left most log and gave her a 'please end my suffering' look as Sakura continued her babbling at him. Of course, her arrival attracted Sakura's attention. Immediately, the happy, goofy look on her face morphed into annoyance._

" _You're late!" Naruto rolled her eyes which irritated Sakura more. "Kakashi-Sensei said to be here at 9:00!"_

" _Like he'd be here on time." Naruto's grumbling caused Asuma-Sensei to snort, signaling her teammates of the other people in the field._

" _Oh Sasuke!" Ino called out with a smirk. "Is Forehead giving you trouble? I could beat her up for you!"_

" _Shut up, Ino-Pig! Sasuke loves talking to me! Right, Sasuke?"_

" _Hn."_

" _Translation: kill me now."_

" _Shut up, Naruto! Why are you guys here, anyway? This isn't your training field."_

" _Geeze, aggressive much. Man, you weren't kidding, were you?" Shikamaru admitted as he held out his hand for some popcorn. Naruto sent him a 'no shit, Shikamaru' look over her shoulder before Ino pulled her back to attention with the arm that she had thrown over Naruto's petite shoulders._

" _Anyway Sakura, Naruto's told me that you weren't joining us on Saturday for Kunoichi Lessons." Ino stated. Sakura's face scrunched up with confusion._

" _Kunoichi Lessons? Those ended with the academy. And when did you guys become friends?"_

" _I told you, she wouldn't let me explain." Naruto explained to Ino in a whisper before speaking up louder. "We get lessons with Kiba's mom and sister on Saturdays at 8:00 am. We usually get ramen for lunch if we aren't too exhausted afterwards."_

" _And we want you to join us!" Ino chirped, steamrolling Sakura's attempts to butt in. "Besides, us kunoichi have to stick together! Right, Naruto?"_

" _Right." Naruto inspected her teammate as the words sunk. Sakura was contemplating everything, her large forehead wrinkling as she thought. Then, those green eyes flashed with annoyance._

" _You two think you're so smart, don't you?" The blondes shared a confused look as Sakura stood and started to stalk over to them. Naruto tensed, knowing what was coming next._

" _You two are jealous that I did better than you at the academy and are trying to sabotage my training. Kunoichi lessons, HA! Maybe if you two paid attention in class you wouldn't need extra help from dog boy's family. I don't need your help. Sasuke and I will be the greatest shinobi couple Konoha's ever seen!"_

 _Cricket, cricket._

 _Behind them, Choji's bag of popcorn littered the grass as Shikamaru and Asuma-Sensei sounded a pair of 'what the hell just happened?'. Naruto sighed in defeat for what seemed to be the umpteenth time this past week. Could Naruto do anything without it biting her in the ass?_

 _Sasuke just ignored the scene with a grunt, dismissing Sakura's comment about them being a couple, like always. Next to her, Ino froze before a dangerous vibe started to erupt from Yamanaka. She looked ready to pounce when-_

" _Maa, Sakura, that's a little harsh, don't you think?" Kakashi-Sensei's voice rung out before he dropped down from the trees, his porn still in his hands. While the silver-haired man still gave of his hip/young, cool guy vibe, you could tell that he was unsettled by the conversation. "I'm sure they aren't trying to sabotage your training."_

" _Finally decided to show up, have you?" Asuma-Sensei grumbled, his lighter clicking before the smell of tobacco wafted through the field. "You know, when I heard that you were getting two kunoichi's, I thought you were getting the easy team. Clearly I was wrong."_

" _Ah, Asuma, you wound me. You see, this old lady stepped on a crack and-"_

" _No, it's too early in the morning for your bull. Team." Team 10 looked back at their sensei. "We're heading out. We've got three D-ranks that we have to do before sunlight. I've got an important meeting tonight." Team 10 gave him a deadpanned look of 'Really, Sensei?'._

" _Right, meeting." Shikamaru snorted._

" _Sensei, Kurenai-Sensei will understand if you're late." Choji reassured as Asuma-Sensei sputtered at the realization that literally everyone in Konoha knew about the two senseis dating each other._

" _But Sensei! Forehead clearly needs a lesson on what it actually needs to be a kunoichi before she gets herself, or worse, her team killed because of her stupidity!" Ino growled the last words out. Sakura met her glare head on._

" _Shut up, Ino! You know nothing! Pig!"_

" _Forehead!"_

" _Snob!"_

" _Billboard Brow!"_

" _Princess!"_

" _Flat-chest!"_

" _You take that back, you bitch!"_

" _And on that note." Shikamaru's shadow shoot out, ensnaring the yellers. "Ino, we're leaving. Sakura, Naruto and Ino were actually trying to be nice to you and be your friends. But if you want to act pity and jealous, please continue. I'm sure you'll have boys flocking at your door at this rate."_

 _His sarcastic words caused Sakura to flinch back as the jutsu receded away. Ino looked ready to ignore him but a nudge from Naruto stopped her. The heiress took a deep breath and nodded. Her glare didn't leave Sakura as she asked,_

" _See you tomorrow?"_

" _Yeah, see you tomorrow." Naruto said back with a smile that wasn't really all that there. The other team could tell that she wasn't all that happy to see them go but they couldn't stay forever._

 _As Team 10 walked away, Naruto felt the burning glare that dug into her back._

 _Man, Naruto looked up at the sky for strength, what a drag._

After that whole debacle, Naruto's relationship with Sakura went from annoying teammate who could maybe be a friend to 'I can't wait to never see you again'. They got into bad catfights nearly every day and Naruto was 95% certain that their fighting (and Kakashi-Sensei's ass) were some of the key reasons for why Sasuke swore off women forever.

How does this all link back to Naruto's god-awful mistake of teaching Sakura fuinjutsu? The answer is actually quite simple. Naruto felt guilty.

She felt guilty because it was true what Sakura had said during their fight in Not Shika's backyard.

" _Bullshit... You were everyone's favorite. The Naras, Kakashi's, Sasuke's, Sai's, Tsuande's. The list goes on and on! It was always Naruto this, Naruto that!"_

Naruto had realized that after the Fourth Shinobi War, when everyone was finding love and having babies and Sakura had no one. Sasuke was gay and didn't love her. Ino was spending most of her time with Sai. Kakashi had just become Hokage. Tsunade was too busy making up for lost time. And Naruto, well, Naruto was living the fantasy that the pinkette had craved since she joined the academy.

It was Naruto who had fell in love with a clan heir. It was Naruto who was Kakashi's favorite (because she was his adopted little sister, duh). It was Naruto who received private strength training from Granny before Naruto had convinced the Fifth Hokage to take Sakura under her wing while she was away. It was Naruto who was the daughter of the Fourth Hokage and the Red-Hot Habanero instead of civilian merchants. It was Naruto who saved the day, got married, had kids, became Hokage, became a legend. And what was Sakura in all of this?

The _**other**_ female teammate of Team 7. The support. The medic. The one who would be forgotten in the history books.

So, after years of failing to find something the two kunoichis could bound over, Naruto decided to try one more thing. Fuinjutsu.

 _The war had just ended a month ago and the village was starting to become alive again. There was less black clothing worn in the streets as Naruto navigated through the market. She felt a little like Hinata, blushing from all of the attention that everyone was giving her. Her left thumb pressed itself to the bands of her rings before she relaxed that hand. Still, the action gave her comfort as she entered her favorite tea shop._

 _Choji's second cousin waved to her from the counter. Naruto smiled back at her before heading to the pink head tucked in the back corner. Green eyes bore into her with nothing. No friendship, no hatred, just nothing. Naruto sighed before sitting across her teammate._

" _Hey." Naruto started off delicately. Sakura's eyes soften a little, her old 'post becoming a chunin' self coming back. Back when Sasuke wasn't around and Sakura had matured under Granny's teaching._

" _Hey."_

" _How are you?" Sakura shrugged at the standard question._

" _Same old, same old. Hospital's busy, nurses are bitches, shinobis won't stay in their beds. You know, the usually." Her answer was boring and had none of the passion Naruto knew that the other girl had. Still, it was the answer that she was looking for. Naruto thanked their waitress for her cup of tea. She took a sip, enjoying the heat that soothed her throat before smirking at her teammate._

" _What if I could show you a way to keep those shinobis in their beds so that you don't have to hunt them down to fix their injuries?" Green eyes sparked back to life._

" _I'm listening."_

Sakura took to fuinjutsu like a month to a flame. Looking back at it, Naruto should have been worried about how easily Sakura absorbed Naruto's first set of fuinjutsu notes before asking for more. But honestly, Naruto was happy that she finally had something her and Sakura could talk about without Naruto feeling like want she was talking about could trigger Sakura's envy. Not to mention that the medic was a natural at fuinjutsu, given her yang heavy chakra and the control she had over it.

The girls had bonded more over fuinjutsu than they had the entire time that they had been teammates. It was nice to have someone to geek with about fuinjutsu and to have them understand what you were talking about. Their relationship took a 180 and everything was looking great. Using her new knowledge, Sakura created barriers that tripled the survival rate of the most severally injured. Sarada came into her life and Sakura quickly became the Chief of the Field Medics and Surgeons afterwards. Sakura became approachable, funny, a close friend and Takashi's godmother.

" _Oi, you two, my bladder is not a kicking post." Naruto grumbled with a loving smile as she rubbed her expanded belly. She was reclined back against a hospital bed for her last checkup before her birth. Shikamaru wanted to be with her but was called away last minute when his genin team flooded his office, the library and the academy. Such adorable little shi-I mean, genins._

" _That's normal. It's a good thing that they're active." Sakura laughed as she lifted Naruto's maturity shirt which was really just one of Shikamaru's old shirt. The medic rubbed the gel over the pregnant belly. "I thought for sure that your kids would be as lazy as Shikamaru."_

" _Don't jinx it." Naruto chided as she watched the fuzzy image of her twins. "How do they look?"_

" _Perfectly healthy and very excited to see you." Sakura reached out to give her patient's hand a gentle and reassuring squeeze. You know, the older Sakura got, the better her bedside manner. "Are you sure you don't want to know the genders?"_

" _I'm sure." The next Lady Hokage patted the spot of her stomach where a little foot kicked. "I want it to be a surprise. Yoshino told me that there's only been boys born in the main family for like the past seven generation or something like that. Just imagine the clan's reaction if we had girls. You should see the size of the pool that they have going. Shikamaru's is pretty certain that at least one of them is a girl, anyway."_

" _Really?"_

" _He says it's because I don't do anything normal so-"_

" _It would be you to give the Nara clan an heiress." Sakura nodded in agreement. "You do have names prepared encase you don't have girls, right?" Sakura reached over to fiddle with the machine._

" _Yep!"_

" _And they're still top secret?"_

" _Yep!" At Sakura's little pout, Naruto giggled. "Oh, don't be that way, Sakura. Not even Hinata knows any of the names. We've only told Yoshino and Granny because we got stuck when we were thinking of them." Mischief radiated from the medic._

" _So, if I get Lady Tsunade drunk later-" A hand shot out to swat at the pinkette in playfulness._

" _You wouldn't!"_

" _Fine, I'm doing teasing." Naruto felt the cheekiness evaporated from the room as Sakura gazed landed on the now visible Eight Sign Seal. "So, I've been doing a lot of research on your seal." Naruto stayed silent, waving her hand to urge her friend to continue._

" _Lady Tsunade and Shizune agree with my findings. This seal will prevent us from performing a cesarean. I know you wanted a natural birth but even with your luck we'll probably need one. So, as one of your midwives and as your fellow fuinjutsu mistress, I'm suggesting that we change your seal to a Four Symbol Seal. According to Lady Tsunade, that was your mother's seal when she gave birth to you. So, as long as the Kyu- sorry, Kurama agrees not to go on a rampage while you give birth, we should have a pretty smooth delivery."_

 _ **You go on one genjustu-infused rampage and they never let you live it down.**_ _Kurama grumbled in her mindscape._ _**Kit, inform your teammate that her findings are sound.**_

 _Promise not to go Biju on the village? Naruto needled teasingly._

 _ **Brat.**_ _His bark held no bit and she felt the warmth from his chakra_. _**I promise.**_

" _Well in that case, will you do the honors, Sakura?" Sakura looked taken aback._

" _Really? You trust me to do this? But I just got my mastery."_

" _Yeah, three years ago." Naruto rolled her eyes. "It's not like I can do this in the state I'm in." She waved to her pregnant belly. "Shikamaru won't even let me step foot into my fuinjutsu shed, which is totally unfair."_

" _Didn't you blow it up four times?"_

" _Hey, that last time was to stop those rogue ninjas and it worked, didn't it?"_

" _Even still, are you sure that you want me to do this?" Sakura asked as she stood. The medic walked over to the other side of the room to organize her equipment. Naruto waited until she was certain that Sakura's back was to her._

" _I wouldn't ask if I wasn't sure. Besides, I trust you, Sakura. Besides, who better to ask than the future godmother of my second born?"_

 _Clap!_

 _The clipboard in Sakura's hands dropped faster than hot coal as green-eyed girl shook slightly. She looked over her shoulder in disbelief._

" _Godmother?" Naruto swallowed nervously before nodding fervently, sitting up more in the bed. Sakura's eyes became dinner plates. Silence fell into the room and Naruto did the only thing she could do when she was nervous. She rambled._

" _Look, Hinata and I swore that we would be the godmothers to each other's first born back when we were still at the academy and Ino's claimed our thirdborn even though Shikamaru and I haven't even talked about having more kids and I know that our friendship's been kind of rocky but you're still my teammate and I was hoping that you would be the godmother-"_

 _Naruto cut herself off as pink hair covered her vision. Sakura was hugging her gently and hiccupped through the soft tears,_

" _Has anyone ever told you that you are way too forgiving?" Naruto laughed and hugged the other woman back._

" _Shikamaru says that it's one of my most troublesome, yet enduring qualities." Sakura snorted loudly. "So, is that a yes?"_

" _Yes, Naruto. I'd love to be a godmother."_

Then it all went to hell when Sakura met Ryuji and Sasuke broke her fragile heart and sanity.

Fast forward to now, with Naruto caged up in (fake) Senju wood and Sakura preparing Kaguya's resurrection in the Land of Lightening. Naruto should have realized it the moment she saw that first barrier that it had been Sakura's work. She had to send Kurama to Male Me, again, to warn him about Sakura's fuinjutsu skills because Kurama had _somehow_ forgotten to mention it the first time around. _Men_.

As she took in the Sixth Path Planetary Devastation gate that jailed Kaguya, she prayed that the rescue team would make it in time. If only to save her babies.

And yes, she did consider Boruto her baby. And Himawari. And Shikadai.

But she had faith that they would all be alright. Besides, there was a lot of Uzumaki luck on their side and no one messed with her family and got away with it. And when this was all over, she'll teach Male Me fuinjutsu and finally be able to ask him the really serious questions like-

 _ **No, he does not go through heat.**_

What? That was totally unfair! Lucky bastard…

 _Advisor Nara_

"Here."

Shikamaru blinked down at his counterpart's son, a raised hand presenting his father's personalized trench knives to him. The boy rubbed the back of his neck bashfully, his eyes casted down. Shikamaru's mind rushed as images of the past soared before him. Takashi looked like him and his son (obviously) but that shy little blonde with blue eyes was all Naruto.

Perhaps it was fallen gaze and hidden tension in his bones, but all Shikamaru could picture was a younger Naruto as he swung slowly on the swing set at the academy. The look in those cobalt eyes as they watched parents picking up their children, the longing for a parent's love.

Takashi was scared, he realized and Shikamaru felt like his heart was going to burst with the paternal instinct to keep the boy safe in his shadow. Mark his word, these kids would be the death of him. And he was totally okay with that.

Shikamaru had thought he had had fatherhood figured out. Shikadai was so much like him when he was that age.

Except for his determination, that was all Temari.

Raising Shikadai had been easy, for the most part. His boy was smart, strong and Shikamaru wouldn't be surprised when he surpassed his old man one day. Shikadai didn't need to be safeguarded from the unforgiving world, just to be nudged in the right direction every now and then. Much like how Shikaku had raised Shikamaru. Then the Nara Uzumaki kids fell into their world and Shikamaru's emotions took over every inch of his being.

The girls, in their effort to keep their heritage a secret without losing the chance to form a connection with him, had opened Shikamaru's eyes to the painful truth about his household. No matter the age, children still needed their fathers to be there. Shikamira and Motoko had practically clung to him while they were here, their eyes always scanning the room just to make sure that he was there with them. They had forced out Shikadai's own clinginess that the boy probably didn't realize he had.

He will forever hate the look of surprise that had ripped across his son's face after Takashi and Metal's spar, as if the very idea that his father wanted to watch him train with his friends during workhours was so foreign to him that it seemed impossible. No son should ever have to be surprised that his father wanted to spend time with his child. He remembered the smile that tugged on Shikadai's mouth afterwards, the look in his eyes of never wanting the day to end was oh so prominent. Shikamaru cursed himself because, truly, he was a coward.

The loss of the baby had caused him to shut down. He had felt so much love towards that babe, a feeling that had only been equaled by his love for Shikadai, that the loss had shattered him.

Had terrified him.

And he ran.

Shikamaru had threw himself into his work, doing everything and anything to avoid being at home with his family. Outwardly, he defended his actions. 'Naruto has only been Hokage for less than a year,' he remembers explaining, 'Someone needs to make sure that the idiot doesn't blow up the village.' Subconsciously, he just didn't want to face his emotions.

He didn't want to talk to Temari about the baby because he feared that he would say the wrong thing (his genius brain seemed to falter whenever he was with his beautiful, strong wife) and that he would lose her forever. He wanted to shield Shikadai away from the strain that was tearing this marriage apart. So, Shikamaru did what he thought was right and kept himself away, buried under paperwork.

Sure, the traditional training meant that he saw Shikadai grow every day, but the underlying nagging in his head distracted him, always reminding him that Temari should be there, with them, during those sacred hours. One year of hiding from his home turned into two, then three, then four and before he knew it, Shikadai was already a genin and ready for the exams.

Shikadai wasn't like Boruto. He didn't throw fits to get his father's attention. He didn't yell. He didn't pull outrageously stupid stunts. Like a Nara, he shut the pain and loneliness away. Like his Suna mother, he soldiered on and didn't complain, didn't cry. Yet Shikadai was so much like his mother and sooner rather than later, the pressure would be too much and he'd collapse under it. And Shikamaru had let him, his little boy, fall into this state.

Some father he was.

Four years of him pushing away his beautiful family and hiding himself away until he became just a shadow of the man he thought that he was. Ironic, really, now that he thought about it. And truthfully, he was a fool for not seeing it sooner. Shikamaru could laugh because it was poetic and fitting, really, that it had taken two girls with Uzumaki blood to drag him out of the shadow, to bring him back to the light of his family that he so desperately carved and missed. It had taken two girls with Uzumaki blood to break the loneliness that was consuming his son.

As Shikamaru stared at the young blonde before him, his heart ached. Takashi was scared that he would reject the situation that they were all in, the fact that his blood ran through the blonde's veins. The knives were bastardized olive branch. 'Take the knives', Takashi's pleading eyes screamed to Shikamaru, 'Please, Other Dad, because I won't be able to handle it if you don't.' He was scared to lose any more people and the boy was making himself sick over the idea that Other Dad wouldn't accept him as his son too. His little boy for a different world.

A subtle look out of the corner of his left eye locked onto his heir. Shikadai had his arms crossed, the sternness that scrunched up his face made the message his son was sending loud and clear. 'Takashi is my brother now. This is _our family_ , Dad, so don't eff this up because your logic and emotions are having a pissing contest with each over your acceptance over the situation'.

Don't worry, son. This entire experience had reawakened his paternal instincts and Shikamaru had never been more gratefully.

He was going to be better father, paperwork be damned.

Their party was watching the scene with interest as Shikamaru accepted the knives. He didn't put them on though. His gaze shift from the gleaming metal back to his home. Ignoring the painful damage to his backyard (and the forest, how the fuck is he going to explain all the downed trees to the clan), he thought of how serious the situation had become.

 _Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two._

Naruto was right, he couldn't deny it any longer. This was his family now. And he was going to keep it safe. No matter what.

Well, now that the moody bit was done, let's get to work, shall we? But first, in classic fatherly Nara fashion, he needed to do some mental nudging.

"What makes you think I can use them?"

Takashi didn't appreciate Shikamaru's mind games any more than Shikadai did, it seemed, if the boy's look of 'seriously, Dad?' was anything to go by. Or 'seriously, Other Dad?', Shikamaru supposed that was more accurate now. Yet, some of the tension seemed to dissipate, as if Shikamaru's smartass comments were comforting to Takashi. Good.

"Please, I know for a fact you train with Mirai using trench knives every Thursday before you take her out to lunch." _Guilty as charged._ "And if you don't do this, then you taught her how to use them and you probably know how to use them better than she can."

"Hey!"

"No offence, Sis." Well, in that case…

He slipped his fingers through the knives. They seemed to warm, as if they were awakening from his chakra. He flexed his hand, clenching and unclenching his fist. _Hello, old friends._

"Naruto, I need a clone." Shikamaru called out before he started to pivot, slicing the wind. Just as the clone poofed to life, he attacked. "Earth Style: Fissure!"

Fissure was a devasting earth style jutsu that required too many troublesome hand signs in Shikamaru's personal opinion. Dog, Snake, Horse, Tiger, Snake, Dog, Tiger. And yes, he was too lazy to perform the hand signs half of the time. Granted, the desired results from the jutsu made it so worth it.

As he lunged to stab the earth, his eyes locked on the changing kanji as the blade pierced the earth. Instantly, the earth broke into a valley and swallowed the clone whole. Oh, yes, these blades will do just fine.

"Crap, the seal!" Takashi scrambled to double-checked the seal, before sighing in relief. "Seriously, Other Dad? Maybe you do need fuinjutsu lessons so you know not to practice jutsus next to an activate seal!" Oops, not his brightest moment. Though, it was good to see how relaxed and casual Takashi had become around him.

"Bad, Other Daddy." Very eloquent, Benihime.

"Damn, Dad…" Shikadai gawked at the rumble. "Since when do you use earth jutsus?" Always have, son, they were just too troublesome most days.

"Forget the jutsus, you fucked up the yard even more!" Temari's nagging was oddly comforting, for some unholy reason. Go figure. "How are we going to fix that?"

"I'll think of something later." Shikamaru promised as he tucked the blades away. "Remind me to get myself a pair of these when I get back." Then an impulsive idea struck him and he bit back a 'troublesome'. Clearly, he's been spent too much time around the Uzumakis.

"Actually, I'll be back in five minutes." Temari yelped as he picked her up and body flickered them back inside his office.

"What the hell's got- uhm…" Temari fell silent as he deepened the kiss.

He missed her. God, he missed her so fucking much. Her hands grasped at his neck and curled into his hair, pulling herself closer as he pushed her up against the wall. He lifted her so that he wasn't leaning over so much and she jumped, using her legs to pull him closer. He couldn't remember the last time they've kissed like this. He wanted to stay there, having the best make out session they've had in ages and do _so much more_ but he couldn't.

"I'm sorry." Shikamaru pulled away to stare into those magnificent teal eyes. "You've given up everything you had in Suna to be here and I've been a dick, a dumbass and quite possibly the worst husband in the world."

"Shika-"

"No," Ignore how beautiful she looks when flushed, Shikamaru, you have more control than this. "No, I need to finish this. You're right, I've been a coward. I've run away from you, Shikadai, everyone because I thought that would save everyone from the pain of losing the baby. No, save myself from the pain." He was choking up. "And I'm sorry because I love you. I love you, I will always love you and I don't deserve you. I never have and I never will but I'm going to make it up to you."

Temari stared at him, taking in his words and her silence was killing him. Then, one of her hands caressed his cheek before moving to the back of his neck. Gently, she pulled his head into the crook of her neck.

"Let it out." She whispered. "It's ok." And that was his undoing. She held him as he shook in her arms, crying into her. Moments passed before she spoke again.

"I'm sorry too. I've been a bitch to you."

"You haven't-"

"Hush, it's my turn to grovel, Cry Baby." He snorted tearfully, pulling up to look at her as she continued. "I know you've been under a lot of stress and I shouldn't have pushed you. I knew that you hated fighting, hated talking about the baby and I kept doing it without caring about how you felt. The fact that you still want me, after all of my nagging and bitching and being the shittiest Lady Nara in the history of your clan shows just how much I don't deserve you. We're both going to do better, together. I love you." She kissed him. "I love you." And again. "I love you." And again.

"Does this mean you guys aren't going to fight anymore?"

The parents ended the kiss, their heads whipping around to stare at their son. Shikadai kept his eyes bowed, probably so that he didn't have to see that fact that Shikamaru's hands had crept under his wife's skirt during their kissing. Yet, the boy looked and sounded hopeful. Shikamaru let Temari's legs fall before they stepped away from the wall.

"I get that Mom yelling at you is some twisted version of foreplay for you guys but can we stop with the late-night yelling and Dad crashing on Uncle Choji's couch thing you guys have been doing for years? It's troublesome." Shikadai looked up at them with a watery and tentative smile. "And it would be nice if we had dinner together more often."

Shikamaru's arms opened up as his boy crashed into him with a sob. Temari wrapped herself around them, peppering kisses onto their son.

"Whatever you want, son, whatever you want." Shikamaru promised as he stroked the trembling boy's back.

"And just for the record, young man, we don't have a twisted version of foreplay and how you even know what that is it beyond me." Temari chided softly, her heart not in the scolding.

"Yes, you do." So stubborn, that was totally Temari's side kicking in. "And Mom?"

"Yes, Shikadai?"

"Does this mean that you're going to learn the katas now? Because it's totally unfair that you don't do the traditional training with us _and_ get to sleep in."

"Hm, I guess I have been slacking on my duties, haven't I?" Temari said. "Well, when you and your father get back, you two can teach me first thing in the morning. How does that sound?"

"Awesome, actually. And Dad?"

"Hm?"

"I like have siblings. Can Ruto, Hima and I go and visit their world when this is all over?" Shikadai pleaded with him, giving them his own version of the Puppy Dog Eyes no Jutsu. The question caused Temari to snap her head up. She gave Shikamaru a shrug of 'I'm cool with it, are you?'

"I'll discuss it with their parents when we get back. Ok?"

"Ok. Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"Anything for you, Shikadai." He tightened his grip around his son. "Anything."

With that, the rescue mission (and to stop Kaguya's resurrection) began. The rescue party's arrival to the Land of Lightening was an 'illuminating' one to say the least.

"Alright, hit it Dai."

"Right." Shikadai made the rat hand sign from where the group stood at the middle of the etched Flying Thunder God seal. The kanji lit an icy blue before shifting to a platinum silver. The lines that connected the Fourth's seal bleed silver as the final part of Takashi's seal, the Uzumaki chakra circle, started spinning. The kanji of the twelve months morphed into what looked like kanji of coordinates before the white light that leaked from them burned Shikamaru's eyes. All of this happened in a span of 3 seconds.

Oh, would you look at that, they were free falling now.

"This is awesome!" He had to agree with Naruto's assessment as they fell. It was similar to that feeling Shikamaru had got when Temari tried to teach him how to balance on her fan after they had started dating more seriously. He had failed miserably (he was an earth style user for a reason) and it wasn't one of his greatest moments. But the adrenaline that he got as he fell from the sky into the lake that they were practicing over was intoxicating.

Damn, he was a masochist. Man, what a drag.

The tube that surrounded them was dark, when flash of navy and purple sparks zooming past them. At the end of the tunnel was a bright light. Their journey kind of reminded Shikamaru of sliding down the slide at the park when he was younger.

"Ow!"

"Shit!"

"Naruto, you fatass-"

Unfortunately, the dogpile landing wasn't pleasant.

"Dang, still need to fix that." Takashi groaned as he pushed himself off the ground.

"Ugh." Sakura groaned as they all stood and readjusted themselves. "This place sure brings back some shitty memories." Truer words had never been spoken. The barren landscape before them was just as haunting as it was 18 years ago.

"So, where are they? This place looks emptier than Dobe's brain."

"Oi! Shut up, Sasuke you-" Not even five minutes into this rescue mission and Team 7 was already fighting. Brilliant…

"Are they always like this?" Takashi whispered to his fellow young Nara.

"Yep."

"Naruto, stop wasting our time!" Sakura bopped (aka punching six feet under) the Seventh Hokage over the head. Again, another unholy scene that should not be comforting by normal standards.

"But Sakura-"

"Seriously, Dai. This is really fucking weird." Takashi hissed as the Nara men watched Team 7 fall into one of their normal squabbles. "I don't know what's weird, Uncle Sasuke talking or Guy Mom being used as Aunt Sakura's punching bag."

"Language, Takashi." Shikamaru scolded as he resisted the urge to light a cigarette. He didn't, however, resist the urge to roll his eyes. "Oi, guys."

Team 7 froze before blinking and looking back at the Nara men as if they had forgotten that they were there.

"If you three are done fighting like cats and dogs, we've got a time limit on our hands." Shikamaru reminded as his head tilted up towards the moon. Midnight was approaching. "We need to-"

" **Huh, Naruto was right. The beard was a good decision."**

Shikamaru stiffened as ruby red fox eyes roomed up and down his form. His Hokage didn't look any different but those weren't his eyes and that voice was significantly lower and rougher than Naruto's has ever been. Kurama.

"Naruto?" Sakura asked as she cracked her knuckles. Instantly, Sasuke's blade shined as he whipped it out. The blade rested on 'Naruto's' neck.

"What did you do with Dobe, Fox?"

" **Now, now."** Kurama waved indifferently. **"Don't act so shock. Me in this world could do this if he wanted to. He just chooses not to. Something about not wanting to anger little Himawari."** Scratch that, Kurama from Girl Naruto's dimension.

"Hello, Kurama." Shikamaru greeted, earning a pleased eyebrow from the sealed Biju.

" **The differences between you and my kit's mate is truly minimal, I see. That's good. Very good. Though."** Naruto's face crunched in scrutiny as Kurama continued his inspection. **"You aren't Awaken."**

"So?" Shikamaru knew that he was dancing with the devil with his question, especially when that foxy smirk ripped into view.

" **You choose not to be Awaken."**

It was like a bucket of ice water had been dumped over him. He couldn't move, couldn't answer and the smug fox knew it.

"How do you know that?" Shikadai, his stubborn little boy, demanded. Shikamaru could only watch as his son moved in front of him. His heir glared back Kurama with crossed arms.

"Yeah, Kurama." Takashi moved to stand at Shikadai's side. They were shielding him. "Other Dad didn't even know about any of this until a few days ago."

It was odd, watching Kurama's mannerisms with Naruto's body. Kurama somehow made Naruto look even taller than he already was. Naruto's lids were nearly shut, only allowing for shimmers of red to leak through. Lethargic wasn't the right word to describe the posture of the Biju. Carefree, perhaps?

" **Stand down, Baby Kits. I come in peace."** Kurama smirked, raising his hands up. **"All jokes besides, there was a reason I came back."**

The Uchihas glanced at each other before Sasuke inched the sword away. Only be an inch, mind you. Shikamaru locked eyes with Kurama. The chakra beings smirked grew wider as he reached out to grab his sons' shoulders. The boys looked up at him as pulled them behind him. Shikamaru raised his chin up and tsked.

"What's the reason?" 'Naruto's' arm rose as his index finger pointed at Sakura's chest. Her husband tensed but Sakura's hand on his sword arm to keep the blade from decapitating their Hokage. Just imagine trying to example that to Hinata. The horror.

" **Haruno's a fuinjutsu mistress."** Oh, perfect, of course she is.

"Aw man." Takashi facepalmed. "Taka, you idiot, literally the proof was staring right in front you." Shikadai gave him a supportive pat on the back.

" **Oh, and I should probably tell you that they've started using Other Blond Baby Kit's eye to find Kaguya. Got to go, bye!"**

"Woah, head rush. Oi, Sasuke, what's with the sword to the neck?! We've talked about this! Point swords at people is not the answer!" Oh, look, Naruto's back.

"Shut up and find them. We're running out of time."

"Yeah, yeah, Bastard, don't get your panties in a twist." Naruto said as he closed his eyes. Two heart beats passed before he opened them again in sage mode. "They stopped moving, northeast of us. Follow me, hurry!"

As the mountainous terrain seemed to grow taller and taller with every step they took, Shikamaru's mind brought back those memories of the war. The reanimation of Kakazu and Asuma, his father's death, him and his clansmen trying to hold down the Ten-Tails. He remembers his chakra being sucked out of him by the God Tree. He remembers Sakura trying and failing to pump more and more chakra back into him.

He nearly died then. It had been painful.

It had been eye-opening.

It had been embarrassing.

He tried not to think about it, really, he did. In his semi-dying haze, he had thought about his guilt over letting Naruto live that horrible and lonely of childhood and about how he did nothing about. About Naruto's uncanny charisma and forgiveness that quite frankly, Konoha didn't deserve. About how he was going to make it up to Naruto and stand at his Hokage's side as his loyal advisor.

All of these private thoughts that Ino had sent out to the entire Shinobi Alliance forces with her Mind Transformation Jutsu. Troublesome woman.

Ugh, if word gets out to the other Kages about the Nara Uzumaki kids, they probably will start thinking that something fishy was going on. And for the record, no, they were not having an affair and Kiba is a dead man the next time he sees him. Man, what a drag.

And beside all of that was the Infinite Tsukuyomi. The genjutsu was beautiful form of torture. It showed its victims whatever their hearts desired. The visions were so realistic, just an arm's length from his grasp. Asuma and his father were still alive. His mother nagging affectionately, Kurenai cuddling Mirai lovingly. Temari standing with him in Konoha, watching the scene unfold, her hand reaching for his. He didn't want it to end.

 _ **Boy… It's not…**_

 _ **You are… Fe… Yin…**_

 _ **Listen to me… Shikamaru…**_

 _ **You are stronger… Damn stealing bas…**_

 _ **FIGHT IT!**_

He remembers the voice of a woman, calling out from the darkness that the genjutsu tried hide from him. At first, he had thought that it was his mother. Except, the tone had been a deeper, rawer pitch and he didn't want to find out who the voice that had stolen his perfect world belonged to. He remembers his heart breaking as shadows had consumed the vision. Those shadows, they had eaten away at the corners of his vision, slowly eroding away the world where he didn't lose anyone. And then, there was only shadows, darkness, and a burning, golden glare.

 _ **So close… So close…**_

 _ **WAKE UP!**_

And it was over. The genjutsu had broken and the war was over.

Life moved on and Shikamaru had forgotten all about that nagging voice, which he was now sure had belonged to Shika Nara, the founder of the Nara clan. And now, he couldn't forget her words.

"How much closer are we?" Takashi's question jolted him out of his thoughts.

"We're closing in fast." Naruto reassured but his face gave away his worry. The moon was nearly directly above them. Then, they reached the gigantic valley. The team shielded themselves from view. Shikamaru peered over the edge as he watched Zetsu's arm sink into earth, Boruto and Psycho Haruno several yards away from him. Shikamira was trapped in her own wooden bird cage next to her mother. Her arm was stretched out between the bars, reaching out for Boruto. He could taste the toxic chakra that leaked through hole in the earth as the spiderweb like chakra lines expanded throughout the valley.

The earth rumbled as the chakra lines pulsed. The hole expanded as Zetsu pulled up iron chains. The alien jumped up, the chains clanking as they heaved up gated doors. They were the size of Konoha's main gate. The door on the left was snow white with the kanji for yang (陽) carved into it. The door on the right was pitch black with the kanji for yin (陰). Both doors were bound shut by chains. In the center of doors was a lock where the chains sprouted out from. On the lock was the kanji for heaven (天国). The earth closed as the gates hovered a few feet off of the ground. More purple chakra leaked out. It was suffocating.

"So that's what it looks like." Naruto muttered.

"What should we do?" Takashi asked quietly as they watched Boruto move to his feet. While they were far away, Shikamaru's eyes locked onto the yin door. Under its carved kanji, he could make out small cracks in the metallic material of the door. Not completely broken but slightly shattered, kind of like breaking a window but all of the pieces remaining in the window frame. _I see, that's how he got out._

Zetsu turned to face his companion before smirking at the caged Lady Hokage. They were running out of time. But he had a plan.

"Well, Shikamaru?" Naruto nudged him with his bony elbow. Blue eyes twinkled with respect and trust. Now was not the time to disappoint. "Got a plan?"

"Sasuke, Sakura, you'll be on Psycho Haruno. Distract her, force her out of the valley, doesn't matter. Make sure that she's away from Zetsu." The plan rolled out of him as gray light started to emit from the doors. "Naruto and I will go after Zetsu."

"What about us, Dad?" Shikadai asked as Takashi's chakra chains started to wrap themselves around his forearms. Shikamaru locked eyes with his best friend, boss, brother. In that moment, they were in total agreement. They could do this. They would protect their family.

Shikamaru pulled out his counterpart's trench knives. The cool blades were comforting. He looked to his sons and smirked as the boys blinked at him in realization. In sync, they looked at Naruto, who nodded back at them. The boys looked at each before a wicked grin mirrored each other. They would do just fine.

 _Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two._ Don't worry, Nara. They've got this.

"Let's go."

 **Author's Note - Well guys, what do you think? Man, even though this chapter was a drag to write (ha, Nara humor), I actually really like how this turned out. I decided to do the POVs with Naruto 2.0 and Canon Shikamaru because I wanted to give them some more development. Especially poor Canon Shika because the only POV he's had in this fic doesn't even show the awesomeness that is Shikamaru Nara. I know, stupid on my part but whatever. Also, side note, Naruto 2.0's section was a little dysfunctional, chaotic and rambly but that's what I was going for. And fun fact, vixens are actually in heat for one to six days, which makes their reproductive cycle twelve months long! So those jokes about Naruto 2.0 always being in heat are actually fact-based (who knew). And as for Canon Shikamaru, again, I wanted to show his over analyzing brain in action as well as his emotions because as we all know, Shikamaru doesn't do emotions well. Lastly, to make up for the longish wait. I left you guys a present below! I hope you guys like it! Let me know your thoughts in the reviews! Don't forget to favorite and follow! (Also hell yay, 160 followers and counting! Guys, we are one of the top Shikadai fics! I'm not joking, we're on the first page if you search Shikadai fics in English, all rating and by followers! It's all thanks to you guys!) Love you guys so much!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**

* * *

 _Benihime_

"Alright girls, we've got a mission! Hima, did you find the papers?"

"Yep! They were right where you thought that they would be." Himawari said as she waved the papers in her tiny fist. She frowned. "But a lot of these words are _really_ hard to read..." Motoko tilted her head up in confusion.

"I thought Taka said you weren't supposed to use fuinjutsu, Beni." Benihime reached out to pat the top of Motoko's head. Oh Momo, so much she still had to learn.

"But Momo, I thought that you wanted to help." Beni reminded with a chirp. Motoko gave an adorable nod.

"I do."

"Well I think that the only way we can help is with fuinjutsu!" The redhead crossed her arms and gave a seriously cute nod. "Besides, this is for Other Daddy and Miss Temari, remember?" That was all that it took to bring Motoko completely on board for their super-secret mission.

"Perfect!" Beni clapped. "Hima, when's Granny supposed to be back?"

"Well-"

"NARUTO UZUMAKI, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOU'LL NEED MORE THAN JUST ONE FAKE ARM!"

"Yay! Granny's home!" Hima cheered before she grabbed Beni and Motoko's hands and started dragging them to the Sannin. "Granny! You have to meet Beni and Momo!"

* * *

 **P.S. - You guys have no idea how happy I am that Tsunade is still alive in Canon.**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	18. Uzumaki Luck 101, Don't Question It

**Author's Note - Well peeps, we're almost there but again my writer's block kicked up so Canon Naruto kicking some ass will be the entirety of the chapter 19 (I'm even pinky promising it to show you guys just how serious I am). Anyway, I added another POV to this story because I needed to write cracky filler to break my writer's block and it somehow managed to wiggle its way into the plot because that's how I roll. But again, this chapter is important and yes, we have some action. What else? You know what, I'll let you guys read and find out. Warning though, another sub-plot that I've had in my head since the conception of this fic is rooted in this chapter so yeah, you've been warned. Ok, enough with the author's note. On to the story!**

Chapter 18: Uzumaki Luck 101, Don't Question It

 _Shikamira_

It's official. Mom's luck is literally the best and worst thing that has ever happened to Shikamira in her young life.

"Boruto!" Mira screamed in horror as she saw her new blonde brother perform a lovely impersonation of a stuffed animal from a claw machine. She could only watch as he got smaller and smaller the higher the claw pulled him. Even with her chakra open again, she had never felt more useless.

"No…" She watched as the claws grip on Boruto's jacket didn't lax and yet- he looked like he was falling!

His jacket was ripping!

Mira forced her sore body to start moving into position try and caught him. Move, move, move dammit!

Expect it wasn't necessary because the clam readjust its grip on him, holding him like it was about to throw him.

Wait, what?!

"GOODBYE SWEET WORLD!" Boruto screamed as the claw threw him towards Zetsu and Psycho Haruno. It was like that time she had convinced Kenji to be her test dummy for that giant slingshot she had created back at the academy. Unfortunately for Boruto, there was no Taka there to caught him before he went splat!

Nope, she couldn't look.

"AHHHH!"

"Kid, shut up." Mira peeked through one hand and blinked like an owl.

Psycho Haruno had saved Boruto? The fuck? But there he was, perfectly fine besides his ripped jacket, tucked under the woman's right arm like a bag of sugar.

"Put him down, Sakura." At Mr. I'm-Yin-It's-Purest-Form's (insert eye-roll here) order, her ex-aunt dropped Boruto. Mira winced in twin (but not actually a twin, but that was a minor detail) sympathy as Boruto rubbed his sore ass.

And then, he glared up at their capturers and Mira had no problem saying that his glare relaxed her. It was a pure Uzumaki glare, like the ones Taka used to throw at Sarada's bullies after she was recovered enough to return at the academy. It promised pure Uzumaki chaos headed their way as Boruto was shooed towards the alien-blob-thingy.

Ha! Mira tried to bite back her laughter when Ruto slouched. Hands stuffed in his pockets, feet shuffling, his mouth releasing a yawn as he approached Zetsu.

"Sup." It was so Nara that it was just perfect. Imprisoned beside her, Mom snorted while Mira smirked so broadly that she was sure that he could feel how proud she was of him. Zetsu stare harshly back at him before glancing at Psycho Sakura.

"You sure you grabbed the right blonde?" He had fooled Zetsu with his acting? She was so proud!

"Of course, I did!" Psycho Haruno actually sounded offended at her husband's accusation. "It has whisker marks." If the situation wasn't so grave, Mira would have giggled at the absolutely insulted look that littered the blond boy's face. Note to self, tease Boruto for his whiskers when they weren't kidnapped.

"Ah, yes, you're right." Zetsu ignored his wife's grumbling to glowered down at Boruto. "Activate it."

"Nope." Good move, Ruto, use Sass no Jutsu to aggravate your opponent. Works every time. Mr. Blob raised an eyebrow at his answer and questioned,

"And why not?"

"I can't control it. Duh." Way to state the obvious, Ruto. Though, it seems that Zetsu wasn't very pleased with his answer given how the ground surrounding Boruto became wooden spikes of doom (Duh, duh, DUH).

"Activate it or die." Geeze, bipolar much, Mr. Blobby.

"What's the magic word?" Yes, Boruto, use the power of the sass.

"Now, you little shit." _Maybe he overused Sass no Jutsu just a little_. Just as Ruto was about to become Swiss cheese, Psycho Haruno coughed and snapped her fingers, a purple glow encasing her right hand. From her cage, Mira couldn't tell what had happened but the majority of the wooden spikes retracted back. Zetsu glowered at his companion.

"You couldn't have done that sooner?" Psycho Haruno activated Boruto's Kekkei Genkai? _That shouldn't be possible_ , Mira narrowed her eyes as she tried to pinpoint a difference on Boruto's body, unless…

Minus the now ruined jacket, the boy looked fine. There was no deformation to his body. No extra marks. No seals. Not even a bruise. So how-

 _ **You can't see it, girl. She's good at what she does. Your mother taught her too well.**_ Mira flinched before whipping her head around. No one, there was absolutely no one who could have said those words. Not even Mom had moved or spoken. Then who-

 _ **You are far smarter than this, Shikamira. I've always been with you, just like I have been with your father since he became Awakened.**_ No way…

"You didn't ask." Psycho Haruno shrugged as she pushed the remaining spikes away from Boruto's left side. Her hand clamped down on the back of his neck. He looked up to glare at her. With a force that could have easily snapped his neck, Boruto was forced him to look back out into the valley. Immediately, Mira's mood soured at the sight of Ruto being manhandled.

"What do you see, kid? Time's a wasting." Boruto flinched in fury as he snapped at Psycho Haruno,

"Why should I tell you anything, you crazy-"

"Boruto!" Mira whipped over to look at Mom. Her mother had that look again, that guilty one she got when she was scared over the idea of any of them getting hurt and blamed herself for the situation. "Do as they say, Boruto. It's ok."

No, it wasn't ok, Mira wanted to yell back. This whole situation wasn't ok! How dare Zetsu and Psycho Sakura do this to her family! Mira didn't care that they wanted to sacrifice her body to Kaguya (honestly, that was the thing she was the least upset about). But how dare they kidnap her mother and Boruto! How dare they force Ruto to do their bidding! How dare they make Mom feel overly guilty for something that wasn't her fault! How dare they hurt her family! How dare they! Mira wanted to scream! She wanted to strangle them with her shadows! She wanted to show them the pointy ends of her katanas! She wanted, she wanted-

Mira slammed her fists against the bars of her cage in anger. Her forehead rested against her fists, her eyes locked on the miniscule seals etched to her wrists that had betrayed her in her time of need.

She just wanted to do something.

"Listen to your mommy, kid."

"It's Dad Mom. Get it right." Mira pulled herself up to look at Boruto as his correction soared through the valley. Her heart warmed. He probably had no idea how much his nickname for Mom meant to her. "What am I looking for, anyway?"

"Where is the most concentrated source of chakra?" Zetsu asked.

She watched as Boruto scanned the area, his muscles tense. He froze as his head faced an area off to his right side. He found it.

"Over there. About 50 yards to the right of us. You can't miss it." Mira's eyes followed to where he was pointing. She gulped. Her gut was telling her that area was more than just a pile of rocks. The Uzumaki boy flinched as the madwoman's hand latched out to his neck again. She started pushing him towards the area.

"After you."

All Mira could do was watch as Boruto led their capturers farther and farther away from her. She couldn't hear what they were saying now. Mira spared a glance at her mother. It wasn't right, seeing Mom all chained and powerless. Useless, Mira scoffed and forced herself to look away. Useless, useless, useless-

 _ **Girl, stop sulking in self-pity! You are a Nara and an Uzumaki!**_ Mira could practically see Shika Nara's golden, glaring eyes as the dead woman continued barking in her mind. _**Now think! Your mother has given you the key! Look at your surroundings and follow your instincts!**_

So many questions swarmed Mira's brain. Questions like, are all Nara women destined to be naggers? Had she finally gone bonkers (it was bound to happen)? Or-

 _ **GIRL!**_

Geeze, fine. Save questions for when you aren't about to be taken over by Mama Alien. Got it.

Mira's eyes scanned the area outside of her cage. Nope, nothing. Hey, Mom, how's it hanging? Still nothing. No-

 _Shine._

Her eyes locked with the piece of metal that sparkled in the moonlight. It was small and compact and – It could fit on a wrist!

Ruto's Kote!

The thing most have fallen out when the claw/cage thingy threw him. Mira peeked over to where Ruto had taken Zetsu and Psycho Haruno. Their backs were to her. Without second thought, Mira twisted herself. Tree bark rubbed against her cheek as she tried to force her right arm to stretch between the bars. Come on, come on, come-

GOT IT!

Just as her hand closed over the tool, the earth shook violently. Sapphire eyes widen as she took in the scene before her. Had there had been a gigantic purply hole there earlier? Then the killing intent rushed through the valley as Zetsu dug his arm into the hole.

"Eeck!" Mira hissed and bit the inside of her cheek to steel her nerves. Don't drop the Kote, Mira! Next to her, Mom snarled as her chains forced her to stand.

The chains pulled the woman's arms from her back, forcing them up into crucifixion. Mom's head snapped up then down from the whiplash with a sickening sound. Mira was about to cry out when the Lady Hokage's head shot up again. Red flickered through the woman's eyes before their beautiful baby blues returned. Before Mira could question what had happened, Zetsu pulled his arm out.

Purple chakra lines that definitely wasn't there earlier erupted through the valley. It was like they were trapped in a giant spiderweb and Ruto was at the center of it. The hole expanded as Zetsu pulled up iron chains. The alien jumped up, the chains clanking as they heaved up gated doors. They were the size of Konoha's main gate. The door on the left was snow white with the kanji for yang (陽) carved into it. The door on the right was pitch black with the kanji for yin (陰). Both doors were bound shut by chains. In the center of doors was a lock where the chains sprouted out from. On the lock was the kanji for heaven (天国). The earth closed as the gates hovered a few feet off of the ground. More purple chakra leaked out. It was suffocating.

"Woah…" Her word echoed throughout the deathly silent valley before Mom hissed out.

"So that's what she was sealed away with. Sixth Path Planetary Devastation."

Mira's eyes locked on the yin door. Under its carved kanji, she could make out small cracks in the metallic material of the door. Not completely broken but slightly shattered, kind of like breaking a window but all of the pieces remaining in the window frame. Is that where Zetsu broke lose?

Her eyes never leaving the gates, Mira's fingers fumbled with the Kote. The memory of her dad opening the tool aided with her task as she was able to pluck the mini scroll out of the tool with one hand. She scanned her surroundings, her fingers wedging the scroll open. A quick glance at the scroll and, praise whatever deity was out there because now they had a trick up their sleeve. Mira probably looked like the doe she was named after. Seriously, her eyes were that big in disbelief.

Huh, maybe Mom's luck wasn't so bad afterall. Quickly, she fixed the tool until it was as good as new.

"At last." Smirking, Zetsu raised his arms to the gate. "You will live again, Mother." He turned his head up at the moon. It was almost directly above them. They were running out of time.

"Throw the brat back into the cage." Zetsu turned to stare down Mom. "Shall we begin, Lady Hokage?"

Boruto winced at the vice grip that Pyscho Haruno had on his upper forearm. Mira's eyes widened, her fist hiding away the Kote as the ex-medic manhandled Ruto over to their cage. They didn't get far when the earth shaking again, pulling everyone's attention back to the doors.

The door screeched as the doors pushed against their chains, creating an opening while keeping hits. A blinding gray light started leaking out of the slim opening. The light seemed to bubble before solidifying into a gigantic hand. The hand resembled that of a skeleton before it stretched and-

Mommy screamed.

"NO!" The Fertile with Yin girl and the boy with the Unknown Kekkei Genkai screamed in horror.

Mira's seen a lot of shit happen in her life. Until today, she truly didn't think that there was anything worse than the anguished roar that Dad released after Mom got kidnapped after Mira's Chunin Exams. He fought like an animal, taking his fury out on Kinshiki Otsutsuki before the bastard escaped too and Dad just looked so lost. That look of defeat that he wore must be the one that Mira was wearing now.

There stood her Mommy, crucified in wood, the skeleton hand piercing her through her stomach. Straight through her cage and seal. She wasn't bleeding but it didn't make the situation any less horrifying. A gray light encased Mom before the arm started to pulled.

The Lady Hokage howled and growled, her muscles flexing against her constraints. Her whisker marker became harsher, her nails lengthening, her teeth sharpening. Orange chakra started to leak out of the woman. It mixed with the gray light, battling it for dominance. Kurama's chakra was being pulled right out of her.

"Resistant is futile, Milady." Zetsu chided as a wall of wood stopped Boruto's sprint towards Mom. "Mother will live again and there is nothing that can stop it."

Mom, wincing in pain, forced her eyes open. The feral ruby gaze smirked up at the alien.

A giant holographic sword of chakra swung down, slicing through the gray arm. Mom sighed in relief as the rest of the arm and hand evaporated, revealing the hole in her dress. Her seal was visible and the skin under it didn't reveal any of the abuse it had just suffered.

"MULTI SHADOW CLONE JUTSU!"

Zetsu and Pyscho Haruno spilt apart as thousand of Guy Mom's clones fell from the sky like cats and dogs. One of Guy Mom's clones scooped up Boruto. One second later, he was body-flickered and sat in front of Mira's cage.

"Dad?" Boruto asked and his father's clone smiled and winked at him.

"Take care of your sister, Boruto." The clone turned, joining back into the fray. Pyscho Haruno groaned as she dodged her way through the plethora of clones.

"You've got to be shitting m-"

"SHANNARO!" Sane Sakura heaved what could have been a mini mountain over her head and slammed it towards her counterpart. Naturally, Pyscho punched through the mountain only for Uncle Sasuke to come soaring through the crack, his Susanoo armor retracking back. His blade screamed with crackling lightning. Psycho Haruno spun like a top, barely dodging the blade, her long hair getting trimmed. She retreated, running towards Mira's cage only for Sane Sakura to block her exit.

"Oh no you don't!" Sane Sakura's uppercut collided with her counterpart's bare stomach. She flew in the air, the blood trickling down her chin. Uncle Sasuke body-flickered next to the traitor, slamming his right heel into her back. The sound barrier broke before she was launched into the earth, cratering it.

"Woah…" Mira and Boruto watched in awe as the Uchihas' did a full frontal on Psycho Haruno, who struggled to push herself out of her mud print when Sane Sakura was on top of her again.

Sarada's birth mother had fiery blue chakra surrounding her fists as the two counterparts entered into a taijutsu brawl that would make Lee-Sensei weep at its beautiful youthfulness. Psycho Haruno pushed back the majority of the punches when Uncle Sasuke, looking like a complete badass, straight up kicked Psycho Sakura in the face as Sane Sakura landed a punch on their enemy's left cheek. Man, you should have seen her flying. It was beautiful. Sadly, the ass-kicking by the Uchihas' pushed Psycho Haruno out of the valley and away from view.

"Guys!" Taka and Dai landed in front of her cage. Thankfully, all of Guy Mom's clones were covering them beautifully so that they didn't have to worry about being caught in the fray. While the relief of being with Taka again was rather calming, her twin just had this way of pushing her buttons at the worst of times.

"Hey Sis, how's it hanging?" Like now, with his stupid smirk. The glare Mira sent his way showed just how much she appreciated her twin's smartass commentary.

"Oh, you know, just about to be sacrificed to an alien. The usual. No need to hurry up and well, get me out of here, you dumbass!" Not that she needed rescuing but still, it was the principle of the matter.

"Told you she'd nag me." Taka's groan cause Shikadai to snicker before the newest Awaken Nara (a very exclusive club that she was the vice president of, thank you very much) gave Boruto a raised eyebrow.

"Boruto, your eye-"

"Yeah, still got no idea on how to control it." Ruto shrugged, totally cool with the fact that he had a glow ball for an eye. "I'm just going to roll with it." Taka twitched into his thinking face before pondering,

"Maybe I could create a seal to help control that?" Shikadai and Boruto sent him incredulous looks.

"You can do that?"

"Of course, I-" They had forgotten about her. Typical.

WOOSH!

Blink, blink.

There was nothing more priceless than seeing a speechless Nara man. Getting to see two speechless Nara men plus an Uzumaki, jackpot. Mira stepped through the charred circle she had made in her wooden cage. Whistling, she tossed the Kote up in the air. The tool flipped over itself before she caught it and smirked at her brothers.

As always, her badassery had left them dumbstruck. All in the life of Shikamira Nara.

"You could have gotten out of there this entire time?!" Boruto whined.

"Correction, you could have gotten us out of there this entire time." Mira ignored various explosions going on around them. Oh would you look at that, Other Dad was playing exploding shadow tag against an another army of puppet shinobi. Wonderful. "This is Taka's Kote, the one that Mom wrote in and that Taka's been messing with. Mom gave it to Ruto so that he could give it to Taka before she left to go explore the village, remember? Before Aunt Hinata freaked out over Ichiro. You just never did." Taka slumped in disbelief.

"Don't tell me-"

"Yep, Mom's luck streaks again. We should all be grateful for Mom's luck and it's impeccable timing."

"But- but-" Ruto started to stutter like his mother. Taka patted the fellow blonde's shoulder in sympathy.

"How is that even possible?" Dai questioned as he slouched in skepticism. The twins just shrugged at him.

"We've learned to stop questioning Mom's luck after Dad told us about the time when she gambled her way to paying off Konoha's debt in one night using Oto's money."

"What-"

"MOVE!" Boruto's screamed caused the quartet to scattered as wooden claws erupted from the earth where they once stood. Naturally, the hands decided to chase after her instead of the boys. Again, typical.

Mira flicked her right wrist, the familiar unsealing of her katana cushioning her palm. As she ran, she moved her katana so that she could see her reflection and her pursuers in the metal. The sturdy blade's side shined in the moonlight. Its kanji blurred before shifting. Tiger.

Fire Style: Majestic Flame Jutsu!

She sucked in air before exhaling it onto her blade. Flames danced against the blade before blackening. Turning on her toes, Mira slashed her sword down. The wooden menaces cut like butter. A chard and blackened butter, but butter nonetheless.

Mira didn't have time to react when she was pulled away. Taka was so fucking luck that she was used to him manhandling her out of danger or she totally would have stabbed him.

And yes, it's happened before.

They flickered over behind a ridge that Dai and Ruto were using as coverage, only to gap at the scene that had unfolded in the valley below. It was like the Nara forest had been picked up and dropped in the middle of the desert. The gates that hovered above it made the tension all the more ominous. Through the trees, Mira could make out the sight of Zetsu running, new trees growing with every step that he took. Guy Mom's clones were giving chase, barreling through the wood with ease. The earth quaked as a third of the forest caved at Other Dad's feet. Other Dad was rushing around and yelling orders at an army of Guy Mom's clones, guarding Mom's cage from puppet shinobi while deforesting the fake Senju wood. Mira's gaze zoned in on the weapons that Other Dad was using.

"Are those-"

"Dad's knives, yep." Taka shrugged. "It wasn't like Dad was going to be able to use them anyway." Not going to be- Oh no.

"Don't tell me-" She was almost too afraid to ask.

"Yep."

"Dammit, Dad." Mira groaned in disbelief and worry. "This is why Mom is the impulsive one. How bad is it?" Taka winced.

"Emergency Seal Bad."

"Well shit. Dad, you genius idiot."

"Guys, as much as I would love to talk about how much our dad is both a genius and an idiot," Shikadai interrupted with a drawl. "maybe we should be discussing ways to get us all out of here. Preferably not in body bags." Boruto raised an eyebrow at his best friend.

"I swear, you've been way sassier since the twins arrived." Of course Dai was sassier than usual, Ruto. Naras thrive off of each other's sassiness. This was common knowledge.

"Seriously, you want to discuss that now?" Dai deadpanned.

"Ok, Dai's right." Mira interrupted, her eyes turning up towards the moon. Almost midnight. "We need to get Mom out of that cage. Guys, did Other Dad think of any plans?" Dad's mini-clones/sons shared a glance before nodding.

"The Uchihas are to keep Pyscho Sakura occupied and out of the valley." Dai started. "As long as she's not here, she can't do those stupid barriers. Dad and Lord Seventh are to take down Zetsu."

"Or occupy him for as long as possible." Taka rolled his shoulders. "Which leaves us with rescue and gate-sealing, which going to be a huge pain in the ass."

"How though?" The kunoichi glared up at the gate before her eyes widen. "Ruto, what do you see when you look at the yin door?"

They waited as Boruto inspected the gate. His activated eye looked almost like the pupil zooming in and out. His whiskered cheeks twitched before he frowned.

"That crack…" He started to mutter, pulling himself higher on the ridge to get a better view. Ruto looked down at Zetsu, then back at the yin door. "That's it!"

"What is?" The Naras asked as Ruto jumped back down.

"The chakra lines in the gate are weaved together with large balls of chakra in random spots. Those balls of chakra send energy throughout the gate." Taka raised an eyebrow.

"Kind of like the Eight Gates?" Boruto nodded before continuing.

"Without those balls of chakra, the lines don't have enough energy to keeps the gates closed. There's a huge gap in the yin door right were the crack is. So if we can replace the ball of chakra-"

"We can seal the gate. Perfect! Good job, Ruto!" Ruto beamed at her praise while Dai's thinking face came into view. He looked back at Zetsu, who was trying his best to capture Guy Mom (and was failing miserably, might she add). Dai smirked.

"I think I found the perfect ball of chakra. Mira, Taka, how good are you guys at trapping?" The twins grinned at each other.

"Leave that to us." Taka promised.

"Perfect, Ruto, we're going to get Auntie out of the bird cage while they go hunting." Ruto nodded, the determination leaking out of them. Mira release her lightning katana. The blade hummed in her left hand before it pinged in her chakra system. She felt the chakra around her and gasped in shock. The boys looked at her in worry.

"What happened?" Taka asked, which she ignored as she glared at Ruto in hurt.

How dare he.

"What did you do?" Dai hissed. Ruto shrugged, the sweat dripping. Her glare hardened as she stabbed her blades into the ground before her. She reached out and promptly started to shake Boruto like rag doll.

"Why didn't you tell me you were a lightning type?!" The boys sweatdropped as she continued her rant. "Do you know how many jutsu we could have made using your eye and my brain?!"

"Woah, Mira, chill." Don't tell her to chill, Taka. This was important! Well, to her, anyway. "Focus. The parental units need us." As if to prove his point, an explosion ripped through the valley. Guy Mom flew through the smoke and slammed his way through the forest. Ouch. That had to hurt.

"Fine," Mira dropped Ruto, who sighed in relief. "we'll deal with that later." Mira ripped her lightning blade out of the earth and tossed it at Ruto. The blonde juggled the blade with wide eyes.

"Hey, you could have stabbed me!" So dramatic. "What makes you think I know kenjutsu?"

"Call it a hunch. Don't break it. Alright boys. Move out!"

 _Hinata_

If Hinata was going to be honest with herself, Naruto's looks weren't the first things that caught her attraction. It was his bright determination, his 'I say that it's going to happen and it will happen, believe it' attitude and confidence that created her crush on him, all those years ago. Sure, as he got older, like after war, she was definitely attracted to and appreciated his more _toned_ and _manly_ aspects. But before that, her attraction had always been his personality and never his looks.

At first, she thought it was because of his boldness. His hair was blinding, his clothes were loud, even his whisker marks made him stand out in the crowd. Frankly, he stuck out like a sore thumb. Thus, it was odd that no matter how much her younger self tried to image it, she couldn't picture what Naruto would look like as an adult. Not even pictures of the Fourth could help her imagination. Nonetheless, Hinata fell more in love with her Naruto, got her dream wedding, learned about the magnificence of good sex and had two beautiful babies. Life was good and her old wonders no longer mattered.

"NARUTO UZUMAKI, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOU'LL NEED MORE THAN JUST ONE FAKE ARM!"

Until this past week.

After ensuring that the village was ready for war, again, the remainder of Konoha 11 returned to the Nara compound only to find a confused and angry Sannin at their doorsteps. Tsunade was not taking the news well, not that Hinata could blame her. It was rather mindboggling. It helped that the Nara Uzumaki kids were here as proof.

Speaking of the kids-

"Granny! You have to meet Beni and Momo!" Hinata watched with her team as her baby led the smallest dimension hoppers, who really should all be in bed, to the Lady Fifth. Hinata was so grateful towards those two for becoming Himawari's friends. Poor Himawari was having trouble making friends that were her own age, always wanting to be with Boruto and his friends. Back to the situation at hand, Tsunade did a double-take, rubbing her eyes before staring at the girls.

"No fucking way…" The Sannin said as she shifted to stare at their father, who remained comatose on sofa. Motoko frowned an adorable little frown.

"Granny, you know that that is a bad word." The littlest Nara Uzumaki tsked softly before she approached Tsunade. The elder froze as the baby wrapped her arms around the woman's leg and squeezed gently. Tsunade only had time to look up at Hinata in a plea for help when Benihime launched herself forward. Only the woman's amazing instincts stopped her from stumbling back as Benihime bearhugged her.

"Hi, Ruto's and Hima's Granny! I'm Benihime Nara Uzumaki and this is my little sister, Motoko! Wow, you look so young and a lot like Mommy! Mommy and Mira and Ruto are in trouble and Daddy messed with fuinjutsu again-"

"Which he's not allowed to do."

"Motoko's right, Granny! Daddy's not allowed to mess with seals and now he's sleeping again, lazy Daddy! Oh, and Taka and Dai and Other Daddy and Guy Mommy are-"

"Benihime." Temari walked up to them with a bitten back smile. It was hard not to be amused by Benihime. "Are you being troublesome?"

"Me?! Troublesome?! Never!" Temari shook her head with a chuckle before plucking both of the girls off of Tsunade. The Suna woman slug them onto each hip before smirking at the twitching Sannin.

"It's way past both of your bedtimes. Come on, Yoshino's finished making your beds." Temari scolded softly as both of the girls tensed and looked over at their father.

"But Miss Temari, Granny didn't look Daddy over yet! We can't leave until we know that he's ok." Benihime whined as Motoko pouted.

"Don't worry, girls." Hinata comforted as she nudged Himawari to follow Temari, who whined under her breath about how unfair it was that Boruto got to stay up past his bedtime. Oh Himawari, her little teenager. "Granny's going to look him over."

"Promise?" They whimpered so softly that Hinata felt her heart breaking. Oh, poor babies. The whimpers snapped Tsunade out of her daze. The older woman stared at the girls, whose big eyes were so much like Naruto's that it must have triggered Tsunade's grandmaternal instincts.

"Yes, girls. I'll look him over. I promise." Tsunade's gentle words eased the girls who nodded before waving over Temari's shoulders.

"Night, Granny! Night Aunt Hinata!" Beni called out, drowning out her sister's whisper of "Nightie, night." Tsunade waited until they were gone before turning to Hinata. The disturbed shock was plain for all to see.

"A girl Naruto and Shikamaru?"

"Yep."

"And those two-"

"Are the youngest of four. The two eldest are twins that are Boruto and Shikadai's age." Hinata explained in a nonchalantly tone. In all honesty, Hinata should have been freaking out more. She should have been more disturbed. She should have been jealous. But she wasn't because she could see it.

Comparing Naruto's younger, pre-war self to his female counterpart, Hinata could remember the softness in features. The big blue eyes, the heart-faced face, the slim neck. They had all been there on the now missing woman and it answered so many questions of Hinata's youth. Naruto had not been tall and lanky, like Shikamaru, Neji and Shino had been. He hadn't been overly buffy, like Choji, Lee, and Kiba. Before the war, Naruto had been pretty and slightly feminine, in an odd, prepuberty way. By no means, Naruto was not powerful, because he was. Puberty had hit him later than the rest of the boys, which his childhood probably stunted. He was not the tall and gorgeously handsome man that he was now. Hinata had not noticed all of this until the proof was thrown in front of her.

And now, Hinata was rather chill about it this whole situation (she liked to think of herself as a rather understanding and laidback woman). The children, in her opinion, were flat-out adorable and had had such a positive effect on her own kids that there was absolutely no way she could hate them (not that Hinata hated anyone, but that was beside the point).

As for the parents, well…

She shipped it.

To clarify, Hinata shipped the Lady Seventh and her Jonin Commander. Her Naruto (her oblivious, loveable husband) was her Naruto, no one else's and she would be damned if anyone ruined all of her hard work. But at heart, Hinata was a romantic and she adored watching the Nara Uzumaki parents before all of the shit hit the fan.

Granted, Hinata could tell that they had been restraining themselves from being too lovey-dovey and flirty with each other, which was very considerate of them given their counterparts' _oh so manly_ egos. But she was Hinata Uzumaki, romantic, writer/editor of the Icha-Icha Reboot, and she could see romance from a mile away, even without her byakugan.

She saw how the Lady Hokage was always leaning against or touching her husband, as if his very presence brought her comfort. She saw how the Commander was always looking around with tense muscles, just to ensure that his wife was in sight encase he had to throw himself between her and an attack. And their flirtatious banter and those nicknames that were so familiar that it really should have bothered Hinata over the similarity of it all, god, her inner fangirl was totally squealing at the wit and love behind it all.

So, she shipped it. And she approved because out of all of the boys, Shikamaru was the only one that would have been good enough for her Naruto if he had batted the other way.

Which he didn't. Don't worry, they checked.

Now all Hinata had to do was keep Tsunade from killing her Naruto when he got back from the rescue mission. Afterall, a story about Girl Naruto and Shikamaru #2 would make up for some amazing crack fiction that she could totally make a killing on and she wanted to run the idea by him.

"I'm too old and sober to deal with this shit." Tsunade grumbled as she crouched down inspect Commander Nara.

"Does anyone else feel like we just dodged a bullet?" Kiba whispered under his breathe, only to wince when Ino elbowed him.

"Shh, she still has great hearing." Ino hissed before speaking up in a louder voice. "Naruto as a girl? Who would have thought?"

"We did." Choji, Kiba and Lee deadpanned.

"Huh?" Karui asked in confusion as Ino and Hinata looked at each other with an 'Oh…' expression on their faces. That's right, she had forgotten about that night.

 _Hinata had just became a Chunin and really couldn't come up with any other excuses to not go out and drink with her friends. She was legally an adult, her rank was already pretty high and her father even encouraged it (It will be a good opportunity for you to learn how easy you can gather information from drunk baboons). So, there she was with the remaining members of Konoha 11 in a smoky shinobi bar as Kiba and Ino went shot for shot._

" _She's going to be a pain to deal with in the morning." Shikamaru groaned besides her as she raised her small cup of sake to her lips in silent sympathy. Dealing with a drunk Ino was never fun._

" _He should stop. Why? Because his mother will make him sleep in the kennel again for smelling like a brewery."_

" _Piss off, Shino! I can still kick your ass." Kiba's comment would have been more intimidating, if he hadn't nearly fallen off of his stool during his slurred sentence. Hinata could almost see Shino's eyeroll behind his sunglasses, which yes, he still wore indoors and at 10:30 at night._

" _Yosh, I shall join in the youthful merriment-"_

" _No, Lee. Just no." Neji slide up into the open seat next to her, nodding to the rest of the group as greetings went around. "Lady Hinata." His words were soft and control. No longer did they hold the resentment that they once did. She gave him a soft smile._

" _Big Brother." She poured him a cup of sake and pushed it towards him, only to raise an eyebrow when he snapped it back. "Tough mission?"_

" _Children were among the casualties. One of them was Hanabi's age." Had it been three years earlier, Hinata would never had gotten such a raw confession from her cousin. But now, they were so much closer and open with each other that it was like he had always been her brother and had never tried to kill her in the first place._

 _Hinata said nothing, just topping off his glass again before clicking her glass against the side of his in understanding. She snipped slowly, allowing herself to get distracted back to the growing debate that had spurred._

" _I'm telling you, none of you know how tough it is to be a kunoichi!" Sakura stated as she leaned heavily on Choji for support to stay somewhat upright. Apprentice to the Lady Hokage she may be, Sakura was really a lightweight when it came to social drinking._

" _Here, here." Ten-Ten saluted as she maneuvered the sake away from Lee, who pouted._

" _But Ten-Ten-"_

" _No Lee."_

" _Yeah real tough." Ten-Ten's head snapped up to glare at Shikamaru, who continued. "Let's ignore the fact that 88% of the fatalities in last five years were from male shinobi, which is an increase of 25% from ten years ago."_

" _Details, details!" Ino slammed her palm down on the table, pointing her finger into her teammate's face. "One, I'm going to need more sake if you're going to be a smartass tonight-"_

" _I'm a smartass every night."_

" _And two," Ino steamrolled, ignoring Shikamaru's eyeroll. "you guys couldn't even pull off being a kunoichi even if you tried."_

 _This so wasn't the conversation that Hinata wanted to get into tonight and the idea of faking being wasted so that she could return to her bed was growing more and more appealing. Of the four kunoichis in their friend group, Ten-Ten and Sakura were only ones that you could really classify as feminists in the civilian prospective. And that was probably because they both came from civilian homes. Most likely, they grew up believing the civilian stereotypes of kunoichis as tools for sex and deception (which wasn't entirely wrong, admittedly). Either way, Hinata was too sober too listen to this argument again but the idea of getting more drunk wasn't all that enticing either._

" _Naruto could."_

 _It was like watching a scene from an anime, the way all of their heads turned around to look at Lee in unison. Ten-Ten's hand shot out, heaving his glass up to her nose and sniffing._

" _Nope, it's still water." She confirmed before asking, "What do you mean, Naruto could?"_

" _Ino said that none of us could be a kunoichi and I was simply noting that Naruto could be quite the youthful kunoichi if he wanted to be." Lee shrugged. The group fell silent and for a second, Hinata thought that the conversation would be dropped when-_

" _Yep, Lee's right." Choji, of all people, agreed. Hinata could feel her eyes grow wider in disbelief as the rest of the boys in their group started to nod in agreement._

" _Huh?!" Ten-Ten, Ino and Sakura shouted as Hinata just sat in silence as she watched the strange, sake-induced spectacle unfold._

" _You guys think that Naruto of all people, my teammate, the orange knucklehead Naruto, could be a kunoichi?!" Sakura's disbelief became more palpable as the boys nodded again. Even Neji… Neji, nodded._

" _He's short and you could snap him like a twig, he's so skinny." Kiba stated._

" _He's has a lot of rather, um, feminine facial features." Lee added. "Especially the whisker marks."_

" _He'd make a good kunoichi. Why? Because he can turn into one and still fool everyone." Shino finished, sipping his sake as if he hadn't just agreed with the bomb they had just planted._

" _But- but- but-" Sakura was now stuttering worse than Hinata used to when Shikamaru snorted at her expression. The lazy ninja leaned back against the booth, the gold in his eyes gleaming in the bar light._

" _You can't be that surprised. Naruto has a lot of softer features and if he was a girl, he'd probably be a pretty one. Hell, we've all seen his sexy jutsu and it does live up to its name. He'll grow out of it though, so you won't have to worry about him stealing your job any time soon, Sakura." Kiba, who was still totally wasted, mind you, sent a wicked grin at Shikamaru when he finished talking._

" _Oh? Lives up to its name, huh?" Shikamaru eyerolled._

" _Piss off, Kiba."_

" _But- but- but-" Sakura continued stuttering and Hinata sighed into her sake. Clearly, she was too sober if these were the conversations they were going to have._

 _Naruto, as a girl? What a crazy thought._

Hinata had forgotten about that night, tucking back into her memories of odd-sake-induced-conversations, which happened a lot more than you would think.

The boys were right afterall.

Temari walked back into her living room, her face taking on a perplexed look as she took in the group.

"What did I miss?" Her fellow immigrant shrugged.

"The leafies are having a moment." Karui drawled, causing Temari to laugh.

"Ino, get over here!" Tsunade's yell grabbed everyone's attention. Ino leaped over the coffee table to kneel at Tsunade's side as the rest of the group formed a semi-circle around the sofa. Tsunade's hands left a trial of green chakra as they moved up the Commander's chest to his head. They stayed there for a few tense seconds before returning back to his chest. Green chakra mixed with orange chakra as Tsunade barked,

"Check his mind." Hinata admits, she was confused as to how and why that was important. So was everyone else in the room. But Team 10 changed. Choji paled dramatically as Ino's hand grappled their way onto the Commander's head. Ino's body stilled as the room held its breath, the Yamanaka's jutsu taking over.

"What's wrong?" Temari pushed herself forward to get a better look at the comatose man who wasn't actually her husband but again, those were minor details. "What's wrong with him?" Tsunade grimaced, opening her to responded to Tsunade when Ino snapped out of the jutsu.

"How the fuck, Shikamaru…"

"Ino-" Choji started when Ino erupted.

"He was able to send his consciousness out of his body! First, he performs some highjacked version of the Eight Gates that damn near kills him and now he was able to send out his conscious to who knows where! Which means he was awake at some point, the dick! What the actual fuck!" Ino waved her hands in exasperation.

Hinata activated her byakugan only to flinch back at the sight of his chakra. It was – it was silver! The chakra near his heart was orange from the seal on his chest but as the chakra migrated through his body, it became the blinding silver river that flowed to his brain. Yet, there was something else.

"Ino, turn his head for me." Hinata ordered firmly, her eyes never leaving the man. Ino turned his head gently so that his face was towards the edge of the sofa while exposing the back of his neck. Hinata reached out move some of the pieces of hair that had fallen out of his ponytail away and –

"Is that a seal?" Karui asked as the group inspected the silver kanji of the verb, find (見附る), on the base of his neck. It was small and only the silver chakra that was lighting it up made it visible. Even though his hair was in the tradition Nara-style, the high-collar of his Chunin vest as well as the fur vest blocked it from view. As for the light emitting from it, if they hadn't turned his head, the sofa would have continued to smother the light.

Call it a hunch, but Hinata didn't think that was the only seal he was hiding. She scanned over his chakra system again. No, not there- There they are.

Hinata removed the blanket that laid against his torso and more importantly, his hands. She cupped his hands. The glow that they were shining under her byakugan. His fingerless gloves were the next to come off and –

"Shit, that's bright!" Kiba hissed as silver chakra leaked from more seals on the back of his hands. On one hand there was a spiral etched into his skin with the kanji for knives (刀) in the middle of the swirl. It's twin was stamped on his other hand.

"Wow." Choji whistled as he inspected the inside of gloves. "No wonder we couldn't see anything. These gloves are samurai-metal woven into what has to be top-quality Nara fur. I don't think you could cut through this with a normal kunai, let allow a chakra covered one."

"Man, so jealous." Kiba whined before smarting up. "What are those seals anyway? I thought 2.0 wasn't 'allowed' to use seals." Huh, 2.0? Not a bad nickname. But before Hinata could even ponder the secrets behind the seals, Lady Tsunade sighed,

"Well I'll be damned, I haven't seen these seals since I was a child." The group remained silent as the Lady Fifth recounted her memories with sad eyes. "My grandfather, when he wasn't being serious, was an idiot and would always lose shit and get lost. My grandmother and great-uncle were sick and tried of his whining so they created those seals," Tsunade lifted 2.0's hand for emphasize. "so that he could always find his way, either to his stuff or back home."

"The First Hokage, the literal God of Shinobi, was an idiot?" Temari asked in disbelief.

"He was the first certified idiot of Konoha, christened by my great-uncle, the Second." Tsunade noted with a serious nod before continuing with her story. "After a while, my great-uncle asked my grandmother if she could modify the seals so that if the Second found one of his chakra knives before the First even realized it was missing, the Second could send a message to say, 'stop leaving your shit everywhere, you dumbass.' When my grandfather learned that _he_ could send messages through those seals-"

"Let me guess, he got worse." Karui drawled.

"How unyouthful."

"Well, youthful or not, it turned out to be a stroke of genius when mail started to get intercept mail during the First Shinobi World War. With those seals on both the First's and Second's weapons, the two could communicate with each other, even if they were in difference villages." Tsunade finished before rubbing her thumb against one of the seals. Her eyes harden as she glared down at the Commander. "Whatever he's doing to communicate with whoever has his knives is draining the majority of the chakra he earned back. Hopefully he's not stupid enough to keep going but I'm going to go get him an IV. Ino, make sure he stays stable. Hinata, come with me."

The two women remained silent as they ran out of the Nara compound to Tsunade's office in the hospital. It was odd, how eerie and quite Konoha was since it had been put on high alert. Hinata looked up at the moon. Five minutes till midnight.

"Hinata, do you know how this Girl Naruto learned fuinjutsu?" Hinata nearly stumbled mid-leap at the pain that racked the older woman's voice. Without her byakugan, Hinata could only make out the kanji for gamble on the elder's back.

"Hinata?"

"Girl Naruto became a chunin." Hinata nearly stuttered. "After her first chunin exams with her Shikamaru. Lord Third had an order set that when she became a chunin, she would learn her family history." Lady Tsunade stopped moving and Hinata jumped down behind her. She watched as the last of the Senju's shoulders trembled.

"What else?" Her voice was hitching but the steel in the order still remained.

"We believe that our Lord Third also had this same order." Hinata gulped before steeling her nerves to ask the dreaded question. She needed to know for Naruto's sake. "Did he, Lady Tsunade?"

"Yes, Sensei did have that order in place." Lady Tsunade confessed. Three minutes. "Hinata, what I am about to tell you has haunted me since I was a jonin. I swore that I would be the one to tell Naruto and all that I ask is that you let me tell him."

One minute.

 **Author's Note - (Bombs exploding in the distance) Yeah, I left you guys with some nasty cliffhangers because I'm just that awesome. I'm extremely curious to read all of your comments about this chapter so start reviewing people. Let's bring this fic to 100 review, you amazing people! Let make a trade, reviews for Canon Naruto badassness in the next chapter. Sounds good? Great! Let me know what you guys think and guys, if you have plot ideas, message me, please. I take any and all of the help I can get. Well, that should be it. Please review, favorite and follow! Love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**

* * *

 **Meanwhile, in Konoha 2.0**

 _Retsu_

"Come on, Kaien. How many times do I have to say that I'm sorry?"

"Oh, I don't know, how many times did you flirt with our client, you ass?" Ugh, jealous gay men fighting. Such a pain in the ass. Great, now Retsu was starting to sound like Sensei. Well, it was bound to happen. Now, if only she could do that 'Boys, shut up' voice that Sensei used to do when Daisuke and Kaien fought and couldn't figure out if they wanted to kill or fuck each other. Puberty had been a _wonderful_ time for Team 4. Why did she let them get together again?

Right, she was a closet yaoi fangirl.

"He was flirting with me!"

"You even admit it! No, don't talk me!"

"Kaien-"

"Retsu, please tell Daisuke that he's a dick and that I'm not talking to him."

"Retsu, tell Kaien that-" Fuck this shit. Sensei would know what to do. Out of all of her Sensei's genin students (all three of them), Retsu was 95.6% certain that she was Sensei's favorite and that Sensei would forgive her for kicking in his door again. Sensei would make Kaien and Daisuke fix it anyway when he saw the shitstorm that she's been dealing with since Kumo.

 _Since Kumo._

"Sensei!" The door slammed open. "Kaien and Daisuke are having a pissing contest again and I'm done with their shit!"

Blink, blink.

"Awh, fuck." Vice-Commander Inuzuka facepalmmed. "Shikamaru's other brats have returned."

* * *

 **Author's Note - I wished I learned about how to do these omakes sooner. They're hilarious to write. P.S. Reread chapter three if the omake is confusing you. Hope that helps!**

 **-V. I. Winthrop**


	19. Shikamaru Messes with Sealing

**Author's Note- Hey guys, I'm sorry I've been kind of MIA but life called and said that I needed to come back for a visit. Ok, well jokes aside, I need to put this on the back-burner for a bit while I got settled for a new chapter in my life (ha, author humor). Also, my writer's block really sucked writing this chapter. In all honestly, I'm not the happiest with my Canon Naruto POV in this chapter. I wanted to give you guys more but my plan for the final chapter (or two, still working out the details) requires a different POV and I didn't want three POVs in this chapter. Not to mention, I definitely not the best at writing Canon Naruto. However, I'm extremely Canon Shikamaru POV. Well, that should be it for this note! I hope you guys like the chapter and guys, we are one follower away from 200 followers and one favorite away for 150 favorites! I love you guys so much! On to the story!**

Chapter 19: Shikamaru Messes with Sealing

 _Advisor Nara_

Slash, lunge, stab, pivot, jump, backbend, roll, sprint, attack, repeat.

 _Man_ , Shikamaru thought as he dodged another demon root, _I'm out of shape._ The sound of a dying clone had him jumping to the right as another clone took a blow that was meant for him. He used his shadow to threw a kunai at the root during his retreat.

Boom!

Exploding Shadow Tag, such a great invention if he did say so himself. Too bad Shikamaru was running out of kunai with exploding tags. What a drag…

He landed in a crouch in front of Girl Naruto's wooden prison. The poor Naruto clones decided to use themselves as Shikamaru's and Girl Naruto's human(ish) shields against Zetsu's roots and were paying the price for it. The 350 clones that Shikamaru started with were down to a miniscule 75 and another tsunami of roots was headed their way.

Wonderful.

He glanced back Girl Naruto and winced at the fact that the woman was still caged. He really should have gotten her out by now but-

Shikamaru sent another flurry of exploding kunai to his left to stop the group of puppet shinobi from attempting to steal the cage away. As you can see, he was a little busy right now.

He snuck another glance at Naruto's counterpart. The Lady Seventh reminded Shikamaru of that one time he saw Naruto nearly lost control when they were younger. The feral look that graced the woman's face was as beautiful as it was terrifying. Her whisker marks were more pronounced, her grimace revealing her sharp fangs. Her talons clawed and pulled against her chains.

His brain started to wander, comparing what little he remembered about his Naruto's (shut up, Kiba) relationship with Kurama and the woman's. She looked so similar yet; he spared a look at his Hokage. Naruto poured out a liquid gold trial as he chased after the alien reject. Kurama Mode made Naruto look more like a sun warrior than an animal.

So similar, yet so different.

Sure, when Naruto was younger and lacked control, the Kyuubi's more animalistic features seemed to merge with the boy. It had made enemies flinch at the stronger, deadlier, almost predator-like Naruto. The orange chakra that had bubbled around him only added to his dominating appearance. Kurama made Naruto look like the alpha amongst his peers by appearance and just that alone made people hesitant to fight the orange shinobi in that state.

This feeling only intensified after the war but still-

"Move!" The lower pitch yet almost sensual warning that escaped Girl Naruto, or Uzumaki which sounds more respectful to Shikamaru, brought him out of his thoughts. He leapt backwards as another wooden cage grew where he once stood. His back nearly grazed her cage. Not wanting to waste time, Shikamaru swung to impale the structure only for the blade to deflect away as if the wood was made of metal instead.

"Dammit." He cursed. "What the-"

"Are those my husband's?" Uzumaki asked suddenly. He was taken aback by her shift in personality. Kurama's animalistic changes seemed to have evaporated and she had gained back her, not bubbliness, but brashness that she shared with her counterpart.

"Um, yes?" Shikamaru will confess, he was reluctant to answer her question. The tone that she had used reminded him far too much of the one that Temari or his mother used whenever they debated whether he was in deep shit or not and wanted to use his answer to decide his fate.

Troublesome…

"How did you- Shikamaru, the clones!" Her yell had him facing back towards their clone barrier and he cursed. The earth bubbled and cracked as trees sprouted in a tidal wave towards them. A quick count of the clones and he was moving. They couldn't afford to lose anymore.

His brain seemed to project the plan in midair as Shikamaru leaped in front of the clones. Stabbing his counterpart's left trench knife into the earth in front of him, the ground caved as Fissure buried the roots and baby redwoods. Not taking any chances, he raised his free hand into the tiger symbol.

"Fire Style: Burning Ash." He exhaled the ashy smoke onto the roots as they tried to unearth themselves. He waited to the last possible moment, just as the roots were just about to free themselves then he clipped his teeth together, cutting off the smoky ash-

Click.

BOOM!

Thanks for that jutsu, Asuma-Sensei.

"What are you guys doing?" Shikamaru knew better than to bark at the clones but his nerves were growing more shot as the seconds passed. Midnight was approaching. "Never mind, I want at least 20 clones to-"

 _ **Man, it's a good thing you aren't the Jonin Commander here. If I gave out orders like that, Naruto would let Kiba kill me.**_

Shikamaru froze, his eyes scanning the area. Where the hell-

 _ **My knives don't just have pretty engravings, Nara. Naruto wanted a way for us to communicate for situations like these.**_

"How-"

 _ **Think it, don't speak it out loud. You're defeating the whole purpose of the seals.**_ Fine, if his counterpart was going to be sassy, Shikamaru was going to be sassy right back.

 _I thought you weren't allowed to 'use' seals._

 _ **Oh, ha ha, very funny, smartass.**_ Take's one to know one. _**These are Level 1 seals that don't blow up at the touch of my chakra. Or our chakra, it seems.**_ Blow up? While those words made Shikamaru suspicious, he decided to tuck that nugget of information away for later.

 _Aren't you supposed to be comatose and getting one hell of a bad back?_ Why Shikamaru hadn't replaced that horrible piece of furniture, he'll never know.

Oh right, he was too lazy to change it.

Another wave of trees lunged at him. Shikamaru thrusted the knives into the soil at his feet.

"Earth Style: Great Moving Earth Core!" Shikamaru was gasping for breath as the draining jutsu sucked at his chakra as the earth pushed back the trees like wave. Fuck, he was running out of chakra. But at least now he had created another barrier against Zetsu's unending roots.

"Shikamaru!" He ignored his Not Wife's worried cry. They couldn't afford him turning his back on the roots.

"Clones, scatter and uproot as many trees as possible!" Shikamaru's order had Naruto's clones dispersing into the growing forest in the desert.

The moon inched towards midnight as it's light reflected against Kaguya's prison.

They were running out of time.

 _ **Trust me, my back will hurt like a bitch in the morning.**_ Shikamaru could almost picture his counterpart's headshake before Nara continued. _**Look, I'm running out of time-**_

 _You're running out of time?_

 _ **And chakra and so are you.**_ Nara steamrolled. _**Focus, you aren't awakened so you'll have to listen to me-**_

 _What does that have to do with anything?_

Shikamaru was really getting tired of all of this awakened Nara bullshit. He hated it.

It was troublesome.

It made his son and new daughter targets.

It painfully pointed out Shikamaru's ignorance of his clan's history.

He had heard the whole 'Clan Head and Heir are Fertile with Yin' speech before, many, many years ago on his grandmother's lap. His grandmother, while a Sarutobi that married into the Nara clan, knew his clan's life story better than anyone and weaseled it into nearly every encounter that they had.

 _It is my duty._ Gran used to say when he would complain about how troublesome learning about his clan was. _It is my duty as the Dowager Lady to ensure that we never forget the power that we wield and that Konoha never realizes it truest extent. The less they know, the better, Shikamaru._

He had scoffed back then and promptly forgot it all until this week. Yeah, the Nara clan was strong, well respected and easily the smartest clan in Konoha but they weren't that special. They weren't the Senju, the founders. They weren't the Uchiha, the police. They weren't the Hyuga, the eyes. Hell, they weren't even the Inuzuka, Aburame, Akimichi, Yamanaka, and the list goes on and on of the important clans of Konoha.

The Naras were a clan of past nomads, deer tenders, inventors, strategists.

They were Konoha's clan of lazy geniuses.

They weren't that powerful.

They weren't that special.

Or at least, that was the lie that Shikamaru used to tell himself in his youth. As he aged, Shikamaru noticed the vast reach that his clan held in the village and that no one stopped or questioned. There was at least one Nara in every department of the hospital, all a vital asset, most of them ran their specialties' division. 95% of the Nara shinobi were either high-combat field shinobi or paper ninja with A to S-rank classification. Hell, Shikamaru's own lazy-ass father, Shikaku, was revered as the strongest Jonin Commander since the Second Hokage held said position.

And who was Shikamaru but the right hand of Konoha's greatest Hokage and his most loyal support and advisor. Shikamaru who, should Naruto (and Sasuke, he supposed) for some horrifying reason wasn't Hokage anymore, the hat would fall to next in the line of succession. Even before Kakashi and Tsunade, because Naruto had insisted on it in the will that he had written after he took office.

And the very thought of that situation kept Shikamaru awake at night.

 _You are destined for greatness, Shikamaru, even if others don't see it. Even if my dear cousin didn't see it._ His grandmother's dying words after the invasion during his Chunin Exams rang clear. _Even if you don't see it._

 _ **Gran always did have a way of making you feel both good and like an idiot with her riddles.**_ Nara grumbled as Shikamaru rolled his eyes, even though his counterpart couldn't see it. It was the principle of the matter, afterall.

 _Go away, you're distracting._ Shikamaru ordered before releasing another valley of exploding kunai at the infestation before him. Past him, he could make out Naruto's orange form as Zetsu's chakra-filled kick sent the Kage flying. _In case you haven't noticed, I'm a little busy protecting your_ _wife._

 _ **Which I'm very grateful for!**_ Nara admitted in a rush. Like something was wrong with him. _**Look, like I was saying earlier, you aren't awakened but you need to use your chakra to get Naruto out of that cage.**_

 _My chakra?_ Shikamaru really couldn't help questioning his counterpart's word choice now. What made his, their, chakra so special? Sure, his son's shadow was able to transport them into this old warzone. Sure, their chakra was heavily yin-based. Sure, their chakra was able to negate movement. Sure-

His brain came to a screeching halt as the dots started to connect. He saw Tayuya, the Sound Kunoichi who struggled to move against his shadow and neck bind. He saw Hidan, the immortal murdering bastard who resisted against his shadow stitching. He saw his own world that Infinite Tsukuyomi had create, which destroyed his sense of reality within its shadow world. He saw the fake world start to fade away as his chakra gnawed at its edges. He saw Shikamira's Black Spider Lily, immobilizing those puppet shinobi like nothing. He saw Nara prying the barrier open, forcing it apart through sheer will power and chakra alone.

 _Pure yin chakra_.

Yin chakra, that's used to create genjutsus, which negates the victims' senses.

Yin chakra, that stops movement.

Yin chakra, the shadow style.

Yin chakra, the nullifier.

 _ **Good.**_ Nara's breathe was labored now. _**I have to go. I'm out of chakra. Hurry!**_

 _What? Wait, Nara-_

"Shikamaru!" Uzumaki's cry forced him back into the battle as root raced to stab him on his open right side. He didn't have time to dodge and braced himself for the impact when-

WOOSH! Crackle, crackle.

"Boruto?" Shikamaru couldn't believe his eyes at the sight of Boruto, his eye activated, holding a blade that crackled with lightning.

"Hey Uncle Shikamaru, Mira gave me a new toy." Boruto twirled the katana, stabbing the root that tried to sneak up on him. "Isn't it cool?"

"Is that safe?" Shikamaru pondered under his breathe only for his son, who dropped down into a crouch on his left side, to snort.

"Probably not. But Mira thought it was a good idea. I'm here to make sure that the idiot doesn't stab himself."

"Hey!"

"Anyway," Shikadai drawled before turning to face Uzumaki. "I'm sure Auntie would appreciate it if we got her out of here before midnight."

"Gee, you think?" Uzumaki grumbled before her cobalt eyes locked onto him. Shikamaru paused under her gaze. She was waiting for him, like she knew what his revelation was. God, it was kind of weird how in tune Uzumaki was with him, her husband's counterpart.

"Don't worry, Dad. We'll cover you."

"Hey, Dai! Three earthworms, seven o'clock!"

"Wait, boys!" Shikamaru's cry fell to deaf ears as the two genin threw themselves into the fray against the roots. Part of him, the overprotective parent, wanted to catch them with his shadow and pull them back to safety. The other part of him…

"Awh hell yah!" Boruto sliced his way through the forest. "Take that, you overgrown weeds!"

"Wind Style: Wind Scythe Jutsu!"

"Dude, that's so unfair! You've got to help me with that move! I suck at it!"

"Seriously, Ruto? This is what you want to talk about midbattle?"

"Yeah?"

"You're unbelievable. Troublesome blonde."

"Hey, I take offence to that-" The other part of him was extremely proud them and knew that the boys would be just fine.

"What do I need to do?" He addressed Uzumaki, who nodded her head towards the bars of her cage. She opened her mouth to speak before hesitating. There was worry in her eyes again.

"How much chakra do you have left?" She was worried for him.

Troublesome woman.

"Enough."

"That's not a good answer, Shikamaru!" Her voice cracked slightly in fear, in fear of him getting more hurt. "The last time you forced your chakra through a barrier, it nearly killed you."

You, huh?

"Well, it's a good thing then, that I'm not your husband."

Shikamaru winced at the kicked puppy look that shrouded her face at his harsh and blunt word. What was he doing, upsetting a woman who was afraid to lose everything, even a cheap copy of the man that she loved?

But what else was he supposed to do? Let her get sacrificed to Kaguya so that he wouldn't get hurt?

 _Nara, Uzumaki, I'm entrusting my family with you two._

Yeah, that wasn't happening. The Nara Uzumakis were going to returned safely to their world, even if it killed him.

If there was one thing that Shikamaru learned through all of this, was that family really was everything and that his family was amazing. Sure, they weren't perfect, obviously, but they were his family. Temari, Shikadai and Mom were his whole life, his reasons to getting up in the morning. Yeah, he had been jealous of Nara for having the daughter that he always wanted. Yeah, he had been jealous of how easy Nara's relationship with his wife appeared. But Uzumaki wasn't Temari and a world without Temari at his side was as weird as it was scary. No, he wouldn't change it for the world.

Besides, Shikamaru was 99% certain that Temari would figure out a way to resurrect him so that she could kill him herself. What beautiful, strong, sexy, troublesome, violent wife he had.

Still, he did feel guilty for the hurt look on Uzumaki's face. Then the woman chuckled, a soft smile relaxing her features.

"It is a good thing, because I'd have _so_ kicked your ass in the morning for doing something impulsive and stupid. That's my job." He smirked at her. Leave it to Naruto's girl self to crack a joke at the worst moments.

"Well, we can't have that, now can we? Alright, what do I need to do?"

Uzumaki nodded her head up. His eyesight followed. At the top of her wooden bird cage looked like a birdbath that all of the bars met at. A thin light emanated from it. Or more specifically, emanated from the kanji etched around the rim of the bath.

"Unfortunately, it's not just fake Senju wood you have to deal, you'll have to break the seals that the backstabbing Bitch put on this thing while the kids were in the slug. You've got two options." Her gaze became that of a professional, a genius at their trade. "You could either go up there and try to reverse the seal. Every seal has like an emergency stop button written into it. Pumping chakra into that will stop the seal from working and make this just a pile of wood. It requires either knowing where it is or solving the labyrinth of mini-seals in order to find it. Or you could try overloading the yang chakra in the seals with your yin chakra."

"And hope it doesn't kill me."

"Basically."

"What a drag…" His groaning slouch got a giggle out of Uzumaki. He wanted to smile back at her when-

"Rasen Shuriken!"

CRASH! BOOM!

The forest behind them was plowed down as Naruto's chakra swiped the perimeter. Zetsu was forced out into the open when another blonde comet rush at his side.

"Third Gate: Gate of Life! Open! Crashing Tsunami!" Takashi's powerful double kick launched Zetsu straight into the grasp of Naruto's chakra tail/hand/thing. Black tendrils zoomed at the alien from Shikamira's crouch at Naruto's side. The shadow stitching blended with Zetsu's skin as it stabbed its way over his form. Zetsu roared in pain before the ground at his feet cracked open. Another tree appeared in front of him, effectively cutting him free.

"After the slippery bastard, kiddos!" Well, at least Naruto was enjoying himself and bonding with the kids if the wicked grin on his face was anything to go by.

"Aye, aye, Guy Mom. Taka, get your lazy-ass back into gear!"

"My lazy-ass? You're the one that can't keep up."

"Guy Mom, Taka just implied that I'm fat!"

"I did not! Guy Mom-"

"Kids, slippery bastard that can make a forest?"

"Fine." The twins groaned before focusing back on their task at hand.

"He handled that well." Uzumaki laughed before smirking at Shikamaru with a wicked gleam. "You two can babysit for us whenever you want. It's been ages since Shikamaru and I've had some alone time."

"Didn't need to know that." Shikamaru grumbled as he leapt up to the bath to escape her teasing.

As he peered into the birdbath, the dry basin shook as chakra lines started to appear before him. It reminded of when Benihime first released them from that barrier when this all started. The kanji for the elements were intertwined with the kanji for heaven. He reached forward to brush his fingers against the kanji-

"Hiss!" Shikamaru ripped his hand back as if he had just touched a hot stovetop. His fingertips burned from the inside, as if there was a mini explosion in his bloodstream (which is a wonderful thought to have, he sarcastically thought). The blue light that the kanji was releasing shift to blood red for three pauses before turning back to blue.

"You okay?" Uzumaki called up over the crash that Boruto and Shikadai were creating as they protected them from the multiplying puppet shinobi.

"Is it supposed to burn on contact?" He asked sarcastically when he heard a sheepish,

"No, but that started happening to Shikamaru after he became awakened so, yeah, I guess you're also more awakened than we thought." Of course he was…

"And let me guess, Shikamira doesn't have this problem because she's half Uzumaki?"

"Bingo."

"Wonderful." Shikamaru glared back at the kanji before his hands moved into their thinking position.

Five more minutes: that's how much time they had left before midnight. Psycho Haruno: effectively distracted and being handled by the Uchihas. Zetsu: Naruto and the twins had him on the ropes. All that was left: freeing Uzumaki and putting the gate back under.

Kanji; fire, earth, water, air. Connected to heaven. Intertwined with heaven. Linked to heaven.

Yin. Yang. Reaction to the two chakras touching: negative. A burning session that sparked through his quickly depleting chakra supply.

Burning, Yin, sparks, chakra, heaven.

 _ **Boy… It's not…**_

 _ **You are… Fe… Yin…**_

 _ **Listen to me… Shikamaru…**_

 _ **You are stronger… Damn stealing bas…**_

 _ **FIGHT IT!**_

Shika Nara. Awakened. Stealing… bas-bastards. Red. Yin, genjutsu, shadows-

That's it.

"Shikamaru!" He ignored Uzumaki's worried cry. He roared through the pain; his left arm engulfed in phantom flames as he forced his chakra into the flame kanji.

In the end, fire was the only kanji the safeguard could have been.

Confused? Well, the confession is that it was his ancestor's yells in his memory that brought out the answer. Obviously, the stealing bastards referred to the Sharingan welders, aka, the Uchiha. And no, Shika Nara didn't mean that the Nara clan had some claim to the Sharingan. No, she was referring to the Nara clan's claim to all things yin-related. Genjutsu, shadows, all jutsu that required yin in some variation was under their jurisdiction.

Or at least, that's what Gran used to tell him and Shikaku never contradicted her claim.

As for the fire kanji, most Uchiha were fire-types, hence the fan on their backs.

Get it, fanning the flame?

…Right, well, dad jokes asides, when you think of fire, your first thought would be the beautiful light that emits from it. What most people forget about is the shadows that the light creates behind it. Fire is a balancing act, really. In small amounts, it is life, warmth, a beacon of hope. In large amounts, it is death, burning, uncontrollable and unforgiving. It is both yin and yang and heaven wouldn't exist without it.

Granted, heaven wouldn't exist without all of the other elements too but that was beside the point.

But hey, his thought process worked because as his chakra raced through the seal, the birdbath shook. Its rimmed etching become bloody before blackening. Behind Shikamaru's hand was dust as the structure of the bath charred and turned to ash. The valley's cold wind blew it away.

Shikamaru looked down and winced at the burns on his left hand. His forethought to sacrifice his nondominate hand may save them in the future. The chakra burns had destroyed his black gloves, leaving his palm red and starting to blister. A quick roll up of his left sleeve relieved more burns on his forearm that really stung like a bitch. Still-

Crunch, rip!

"Finally, I was beginning to lose the feeling in my arms." Uzumaki gripped the two bars before her and tugged. They splintered under her strength as the Lady Hokage step out under the moonlight. "Great job, Nara! Come on, we've got some ass to kick!"

Two minutes.

He jumped down to her side.

 _You are destined for greatness, Shikamaru, even if others don't see it…_ _Even if you don't see it._ Gran's words repeated once more as they raced to action.

He wasn't destined for greatness, Shikamaru insisted, but-

"Dang, you're way less burned than my Shika was when he first did that!" (Ha, take that, Nara.)

He was okay with that.

 _The Lord Hokage_

It's raining men, Hallelujah, it's raining men.

Actually, it was raining clones but that really didn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

"What is this?" Snarled Zetsu as Naruto lead his army of clones at the alien. He weaved his way through what he had to admit was a half-decent replica of the Forest of Death.

Gee, doesn't that bring back great memories? (Ah, the beauty of sarcasm)

"Hiss!" The Lord Hokage growled as the root sliced his left cheek. Pop, pop, pop. There goes his left flank of clones.

 _ **Would you look at that, they're just as useless as you were after the academy.**_ Feeling the love, Kurama. And was that comment really necessary?

 _ **Yes.**_

Well then.

The valley, now forest, was silent as the wind blew a tumble weed between the foes. The bastardized form of Obito staring down the Kyuubi's container.

 _ **The Kyuubi? Really? After all we went through?**_ So not the time for sarcastic sass, Kurama.

"You know, I thought you'd be happy, being stuck with your mother for all of eternity." Naruto baited for a reaction.

"You try being sandwiched between rocks and a planet and tell me how that feels." Snarky and pissed off. Good. "I've waited for decades to have this chance again." The earth below Naruto's feet shook before he leapt back to avoid another, freaking wooden cage. Zetsu continued ranting.

"My mother, my beautiful mother-"

 _You and I have two very different definitions of beautiful._

 _ **Amen to that.**_

"Was trapped for generations only to be defeated by ants like you."

"Did you just steal Sasori's line? Because I'm pretty sure that's copywrited." Naruto quipped before crossing his fingers. Just in a nick of time, his wall of clones took the blow from the root/javelin attack before Naruto got skewered.

"I'm going to enjoy killing you." Zetsu sneered. "Especially since I don't even need your Kyuubi. The Lady Hokage is a far easier source, anyway."

 _ **We've been insulted. Kill him.**_

 _For once, I'm cool with your kill first, ask questions later, thought process._

The next instant saw Zetsu surrounded by Naruto's clones. Zetsu turned, throwing his arm out as he sprinted towards the north. Naruto winced as a mountain of roots ripped apart the clones.

"Hey!" Clone 695 ( _ **Seriously, you're numbering your clones now? Lame**_ **.** _Again, not the time, Kurama!_ ) called out as Zetsu escaped up the new structure. Naruto huffed before leading the charge after the alien. For a guy buried under dirt for so long, he could definitely still move.

Let's change things up, shall we?

The roar of chakra through his core left a trail of golden-orange as Kurama's chakra cloak encased his body. Around him, his clones gained the same advantage. The Seventh fell back, allowing himself to get mixed up in the fray. He focused his line of sight towards the distance and hid. The clones valleyed attack after attack at Zetsu. Naruto waited in silence, waiting for an opening.

Shocking, I know.

And still he waited for that opening. No, not yet, almost-

Now!

"Gah!" Zetsu didn't even see him coming, which was defiantly a feat on Naruto's part because subtle wasn't in his vocabulary. But man, Uzumaki wasn't kidding when she said that punching shit was good for the soul. The forest ripped apart like weeds as Zetsu flow through it, Naruto's chakra-infused Wind Punch (one of his personal creations, thank you very much) ensuring his painful journey.

Naruto advanced after him only to be stopped by a personal hatred of his.

…

An army of puppet shinobi.

Creepy little shits.

"You'll pay for that! Kill him, kill them all." Zetsu ordered as the puppets tensed before launching themselves forward.

"Keep them busy!" Naruto barked to his clones before leaping up and over the two armies. His face must have looked really pissed off because Zetsu flinched as Naruto started marching.

"Stay back!" Naruto ripped through the wall of wood that tried to block him in his path. "I will not be defeated again!" Naruto was deaf to the shouts, his steps unwavering when-

Snap.

"What…" He couldn't speak and it was a struggle to move. It was like Naruto had quick-dry cement all over his body. Gritting his teeth so hard they almost broke, he was able to glance down at his feet.

A seal, the kanji reading 'stop' (停留), rested below his feet.

He was trapped.

 _ **You've really lost your touch since becoming Hokage.**_ Shut up, Kurama.

Unfortunately, Kurama wasn't wrong. Naruto had lost his touch since becoming Hokage. A lot. But the thing was, he let it happen.

In truth, he blames his naivety for his now dulled scenes. After he had gained the hat, hell, even before the hat, the Shinobi World had lost its bloody edge.

Well, perhaps lost wasn't the correct word. Lessened? Glided?

Whatever it was, the Shinobi World was, for a lack of a better word, safer now. Most missions were escort missions now and the number of KIAs have steadily dropped every year since the last war. In short, shinobis didn't have the need to train as much and had done the worst possible thing that they could have done.

They became complacent and lost their innate, shinobi paranoia.

Kakashi had warned him when he took the hat that Boruto's group at the academy needed a firm kick in the ass to prepare them for life outside of Konoha's walls. The masked man had warned him that with the way things were, should they be called to war, they wouldn't be able to handle it.

The truth is that the moment Naruto stepped into that office as Hokage and sat down with Shikamaru to read the SSS-Class files, that only the Hokage and his Advisor were allowed to read, Naruto made it his mission to change the Shinobi World so that his children didn't have to fight in it.

So, he pushed himself away from his family, threw himself into his work, and played the game of politics better than anyone thought possible to make the world a better place.

The irony of it all was that not only did his actions cause a rift in his family, his lack of copious training of his teenage years due to being stuck in the office so damn much had made it so that he was now weaker, unable to protect his family and unable to teach his children in case _they_ were attacked without _him_ there to protect _them_.

Naruto had become complacent and had lost his paranoia.

Some Hokage he was.

Some shinobi he was.

Some father he was.

"You know, falling into that other world landed me a goldmine of a vengeful fuinjutsu mistress!" Zetsu laughed as Naruto tried to struggle against the seal. "It's all over, Lord Hokage! Mother will rise again and all you can do is watch as your children become her first victims!"

His children…

His eyes scanned the valley the best that they could before landing on the moon.

Five minutes left.

He saw a younger Boruto sparring in preparation for the academy entrance exam with a blinding smile on his face. He had been so happy that day when the results came in.

He saw his beautiful (just like her gorgeous mother) Himawari's acts of kindness, her willingness to share her time and energy with anyone and everyone.

He saw Benihime happily chattering from Takashi's back, the brother playing ignorant when really, he was listening intently to every word she said.

He saw Shikamira playing shogi with Shikadai at Ino's house, Motoko curled up on her lap as the Nara heiress did everything in her power to ease the loneness of the Nara heir.

His will of fire burned.

No. One. Threatens. His. Children.

"I, won't let, that, happen!" Naruto pushed out as his glare on the alien harden.

"Oh? You think you can stop me?" Zetsu smirked. "And how do you suppose you're going to stop the seal?"

 _ **And that is my que.**_

 _Kurama, what are you-_

A tidal wave of memories flooded Naruto's brain. Memories that weren't his own.

" _I'm an Uzumaki, Tobirama, I am the last person you should be questioning when it comes to sealing. Now do me a favor and kindly leave me to my work."_

" _Kushina, child, before you take this burden from me, you have much to learn."_

Mito Uzumaki.

" _Minato, you idiot! That's not what that seal is for! Serves you right, having it explode in your face!"_

" _My chains can subdue anyone and anything. Remember that the next time you go peeping, Jiraiya."_

Kushina Uzumaki.

Mom.

There were memories of ink spelling, endless hours of writing kanji over and over and over again. There were memories of blood spilling on the battle field, of reading ancient Uzumaki scrolls on fuinjutsu foundation and history. There were memories of every seal those women knew and how to prepare and execute them perfectly.

There was a memory on how to stop any seal, even the one at his feet. There were so many questions that he wanted to ask, but the most important one came out in the hoopla.

 _I could have known fuinjutsu this entire time?!_

 _ **I like to see you suffer.**_ The demon fox smirked.

To hell with you, Kurama.

After the battle, Naruto would admit that it felt like he had just cheated his way to becoming a fuinjutsu master. And while he was a shinobi, this type of cheating just didn't feel right, to him, at least. He vowed to sit down and painfully relearn everything by hand while teaching it to Boruto and Himawari. But right now, he frankly didn't give two shits.

Besides, he was a shinobi. He was supposed to use cheating to his advantage.

… Damn, he did owe Boruto an apology afterall.

"Rah!"

While in his youth, Naruto's chakra control was, frankly, shit. And while it was still pretty crappy according to Kakashi, it was far better than it used to be. One deep breath focused him, allowing the Hokage to locate his chakra system. The action allowed him to expel chakra down his core, through his spine, down his leg and to the sole of his feet. The earth moved as if he had pick up a stick and started drawing in it. The kanji for go, (行く), drew itself over the other kanji. Naruto rushed forward, the attack already forming in his hand.

"Giant Rasengan!" Zetsu didn't even have time to dodge and could only minimize the damage through rushing behind some trees. Which didn't stand a chance against the jutsu. Where Zetsu once stood was a valley carved into a whirlpool of uprooted trees and no alien.

"Well damn…"

"I thought you said he didn't know any fuinjutsu." Naruto pivoted as Shikamira shadow traveled to his left side. In her right hand was her katana with the kanji for fire (火) etched into its metal. A thud sounded on his right. Takashi landed next to him in a crouch next to him, his chain raveling themselves up his forearm. Disbelief crossed the faces of the twins.

"Yeah, about that…" Naruto did his bashful head scratch under their scrutinizing eyes (something they totally got from Shikamaru). "Kurama was able to give me Mom and Granny Mito's fuinjutsu memories." The twins dropped their jaws.

"Like all of them?" Takashi nearly stuttered.

"Yeah."

They stared at him in blue-eyed wonder. The seconds were almost unbearable. He could feel the sweat dripping down his neck as he opened his mouth to speak when Shikamira started to laugh uncontrollably. The father (mother/ish, whatever) and son shared a baffled look before focusing on the laughing and gasping girl.

"She's lost it. She's finally gone bonkers. Guy Mom, you broke her."

"Shut up." Shikamira sobered just enough to glare at her twin before giggling, "Only Mom could do something as impossible as learn fuinjutsu in three months and you were able to do it in three minutes. Guy Mom, you've official tripled the Uzumaki's score our Nara v. Uzumaki scoreboard! A new record!"

"I did what now?"

"Inside joke. Just go with it." Takashi patted his arm in sympathy. "What you have before you is a girl suffering from Mom's Uzumaki craziness, Dad's Nara sass, and too many life and death situations in one day. She'll be fine in the morning."

"I can still hear you, you know?" Shikamira grumbled before signing in a fury. "Shadow Imitation Protection Jutsu!"

Shikamira's shadow made a dome around them, protecting them from being speared by Zetsu's counterattack of evil roots. Through the blackened shield, Naruto could make out Zetsu's retreat towards his counterpart's cage.

"Guy Mom, we need you help!" Shikamira dropped the shield as the three of them gave chase. "And we're going to need all of the Uzumaki luck that you've got!" Uzumaki luck?

"We need to catch him to close the gate!" Takashi continued as he kicked away a falling tree. "We've figured out that if we can seal him into the gate, the gate should rebalance and keep Kaguya caged."

So many questions rushed through him and if he hadn't gained the knowledge that he just got, he would be totally lost.

 _ **Still waiting for that 'thank you, Kurama, for saying my ass once again.'**_ So not the time, Kurama. But their logic was sound. Besides, he trusted his kids to know what they were doing.

"Alright, Shikamira, stand by for capturing and defense. Takashi and I will take point." The pair saluted him before he body-flickered himself in front of Zetsu's path. The alien flinched and tucked himself through his jungle in retreat. For a normal ninja, it would have been hard to chase after him given the sharp turns and hanging branches.

"Rasen Shuriken!" Good thing Naruto wasn't a normal shinobi.

CRASH! BOOM!

The forest before them was plowed down as Naruto's chakra swiped the perimeter. Zetsu was forced out into the open when another blonde comet rush at his side.

"Third Gate: Gate of Life! Open! Crashing Tsunami!" Takashi's powerful double kick launched Zetsu straight into the grasp of Naruto's chakra tail/hand/thing. Shikamira signed the rat sign as black tendrils zoomed at the alien from Shikamira's crouch at Naruto's side. The shadow stitching blended with Zetsu's skin as it stabbed its way over his form. Zetsu roared in pain before the ground at his feet cracked open. Another tree appeared in front of him, effectively cutting him free.

"After the slippery bastard, kiddos!" While it was annoying how long this game of cat and mouse was going on, Naruto was enjoying himself while bonding with the kids. See Hinata, he could multitask.

"Aye, aye, Guy Mom. Taka, get your lazy-ass back into gear!"

"My lazy-ass? You're the one that can't keep up."

"Guy Mom, Taka just implied that I'm fat!"

"I did not! Guy Mom-" Naruto sweatdropped at the squabbling, which remind him so much of the twins' counterparts that it was fucking hilarious now.

 _ **Only you would be so calm and okay with this multi-dimension shitstorm.**_

 _Was that a compliment? Because I'm taking it as one._

"Kids, slippery bastard that can make a forest?"

"Fine." The twins groaned before focusing back on their task at hand. The twins flanked him as the group searched the valley.

"Where is he?" Muttered the blonde Nara. His twin shrugged.

"He's probably hiding in the trees again."

"Well kids, we have two minutes till doomsday 2.0. Good thing my best plans happen under pressure. This is what we need to do."

 _ **If this plan works, I'm going to eat my left shoe.**_

 _You don't even wear shoes!_

 _ **Details, details.**_

Unlike Mr. Sassy McSassypants-

 _ **I resent that.**_

Naruto had full faith in his plan, especially since it was hairbrained. Hopefully, his girl self won't kill him for his idea. Eh, he should be fine.

Maybe.

 **Author's Note - The amount of foreshadowing in this chapter is ridiculous. I'll spoil this for you guys, the sequel to this novel can be described in three words, lazy Nara revolution (ish). If you didn't get while reading this fic, the Nara clan is my favorite clan in the Naruto series and the next fic will show that. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's see, more development, check; more sass, check; another cliffhanger, check. Well, guys, this beautiful fic is nearing it's end but that doesn't mean that I don't want to hear from you guys! If you have a comment, write a review or send me a message! Don't forget to favorite and follow too! Love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**

* * *

 _Mitsuki_

They had been forgotten in all of the action, the Snake Sannin's son (maybe, ish, the details were still fuzzy) realized as he and Sarada sat with their comrades in Shikadai's backyard. Official, the genin had been sent to sleep so that they had some energy in case of an attack. The reality was none of them wanted to sleep as the moon got higher and higher.

"Do you think that they'll be alright?" Sarada sat next to him, her legs folded up to her chest as if the self-hug was comforting. Sarada's voice was muffled by her knees. Chocho rubbed her shoulder in comfort. Inojin open his mouth, a bit comment on his tongue when-

"Guys, we need your help!"

The teenagers jumped in their seats before looking upward at the window they were reclining against. Boruto's little sister and the youngest dimension hoppers (who should have been in bed hours ago) poked their heads over the edge.

"Can you read this and explain it in seven-year-old?" Benihime called down.

"He-hm."

"And four-year-old?!"

Mitsuki, given his snake arms ability, had no problem grabbing the papers from Himawari. But even he did a double-tack as he read the paperwork.

Patient: Temari Nara, Lady of the Nara Clan

Past Condition: Retained Placenta

Diagnosis: Unable to Carry Fetus Past Four Month Gestation 

"What's a placenta?" Asked Motoko innocently and the genin paled.

* * *

 **P.S. And you guys thought I forgot about the genin... Ok, I did a little...**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	20. Flashback no Jutsu

**Author's Note- She's alive! (Dodges a house, of all things) ... Well, hi guys! I'm back! Ok, so, I've finally rewritten the climax for this story and would you believe it, it caused more writer's block. This chapter was a monster to write because I wanted it to fit this plot line that I've created. Clearly, this story doesn't match what going on in the Boruto manga and anime but you know what, this is my story and my AU and I'm happy with this chapter and that's all that matters. In even better news, we've reached 100 REVIEWS! Yay! I'm so happy! As for the chapter itself, I'd describe it as creatively Uzumaki with Nara intelligence sprinkled here and there. You'll see what I mean. Ok, I've kept you waiting long enough! On to the story!**

Chapter 20: Flashback no Jutsu

 _Shikadai_

This fight was becoming a drag, Shikadai decided after the first few minutes passed because it was actually really boring. And repetitive because while numerous, these brainless puppets were nothing but flies. Annoying but easy to kill. And Boruto was-

"I'm keeping this thing." Boruto said for the fortieth time as he stabbed another puppet with electric 'awesomeness'. As you can see, Boruto was getting a little bit annoying.

"Hm." Shikadai slide through the legs of a puppet, his shadow spearing it as he moved.

Not that the blade wasn't awesome, because it was. Shikadai could tell that the katana had to be made with top-quality chakra metal. It hummed with its user's chakra system, becoming more of an extension of the shinobi rather than just a tool. There was something oddly familiar about Mira's blades. Like he had seen them before and couldn't figure out where. But that was neither here nor there. What was important was that they stopped Kaguya's resurrection.

"Like seriously, this sword reeks awesome." Make that forty-one.

"Hm."

"Are you even listening to me?" Shikadai sent the most deadpanned stared he could to his best friend, brother, whatever they were now as he threw a kunai over his shoulder. Now was not the time to give Boruto his attention.

Thud, BOOM! Got to love exploding paper tags.

"I started tuning you out after the first awesome."

"That's cold, man. I-" As Shikadai continued to tune out Boruto's rambles, the almost stupidly easy battle allowed his mind to veer to the thought that had been haunting him. His gaze landed on the cage, Dad at the top of it in his thinking position. And Auntie-

The scene kept replaying in his head, over and over again. The fear that ran through him as the wood nicked his flesh. The clanking of falling fans. The self-sacrifice of a mother that he didn't deserve because-

 _I'm not her child_. Shikadai had thought when he watched the Lady Hokage sacrifice her safety for his own. The mantra repeated over and over again in his head. _Why would she save me?_

Logically speaking, Auntie had absolutely no reason to save him from Zetsu's grasp. Yeah, sure, he was still technically a child but he wasn't _her_ child. Boruto and Himawari were still her blood, in a multi-dimensional universe kind of a way. If it had been one of them, Shikadai could understand why she did what she did. He could understand that look on Auntie's face when she realized that Zetsu had grabbed him. A look that he's seen before on a different, troublesome, blonde mother.

When Shikadai was six, his family had traveled to Suna to visit his uncles. To make a troublesome story short, Shikadai got kidnapped by Suna extremists who really hated the idea that Shikadai was, technically, still in line to become Kazekage. Afterall, the title of Kazekage was hereditary. Anyway, Mom had ripped through Suna worse than a sandstorm Biju when that happened and Suna was still recovering from it. She had been quite scary while she kicked major ass but what really stuck with him was that look on her face when he had been ripped away from her on that day.

Her teal eyes had race through every emotion possible. Surprise, confusion, recognition, distress, anger, and fear. So much fear had rippled through her being that day and the way she had held Shikadai when it was all over, both firmly and gently in her shaking yet safe arms told Shikadai just how much the thought of losing him terrified her. He had vowed, then and there, that no matter how troublesome it would be, he would do everything in his power to never see that look on his mother every again.

So, imagine his absolute surprise when that look appeared once again, in yet another moment of Shikadai-in-Distress (which he really needed to stop doing), on a woman who wasn't even his own mother. That look had appeared once again, on the face of a blonde mother with blue eyes and wind ninjutsu. A mother that wasn't his.

Baffled. That word best described how Shikadai felt. Absolutely baffle-

"Dude!" Shikadai ripped himself away from his thoughts at Boruto's concerned yelled. Looking at the blonde was different than what he was used to. And honestly, the glowing eye was pretty freaky. But Boruto stilled had that ever present look on his face. You know, that 'I'm worried about you, man, but don't worry, I'm here to help/kick butt' look? Yeah, that one.

"Come on, we need to get back to Dad now that Dad Mom is free! I'll cover us! Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu!" While Boruto couldn't make anywhere near the number of clones his father could, the sheer amount that he did make was more than enough for their escape.

He found himself sprinting along after Boruto but his eyes were solely on the humming gate. The chains creaked and moaned as the doors tried to shove themselves open. For a second, a gigantic byakugan eye glared through the slim opening between the door before they rattled as the alien tried to force her way out. The crack in the yin door seemed to split even more but refused to shatter, he realized when-

The earth split violently between them. So many things happened in those next seconds. Shikadai falling forward as the earth beneath his sandals rose. Boruto lunging after him, his hand grasping onto Dai's in a vice grip. He was trying to keep him anchored, Shikadai realized as the growing jungle cause him to soar in the air.

He knew what he had to do

"No, Dai!" Shikadai was deaf to Ruto's cry as he broke their link and allowed himself to be swept up above the valley's edge by the jungle.

"Gah!" Vines slithered and tightened around his limbs to immobilize him as a defiant scream sound to his left.

"Let go me, you sick perverted fuckup of an alien reject!" Clearly Mira's mastery over the international language of cursing was superior to his own. His counterpart was tangled up in her own web of vines and wasn't doing any better job of getting out as he was. They were shoved together, the recoil of their collusion caused stars in his eyes as Mira moaned at the pain. Their backs to each other, Shikadai could only move his hand to reach back and grab hers in comfort. However, the more he moved, though-

"Fucking hell." Shikadai hissed as the binding tightened. Which of course they did, he thought sardonically. Just their luck. Oh, and would you look at that, they were staring Kaguya at eye-level. Even better…

Her Hyuga like glare chilled his blood as the being hissed,

" _ **Yin… so full of yin…**_ " Another gray chakra arm formed in the gate's opening.

" _ **I NEED IT!**_ " The arm surged forward.

 _When I imagined dying, death by an alien and her crazy ass son wasn't it._ Death had always been a topic that Shikadai had pondered in his spare time. A completely normal topic of choice, I know. But like any Nara, he had planned his life early so that he wouldn't have any surprises in the future. It went a little something like this.

 _I'd pass the academy with average grades, not too good, not too bad. I'd be placed on a genin team in Ino-Shika-Cho formation, forever doomed to deal with Chocho's useless chatter and Inojin's lack-of-filter escapades that I'd have to clean up after. Several near-death instances later in my career as a chunin or jonin (still haven't worked out all of the details), I'd settle down with a girl who Mom approved of so that I wouldn't have to deal with the mother-in-law v. daughter-in-law drama. We'd have a few kids and I'd spend the rest of my days designing video games and battle strategies before dying a peaceful death in my sleep before my wife. A nice, carefree and leisurely life and death. Yep, that's the life I want._

So yes, this isn't how he wanted to die but (insert internal, lazy shrug of defeat) what can you do?

"Not today, bitch!"

Fortunately for him, Mira didn't possess any of hereditary Nara laziness and had enough Uzumaki will power for the both of them.

Slice, slice!

What the fu-

Chakra chains erupted from Mira as the ivy links tore the vines out from under them. As they freefall down to the earth, goosebumps rose on Shikadai's forearms as the chakra arm missed them by inches. So, plus side, he was still alive and Kaguya was still trapped.

"AH!" Bad side, he was currently falling to his death and his limited knowledge of wind ninjutsu did not include flying jutsus. An arm wrapped around his torso as Mira's chest pressed up against his back. Dai could barely make out the chain that she sent out. It wrapped itself around a branch before they were swung up into the safety of another tree. As he crouched on the limb, he whipped his gaze to the girl at his side. Something wasn't right here. She remained silent upon his inspection. Shikadai wanted to groan as he entered the familiar duel between his eyes and his brain, with the eyes saying one thing and the brain saying another. Once again, his brain won.

"Taka?" A surprised smirk etched her face before the brunette poofed away. Dirty blonde hair in the Nara style and lazy grin stood in her place.

"Good catch, man. Only Mom and Dad can tell when we switch places." So many questions swam through his head so he asked the most important question given their situation.

"You wear drag often?" His dry wit caused Taka to chuckle before sassing back,

"Nah, I leave that to Kaien for his dates with Daisuke." Kaien and Daisuke? Before he could ask another question, an explosion pulled him back to the fight. Dad and the real Mira looked like they were playing cat and mouse against Zetsu while also trying to help Boruto with guarding the two Hokages. The eldest Uzumakis seemed to be arguing while trying to draw out seals near the purple chakra hole.

"How the hell is he able to keep moving?" Taka groaned. "We should have gotten him by now."

They really should have. Besides their time crunch and pest of puppet shinobi, it should have been fairly rudimentary to catch Zetsu, especially since the Uchihas were still keeping Pyscho Haruno occupied. His brain twitched in thought as he traced Zetsu's seemingly erratic escapes as the alien seemed to leapt away every time his shadow was several feet away from Mira's shadow. But when Dad's shadow got within inches of his, he became even more chaotic and jerky. That's when it hit him.

"Taka."

"Yeah?"

"When your Dad killed the Zetsu in your world, how'd he do it exactly?" The blonde pondered the question before shrugging.

"Something about not being able to merge with Dad because of Dad's chakra."

 _ **Of course he couldn't merge with an Awakened Nara!**_ Shikadai flinched the dead matriarch barked in his mind. _**He doesn't even know what pure yin chakra is, let alone the true power behind the shadow style!**_

 _What do you mean?_ Talking to the dead shouldn't be possible, Shikadai knew that. He spared a glance at Taka. Then again, multi-dimensional universes and aliens weren't supposed to be possible either. The dead women huffed and he could almost visualize her crossing her arms in fury.

 _ **Those Otsutsukis thought that they were so special with their Kekkei Genkai that they forgot that they are nothing without the balance of yin and yang chakra. The blob's chakra is unbalanced and fake, a cheap version of yin chakra. He wouldn't know real yin chakra if it stabbed him with a kunai!**_

 _So what's real yin chakra then? Because he had to use yin chakra to get here._ He must have sounded like he was whining because the woman scoffed at his question.

 _ **Use your brain, boy. You've got all of the clues before you. Now, think.**_

Thinking. Normally, Shikadai was very good at thinking. But in that moment, his brain stopped thinking about the mess that was before him. Instead, he thought back to perhaps one of his earliest life lessons. The meaning of yin and yang.

What an odd concept, yin and yang? On first inspection, people assume that they're opposites, enemies, two beings that can't exist in harmony due to their polarity. However, oddly enough, it was Grandma Yoshino (not his mother or father) that explained the harmony the existed between yin and yang.

" _They are opposites." He remembers her saying as they mediated in the backyard. He had been six at the time, couldn't mediate worth shit due to his overactive, troublesome mind and had asked the question that was bugging him, 'Why are Mommy and Daddy together if they are so different?'_

" _Your parents are different, Shikadai and they like different things. Your mother is a wind-user, your father an earth one. Your father can sleep at any given moment," A ruefully loving smirk had graced the elder Nara's features, "while your mother is always moving. Your mother is from Suna and was raised in the most Suna way possible while your father is the quintessential Nara and Konoha shinobi." Grandma never shied away from using big words with him. She knew he could handle it._

" _If anything, your parents are yin and yang personified. On the outside, they're so different that it looks like they should clash horribly. And yet, they don't because they need each other's differences to find balance in their lives. Does that make sense, Shikadai?"_

It hadn't, at the time, at least. But right now, it did. His parents, the Lady Hokage and Commander Nara, hell, even Boruto's parents were to some degree living embodiments of yin and yang. They balanced each other out, pushed each other in the right direction with their differences while maintaining a harmony that shouldn't make sense.

And yet, somehow, it does.

Fascinating discoveries, Shikadai groaned at himself, but they mean nothing if they don't survive this.

Survive…

" _It all started when I died… The hag decided to stab me through the heart with her shadow. Somehow, I absorbed all of her chakra in the shadow. This chakra was actually yang chakra."_

That's it!

"Wait, Dai!" But he ignored the blonde's protests as he leapt down to ground level.

He thought of how his father, while a hero in his own right, was never truly pushed to his total limit while his counterpart had been. He thought of Mira and how her Uzumaki heritage had triggered their innate gift. He thought of his Suna heritage, his own chakra, the raw energy that overtook him as he became awakened.

Shikadai had the answer.

Time seemed to still as his shadow raced across the rocky terrain. It locked Zetsu in place before Mira's and Dad's grabbed him too. The three Shikas surround their captive in three-prongs with Shikadai at point, glaring down at their prisoner who couldn't move even if he tried. Popping sounded around them as the puppet shinobi seemed to freeze in midair before combusting. There were murmurs from the Uzumakis but those fell deaf as Shikadai rose to his tallest height.

"All of this time, you've been faking it." The accusation in his voice cause the undeniable look of fear to enter the alien-reject. "Even the wood style you use is nothing but a fake copout of the real thing. Yet you, Zetsu, aren't a creature filled with yin chakra. You're full of yang chakra." Zetsu sputtered as Dad and Mira found his train of thought. Their eyes sharpened as the puzzle pieces fell into place.

"Your lies-"

" _I am yin in its purest form._ " Mira's mocking tone silenced the alien. "If you were really full of yin chakra, why aren't you giving yourself up free mommy dearest?"

"I-"

"You tried, and failed during the war." Dad cut it in a voice so predatory that it sent shivers down Shikadai's spine. His dad hadn't been that anger, well, ever. "Infinite Tsukuyomi was so powerful because it was a yin-based genjutsu charged by the power of yang chakra. But in order for you to get it to work, you need the God Tree to consume all of the yang chakra it can out of its victims. Without yang chakra, Infinite Tsukuyomi, the ultimate yin genjutsu, is useless. You couldn't cast the genjutsu became you didn't have any real yin chakra while the amount of yang chakra you did have wasn't enough to grow the God tree. So where does that leave you, Zetsu?

"I-"

"You are useless." Dad continued going for the jugular. "You're like your puppet army to Kaguya. An annoyance, weak, and above all, disposable once used. Cheap. Useless. Copout."

"I will kill you all!" Zetsu screeched and withered against their held. That too was useless. "I am yin in its purest form! Mother just needs more than I could give her!" Shikadai raised an eyebrow as a wicked smirked graced his features.

"Wanna bet?"

 _Boruto_

"Now!" At Takashi's ordered, the Uzumaki half of the crew sprung into action to spring phase 2 of plan 'Sayonara Suckers' (Mira picked out the name). Dad and Dad Mom raced over to stalemate. They trailed Kurama chakra before skidding to a halt, Dad Mom between Mira and Uncle Shikamaru. Dad was opposite her. The advisor raised an eyebrow of 'what are you about to do?' which the Lord Hokage waved off before he started signing in tandem with his counterpart. The eldest Uzumakis slammed their palms to the ground as chakra lines sprouted off their backs.

Zig-zag etched the sand before glowing an ivy green. The lines rose from the earth before latching onto Zetsu. Chains bared down on the creature, who's howls echoed in the night. Orange chakra rose to encase itself over the ivy green, sealing the deal.

Get it? Sealing the deal?

 _Cricket, cricket._

Meanwhile-

"How the fuck does a giant purple hole disappear?!" Boruto yelled in disbelief as Taka raced next to him in their search for spot that the gate had came from. "Find the largest source of chakra? Newsflash, this whole canyon reeks of voodoo chakra!"

Was Boruto being slightly dramatic? Well of course he was. However, there was no way that they should have lost the hole where Zetsu had pulled out Kaguya's gate. It had to be some-

Boruto's right eye twitched. He resisted the urge to shiver as his eye caused his vision to zoom in and out. He could almost feel it as the eyeball spun and scanned the area from side to side before locking in on the densest part of the forest. It was then and there that he decided that no matter how useful his new Kekkei Genkai was, it was still pretty creepy. Boruto glanced at the moon's position before cursing.

Two minutes.

There was no way that they could create an opening fast enough to throw Zetsu back into the hole. The diamond seal on his palm warmed. Mira's words rang through his head.

" _Not just redirecting the attack. Amplifying the power of the ninjutsu with our own chakra."_

This was it. Boruto knew what he had to do.

"Attack me!" Taka did a double take at Boruto's order. "Attack me with the most powerful jutsu that you've got!"

"But-"

"Just do it!"

Was this plan stupid? Yes, yes it was. But if his dad had taught him anything in life, it was that sometimes you had to do something stupid in order to get the job done. Perhaps it was the look on his face that changed Taka's mind because the seriousness of soldier shrouded the taller blonde. Seconds later, green chakra eclipsed Taka's body. The veins in his face bulged as he got into position.

"The Fourth Gate: The Gate of Pain: Open!" Taka pulled back his fist as Boruto raised his right hand. The diamond seal pulsed and he won't lie, he prayed that his would work.

"Torrential Tsunami!"

The chakra left the punch. The seal on his hand burned as raw chakra raced through his system. _Don't pass out, don't pass out, don't pass out!_ In a knowledge of chakra that he could have only know through his Hyuga side (thanks, Mom), Boruto focused the outside power through his system before allowing it to build in his left palm. His own chakra turned with it, the energy escaping from it nearly breaking the sound barrier.

"RASENGAN!" Boruto threw the concentrated chakra at the forest. The sound barrier broke, the attack screeching as it plowed through anything and everything in its path. The attack was so deadly that the forest that Zetsu had created to stop them was no more. All that was left was the hole that leaked killing intent worse than the time he walked in on Sarada changing.

Hopefully Uncle Sasuke never finds out about that one.

"Woah there." He swayed backwards and would have fallen if it wasn't for the warm body of his best friend that caught him. Boruto blinked away the exhaustion as Shikadai slugged his arm over the brunette's shoulders. Where had he come from? "That was pretty badass, man." He must have blanked out for a few seconds because the next breath had Uncle Shikamaru before the duo as chaos ensued at the hole.

"What-"

"Just watch. We did it." Dai reassured.

One minute.

And did it, they did.

Taka and Dad Mom raced around the hole like a tornado, each of their steps creating a new seal. Above him he could hear the alien's caged protests as Kaguya tried to body slam her way through. Dad was doing that weird, Kurama Cloak Makes Me Fly, thing that he did next to the gate.

"A little more, too much, PERFECT!" Dad yelled down to where Mira seemed to have the straightjacketed Zetsu in a huge slingshot made out of her shadows. Mira adjusted her shadow.

"I WILL NOT BE-"

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!"

Well, that's not something you see every day, Boruto thought as Zetsu soar the air. The alien slammed into the crack in the yin door of the gate.

45 seconds.

"NOOOOOO!" Zetsu's screams of agony became louder as his body sunk deeper into the door. Instead of shattering, it seemed that Zetsu's chakra was filling in the cracks. "I WAS So – umh!" His mouth melted away as his entire torso disappeared. All that were left were his eyes before they too melted into the door.

The yin and yang kanjis on the gate shined as Kaguya roared in protest. Then the two kanji flipped so that the glowing blank character for yin showed on the snowy white yang door. The yang character, in its pearly white glow, seemed to pop off against the yin door's black coloring. Kaguya glared through the gate's opening one more time before the doors closed and locked themselves shut. Iron chained grow from the heaven kanji on the gate's lock. They entwined themselves together, locking Kaguya away for good.

30 seconds.

"Let's go, Kurama!" Dad yelled as more orange chakra covered him until he was the gigantic Kurama Tailed Beast Mode. You know, when Dad becomes a life size using only chakra alone? Yeah, that one. Dad grasped the top of the gate with one talon and the bottom of the gate with the other.

"ARGH!" Taking the gate over his head for leverage, Dad throw the gate back into the purple hole that it came from.

15 seconds.

The moment the last of the gate entered the hole, Dad Mom and Taka activated the seals and the earth moved itself back it place. The seals pulsed together. At the last second, Mira's shadow raced over the sealing, binding them all together.

3 heart beats sounded in the canyon.

Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum.

And it was done.

Time.

"Woah…" Boruto and Shikadai whispered in unison before a hand clamped down on each of their shoulders. The boys tilted their heads up to see Uncle Shikamaru was looking down at them in pride.

"Good job, boys. You've earned a rest."

Part of Boruto wanted to protest that claim, seeing as the last seconds of battle didn't included them at all. But another part of him was just so happy that it was all over that he didn't even care. Shikadai seemed to sink into his dad's side in relief that it was all over.

"Boruto!" He was too old to be held in his father's arms, with the man's fake hand raking his shaking fingers through Ruto's hair. Or at least, that's what he would have said before all of this had happened. And now, as he snaked his own arms around his dad to clutch the back of his shirt, Boruto relished in the feeling.

Because deep-down, he really, really missed his dad.

"I'm sorry." Ruto pulled back in surprise at his father's apology.

"For what?"

"I overreacted about the Kote during your Chunin Exams." Dad say what now? He barely processed what Dad was saying as his father continued to ramble,

"I taught you to be a shinobi and a shinobi uses whatever he can to survive on a mission. I can see why it's a useful tool and why you liked it. I was just afraid that you would get dependent on it and it would malfunction midbattle and you wouldn't know what to do and-"

"Dad!" The Hokage fell mute. "I get it. And I'm sorry too."

"Dad, the impossible has happened. Boruto's apologizing for something." Shut up, Shikadai. He was having a moment.

"I've been a brat, I shouldn't have cheated and I-" He sucked in a shaky breath. "I'm sorry for not listening to you." Boruto locked his gaze down at his sandals in guilt.

Because he really should have listened to his dad more. If he had, maybe he wouldn't have cheated. Maybe he wouldn't have acted like such a brat when Dad became the Hokage. Maybe he wouldn't have suggested that they go out to the backyard without an adult. Tonight wouldn't have happened if he had just listened to his Dad. Then a hand clapped down on his shoulder, causing Boruto to look up at his father's forgiving eyes, which he really didn't deserve.

"I'm sorry for not listening to you too." Dad confessed with a smile. "Shikamaru and I are going to fix our work structure around so that we're home more often. Right, Shikamaru?"

"Absolutely." There was resolve and certainty in Uncle Shikamaru's voice but that couldn't stop the doubt that creeped through Boruto. He blamed the years of wishfully thinking for this revelation to actually happen that to see it happening seemed too good to be true. Shikadai must have shared his doubt because the two asked in tandem,

"Really?" Their fathers looked up at each other, doing that weird eye-conversation thing that they could do before Dad stated firmly,

"Yes, I promise." Uncle Shikamaru suppressed a snort, a smile gracing his features as he added,

"Believe it." Laughter overtook Boruto and Shikadai. While very cheesy, it was all that they needed to hear to both lighten up the situation and have completely in their dads promise.

"Mom, not that we don't love you or anything but-" Mira's voice rang out, which was completely ruining the moment, only to be cut off by Taka.

"You're suffocating us." The fathers and sons of this dimension momentarily paused their yearly displays of affection to look back at the twins. Dad Mom knelt between the twins with them pulled so tight in her arms Ruto swore that Taka was turning blue.

"Hush, you two." The Lady Hokage started to pepper kisses on both of their cheeks, causing the twins to squirm and cuddle deeper into their mother. "After the hell you've raised, I can smother you as much as I please."

"Geeze, it looks like we missed all of the action."

"Hm."

Clearly everyone was still jumpy from the battle. Aunt Sakura yelped in surprise at all of the point object aimed in her direction while Uncle Sasuke looked on with an 'Is that all you got?' stare.

"Sasuke! Sakura! You're back!" Way to state the obvious, Dad. "What happened to Pyscho Haruno?" The Uchihas shared a look before Aunt Sakura shrugged.

"Dead. We killed her."

"How?" Dad Mom asked in a sharp tone. Her eyes scanned the area as if she was afraid that Pyscho Haruno would pop out at any moment.

"We burned her." There was something in the chill of Uncle Sasuke's voice that spoke volumes of what they really did.

"Amaterasu?" Uncle Shikamaru asked and received a nod in confirmation. A breeze chilled them as the reality of Psycho Haruno kicked in.

"You okay?" Aunt Sakura shrugged at Dad's question.

"It was my idea. That's how I got rid of Inner the first time around. I burned her away. I'll be fine." Inner?

"But-"

"Naruto." Uncle Sasuke interrupted as he allowed his only hand to grasped his wife's. "We'll be fine." Moments of silence passed. Then two. Then-

"Not to sound like Inojin but shouldn't we go home?" Shikadai called out in a drowsy tone that cause Boruto to yawn with him. Taka groaned before cracking his neck.

"Fine, I'll make the seal. Mira, get ready to activate it."

"In the meantime," Dad Mom raised an eyebrow at Dad. "A slingshot, huh?"

"Hey!" Dad whined. "It was a cool story when _your_ ," Dad wagged a finger back at his girl self, "kids told us all about it at lunch. I just modified it to fit our needs."

"It was one of your smarter idea."

"Thanks- Hey! Shikamaru!" The Lady Hokage seemed taken aback by the banter before throwing her head back in laughter.

"I loved it!" Dad Mom chuckled before raising her fist up to Dad. He hesitated for a second before fist bumping her back. "Next time though, give the mom a warning, ok? The twins know that they're not allowed to slingshot anyone after their previous escapade."

"Mom, that's so not fair!" Mira cut in. "Kenji volunteered to be our test dog."

"It's not like I wasn't going to be able to catch him."

"Shikamira, Kenji did not volunteer. You bribed him with steak."

"Tomato, tomahto."

"As for you, Takashi." Dad Mom rubbed her temples. "When I told you that you needed more motivation to get faster, flinging your friend across Konoha, while great motivation, isn't what I meant."

"But it still worked."

"…I can't win with you two."

As Taka prepared the seal to bring them back to Konoha, it seemed as if it was going to be a peaceful ride back to the village when-

"Kids, what happened to your father?" Immediately Taka and Dai froze while the rest of the adults shared a look of 'ah, fuck.'

"Well Mom, um, you've got to promise not to be too mad."

"…What did he do?"

Needless to say, the Commander's actions sent the Lady Hokage in a tizzy. (Boruto need to come up for something else to call the man seeing as he was his other-dimensional stepdad-ish.) After a real cool ride through the seal and a not so cool landing in the Nara backyard, the group of nine had returned to Konoha with surprising minor injuries. Only Uncle Shikamaru needed a serious healing seal for his left arm, which Taka slapped on him like a band-aid while grumbling, 'you should have said something sooner, Other Dad. Why is it whenever you get hurt, your sense of self-preservation stops functioning properly?'.

Boruto started to untangle himself from the dogpile that their group landing had created, he could barely make out the charred remains of Aunt Temari's petunia garden. His snickers attracted Shikadai's attention.

"What's up?" Boruto shrugged before slinging his best friend into a headlock.

"And to think, you didn't want to train on your day-off." Shikadai's scathing glare would have been terrifying if he hadn't started laughing seconds later.

"BORUTO!"

"Eip!" Poor Shikadai was standing next to air as Boruto was poked and probed by his mother. Behind her was Granny Tsunade with what looked like an IV in her hand. Granny seemed to be locked on something behind him but he couldn't escape his mother's smothering to look back.

"Mom…" Mom's fingers pried open his right eye, firmly but gently, her Byakugan scanning him over. "I'm fine."

"Those are two words that no mother ever believes." Mom kissed his forehead before whispering. "I'm just glad that you're safe."

"Preach, Hinata, preach." Dad Mom stepped forward. Ruto let his mother drag him away as the two women with Uzumaki blood stared each other in the night light. The light escaping the compound only seemed to highlight the eerie similarities between the women. Which was kind of weird when he thought about but-

"Granny, you're back!" Dad bulldozed through the stare-down in his usual, smiling brashness. If anything, his Mom's grip on Boruto's shoulders got tighter which was also weird. "You see, this may seem really hard to believe but this is-"

"I know who this is Naruto." Granny's voice shook for one heartbeat before becoming the comforting steady tone he had grown up with. "It's nice to meet you…"

Well, this was awkward. To make the awkwardness even worse, Dad Mom looked like she was standing on eggshells. She seemed nervous. She kept glancing back and forth at Granny and her counterpart before the rambling started to spill out.

"You can call me Naruto- Or Uzumaki, actually! That'd be way less confusing, especially with there being two of us, you know? Granny, can I call you Granny? Screw it, I'm calling you Granny with or without your permission. Meet your interdimensional great grandbabies, Shikamira and Takashi. They're about Shikadai and Boruto's age. And I've got two other kids-"

"Benihime and Motoko, I met them. They were worried about your… husband and had a hard time sleeping. He's inside if you want to see him." And like that, Granny was able to turn the conversation a complete 180 and distract Dad Mom, who's nervousness morphed into worry.

This was going down as the weirdest night of his life, Boruto decided as Shikadai slumped up next to him as the group migrated inside.

"What was that all about?"

"I've got no idea." Boruto narrowed in on the twins who were hovering over the couch their dad laid on. Granny was in full doctor mode as she went on about how dangerously stupid the Commander's actions were to his health. Their mom was sat in a chair pulled up next against him, their fingers laced together. "But I know who does."

The next hour was full of greetings, 'Yay, you guys didn't die!' and hugs that Boruto couldn't wait to sleep. Mira had already resorted to using Taka as her mode of transport to her bed for the night with a 'I was almost dinner for alien tonight; the least you can do is give me a piggyback ride to bed'. Dai slowly lead them to his bedroom, which had become the sleepover spot for all of the kids. Dai had opened the door slowly, thinking that everyone would be sound asleep.

"Boruto, Shikadai, you're back!"

"Mira, Taka!"

Beni and Hima vaulted over the genin in their mission to land bear hugs on them. The other genin where smiling at them and demanding questions which became totally unimportant when Beni blurted out,

"Taka! We're going to get Shikadai a little sister and we need you to fix my seal!"

…

"WHAT?!"

 **Author's Note- Well, what do you guys think?! I think my only downside to this chapter was the short explanation about how the the Uchihas defeated Psycho Haruno. However, explaining that would have required another POV in this chapter and it just didn't fit. I'll probably do a one-shot explaining my idea behind Psycho Haruno's characterization. Here's the basic idea: after the original Naruto ended and we moved into Shippuden, Inner Sakura basically disappeared from the show. My theory is that Canon Sakura rejected/defeated/stopped listening to Inner Sakura and we never hear about Inner Sakura ever again. So my Psycho Haruno is basically a what if Inner Sakura took over in 2.0 Sakura's lowest point. Does that make any sense? Eitherway, the Uchihas weren't the main part of the story, which is why I gave them minimal screen time. What else? I think that's it. I hope you guys love this chapter! Please review, favorite and follow! I want to hear from you! Love you guys! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**

* * *

 _Temari_

Temari couldn't sleep, even after all of the excitement and utter relief of seeing the return of her husband and son after the rescue mission. Shikamaru was dead to the world beside her and she didn't want to wake him with all of her tossing and turning. After 30 minutes of just starting into nothingness, she decided to go for the oldest trick in the book for moments like these.

A glass of warmed milk.

Her journey to her kitchen was so natural that she could almost forget that her house was packed with all of their friends, their friends' kids and a Shikamaru from another dimension who happened to be married to a female version of their hokage with four children.

Almost was the key word.

Especially when Temari entered into the threshold of her living room to find said duplicate of her husband still conscious on the couch. Apparently the idiot's attempt at communicating with her husband had drained his chakra to the point where he was unconscious once again. Temari moved towards the couch to check on him when movement caught her eye. She wasn't the only blonde that was awake.

"Can't sleep?" Temari's whisper echoed through the room as the Lady Hokage sat up in the futon they had set up next to the sofa earlier. The girl Naruto shrugged with a wishful smile.

"It's 3:30." She whispered back as if that explained everything, which it did. It was time for the Traditional Morning Training and the only reason Shikamaru and Shikadai weren't awake right now was because they were completely exhausted from tonight's escapade. "And I haven't been sleeping properly the past few days."

"Ah."

The women fell silent and Temari couldn't help but examine the other Lady Nara before her. While shorter than Temari, Girl Naruto's blonde hair had more of golden tint to it. Both women had exotic features, from their lighter and brighter eyes to the wind release that they wield with their fans. They shared the same slightly larger, but not too large, bust and long shapely legs, which Shikamaru had always been a sucker for. Frankly, Temari had no reason to be jealous in the fact that her husband (and his counterpart) had good taste in women.

"I'm sorry." Temari blinked at Girl Naruto's apology.

"For what?" Girl Naruto shrugged bashfully.

"I'd wouldn't want another woman coming into my home with my title, you know? I'd feel a little threatened and I'm sorry if I made you feel that way. I feel bad that we put you all in this situation, made things really awkward and brought up a lot of bad memories."

Ah, the baby. In any other instance, Temari would have flinched and thrown up her walls to prevent the wave of hurt over the lost of her second baby. Except, she felt a sort of kinship with the woman before her. They both loved the same man (figuratively speaking) and loved his clan very much. Temari could see them getting along and she wasn't going to lie, the Nara Uzumaki kids have really grown on her. She felt bad over her treatment of Motoko and wanted to remede that. Besides, any woman that would sacrifice themselves to protect her baby boy was okay in her books.

"Are we friends in your world?" Girl Naruto was taken aback by her question before confirming.

"Yeah, we're penpals, actually."

"How'd you like to be friends in this world too?" Temari could see the disbelief on the other mother's face. "I'd think we'd freak out our men more if we got along instead of hating each other. What you think?" A mischievous smile spread as Girl Naruto's face.

"You've got yourself a deal."

* * *

 **P.S. - This scene needed to happen and I'd be damned if I didn't add it in. I hope you liked it!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


	21. Whatever You Say, Dear

**Author's Note - Hey guys, I'm back and with a new chapter in less than six months! So, this beauty is finishing up (I know, I'm crying too just thinking about it). However, I still have a few things I need to do so we'll see what happens. Now, is the first section of this chapter completely unnecessary? Eh, probably, but I was like, screw it, this is my filler and I love it and I think you guys will too. Besides, I needed some more humor in this and what better humor is there than eccentric personalities and slapstick? Also, the second half of the chapter is just my obsession with the Nara clan coming together in my writing. But you'll need to read to see what I mean. I hope you guys like it! On to the story!**

Chapter 21: Whatever You Say, Dear

 **Meanwhile: in Konoha 2.0**

 _Ichiro_

It's needless to say that Ichiro Hyuga, heir to the Hyuga clan, adopted son of Lady Hinata Hyuga and Vice-Commander Kiba Inuzuka, dual citizen of Konoha and Suna-

"What part of 'I'm not talking to you,' aren't you getting?!"

"The fact that every time I ignore you, you decide to start going on about me flirting with the client. Which for the million time, I wasn't flirting."

"What were you doing then if you weren't (bunny-ears) flirting?"

"I was getting information from him-"

"By flirting!"

Ichiro's left eyebrow was ticking again.

-Does not do drama. Or yelling. Or sobbing. Or any of the other forms of belligerent sexual tension ridden fighting that was oozing out of the male members of Team 4 since they had arrived last night. At 11:00 pm. By kicking down the door. Not to mention it was now 10:00 am the next day, the duo had bickered all night and the female member of Team 4-

Click, click.

Was doing absolutely nothing to stop them.

"Are you taking pictures?" His best friend, Mirai Sarutobi, asked her godfather's female student in disbelief.

"It's for blackmail and art inspiration, duh." The meek looking Retsu explained as she adjusted her phone's camera for a better angle. Ichiro repressed his own snort at his thoughts. As if you would describe Retsu as meek on the battlefield, the crazy she-witch. She pushed her wiry glasses back into place as a disturbing blush rouged her normally icy visage. "I'll call the piece, 'The Consequences of a Sex Free Mission.' It'll be glorious."

At his side, Mirai facepalmed with the rest of the 'Konoha 11 Kids' that were having breakfast in the Nara Uzumaki dining room. The temptation to join in the facepalming was strong but Ichiro restrained himself _. I am a Hyuga_ , he reminded himself. _Hyugas do not use their monthly facepalms lightly._ (Well, Kenji does but he was half Inuzuka so it didn't count.) Even though it was very tempting, especially, when he considered the fact that his own genin team was far better behaved than the Commander Nara's fulling grown, adult, Jonin team.

Ichiro's exhaustion wasn't doing his patience any favors either. When his team was given the task of escorting the Sand Ambassador (and his genins/little cousins), Ichiro knew that that spelled trouble. Granted, he got along with Haji just fine. The boys were the same age and Haji (being the son of the Fifth Kazekage, Temari) always had interesting topics to debate over. Sadly, the same could not be said of their respective genin teams, who had a deep hatred for each other after the results of the last Chunin exam. The teams bickering led to his pounding headache and Ichiro couldn't help but praise the deities that the Sand crew decided to stay in a hotel this time around instead of the Nara compound like they normally do.

… On second thought, maybe his team wasn't any better than Team 4 when it came to bickering.

However, Ichiro paused as he remembered that time, he and Mirai were seven and were kidnapped from the Academy playground by anti-alliance traitors (a horribly ironic name in his humble opinion). It had been then Chunin Team 4 who were returning from their mission from the Land of Snow that had intercepted the would-be kidnappers. Was Team 4 crazy? Absolutely. Was Team 4 deadly and powerful?

Even more so.

"Aren't you going to stop them?" As always, Ichiro found himself being the voice of reason.

"Nope." Retsu popped the 'p' as she reclined back in her dining room chair. "I've been dealing with this since Kumo. They're Sensei's problem now."

"Uh, how?" Chocho asked as she reached for more juice.

"Isn't it obvious?" Retsu deadpanned. His brother, the dumbass that Kenji was, opened his mouth to answer. "Don't answer. It was rhetorical. Where was I? Oh right. The babes get sent to a different dimension, Sensei and Miss Naruto go after them and no one thought to tell us. I am hurt. Very hurt." She covered a hand across her heart, as if she was having heart palpitations. "And in retribution for this level of hurt, Sensei gets to fix those two dumbasses for not taking us with him." Such a drama queen.

"Just wait till they find out about the sex-changes-ow!" Ichiro leveled his best 'shut up, you idiot' glare at his little brother as Kenji rubbed his shin.

"Huh?" Yeah, the executive decision to not tell Team 4 about the other dimension's Lord Hokage was definitely the right decision.

"Nothing, Retsu!" Sarada covered up quickly. "Could you pass the-"

"Oi, brats, taking your peacocking outside where I can't hear it!" Dad yelled into the hallway as he marched into the living room.

"Do you think Dad knows that peacocking is a straight guy trying to impress a girl, right?" Kenji muttered. Ichiro shrugged as he glanced that the most feminine looking man in the room, which wasn't him, for once. _Well, it wouldn't be the first time that Kaien's been mistaken for a girl._

It was like a stampede was rooming the halls as the older generation entered into the living room. In his opinion, it was ridiculously unfair that they weren't allowed in when the Lady Hokage was calling in with an update (since he was still in shinobi mode, he was trying to keep referring to his aunt and uncle by their official titles). Granted, his eyes locked on Sarada, given the amount of drama surrounding himself and Sarada, it was probably a good thing that they were out of the room.

"This is so unfair- Screw it." The room turned back to Retsu as the woman pushed herself upright. "Anyone else want to do what shinobi are supposed to do and spy on the adults?"

Ichiro shared a look with Mirai, whose red eyes gleamed at the idea. He could tell that, to a degree, Mirai felt close to and perhaps even more of the level of hurt that Retsu had expressed early. While being her overly dramatic self, it was clear that Retsu was both hurt and worried about the whole situation. But when he thought about it, it made sense and he couldn't help comparing it to his own family.

His family was a hodgepodge of the blending of two complete opposite clans with another nation that likes to visit on the holidays. His parents' relationship had been a scandal in their teenage years which became even more dramatic before and after Mom took over as the Lady Hyuga. Then there was the whole, is Kenji a Hyuga or Inuzuka, scene. Not to mention that his parents didn't marry until Kenji was about to be born.

No, literally, they had been celebrating their marriage when Mom went into labor. Thanks, Dad, for that information.

Ichiro always felt that he tittered on a fine line with his families. Turns out, even though most Hyugas had worked with Inuzukas at least once in their life, the two clans clashed.

Badly.

While Grandfather Hiashi and Grandma Tsume had been teammates, there was so much to their story left unknown that made any dinner with them an instant contender for 'The Most Uncomfortable Dinner Ever!' Aunt Hana was cool, especially when she let her dogs lose on Dad, and was probably the sanest one in the family, ironically. Her kids, on the other hand, were little shits that Ichiro had to restrain himself from strangling them whenever they visited.

Then there was Aunt Hanabi with Uncle Konohamaru who were so on again, off again, that the Hyuga-Inuzuka kids kept calling Konohamaru Uncle for the convenience of it all. Don't even get him started on Uncle Shino and his everchanging girlfriend of the month. Ichiro and Mirai even tried stalking Uncle Shino once just to see how he was able to get so many girls. The key word was tried. Granted, Uncle Shino was by far his favorite uncle and him being Ichiro's academy sensei was cool, until Mirai started to show what happens when you're raised by the, quote, pranking gods of Konoha and he got caught in the girl's mess very, freaking, time.

Finally, there was his Suna side. His birth mother; the woman he really didn't know what to think about her. Ichiro sighed to himself softly at the thought of their meeting when he had become the Leaf ambassador to Suna.

What do you do when a woman loves you so much that she sacrificed her own happiness for him to grow up the way his birth father wished him to?

Clearly, Ichiro shook the thoughts out of his head, families in Konoha were messy to say the least.

The best example was the Nara Uzumakis, obviously. It was a known secret to literally every shinobi on this side of Konoha and beyond that Commander Nara had officially and unofficially adopted his genin team when he learned that Kaien and Retsu hadn't found a place to stay when the orphanage's old matron had kicked then out when they became genin and refused to give her money.

That matron no longer runs the orphanage and orphaned genin do receive a stipend for housing.

As for Daisuke, the civilian-raised shinobi ran away to the Nara compound after continuous pressure to quit and a horrid lack of understanding from his wealthy (like Daimyo level wealthy) parents. In short, Team 4 had been raised by a couple that in reality was barely older than them but to Team 4, that didn't matter. As far as Team 4 was concerned, the Lady Hokage and Commander Nara were their parents and they were completely cool with it.

And then there was Mirai, who was moved into a little house on Nara land after her mother gave birth to her because the Sarutobi housing had been destroyed during the Pein invasion. The temporary housing soon became permanent and it was natural for Mirai to be rotated between her mother, Commander Nara and the Lady Hokage.

Now, let's not be mistaken, Aunt Kurenai is an amazing mother to Mirai and was by no means neglecting her daughter. However, a kunoichi of Kurenai's caliber was too important to not have back in the field post-war. Especially with the complete rehaul of the kunoichi curriculum in the Academy that Aunt Kurenai helped to create. As a result, the "multi-parenting system" as Mirai likes to call it became the Third's granddaughter's family.

Not to mention the fact that Mirai is still on the shinobi's "Break Heart and Die a Painful Death" list because no one (read carefully, _no one_ ) breaks the heart of Commander Nara's girls and lives to see the next morning. May the poor bastard that broke Retsu's heart have fun forever cleaning the shit-hole of all outposts in the Land of Snow while freezing his balls off.

So yeah, families in Konoha, both messy-

"That's a great idea, Retsu. Come on, Kaien-"

"Still not talking to you."

"Can't you two get a room and makeup already? This is getting ridiculous." Mirai rolled her eyes in sync with Retsu.

-and bat-shit crazy.

Spying on shinobi shouldn't really be this easy. However, the gang was in the Nara-Uzumaki household which meant that it was riddled with more trap doors and spying hatches than the entirety of Konoha. Apparently, when Aunt Naruto and Uncle Shikamaru had officially became the Lord and Lady Nara, they had decided to keep all of the hidden spots in the main house from their interesting childhood. Their logic (ok, Aunt Naruto's logic) was that their kids should know how to spy _without getting caught_. They were raising shinobi, afterall. If anything, they gave their kids incentive to be the noisy little shits that they were today ( _cough, Mirai, cough_ ).

Kind of like the time Mira and Taka eavesdropped on Shino and the other sensei to figure out what their graduation exam would be and then proceed to screw with all the senseis. To which the Lady Hokage had laughed/scolded 'if you didn't want the brats to know about the exam, you shouldn't have talked about it at the academy!' Naturally the Commander proceeded to give remedial training to all of the senseis while giving the twins their first C-rank mission pay, the lucky bastards.

The point is that Aunt Naruto and Uncle Shikamaru practically invented a how-to-raise-a-growing-shinobi parenting style that encourage things like spying (a _totally_ normal shinobi trait), pranking (the amount of planning that went into the twins pranks outshone most tacticians), cheating (Mirai didn't even know the definition of a fair fight when she was a genin; RIP Sensei's balls), etc.

So, a vent with a seal that made the tiny vent huge on the inside while giving the kids the ability to listen to every word of the conversation in the living room? A perfectly normal thing to find in the Nara-Uzumaki household.

"Ow!"

"Dude, that is my spleen."

"Chocho, your butt is in my face. My face!"

"How unyouthful this-"

"Sh! You idiots, I can't hear anything!"

Too bad the vent still made them feel like a can of sardines. Ichiro was about to say that this was a horrible idea, yet again, when-

"Leaf HURRICANE!"

Crack!

"AH!"

They fell through the opening in the ceiling that Uncle Lee had caused, thus creating a lovely dogpile in the center of the living room. Only Sarada was saved by her father, who shot a death glare at Uncle Lee which should have killed him. The adults gaped at them before turning to Uncle Lee. The green spandex-wearing man rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"I thought that we were being spied on by enemy forces."

"God dammit, Lee! This is why I have a training field under the house so we don't destroy my house!" Aunt Naruto's voice rang out.

Ichiro was taken aback by the wall/inter dimensional video screen. It was weird seeing the duplicates of his parents and their friends from a different world. It was even weirder seeing the smaller number of kids in that dimension. He also couldn't help but notice the vastly unequal number between boys and girls in the younger generation. He put that information away for later

"My apologies, Naruto! I shall rebuild it! If not, I will run around Konoha 10,000 times on my hands!"

"Yosh!" Oh god, there's four of them.

"You do you, Lee." Aunt Naruto sweatdropped. "You do you."

"Ah man, guys. That was our favorite vent." Mira whined out. At her side was a mini of Uncle Shikamaru and blonde-haired boy with whiskers who mouthed to each other,

"Favorite vent?"

"Anyway," Mom interjected. "When are you guys coming home?"

"The council is starting to asking questions." Aunt Naruto opened her mouth to answer when Lord Sixth cut her off. "And no, telling them that you're having your fifth honeymoon isn't working."

"Dammit. Whatever, we'll probably be home tonight or tomorrow at the latest." The Lady Seventh explained. "We're waiting to see how Shikamaru is feeling before we head back." He could feel Team 4's collective back straightening. Daisuke and Kaien even halted their bickering over the idea that their sensei may be injured.

"What?" Ow! Ichiro glared back at Retsu as the older girl shoved Inojin into him. "Is Sensei hurt? Again?"

"Why am I not surprised?" Daisuke muttered.

"Your lack of faith in Sensei is surprising."

"What happened to not talking to me?"

"Why you-" Well, that was short-lived.

"Sensei?" The Aunt Ino behind the screen asked. "Does your Shikamaru have a genin team?"

"What? Yours doesn't?" At the collective nod from everyone in the other dimension, Aunt Naruto groaned. "Great, well I guess we need more introductions then. The girl in the chainmail midi skirt with glasses is Retsu while the two boys fighting are Daisuke and Kaien."

Confusion rippled the other side for two beats until-

"That's a boy?" Ugh, great going, Dad Married to a Cat Lady.

"Excuse you!" Kaien huffed in horror. "I am the epitome of manliness." Daisuke snorted loudly.

"In a mini skirt?"

"This is a battle yukata made to hide more kunais than you would know how to handle, you uncultured, unfabulous swine!"

"How could I be uncultured if you bought and designed all of my uniforms?"

"Your unfabulousness tarnishes all of my previous efforts."

"What the-"

SMACK, smack.

"Will you two shut up already?!" Retsu snapped at them, while Mirai rolled her eyes at them.

"If you couldn't tell, Auntie, they've missed you guys and Retsu has a migraine."

"No thanks to you morons."

"Happy to help." Of course they would stop fighting at Retsu's expanse.

"I'll kill you both, slowly." Laugher burst on the other side and Ichiro had to do a double-tack. What was Lady Temari doing in the other dimension's version of Konoha?

"This is brilliant!" The Suna woman cackled. "These brats are Shikamaru's?" Aunt Naruto started to chuckle with her.

"Yep, these are the hellions known as Team 4. We like to send them on missions to quote 'blow shit up,' end quote. Shikamaru is just supposed to make sure that they don't cause too much damage."

"That's hilarious!" No fucking way… Ichiro couldn't believe it when Lady Temari shifted slightly, revealing the Nara clan symbol on her shoulder. How the hell does Uncle Shikamaru always get the hot blonde who also kick major ass?

A flash of orange drew Ichiro to the side of the screen. The lanky, short-haired and moderately buff male version of their Hokage in – were those sweatpants? Lazily striding next to him was a beardless version of their Commander into what look like navy shinobi style jumpsuit and a lab coat. Speaking of Uncle Shikamaru-

"SENSEI?! There's two of you?! And what happened to your beard?!" Retsu gasped dramatically. Huh, the beard really did make the goatee look better. The Uncle Shikamaru without the beard looked like a deer in headlights (ha, dad jokes) at Retsu's bipolarness. Beside him was their Commander, rubbing his temples as he fought off another headache caused by Team 4.

Well, at least it couldn't get any wor-

"What the hell? Is Miss Naruto a man now?!"

"And a hot one at that."

"Kaien!"

He stands corrected.

"This is why we want you guys to visit." Taka said to his counterpart in his sarcastic drawl. "Because our family isn't insane enough as it is."

 **Back to Konoha 1.0**

 _Commander Nara_

Darkness.

Normally, darkness was Shikamaru's friend, his loyal ally, his most powerful tool. But in this, this abbess that he was wandering through, it was a troublesome nuisance. His family, his wife, needed him to be conscious and Shikamaru had neither the time nor the patience to deal with this roadblock. It didn't matter what he felt, how much he continued to grumble under his breath. He knew where he was going. His black surroundings lightened with every step forward until he crossed the bright, slivery threshold.

The forest that he ventured into dwarfed that of Konoha's own Nara forest. It smothered back most of the sunlight, the remaining light peeking through became his only guide through the shadows. The smell of wood burning indicated his arrival before his eyes adjusted. The shadows seemed to rescind back, removing the protection layer to reveal the campground to him.

"It's about time, boy. The tea is done."

Shika Nara sat behind the fire pit. Her robes consisted of furs, pelts, and shadows that melted into her surroundings. Her hood was pulled back, her silver hair cascading down her petite frame. She was once a beautiful woman, Shikamaru could tell, but-

The ancestor turned to face him, her golden-brown gaze locking with his own and he resisted the urge to flinch back. Before his eyes, he watched as her aged beauty flickered and the ugliness of a hag over took her. Then the beauty returned, then the ugliness. The two polar opposites clashed against one another. None of this mattered to Shikamaru. He needed to leave.

"What do you want?" Shikamaru made no move to sit, even as the founding mother of his clan raised a delicately, furry eyebrow at his snark. Her hand twitched and he tightened as her shadow gripped a hold of his. It tugged his forward but in an act of strength and defiance, he resisted her hold.

"Good." She purred. Mother Nara reached into the fire, ignoring the flames and the heat emanating from the pot as she gripped the ceramic handle to pour her tea. "You've gotten stronger." She took a sip, her full lips withering as they touched the cup. When she pulled back, they were back to their fullness.

"To answer your question, I wanted to speak with you. You've been ignoring me." Of course he was ignoring her. She, like the rest of the women in his life, caused him nothing but trouble. Shikamaru glared down at her.

"So you decide to haunt Shikamira and Shikadai instead?"

"Obviously." She waved off his question, as if it was the stupidest question she ever heard. "It was necessary to communicate with them, Shikamaru. They weren't ready to face the Otsutsuki alone and the you in this world does a better job at ignoring me than you do. Would you rather I let them die?" She was challenging him again. His hands curled into fists and he wanted nothing more than to punch her. While it was extremely out of character for him to be this aggressive, he was done. He was done with this 'Awakened Nara' nonsense. He was done with dealing with beings that defied logic, like aliens, the semi-immortal assholes, and the dead. He was…

Shikamaru tilted his head upward. The slimmer of light warmed his cheeks. He forced himself to calm down. To still the never-ending thoughts that energized and crippled his brain. To let go the nerves, worry and anger over the unknown state of his family. To forget the fact that he didn't even know what had become of his wife and daughter.

His nerves were shot. They had been since the kids disappeared. Even their brief reunion did nothing to ease Shikamaru's paranoia, and rightful so, given what happened. And yet, Shikamaru breathed out a heavy sigh, there was nothing else he could have done.

And that's what angered him the most.

He sat down and accepted the tea that the hag passed him. She was waiting for him to finish contemplating everything and for him to let go of his anger.

As a key pillar in the life of Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru had learned that absolutely anything is possible with her. In order to stay alive, and keep his sanity, he had learned to go with the flow. Attacked by a Sannin during their Chunin Exams, of course it happened to her. Becoming friends with Konoha's oldest enemies, a completely normal occurrence. Hunted by a group that wanted Kurama, all in a day's work. The kids traveling to a different dimension, honestly he should have seen that one coming.

The point was, Shikamaru Nara was used to weird, logic defying stuff happening to Naruto. He had accepted it. That didn't mean that he had to like it.

It was like the time he was forced to stay as the Kages (and his twins and Sasuke, unknowingly to him at the time) went to rescue Naruto during the Chunin Exams. He couldn't leave, because as Jonin Commander, it was Shikamaru who had to lead Konoha in their Hokage's absence. He had to put on a brave face and wait. Wait for their Hokage to be rescued.

For his wife to be rescued.

At least this time, Shikamaru knew that he could trust his copycat and Naruto's male self 150%.

Still, that primal instinct within every man, the desire to protect his woman and kin, burned so deeply through him that he hated any situation where _he_ had no control and where _he_ could do nothing to remedy the situation.

"What do you want?" Shikamaru gave in as he questioned his ancestor. She leaned back to level her gaze at him. Her face continued to shift.

"Oh, I wanted many things. I wanted to see you reach your full potential and I made that happen."

"You stabbed me with your shadow!" Shikamaru protested only to wither back at her glare.

"It was necessary! Your yin chakra needed a catalyst to awaken it. You were dead at the hands of a man playing god because you refused to reach out and seize your innate power!" She snapped back in a furry. "The only reason any of you survived against him was because of your wife. You should be thanking me, you insulant boy. Your wife's lineage and I are the reasons that will never happen again to you or any of your children."

"Look, it's not that I'm not grateful for that." Because, honestly, he was grateful for her actions that day. "What I'm asking is why did it have to be our clan?" Her face seemed to softened. She picked up on the resignation in his voice.

"What I've always wanted," The gold in her eyes burned. "is for our clan to succeed like no other clan has. To become so respected and ingrained in a place that to remove our clan would lead to that place's ultimate destruction. To grow and prosper in the shadows like the true shinobi that we are. Silent, steady and deadly. That is what I want."

"You want world domination?" That would be the logical train of thought, except she snorted at the questioned.

"World domination? Only a fool would wish for that and we Naras are no fools." She waved her hand in the air, the shadows in the tree line pulled toward her to glove her wrinkled skin. "No, I want us to be the clan that world can't live without because of our knowledge, our strength, our ingenuity. We are the clan that others go to when the world goes to hell, Shikamaru. That is what I want. That is what I've always wanted. That is why I gambled with the Shinigami for us to have the yin chakra that we do. That is why I look as I do, so that I can be in the voice in your brain when you're about to get yourself killed. It is a great honor for a clan to weld such power."

He knew that, and there would always be a part of him that respected her for it. He knew that she gambled with the gods to bless her progeny with this gift over yin chakra. He knew that she let the Shinigami destroy her vanity and image so that she could communicate from the other side. He respected the love that she had for the Nara clan. He just hated all of the work she caused him. What was with women and their constant need to give him more work?

"But we never wanted it."

"And that is why we have it."

"Gee, thanks." He grumbled as he watched the shadows on her hand become a ball of light. "You starting to sound like my gran-"

"Ah, Haruka Sarutobi, now that was a smart woman. Very worthy to be the Lady Nara." Shika Nara complimented his grandmother as if she knew her personally. Given his luck, she probably did. "She saw the greatness in our clan while everyone else was blinded by what they believed. Alas, that is neither here nor there."

A chill blew through the leaves. The flames next to them shrunk before roaring back with a greater force. The woman before him looked more ghoul like than normal.

"Our time is growing shorter, child." Shikamaru repressed the urge to argue that he was no longer a child. "Luckily, Shikadai is now awakened. With his new power, he can face what is to come." That got his attention.

"What do you mean? What's coming?" The hag smirked at him.

"Perhaps your children will face it, perhaps they won't. These multiple dimensions do complicate matters." She didn't flinch as he reached forward to fist the collar of her robes.

"What's coming?" Shikamaru growled down at her. He didn't have time for her mind games. His kids, and yes, that included Shikadai, were in danger and he'd be damned if he didn't get answers. Shika Nara's smirk deepened.

"Now if I told you that, you'd lose your paranoia. Paranoia has always been a good ally for you, boy. I suggest you tell yourself what you've learned. Perhaps that'll motivate him to listen to his instincts."

"And you." She shrugged halfheartedly.

"That too." The wind was starting to pick up around them. It howled in his ears. "Awake up, Shikamaru Nara. Remember, only we are Fertile with Yin."

Suddenly, she melted out of his grasp as the ground shook beneath him. Shikamaru rushed to stand as the trees began to tumble. He sprinted to the tree closest to him. He ran up the tree, leapt through it branches before launching himself through the leaves into the sunlight.

He struggled to pry his eyes open. It felt like a dream, his conversation with Shika Nara. Expect he knew better than to question it. At least this time, she didn't stab him with her shadow.

Finally, his eyes opened to the sight of a familiar mahogany ceiling. Laughter and chatter hummed in the distance and for a spilt second, he thought that he was in his own house.

"Fucking A." Shikamaru hissed as he gingerly tried to sit up on the crappy sofa that he was laying on. The blanket across his chest pooled at his lap as his lower back stung like a bitch. Dammit, Nara was right. That couch did cause one hell of a bad back. Good thing Naruto decided to burn theirs in a bonfire after learning about Kaien and Daisuke's, um, fun time on it while they had been away when the boys were eighteen.

Which only meant that this wasn't his house.

Man, what a drag.

"You know that's a bad word, Daddy." Shikamaru's neck creaked horribly as Motoko popped into view. His youngest baby girl had been snuggled up on the futon next to him.

"Come here, Little Fawn." Screw his back, Shikamaru decided as he tucked Motoko under his chin. He fell softly onto the pillow as the relief started to set in. His baby was safe. "You're right, Motoko. That was a bad word and we're not going to tell Mommy that you learned it from me." The four-year old gave him a mischievous look that Shikamaru totally blamed Naruto's side of the family for.

"I want dango and five Bring-Momo-to-Work-Days." She even raised her hand with all of her fingers spread out just to emphasize how serious she was.

"Dango and 3 days." Yes, he was bargaining with a four-year-old. Don't judge him.

"Dango, 2 days, and ice cream."

"Deal." Motoko snuggled deeper into him, her little hand twirling the end of his beard goatee. "Where is everyone?"

"Outside, Daddy. Mommy made omelets with smiley faces for breakfast."

"And why aren't you eating?" Motoko buried herself deeper against his neck in an effort to escape his question. "Motoko Nara Uzumaki, you know better than to sleep through breakfast."

"But Daddy… then you would be all alone and Mommy wouldn't eat."

He should have known.

So many thoughts spun in the Commander's head from that little answer. The first being that he had the most troublesome, yet loving children in the world. The second, they had all inherited his keen eye, his bluntness and Naruto's brashness and no one in Konoha was safe from their observations. The third, it finally clicked that Motoko was saying Mommy as if Naruto was there.

The futon hadn't been Motoko's. It had been Naruto's which meant she slept by his side while he was MIA.

Which could only mean-

"Come on, Little Fawn." Ignoring the urge to curse in pain as he stood. "Let's go see Mommy and make sure she's eating." To his utter surprise, Motoko threw herself out of his arms and spun around to glare a 'Really, Daddy?' look with a pair of stern crossed arms.

Had he been out of it for that long that Motoko had gone through her Daddy-Pick-Me-Up phase already? Shikamaru could barely handle it when it happened to Mirai, Shikamira, Benihime and Takashi (for a breath instance, Takashi had always been more of a Mama's boy). He sure as hell wasn't ready for Motoko to go through it too.

Yes, he was in denial about his children growing up way too fast.

Again, don't judge him.

"Bad Daddy." She reached up to grabbed his hand. "Granny said not to do anything silly until she said so." No, he did not breathe a sigh of relief at that logical answer (be quiet, Ino).

Each step through the kitchen started to weigh down on him as the anticipation built. He could hear his heart beat against his chest as the smallest Nara Uzumaki pulled him onto the porch. _We must be living up to Mom's nickname,_ he mused as no one made moves to look towards him. To his left, the adults laughed through memories of easy missions as the genin were bunched together in a whispering huddle that could only mean trouble. Why, you may be asking?

Because Shikamira and Takashi were clearly leading the operation with Benihime perched between them as both a sentinel and an advisor. Boruto and Himawari appeared to be learning intently at whatever the twins were teaching them while Shikadai threw in his two cents. The remaining genin giggled behind their hands as wild hand movements flew amongst the group.

He felt like he could breathe again because they were safe. His kids were all safe, including his newly adopted kids from this world.

All that was left was his wife.

"You're awake." Shikamaru restrained the instinct to stab at the voice behind him as he flinched. "Your wife's been worried about you." Temari crossed her arms underneath her bust. "What idiot knocks himself unconscious twice in the same night?"

"Nice to see you too, Temari." The only reason he didn't roll his eyes at her was because he didn't feel like getting knocked in the head. "Where's Naruto?" She smirked at him.

"Which one?" Now she was just trying to play mind games with him. Huh, guess the Temari here isn't too different from the one that he knows back at home. What a drag.

"You know which-"

"DADDY!"

Perhaps he wasn't as healed up as he thought when the wind got knocked out of him from Benihime's tackle. Shikamaru hunched down to lift his thirdborn to his hip as the redette sobbed uncontrollably. Like any father with girls, his first instinct was to murder whatever son of a bitch caused his daughter's tears. However, seeing as he was the quote 'son of a bitch,' that would be a little hard for him to do. Shikamaru started to rock her back and forth in an attempt to calm her.

"Hush." He messaged her scalp as she stated hiccupping through the tears. "Daddy's here. I've got you."

"Bad Daddy." Benihime peeled herself away from his neck to scolded him. "Seals are bad for you."

"I-" His attempts at interrupting were short-lived as Benihime plowed through with her comments, wiping away her tears put on her very serious, yet adorable face. He blamed Naruto for her rapid mood swings.

"Seals are _very_ bad for you and Mommy said no more seals for you!" She poked her finger against his collarbone for emphasize. "Mira and Taka and Momo and me-"

"And I, Benihime." No child of his would have improper grammar, even while ranting.

"Daddy!" His redhaired whirlpool pouted. "I was making a special point." She coughed dramatically. "We've decided that only Mommy can be the im-, im-, im-"

"Impulsive?" He could feel Temari's smirk burning into his back. Looks like she enjoys seeing him squirm under the wrath of the fairer sex. _Fairer, ha._

"Yes, impulsive! Thanks, Miss Temari!" Benihime chimed. "Only Mommy can be the impulsive one." He raised an eyebrow at her before glancing at Motoko, who nodded along happily. Shikamira and Takashi stood a few yards in front of him, his eldest girl looking so much like her mother right. She was giving him the 'I've made the final decision and you're going to have to deal with it' look, complete with Naruto's glare and hands on hips combo. Takashi shrugged to him.

"Sorry Dad, we've been outvoted." Of course, they had… His life, forever run by the women in his life. "If it makes you feel better, I thought what you did, while stupid, was pretty badass."

Naturally, this caused all of his girls to throw a glare at Takashi.

"No, don't encourage it, idiot!" Shikamira snapped. "At the rate his going, Dad will be the newest member of the 'Lord-Nara-Who-Died-Before-His-Fifties' club!"

Gasps sounded throughout the backyard as Shikamira bowed her head in shame. Her comment stung, no matter how much Shikamaru knew that she's didn't mean it. She was scared and had blurted out the ever-present fear that his kids had. His great grandfather, grandfather and father had all died in combat before their fifties, his grandfather's and father's deaths coming from the Shinobi Wars. Shikamaru knew this knowledge haunted his family and he was determined to do everything in his power to break this 'curse'.

"I'm sorry, Dad. That was-" Her voice shook with guilt. Shikamaru sighed as he lifted his open arm out. Benihime slid down his side as Shikamira ran into him. He hugged her close and kissed her hairline. She shook like a leaf against him but refused to cry. Takashi shifted his weight before them. His boy was becoming a man and Shikamaru could tell that there were too many people watching them for Takashi to use up their yearly display of affection. Which is why he signed 'I love you' to his son against Shikamira's back so that only Takashi could see it. His boy puffed out his chest with pride as he signed it back. Shikamira peeled herself out of his grasp with a smile.

"So, what should we call you, exactly?"

Huh?

Perhaps he did have some brain damage because he struggled to process Boruto's question. Ok, so he was being a little dramatic but he was taken aback by the question.

"Yeah, because we can't call you Daddy, because you aren't our Daddy or our Mommy, but we need to call you something!" Himawari reaffirmed as she rocked back and forth on her heels, her whiskered cheeks pulled back into a big smile.

Shikamaru opened his mouth before shutting it. He didn't really know what to do. When he thought about it, the amount of time that he spent with Male Naruto's kids was minimal at best. He was shocked that they were even talking to him, let alone trying to give him a nickname. He was about to tell them that they didn't have to call him anything when he noticed Shikadai.

The boy stood even further back from them and to most, it would look like he wasn't listening to the conversation at all. But his back was tense and the way his head was titled made it clear that he was listening to every word. All three of them were staring at him impatiently and he couldn't help but be taken back to the day when he received his first and only genin team.

" _So what do we call you?" Daisuke had been the brave one to ask after their introduction/lunch at Yakiniku Q. Of the three, Daisuke was by fair the polite one of his misfits._

" _Like, do we have to call you Commander and bow and shit?" Retsu muttered under her breathe, obviously thinking that he couldn't hear her._

" _We'll discuss it, if you guys pass my test." His comment caused Kaien to snort, the then 12-year-old not even looking up from his nail filling to say,_

" _Test? We've already passed our testing. That's why we're here, duh." He was so going to kill Kakashi after he failed these brats._

 _Except Shikamaru didn't fail these brats that the academy threw together to make a team that the folder literally said doomed to fail. They shouldn't have worked well together but they did. Their eccentric personalities that both clashed and melded together made for the most backwards teamwork that he has ever seen and yet, it somehow still worked. He saw their potential and knew that they need him. Retsu and Kaien had never had a stable adult figure in their lives while Daisuke seemed crippled by his parents' expectations. So as he led them to his house for dinner (because there was no way in hell Naruto was going to be okay with not meeting his team), Daisuke asked again._

" _What do we call you?" There was hope and wonder in all three of their eyes now._

" _Sensei." Shikamaru answered swiftly. "Just call me Sensei." Their smiles were forever burnt into his memory._

"Uncle." It was like history was repeating itself. "Just call me Uncle." Right down to the smiles of children.

Now, after all of that, where was-

"Oi, Nara, you're awake!"

Shikamaru's brain loved to analyze. It loved to take note of the finest details. It took note of this world's Sasuke and Sakura standing close to each other. It noticed how Hinata refused to look at the Lady Fifth unless necessary, the Hyuga's jaw clenched painfully at the sight of the Senju. It noticed how his and Naruto's counterparts flanked his wife not protectively but obviously enough to see that they had taken his request very seriously.

He zeroed in on her and nothing else mattered. There she stood, her dress missing a chunk of its fabric, revealing her exposed seal. Her hair threatened to break from its braid. In contrast, the awakened and lively grace shined through her. She looked as if she had been to battle, smiling her way to victory. Only Naruto could look so haphazard yet elegantly beautiful. It was like that first day at the academy all over again. Her uniqueness called to him, teasing him to unravel her puzzle that she called life. Unlike then, which was a brashness yet friendly 'Hi, I'm Naruto Uzumaki and I'm going to be Hokage!' and the start of a beautiful romance, there was tension so thick in the air that he would have been taken aback by it if he was one of the main contributors to it.

The war of wills had begun.

Man v. Woman.

Hokage v. Commander.

Husband v. Wife.

 _It's back._ Shikamaru had to restrain himself from groaning as they're one recurring argument that they've had since Naruto became Hokage reared its ugly head once again.

Naruto was the Hokage. She commanded the shinobi of Konoha. If she gave him an order, he followed it out, no questions asked. And he did.

Expect when it came to her safety. He'd do anything to keep her safe, which she knew. That is why she liked to order him to stop doing it while throwing herself into harm's way to protect him.

There would always be a part of him that despised the fact that he could never protect Naruto the way that he wanted to. He had always been protective of her since that day she entered his classroom. She had been far smaller than the rest of class, clearly underfed and ill-dressed but her gorgeous smile, bright eyes and golden hair lit up the room. He knew that he was lost to her light the moment she started talking to him in the hallway. Naruto was such an enigma, the girl with nothing who gave the world everything. Konoha didn't deserve her forgiveness, Shikamaru had decided that when they were twelve, but God damnit, if she wanted to be the Hokage, then he would do everything that he could to make it happen.

Even if it meant pushing her to become stronger than him, convincing her to leave him and go with Jiraiya on her training trip. Even if it meant hours upon hours of training that he did willingly (while complaining along the way, of course) in order to not get left behind. Even if it meant sacrificing himself and his sanity if it meant that she was safe.

Naruto could fight her own battles, she always could. But she was still his light, his wife, his reason to live. She was his to protect, support and love. So yes, he may be slightly chauvinist but Shikamaru didn't care.

As you could see, it was quite the conundrum that they had.

A leaf blew in the wind.

If Benihime's hug knocked the wind out of him, Naruto's nearly swept him off of his feet. He stumbled but kept upright as his arms circled her waist, his hand clutching at her hip as the other tucked her head even deeper against his neck. Naruto whimpered softly at his pulse point as her hands threaded into the back of his ponytail. One hand slipped lower until it rested under his chin, her finger searching for the rapid beating of his heart. Shikamaru's head dropped into the crook of her shoulder, her comforting scent and warm body releasing all of his stress.

"Dammit, I wanted them to kiss."

"Ino!" Nara protested loudly.

"I'm disappointed as well."

"Hinata! Why would you-"

"I'm mad at you." Naruto, in typical her fashion, cut off her counterpart's dramatic speech to pull away from Shikamaru just enough to look up at him end in the eye.

It was a rather toned-down post 'You Nearly Died, You Idiot!' hug that they had shared in his humble opinion (Ino and Hinata insisted that the couple's hug after the battle with Pain beat out any other contenders, past, present and future). Which he blamed Naruto for, because it was her idea to turned down the PDA because both of their counterparts were men and not together, and it would be weird, and awkward, and all that crap. Shikamaru had agreed, while grumbling that it was totally unfair that _he_ couldn't kiss _his wife_.

Sorry, he got sidetrack.

Back to the situation at hand, Shikamaru could have groaned but stopped himself before he really put himself in the doghouse. Even locked in his arms, she could easily throw a fan or kunai at him (though violence wasn't Naruto's normal course of action during one of their fights, unless she was pregnant). Thus, he did the only thing that he could do in situations such as these.

"Okay." Agree to everything the wife says until she calms down. Works every time.

"You were impulsive, made a stupid decision and nearly died. Again." Well, she was still as blunt as always.

"Yes, dear, I'm well aware that you're the only one who can be impulsive and live." Luckily for him, Naruto decided to ignore his sass to continue her monologue.

"You disobeyed a direct order."

"I'll apologize for that later."

"You could have died."

"Yes, dear."

"Are you just going to keep agreeing with everything I say?"

"Will I be in less trouble?"

"Yes- No!" She slapped his bicep lightly with the back of her hand. "Now is not the time for you to be a smartass."

"Eh." Shikamaru shrugged a smirk when he noticed her fighting a smile. "It was worth a shot."

"And if you ever make me worry like that again..." Naruto left the threat hanging in the air, teasing him with all the possibilities it could go.

She could demote him, put him on probation, sic another genin team on him. She could ban sex for an indefinite amount of time, which was definitely the scariest threat that she had at her disposal. In moments like these, Shikamaru could never tell what she would do but that's what he loved about her. Her unpredictability kept him on his toes. What he could tell, however, was how aroused she was right now and he had no problems using that to his advantage. He leaned down closer to her. She licked her lips as her pupils dilated.

"You'll burn me at the stake?" He laughed at the insulted look that graced her features.

"Who do you think I am, an Uchiha?" There was a dual 'Hey!' that Naruto ignored. "I use wind ninjutsu, I'd knock you all the way to Kumo." She inched closer to him.

"Right." Only they could have an argument into a battle of wits that was also a turn on. "My mistake."

Screw it.

Their kiss was the concoction of stress, separation anxiety, life and death situations and raging hormones. It was hard, needy and he wanted nothing more than to throw her over his shoulder and take them somewhere where they wouldn't be disturbed. He wanted it so badly and the way that her nails clawed at his hair told him just how much she wanted it too.

"Hot damn!"

"Gah, my eyes!"

"So Youthfully Beautiful!"

"Hinata, the ship has sailed! I repeat. The ship has sailed!"

"I'm going to need to bleach out my brain now."

"I'll just be here, dying from embarrassment. Nothing to see here."

"Mom, Dad, stop. You're embarrassing us."

"Shut up, Taka, it's romantic!"

Sadly, they had an audience. Naruto pulled back from the kiss first. A flushed rose blossomed against her cheeks; her lips kissed into a cherry red. He loved the fact that he could still make her blush after all of these years.

"I'm still mad at you."

"Okay."

"And you are still in trouble."

"That's fine." It felt good to laugh. "We can deal with that later."

Sadly, they cut their reunion short as breakfast wrapped up. It was time to check in on the other dimension for, hopefully, their final update before they went home. Naturally, being the man of the family, Shikamaru offered his chakra up to active the seal. This spurred the violent 'NO!' from his girls while Takashi was no help at all (Dad, you walked into that one).

… Troublesome women.

"Nara, Uzumaki, got a second?" Luckily, it gave Shikamaru a window to talk with the Lord Hokage and his advisor. The men convened in his (Nara's, whoever it was) office. Shikamaru didn't know all of the details of what happened last night but he could see a change in the men. They look determined and energized. He stored this information to the side, tucking it way as he closed the door.

"Why are you-" Uzumaki cut himself off as he took in the sight before him.

It had been a very long time since Shikamaru bowed before anyone besides his wife in a formal setting. He held the bow for a few more seconds before rising.

"Thank you." His voice shook with emotions but he forced it down. "Thank you, for all that you've done."

There were so many things he was thanking them for. For allowing his kids into their homes. For welcoming them into their family. For protecting them when he couldn't. He could have said more but didn't trust himself to not screw it up because when he got emotional, it wasn't pretty. Luckily for him, Nara caught on pretty quickly.

"Man, stop being so troublesome." Nara yawned, rubbing the back of his neck. "Of course we were going to help."

"Absolutely!" Uzumaki chirped in. "And don't think that we would do it again, because we would."

"Even still-"

"Your wife mentioned something about you guys needing babysitters."

"She did?" He asked in unison of Uzumaki, who sounded way more excited than he did, at Nara's abrupt comment.

"Yep." Nara shrugged. "Look, you guys are always welcomed here and if the kids want to visit, there's more than enough room here at the compound."

"And my house has plenty of room too!" Uzumaki beamed. "This way, we can learn about and from each other! It'll be prefect!"

Shikamaru hadn't really thought about what was going to happen when his family went home. Granted, he was unconscious earlier and that didn't help matters. But he knew that his kids had bonded a lot with their counterparts. And, Shikamaru took in the men before him, he knew that these men loved his kids as their own. Also, there was a part of him that wanted to know more about his kids' counterparts too. Afterall, they were calling him Uncle now.

"Agreed, and you guys are also welcomed in my home. Naruto and I are used to hosting a lot of people in our house anyway." Somehow, the Konoha 11 plus their spans always end up at his house for some unholy reason. He was ready to end the conversation at that when he remembered his ancestor's warning.

"Something's coming." Nara and Uzumaki straightened at the dread in his voice. "I don't know what and I don't know when but Shika Nara specifically told me that she awakened Shikadai to prepare him." Nara bristled while Uzumaki blinked him.

"You spoke to her? I thought you were unconscious."

"Not important, Naruto." Nara snapped. "Stupid cryptic messages from the dead." Amen to that. "We'll have to up the spy network again." Uzumaki sighed, nodding in agreement at his advisor's words.

"I'll have Sai do it later." The blonde ran a hand through his hair. "We're also going to start taking a more hands-on approach to the kids' training."

"That's good." Shikamaru sighed in relief. "Because whatever is coming, it's going to be big."

"Leave it to us." Uzumaki promised. "We'll take care of it. Believe it!"

"… That was so cheesy."

"Shut up, Shikamaru! No one asked for your opinion!" Man, they were just like him and his wife, except without all of the lovey dovey bits.

He should have known that his luck was about to run out. He should have known that Naruto left him off of the hook too easily, if her smirk was anything to go by when he reentered the living room with their counterparts. He should have known that he had forgotten something.

"SENSEI?! There's two of you?! And what happened to your beard?!"

…

Man, what a drag. At least it couldn't get any wor-

"What the hell? Is Miss Naruto a man now?!"

"And a hot one at that."

"Kaien!"

God dammit. His brats were back.

 **Author's Note - Am I the only one that thinks that if Canon Shikamaru ever had girls he would behaved just like my version of him?Like, his daughters have him whipped around their pinky fingers while the wife is laying down the law. Please tell me if you see this too. Also, what was with Canon and having none of the original Konoha 12 with genin teams of their own?! It's criminal, criminal I tell you. Now, I could be wrong about that but you know what, I'm giving 2.0 Shika a genin team that would drive him insane for being the lovable little shits that they are. Also, you guys got to meet Ichiro and that reunion scene, be still my beating heart, be still! Ok, I'm done being dramatic (for now, at least). Please comment guys! I want to hear from you! So, review, favorite and follow! I love you guys so much! See you guys next time!**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**

* * *

 _Boruto_

"Man, your dad's team is..."

"Eccentric, funny, bat shit crazy?"

"You forgot violent, Taka."

"Ah, you're right." Boruto sweatdropped at the twins' comments while Shikadai muttered under his breathe,

"Thank God Dad never had a genin team. I'd never get my nap."

A peaceful silence over came them all when a thought popped up.

"Hey guys?"

"Yeah, Ruto?"

"Where do you think No Name came from? Like, was he from this world or your world?"

More silence.

"Dammit, I knew something still felt off."

"And here I though you remember everything, Miss Photographic Memory?"

"Be quiet, Taka! Nobody asked you!"

* * *

 **P.S. Did I forget about my scene with No Name? Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. We may never know.**

 **-V.I. Winthrop**


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